Work Text:
The tick of the second-hand on the clock fills the studio as Yoongi gnaws on his bottom lip. His fingers were busy tapping on the desk, impatiently waiting for the digital time on his computer to change. Just a few more seconds till 12 am and the trailer will be out. The screen of his computer was currently flashing Big Hit’s official YouTube page, still showing no signs of the new music video.
As soon as the digital numbers flip, he sits upright and starts refreshing the page, eyes staring intensely at the bright screen. He jolts in anticipation when he finally sees the new icon.
“Beautiful,” he whispers to himself as his lips tug into a smile.
With trembling hands, he braces himself and clicks on it. He hadn’t realized how hard his heart was beating in his chest until he hears it echoing in his ears. The first notes of the song start and were followed by Jimin’s voice, soft and hushed like he was whispering the lyrics right to him. He was under a spell in a matter of seconds, his mouth agape with wide eyes. Every word Jimin sang it pulled him closer to the screen.
God, how much Yoongi loved his voice, keening into it. So light and feathery, so sweet and angelic. It was a blessing to fill his studio with Jimin’s beautiful voice. Yoongi’s breath was caught in his throat when a scene of Jimin in bed, covered in white sheets came on. His yellow blonde hair contrasted perfectly with his dark brows and pink lips. Jimin looked, simply put, stunning and it was getting his cheeks slightly red. To this day, he still questions how Jimin could look so beautiful that it hurts his heart.
“Love me now, touch now,” sang Jimin.
Yoongi closes his eyes and lets Jimin’s voice caress him as he sings the last verse. He knew that this song was going to go on replay on his phone for the next few weeks. The song was playing so pleasingly in his ears that he hadn’t noticed his studio door opening and closing. It was only when he felt two arms snaking around his neck that he realized, he wasn’t alone. Without the need to open his eyes, he smiles wide, feeling his favorite plump lips touching the skin on his neck. It was searing hot where his lips left wet kisses.
“Just let me love you,” the soft lips sang along to his clone on the screen. “Just let me love you.”
When did he get so lucky?
----
*PAST*
Jimin looks in the mirror, his eyes scouring every detail on his face, trying to find a glimpse of imperfection. He doesn’t know why he does it every time he looks in the mirror. Maybe it was for the fact that he’d find a flaw each and every time that it became an addictive habit. It doesn’t matter what it is - it could be the slant of his eyes, the extra fat on his belly, his puffy cheeks or the faint scars on his skin - each day was different. He wouldn’t cry about it, no...all he does is stare at it with a stoic face, unsure of what to think.
“Stop staring at yourself. You’re going to make me think you’re a little psycho in the head. You know, this is how it starts. You stand in the mirror, staring at yourself for the next 10 minutes and then the voices come, haunting you about how they’re coming for you. Next thing you know, you’re getting locked up in that white room because there’s “someone following you at night and is telling you to kill your hyung”. Frankly, I’m a little scared for my life…”
From the reflection in the mirror, his eyes flicker to the couch where Yoongi was sitting. The older boy was curled in the big pillows, glasses perched on his small nose, brows scrunched together as he scribbled in his notebook. He was, in simple terms, beautiful. Jimin loved to stare at him. It brings a smile to his face and gets his heart beating with fondness.
Everything about Yoongi was intoxicating. His touch was searing, burning a mark on every inch of Jimin’s skin that he touched. His smell was ecstasy, consuming Jimin’s senses with the musky cologne. His voice entranced Jimin as he clings onto every word he speaks, desperate to hear every tone he makes.
Yoongi meant so much to him that it brought pain to his chest and tears in his eyes. If he dared say it, he loved him. He loved him with all his heart and it kills him every day that he couldn’t say it out loud. All he wanted to do was to pull Yoongi into his embrace, hold him tightly, kiss his soft cheeks and confess his love for him. But there was never a day that goes by without him thinking, what he was feeling was wrong. He bites his lips, trying to make the tears go away.
What was so wrong with him for loving someone? Was it because Yoongi was a boy and not a girl? Because they share the same sex? If God had made it that men should love women then why is it that a girl couldn’t get him to feel the things when he’s around Yoongi? He’s tried to love a girl, any girl. His heart just wouldn’t let him. When he goes on dates with girls, it was like a stab to his heart - telling him that he was betraying his true feelings, that he was betraying Yoongi.
