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English
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Published:
2014-02-17
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2,457
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1/1
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6
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A Norwegian Getaway

Summary:

Two sisters save their money to get to the Ylvis concert in Bergen and rent a secluded cabin. They are shocked when they meet their neighbors!

Notes:

This is an anon story I wrote for a tumblr friend, so forgive the choppy paragraphs. Formatted to fit tumblr posts!

Work Text:

You can’t believe you’ve made it to Norway for two glorious weeks! You and your sister decided to make every sacrifice possible to make enough money for this big trip. You’ve practiced Norwegian phrases and chose things to do on your trip that were not very “touristy” but more what real Norwegians would do. Your big indulgence was to get tickets for the Ylvis concert in Bergen.

You were able to meet up with some tumblr friends and live your dream by seeing the talented brothers perform in person. The concert met your every expectation and you were blown away by their talent and humor. Although you couldn’t understand everything they were saying (your norsk isn’t THAT good yet), you were able to sing along with familiar songs and laugh at the physical comedy. After two days in Bergen enjoying the beautiful sights, spending time with new Norwegian friends, you venture out to your next getaway, an authentic Norwegian cabin like the one in the Ylvis song.

You and Lívia had never stayed anywhere so rustic, but you knew you had to have the experience. After a long drive and hike through the woods, there it is! The caretaker, Hans, is there to greet you and show you around the place. Although it is springtime, it is still quite chilly, especially to a couple of Brazilian girls. Wood is already chopped, stocked to keep the stove and the sauna heated. There’s a cold room where food can be stored. Candles and lanterns are at the ready to light the cabin at night. He shows you around outside to a bonfire pit. “This is shared with the next cabin over, which is also mine. I think my sons might be staying here in a few days, so don’t be alarmed if they show up. I’m sure they’d be happy to share stories around a bonfire with you, especially if you cook a meal for them, ” Hans gives a wink as you and Lívia smile back.

The caretaker bids his farewell. Your cell phones don’t get any reception this deep in the woods, so he shows you a CB radio that’s set up in the kitchen. It is hooked up to some of the neighboring cabins just in case you need to reach help. Lívia looks a bit concerned, but you are proud of yourself for embarking on such a daring adventure. “Are we completely out of our comfort zone or what?” you ask your sister. “We’ve never been so isolated before. There are ALWAYS people around back home. I’m glad I brought so many books to read!”

Lívia replies, “well, I was hoping to get more norsk practice, but unless Hans’ sons show up I guess I’m out of luck.” “Jeg skal prøve å hjelpe deg. La oss bare snakke norsk mens vi er her.” You surprise your sister with two full sentences, offering to help by only speaking norsk during your stay. “You are too smart for me, Lah. I have no idea what you just said,” Lívia sighs. You give your sister a laughter-filled hug. “Ohhhh, come on. Let’s unpack!”

You’ve brought a few lions from your plushie collection so you won’t feel too homesick. You place these on the table next to your bed in the double bedroom, decked out in nubby flannel sheets and itchy wool blankets. “I guess this is authentic,” you mutter to yourself. “I thought you were excited to be out of your comfort zone?” asks your sister with a smirk. You’re both a bit too timid to start your own bonfire outside tonight, and you’re pretty exhausted from your adventures of the last several days. So when the sun goes down, you and Lívia settle into bed in the dark, quiet cabin, the only sound being your laughter as you recount the fun you had at the Ylvis concert.

During the next two days you learn how to truly relax and commune with nature. You don’t stray too far from your cabin, afraid you’d get lost in the woods on a hike, but you do spend time outside reading books, playing the old board games stashed away, cooking simple food. You’re happy to spend quiet, happy time with your sister. Life at home and school has been very stressful, and this trip is just what you needed to reconnect.

You decide that night to make your favorite dish, stroganoff. It will be a bit hard to cook with the primitive cookstove, but you’re going to do your best. As you get the supplies out of the cold room you hear strange noises coming from the CB radio. It sounds like a song. “Hello, Lah and Lívia, are you there? We are your neighbors, and we would like to come meet you. Are you enjoying our papa’s cabin? We hope you are having a good time. Lah and Lívia, we hope to meet you soon!” The words are in a nonsense melody, but the voices sound vaguely familiar.

