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Jihoon has been playing piano for twelve years or so, ever since he was four years old. He’s always had a knack for it, even as a toddler plunking out “Twinkle Twinkle” before his first lesson was scheduled. Looking back, he thinks that might’ve been the start of it all. Jihoon was almost immediately a favorite of his teacher and got invited to recitals long before most of the students his age. His parents, his father especially, enjoyed the attention of his teachers maybe more than he did. By age eight, four years in but playing as if he had for six, Jihoon was enjoying his position as the golden child of the piano group.
Then Wen Junhui had to come along and ruin it all.
Junhui moved to town and took the group by storm, impressing the teachers with his skills (playing since he was three, a year longer than Jihoon) and his diligence (willing to play for seemingly hours without rest). For the first time since he started playing, Jihoon wasn't the favorite student. Nothing in his lessons really changed but suddenly Jihoon’s dad couldn't stop talking about that Wen kid and how he would take all the opportunities for young pianists in the town.
Jihoon sort of hated piano for a bit after that. His dad pushed him harder and his teacher, impressed with the improvements, supported it as well. Jihoon didn't want to stop, but he didn't want to sustain that breakneck pace either. With nowhere else to turn, he redirected all his frustration towards the perceived source.
Wen. Junhui.
It got worse in high school. Jihoon and Junhui barely spoke to each other at events and when they did, it was all thinly veiled insults and direct jabs at each other's technique. Jihoon’s dad still seems almost happy that the boys didn't get along- he would use Junhui’s name and accomplishments to threaten Jihoon when he didn't feel like practicing. Even now, as Jihoon sits seething in the auditorium as the audience waits for Junhui to take the stage, his teacher assumes it's a friendly competition and encourages it.
Jihoon isn't being fair, he supposes. Soonyoung had really been trying to get the boys to mend their relationship. He's been friends with Junhui for longer, since they go to the same school and he only met Jihoon when he started piano at ten. Last week, after admittedly maybe one too many rants about Junhui’s stupid talent and stupid face and stupid voice, Soonyoung flopped down onto Jihoon’s bed and sighed loudly.
“Do you ever wonder why you really don’t like the guy, Jihoon?” he had asked.
Jihoon stood with his mouth gaping open for a few seconds, before snapping back, “Isn’t it obvious?”
Soonyoung shrugged. “I think the two of you could get along great if you just put all this weird competitive bullshit behind you. Like, sometimes it seems like you both keep fueling your rivalry because you don’t know how to be anything else to each other.”
Jihoon scoffed at that. “What, because you know him so well?”
“I mean, yeah,” Soonyoung replied. “Junnie’s been helping me with piano since like, before I even met you. I mean, he’s actually really nice if you’d just give him a chance instead of jumping down each other’s throats at every opportunity. Like, he’s really humble and cool about everything-”
“Hey, this is sounding dangerously close to a friendship-ending betrayal,” Jihoon said, narrowing his eyes.
Soonyoung shrugged again. “Just think on it, dude.”
Jihoon didn’t think on it.
He’s still definitely not thinking on it when Junhui walks onstage, looking (unfortunately) incredible in tight black pants and a bizarrely well-fitted black shirt and his hair pushed off his forehead slightly. He scans the audience before sitting down, holding eye contact with Jihoon for a split second before smirking a bit and sitting down to play.
That’s it, that’s another thing Jihoon really hates about Junhui. Ever since puberty hit him like a ton of bricks, Junhui’s been surrounded by admirers at every recital and group function. Jihoon isn’t jealous of the attention at all, really. He has his own group of friends and family that come to everything and shower him in praise. It’s something else that bugs him. Every time he and Junhui are in the same room, for maybe the last two years, he can’t stop himself from finding Junhui and staring at his terrible handsome face. It didn’t used to be so bad, but lately he can’t look away until Junhui finds his eyes, which he always does, and then they just...stare at each other as if even that’s a competition. At first Junhui seemed almost surprised to find Jihoon looking at him, but now at least half the time he’s already staring at Jihoon despite a small crowd of people trying to get his attention. Junhui’s gaze is too strong, it makes Jihoon’s heart beat too fast and his palms sweat and his cheeks flush but he still can’t ever look away.