“And now you’re staring at me.”
His eyes had glazed over while he was busy gazing at Yoongi. From the mirror’s reflection, their eyes met for a brief second before Jimin turns his head away. He clears his throat as he runs his hand through his hair, desperate to look like he was busy styling it rather than spending those minutes blindly ogling at the boy. His cheeks were red, and so were the tips of his ears.
Jimin knew he fucked up then. It was one thing to fall in love with your guy friend in secret, and it was another to let him find out. He takes a careful peek from the reflection and was relieved to see that Yoongi had focused his attention back to the notebook. At the same time, he could feel his heart breaking into pieces. If only he could love Yoongi freely and be able to stare at him for as long as he likes. With a lump in his throat, he buries his feelings deeper, afraid that if Yoongi knows, it would put a strain on their friendship.
Just as he was about to leave the room, Yoongi calls him. His voice carried a tone of uncertainty and shyness. “I’ve been working on something...and I want you to see for yourself if it’s good.”
The older boy beckons him to come closer, patting the space on the couch beside him. Shaking away the jumble of fireworks in his heart, Jimin stiffly walks up to the couch, taking a seat with caution. He holds his breath as Yoongi scooches over to him. Where their thighs and arms were touching, Jimin could feel a tingle that got him biting his lips.
“I wrote some lyrics, and I want you to know...they’re very personal to me,” Yoongi pointed out as he hands over his notebook. It was folded in half, the page filled with scribbled words exposed to Jimin.
He takes it with shaky hands, still overwhelmed by their close proximity. In order not to seem unnatural, he musters a smile and scans the written words. The paper was a mess filled with scratches, smudges, and scribbles that Jimin could picture Yoongi staying up late at night, trying to fit the words into a song. He notices that the title of the song was printed in clear bold letters, showing no sign of hesitation when it came to naming the song.
"Why'd you name it Serendipity?"
Without missing a beat, Yoongi replies, "It means the occurrence and development of events by chance in a happy or beneficial way. And in a way, the person I wrote this for was a fortunate stroke of serendipity in my life."
Nodding along to his explanation, Jimin started to read the messy lines. He hadn’t even gotten to the fifth line when he feels Yoongi’s breath tickling his neck, realising that the older boy was leaning over his shoulders. Jimin’s mind stutters, he absorbed the next verse with empty meanings, too busy trying not to move an inch, flustered from the heat exuding from Yoongi.
“Are you paying attention to the words?” Yoongi’s gravelly voice sounded deep and velvety, whispering right into his ears.
“What?”
Jimin made the mistake of turning his head. He was now facing Yoongi, their noses touching and lips ghosting over each other. The raven-haired boy smirked ever so slightly before nudging him to turn his attention back to the notebook. Like a rusty hinge, he robotically moves his head, forcing himself not to get flustered. It was impossible when all his senses were on overdrive. His smell, his touch, his voice - they were slowly tearing him apart.
“I’ll read it to you since you’re having trouble concentrating,” Yoongi muses with a lilt in his voice, teasing the boy.
With his heart hammering away in his chest and his tummy in a fit of tumbling butterflies, Jimin nods, urging for him to read it. He secretly wanted to hear more of that deep voice whispering into his ears. Just for today, he was going to submerge himself in Yoongi’s presence.
“As much as my heart flutters, I’m worried. The destiny is jealous of us, just like you, I’m so scared. When you see me when you touch me. The universe has moved for us, there wasn’t even a little miss. Our happiness was meant to be.” Yoongi leans further in, cocking his head to the side so he could see Jimin. “Cause you love me, and I love you.”
A heartbeat passes with silence. He could feel Yoongi’s eyes on him, sending shivers down his spine.
“Do you understand what I’m trying to say?” he asks, willing for Jimin to perceive the meaning behind the lyrics.
Jimin’s lips mouth silent words as he stammers to get his voice back. His eyes keep fleeting to the side, eager to have a look at Yoongi but at the same time, frightened of what was waiting for him if he turned his head. He gulps when Yoongi shifts his body to kneel in between his legs, angling his face so that they were eye to eye. His gaze was enchanting, reeling Jimin in with parted lips.
“You are my blue mold, saving me. My angel, my world. I’m your calico cat, here to see you. Love me now, touch me now,” whispers Yoongi. “Just let me love you.”