You pick up the radio mic and push the button. “Hei hei! This is Lah, you should come over! I am making dinner!” The radio voices respond: “Hueeeee! We will see you soon!” Lívia asks, “do you know who that sounds like, Lah? It couldn’t be, could it?” You both can’t contain your excitement and rush to tidy up the cabin before your mystery neighbors arrive. You hear footsteps approach the cabin and a knock at the door. You race Lívia to see who can get to the door first but it opens just as you arrive. Your hunch was right. Standing there, in your cabin, are Bård and Vegard Ylvisåker, your whole reason for coming to Norway in the first place. Their smiles light up the room and you think you are going to faint.

“It’s you…”says Lívia. “Yes, it’s us! says the taller brother. “I’m Bård and this is Vegard.” They step forward to shake your hands. How can their hands be so warm and soft? You introduce yourselves. “Our dad said we’d have neighbors this week and you might need some help since you’ve never stayed in a cabin before. How are things going?” You realize your stroganoff noodles are boiling, and you all head for the kitchen.

You ask why they are here. Vegard says, “Well, we’re actually here to wrap up some work. We’ve been working very hard the last several months and we’re about to go our separate ways for extended vacations with our wives and kids. We like to come up here to kick around ideas for the next projects that will be lined up when we return in August.” They are very interested in Brazil and want to know about where you live and then they ask, “Why did you decide to come to Norway for a vacation when you live in a vacation capitol?” You and Lívia both look a bit sheepish, and she admits quietly, “well, we came for your concert. We are very big fans of yours.” A look of pleasant surprise hits their faces. “I knew it! says Bård. “You didn’t ask us what we did, even when Vegard mentioned how we work together, because you already knew!

“But we aren’t stalkers, I swear!” you shout. “We had no idea Hans was your dad. We just found the listing for the cabin rental online!” Bård laughs, “I don’t know, you both seem like a couple of suspicious characters to me. I am impressed you’ve kept your fangirling enthusiasm to a minimum. You aren’t even sweating or shaking,” he smiles. Vegard gives Bård a scolding look, “don’t give them a hard time. They’re very sweet, and they’re making us dinner. Which smells delicious, by the way!” You really can’t believe this is happening. You look at Vegard and say, “you know, it was really your song that convinced us we needed to stay in a cabin in Norway. You made it look so enticing.” The room bursts into laughter.

You continue chatting, laughing, and preparing your meal. Vegard suggests that you eat by a fire outside, since the sun is starting to go down. The guys offer to go set up the bonfire and you agree to meet them outside when dinner is ready. They get out an old camp table from the closet and take it with them so you can set up the food. When they leave, you fall into Lívia’s arms, “Can you believe this is happening? I’m so glad they don’t think we’re acting weird, because inside I’m DYING!” Your sister hugs you tight, “Me too, Lah, this is like a dream and any minute we’re going to wake up.”

You finish preparing dinner and set up four plates to carry outside. The fire is already ablaze and you see the brothers brought guitars with them and are plinking away at the strings. You don’t know if it is the heat from the fire or the thought of your own private Ylvis concert that is making you melt.

“Allright, the food is here!” they cheer in unison, then begin to improvise a song, “Our beautiful Brazilian chefs, have made a lovely meal. They pretend they are not fangirls, as our hearts they try to steal. We’ll sing around the fire, and eat up all the food, and when we all are finished, we’ll all say ‘Herregud!”

Everyone is starving so there isn’t much chatter as you are busy eating. The guys both go for seconds, and they tell you stories about the crazy people they’ve met all over the world since The Fox became viral. They are as shell-shocked by the whole experience as you are just being able to sit here with them now.

As the stars begin to appear in the sky, you point out some of the constellations you can see through the trees. Lívia says, “Lah can tell you all about your personality by your astrological sign.” “Oh really?” says the skeptic Vegard. “Yes, Vegard, you, I believe, are a Taurus, the sign of the Bull. You are resourceful, thorough and devoted.” you say in a matter-of-fact way.