Junhui starts to play, pulling Jihoon from his internal rant. Even with their longstanding rivalry, Jihoon can’t help but admit that Junhui is a captivating player. It seems like the piano is an extension of his body, the notes flowing freely and smoothly out over the audience and always lingering in the air the perfect amount of time. He’s an amazingly expressive player. Their teacher allows them to use music on stage, typically, but Junhui always ends up closing his eyes anyway and feeling the music instead.
Something’s different today though. Just before a particularly challenging run (Jihoon knows, he’s been practicing the same piece nonstop) Junhui’s eyes snap open and focus right on him. He seems startled and just for a moment, Jihoon can hear his fingers stumble over the notes. In eight years, this is the first time Jihoon has heard Junhui mess up during a performance. It's honestly a tiny mistake that most of the audience probably didn’t even notice, but as Junhui reaches the final notes Jihoon can tell that he’s shaken. He spends about half his usual time bowing to the audience before rushing offstage.
Jihoon feels...weird. If they were still kids, Jihoon is sure that he’d be gloating internally right now. The great Wen Junhui finally makes a mistake in a performance. But instead he’s worried, or something. It’s similar to the sweaty palms feeling he always gets nowadays but with a side of nausea.
The audience is still clapping as Jihoon makes his way backstage to warm up. Junhui’s mistake didn’t matter, of course, they still all loved it. Jihoon’s got the whole intermission to practice, and he really does mean to use it, but the sound of Junhui’s voice carries down the backstage hallway. Jihoon can’t help but creep closer until he can hear.
Junhui’s voice is louder. “It’s one tiny thing, Dad! No one even noticed.”
The other voice, Junhui’s father, is quieter and more menacing. Jihoon feels a chill go down his spine. “It’s one mistake now, then it’s dozens, then the Lee boy gets all the scholarships and you have nothing.”
“I was just distracted for a second, it won’t happen again.” It sounds like Junhui is crying a bit. Jihoon knows he shouldn’t be here but he can’t find it in himself to leave.
Junhui’s father doesn’t say anything to that, but Jihoon can hear one set of footsteps fading away to the opposite side of the stage. He gingerly walks towards the room where Junhui is and cracks open the door.
“Um.” Oh, god, this is weird, he shouldn’t have done this. “Are you okay?”
Junhui is sitting down with his head buried in his hands. He doesn’t look up when he hears Jihoon enter. “Look, Jihoon, the whole rivalry thing is fun or whatever but I really can’t take you rubbing this mistake in my face right now.” Jihoon is speechless. “Yeah, I know you heard it, don’t play dumb.”
“That isn’t-” Jihoon stumbles a bit and walks over to where Junhui sits. “I mean, I did notice it. But I’m not here to gloat or anything.”
Junhui looks up at that. Jihoon is surprised to see how red his eyes and nose are, despite how few tears are streaming down his face. In any other situation, it would have made him laugh hysterically but seeing it now is just pitiful. Before he can say anything else, Junhui reaches out and wraps his arms around Jihoon’s waist. Fortunately, Jihoon has a sweater on over his dress shirt, so when Junhui buries his face in Jihoon’s stomach he doesn’t push him away. Jihoon’s arms flail a bit in the air before he settles on awkwardly patting Junhui’s shoulders.
“My dad says the same kind of things about you,” Jihoon says after a moment of silence. “Like, when I tried to get out of practicing as a kid, he’d always bring up your practice schedule and stuff.” Junhui snuffles a bit at that. “You were honestly-” Jihoon stops as Junhui turns his face to look straight up at his. Even with his face blotchy and snotty, Junhui is unfairly attractive. “You were really great. I bet no one else even noticed.”