His breath hitches as the words dawn on him, understanding what it meant. He was aware of Yoongi’s hands on his thighs, sitting heavy and hot.
Yoongi licks his lips and takes a deep breath. “I wrote this song for you,” he confessed with wide eyes as he searches for a reaction from Jimin. “Or more accurately...about you.”
“What?” Jimin squeaked. His brain was in a muddle and that was the only word he could spew. The thumping of his heart was now echoing in his ears, making his head dizzy.
Yoongi edges forward, closing the distance between them. “I meant every word in that song.” He gingerly holds Jimin’s hands in his, bringing the entangled ball of fingers to his lips. “I know...this is unconventional...this type of love.”
Jimin was as stiff as a statue as he clambers on to every broken word Yoongi was saying. Compared to him, the older boy was a nervous fit - shifting his weight from one knee to the other, gulping as he collects his train of thoughts.
“But I...we’re great to- uh. Fuck I’m sorry I’m bad at this,” Yoongi whines as his head sags, leaning his forehead on their hands.
Gathering up the courage to speak, Jimin coaxed him to continue. “No, no, you’re doing great,” he giggles nervously. He offers him a smile, his heart leaping to his throat when Yoongi reciprocates it.
Taking another deep breath, he starts again. And once Yoongi started, his words flowed like honey, all his thoughts spilling out. “Jimin, you know that I suck ass at expressing my feelings. And it’s harder for me to talk about it. But I’ve...liked you for a long time now and never know how to tell you. At the same time, I wasn’t sure if you felt the same away. Like I said, this love, it’s unconventional and I was afraid you’d be opposed to it. But as of recent times, I can’t hold it back any longer. I needed to tell you how I felt and the only way I could, was through a song. This song.”
Yoongi’s confession crashes over Jimin like a wave filled with emotions. For a second there, it felt like his heart had stopped working. He swears it was all a dream until he felt a burning sensation where he had pinched himself. He wasn’t waking up from this dream, that’s for sure.
“Well? Are you going to leave me hanging?” Yoongi chuckles. In truth, he was laughing to prepare himself for Jimin’s rejection. For all he knew, the sparks between them could’ve meant more to him than Jimin.
Jimin breaks into a smile, snapping out from his dazed dream. He bites his lips as he tries to contain his excitement. “Shit I..hyung I don’t know how to top your confession.”
“Just say yes,” Yoongi begged as he grinned. “Please?”
It was amusing to see the older boy kneeling on his floor with a pout on his lips. “Say yes to what?” he teased, enjoying every moment that Yoongi was between his legs, looking up with wide eyes. “You didn’t ask me a yes or no question.”
Realising that the younger boy was fooling around, Yoongi changed his tactic. Pulling every fiber of charm he has, he pushes him off the floor the same time he leans closer to Jimin. The boy physically gulps, stunned when their faces got closer.
“So you want me to ask you a question?” he asks, dropping the tone of his voice.
He pushes Jimin’s shoulder down until he was lying down on the couch. After all those hours fantasizing what it would feel like to have Jimin flustered under him, the real action satisfied him. He drags his fingers from Jimin’s knee, up his thigh and resting on his hips. The boy shivers from his touch, bringing a smirk to his lips.
“Tell me Jiminie, what kind of question were you expecting?”
Teasing Yoongi was fun but when the tables were turned, he couldn’t help but blush furiously. The question had caught him off guard showing that his attempt at teasing was biting him back in the ass. And he knew that Yoongi loved it when he got hot and bothered by brazen questions like that.
“Hyung,” he whines, embarrassed by the situation he was in. He wonders if the question floating in his mind right now was too forward. As much as he wanted Yoongi to ask that question, he wasn’t about to enlighten him on it with his own words.
Yoongi leans in close, their lips almost touching. It brushes against each other as he talks. “I'm not going to move until you tell me what question you want me to ask you.”
Jimin looks up at Yoongi under his long lashes, taking a peek at the boy straddling him. His gaze was so intense, not breaking eye contact. Afraid that his cheeks would start blushing a deeper red, his eyes fluttered shut as he mulls over the question again and again before plucking the confidence to say it out loud. He takes a deep breath before shakily whispering his answer, aware of how close their lips were.