“And you, Bård, you are an Aries, the sign of the Ram. You are individualistic, assertive, and freedom-loving.” “He does like to ram his way around until he gets his way,” says Vegard. You check the birthdates of the brothers with your predictions and are proud to see that you are correct. “That’s a bit creepy,” says Vegard, “we met a few too many new-agey people when filming Norges Herligste to totally discount all of it, but I still prefer science!”

They are so nice and funny and beautiful, and it is clear their brotherly love is so strong. You realize you and your sister have that same kind of bond. Vegard goes back to their cabin, saying he’ll bring dessert. He brings a bunch of bananas and a jar of nutella. “Nothing fancy, but delicious!” he exclaims. Bård shouts “Banan!” and throws a banana at you. He does the same thing to Lívia, and is impressed you both reacted quick and caught the fruit in midair.

“You’ve passed the Banan Test, ladies! Enjoy dessert!” Vegard laughs. He pulls out a ukulele that he brought back with him on his last trip inside. "So I thought you might enjoy the one Portuguese song we know. We used to perform it in one of our early stage shows. Do you remember your guitar part, Bård?" You already know what he’s going to play, and your previously melted heart begins to bubble. They strum the familiar tune and Vegard’s beautiful, perfect voice brings the song to life…

Sonho meu, sonho meu
Vai buscar que mora longe, sonho meu
Sonho meu, sonho meu
Vai buscar que mora longe, sonho meu
Vai mostrar esta saudade, sonho meu
Com a sua liberdade, sonho meu
No meu céu a estrela guia se perdeu
A madrugada fria só me traz melancolia, sonho meu
Sinto o canto da noite na boca do vento
Fazer a dança das flores no meu pensamento
Traz a pureza de um samba
Sentido, marcado de mágoas de amor
Um samba que mexe o corpo da gente
O vento vadio embalando a flor, sonho meu
Sonho meu, sonho meu
Vai buscar que mora longe, sonho meu
Sonho meu, sonho meu
Vai buscar que mora longe, sonho meu

You know you're in Norway, but you feel like you're back at home. You pull Lívia out of her seat and bring her in your arms to dance to the song, you can’t help yourselves! What a beautiful moment hearing the talented brothers perform a song in your native language, just for you.

After getting through the song once, the guys put their instruments down but continue to sing, with Bård joining Vegard for some harmony. Vegard takes your arm and pulls you in to continue your dance, and Bård takes Lívia in his arms. They sing sweetly in your ears as you glide around the fire. You’ve never had a more perfect experience in your entire life. You don’t want the song to end, but it does, and you and Lívia applaud your twinkle-toed troubadours.

“That was simply amazing, and you get the accent down perfectly!” you tell Vegard. “He definitely has a thing about accents and dialects,” says Bård. “And Bård has a thing for talking like Donald Duck,” says Vegard. Everyone erupts in fits of laughter as Bård puts on a derpy face and does his best impression of Donald Duck singing Sonhu Meu.

It’s getting late, and you are sad but know your magical evening is coming to an end. The brothers help you clean up and they douse the fire. You know they have to work the next day, but since they discovered you haven’t been on a hike they offer to meet you in the afternoon to show you through the woods and to a nearby stream where you can replenish your water supply.

You also vow that tomorrow will be an “all-norsk” day so you can practice your language skills. They start early with their farewell, as Vegard says “God natt, vakre søstre! Takk for en flott kveld.” (Good night, lovely sisters! Thank you for a beautiful evening), and Lívia replies, “Vår glede, vakre brødre. Takk for å lage en flott minne.” (Our pleasure, beautiful brothers. Thank you for creating a wonderful memory.)

The evening closes with warm hugs and sweet kisses on the cheeks from the brothers. As you and your sister climb into your cozy beds that night, you know no dream will be able to top what you’ve just experienced, and you hope you can just relive the evening as you slumber.