Junhui smiles and starts to say something, about his dad or piano or maybe Star Wars. Jihoon isn’t really listening anymore. He can’t stop staring at Junhui’s face. The heart-stopping palm-sweating feeling Jihoon gets when their eyes meet from across the room is magnified at least ten fold. Junhui’s eyes are still a bit shiny from crying and Jihoon feels almost compelled to reach his hand up to wipe away a lingering tear. Whatever Junhui was saying, he trails off and stares back at Jihoon.
Jihoon doesn’t register what he’s doing until he’s suddenly inches away from Junhui’s wide, startled eyes and by then he figures things can’t go back to the way they were. He leans down a bit more and presses his lips to Junhui’s cheek, just where his tears are starting to dry. It’s only a second of contact, but it feels like hours. Jihoon can tell his face is aflame when he pulls away abruptly and breaks Junhui’s hold on him.
“Sorry, I didn’t- I don’t,” he stammers, backing away. “I should really go. Practice. Yeah.”
“Jihoon-” He’s out of the room before Junhui can get to the next word.
What the fuck was that? Jihoon can’t get the question out of his head as he runs scales and a few sections of his solo before intermission is over. Was seeing Junhui so vulnerable, so normal, really such a breaking point for him? Did it really take one thing in common to overcome the years of animosity? Jihoon wracks his brain for answers. Maybe the whole thing was a setup to get into Jihoon’s head and under his skin before his biggest performance of the year. That doesn’t really make sense, though. Junhui didn’t make Jihoon kiss his cheek; if anything, he seems way more shocked by it.
The performance is a blur. Jihoon can barely even remember what piece he played. He’s too focused on how he’s going to avoid Junhui for the rest of his natural life, or maybe he’s thinking about how beautiful Junhui’s eyes are as they stare at him from way too close for comfort. It’s all so weird and confusing and definitely not what he needs on such a stressful night.
Apparently his forgotten performance goes well. His dad claps him on the back after as Soonyoung and a few of their other friends gush over how immaculately he played. Jihoon feels sort of like he’s floating while his heart goes a million miles per hour. His eyes dart around the room, hoping but not hoping to meet Junhui’s.
“Is everything alright, Jihoon?” His dad asks after the second time he fails to answer a question.
“Hm? Oh, uh, yeah, everything’s fine.” Nothing is fine. Jihoon’s palms are sweating so badly he’s sure they’re dripping. “Just leftover adrenaline, I guess.”
“You can relax now, Jihoon!” Soonyoung says. “You were seriously really great.” Really great. That’s what he’d said to Junhui. Seriously, where is Junhui? So Jihoon can know how to avoid him.
Jihoon’s dad claps him on the back once more before wandering over to schmooze with his teacher. Soonyoung is still talking about how amazing the recital was when Jihoon spots Junhui next to the refreshment table, a huge bouquet of roses in his arms and a noticeable group of “fans” around him. He’s looking straight at Jihoon, though, even as someone is grabbing his arm to congratulate him. Junhui turns away for a second, then makes his way across the room to where Jihoon and Soonyoung are standing.
“Are you guys gonna fight?” Soonyoung whispers. Jihoon elbows him in the side.
“Hey Soonyoung,” Junhui is beaming at them for some reason. “Jihoon, could we like, go somewhere else to talk for a bit?”
It’s like Jihoon’s heart is stuck in his throat, preventing him from speaking. He nods instead. Soonyoung laughs nervously. “Don’t kill each other or anything, ok?”
And that’s how Jihoon ends up following Junhui into a hallway a bit away from the crowd of students and their families. Part of him is afraid that Junhui is going to punch him, but he doesn’t seem like the type to not want to do that in public. The alternative might be worse. They stand in awkward silence, both pointedly looking away from each other, before Junhui scratches his head and sighs.
“I don’t really know how to say this, but,” he pauses, biting his lip. It’s really cute and Jihoon hates it. “Could we start over?”
“Start over,” Jihoon repeats.