“If you wanted me to say yes or no, I thought you’d at least have a question for me to answer to. And from the way you begged-”
“I wasn’t begging,” Yoongi interrupted him. “But continue.”
“From the way you…asked, it sounded like you wanted me to say yes to you asking me to be your...boyfriend.”
From his position above Jimin, Yoongi had the perfect view of his face - how his lips were slightly pouting, his cheeks were a shade of pink, his nose scrunched from bashfully declaring that he wanted Yoongi to ask him to be his boyfriend. It was adorable, he thought, sighing with a smile.
He decided to tease his younger friend just a little bit more. “That was a lot of ‘to’s in your sentence.”
Under Jimin’s closed lids, Yoongi could see his eyes rolling at the comment. The boy huffed, “This is what I get for entertaining your little games. You kno-”
He ends the boy’s rambling with a peck, letting his lips linger longer than necessary before pulling back. Jimin gasps in surprise from the sudden intimate contact, his eyes opening wide to see if it really had happened.
“That’s,” Yoongi started in his deep voice as he tenderly sweeps away Jimin’s fringe. “What you get for being honest. All I wanted to hear was if you liked me back that way too.”
Jimin’s heart wasn’t racing anymore. It was beating loud and slow, cherishing the comfortable silence between them. He nods as he bites his lips. “I like you hyung, I do,” Jimin pauses while fiddling with his fingers, a tad shy about saying the next few words. “And I want to be yours.”
The older boy giggles softly, the euphoric nerves in him tingling. “You’re mine,” he whispers before leaning down again, letting their lips touch.
They both swore that the second they came in contact, time stopped. The air around them stood still, their hearts paused a beat and all they could hear was each other’s sigh. This time, the kiss was tender and warm. They start slow, getting used to the shape and feel of each other. The kiss builds up with more rhythm as Jimin tugs Yoongi closer, desperate to have him closer.
Life worked in wondrous ways, Jimin thought. Minutes ago, he was so sure he had no future with Yoongi - that he was obligated to dampen his feelings for the older boy. Now, he found himself safely tucked between Yoongi’s legs and wrapped in his long slender arms as they lie in bed, pointing out the little things they loved about each other. All of that didn’t go without stealing a few kisses - no matter short pecks on the cheeks or long kisses that have his tummy flipping.
----
“Hyung, I’m nervous,” Jimin fretted. His fingers were balled in fists under the long sleeves of his sweater as he paces around the recording studio.
The day that Yoongi first introduced the song to him, he had asked the older boy about how he envisioned for it to sound like. And to his surprise, Yoongi had said he wanted him to sing it. Yoongi wouldn’t stop gushing about how much he loved Jimin’s sweet voice and how it perfectly suited the song - vaguely unaware of how anxious the younger boy had been.
After that conversation, the pair - along with Namjoon - had spent weeks practicing singing the song, tweaking it where it sounded awkward and changing his pitch where it needed a different feel. But it still didn’t help ease the queasiness in Jimin’s stomach. This song was special to them, especially with Yoongi getting so excited about it. Jimin was afraid to mess it up and end up disappointing him.
“Jiminnie,” he said as he held Jimin’s head between his palms. “You did so well during practice. You’re going to sound amazing, trust me.”
Jimin nods, grateful for his encouragement. He takes a deep breath before walking off to the door. Just as he was about to step in, he halts and hurries over to Yoongi. “You think so?”
“Yah!” Yoongi chuckles as he grabs Jimin’s shoulder and turns him around. “You’ll be fine. Go in there already!” He gives a supportive pat on Jimin’s butt, secretly hiding the fact that he needed to find an excuse to touch it.
Everyone settled around the sound board, preparing for Jimin to start singing. The song starts playing and soon, his angelic vocals soared in the room. From where he sat, Yoongi didn’t try to hide his smile. He chewed on his nail with his toothy gummy smile as he listens to Jimin singing with not a single flaw.
“Pabo,” he mutters to himself with a hint of blush on his cheeks as he shakes his head. “Don’t know why you were getting all worked up.”
Hearing Jimin singing the song he wrote exclusively about him, brought out so many emotions in him it was almost overwhelming. Their eyes meet through the thick glass as Jimin sings the line “Cause you love me and I love you” and he feels like his heart was about to burst. God, how did he manage to get the most beautiful person to be his?