“Yeah like, we’ve been enemies or whatever for like, the whole time we’ve known each other and I want to...not be that anymore.”
“You said ‘like’ a lot in that sentence.”
Junhui snorts out a laugh. “I guess I just feel like all of this has been a waste of time, you know? Like our parents pitting us against each other when we could have really helped each other out.” Jihoon nods. “Also, I think… Jihoon, I think I might really like you.”
What? “Like me.” Can’t he do anything other than repeat what Junhui says?
Junhui is blushing now, and he ducks his head a bit to hide behind the flowers he’s holding. “Like, I can’t stop looking for you or thinking about you and then when you…” He trails off for a second. “When you came in to help me earlier today it felt kind of like a huge weight was lifted off my shoulders. Plus, I sorta got distracted during the recital because you look really nice tonight. Like, so nice.”
“I wear this to every performance,” Jihoon says. It’s not the right thing to say, but he’s not sure he can say anything else.
“You look really nice every performance but usually you sit in the back row.” Junhui’s whole face is red now, and part of his neck. Jihoon would laugh at him but he can tell he looks the same. “Anyway, I don’t need an answer or anything now but… think on it. Okay?” Jihoon doesn’t answer right away. He’s still a bit dazed from everything. “Even if this ends up being a rejection, I would really like to be friends. Or something like that. If that’s ok with you?”
When Jihoon fails to answer again, Junhui’s face drops a bit and he steps away slightly. Something about that is so deeply wrong to Jihoon. He doesn’t know what he wanted earlier, but he’s sure about what he wants now. He matches Junhui’s steps until they’re face to face again.
“I’ve thought on it,” he says. Before Junhui can voice the question on the tip of his tongue, Jihoon loops a hand behind his neck and pulls him down for a real kiss. He can feel Junhui’s free arm flailing in the air for a second before landing gently on his waist and tugging him closer. It’s weird and clumsy, with the bouquet between them and Junhui’s neck at an awkward angle, but Jihoon thinks it couldn’t be more perfect. They break apart too soon for his liking, but seeing Junhui’s broad smile is almost worth it.
His phone buzzes loudly then, breaking the moment. “Shit, it’s my mom. I think I have to go.”
“Oh. That’s fine. Just to be clear though, this isn’t a rejection, right? Like, if I were to ask you to get coffee or something tomorrow...”
Jihoon laughs at that. “I’m free around two, I think? But I don’t have your number or anything. Kinda avoided that for years.”
Junhui grabs his phone and programs his number in. “Text me when you get home or something. But soon, or else I’ll bug Soonyoung for your number and then he’ll never stop asking you questions.”
“Yes. Yeah, of course. I really gotta run now.” He turns and jogs back to the main area, where his whole family is waiting impatiently.
“Sorry, I was just chatting with some friends,” Jihoon explains when his mom quirks an eyebrow at him. He knows that she’ll drop it after that, but he doesn’t expect Soonyoung to pop out from behind her.
“Did you kill Junhui? Are you wanted for murder now? Also I’m getting a ride with you, surprise!”
“Dude, no, what the hell. We just talked about stuff.” Jihoon can’t stop himself from smiling a bit. “I think we might’ve figured out how to be not-rivals. Or something like that.”
Soonyoung lets out a low whistle. “I thought you were gonna hate that guy to the end of time, to be honest.”
Jihoon shoves him a bit. “Maybe I just… don’t hate him anymore. People change, you know.”
As they reach the car, he sees Junhui from across the parking lot. He lifts his hand up to wave, but Junhui decides to blow him a kiss instead. Soonyoung practically screeches as they get in the backseat of the car. “What the fuck was that? What happened? You were gone for like ten minutes!” Jihoon doesn’t answer, just laughs and pulls his phone out.
To: Junhui~ <3 <3
Soonyoung is freaking out
Also I can’t believe you put that as your contact name
From: Junhui~ <3 <3
;)
So, maybe they’re a bit more than just not-rivals now. There’s time to figure that out. Jihoon’s got a date to plan.