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Jeremy stared across the room from where he sat, seemingly in some entrance.
"...And he stole, like, 9 of my cards! Luckily nothing too important, but— Miah? You listenin'?" Michael waved a hand in front of Jeremy's face, eyebrows furrowed.
"...Yeah," Jeremy nodded, looking back to his friend. "Yeah."
"Liar. What are you staring at?"
Jeremy sighed and looked to the ground, then back to where he was staring. "She's so pretty."
Michael followed his gaze and squinted. "Oh, that new Asian girl?"
"..Isn't that kind of racist?"
"No. I'm just saying she's Asian. Which she is."
"How can you even tell?"
"I've got like, Asian gaydar."
Jeremy tilted his head. "You're not even Asian?"
"Yes I am?"
"But.. nevermind. Whatever. This is completely off-topic. Just.. don't you think she's beautiful?"
Michael shrugged. "She's above average, I guess?"
"Above average!? She's like, the prettiest girl in 7th grade!"
"I thought that was Stephanie."
"Okay, she's a close second."
"I thought second was Brooke."
"Third?"
"Elizabeth."
"Okay, she's just really pretty, okay?"
Michael let out a laugh. "Sure dude. I guess. What's her name, anyway?"
"I - I don't.. know.
"Dude. You're in love with someone who's name you don't even know?"
"She's new, it's not my fault!"
"You should ask her."
"What?" Jeremy's eyes widened as he stared at Michael. "Are you freakin' insane!? Mikey, you know I'm horrible at talking to girls!"
"You can't even ask her god damned name?"
"No!"
"Jesus, you're helpless." Michael put a hand on his head and sighed.
Jeremy pulled lightly at Michael's sleeve. "Do you think... you could ask her for me?"
Michael rolled his eyes. "I guess."
Michael walked to the girl and Jeremy took a few steps closer to hear.
"Hey, girl," Michael called, getting her attention. "Can I have a pretty name to put to that pretty face?"
Jeremy facepalmed.
The girl furrowed her eyebrows. "No. Creep."
"Please?"
"No."
"Pretty please?"
"No."
"Pretty, pretty, pretty please?"
"Go away."
Michael furrowed his eyebrows. "Fine," he said, walking away.
"Well, I tried. You'll have to wait 'til class starts, I gue—"
"What the hell was that!" Jeremy half-yelled.
Michael jumped. "Wha - what? I asked her name, like you asked."
"By flirting with her? Doesn't this go against some sort of... bro code or something?"
"Not at all. I didn't flirt with her cuz I like her, dude. I flirted with her to be cool and funny but I guess she's lame or something."
"She's not lame."
"Yeah, whatever. Sit down."
Jeremy sat at his desk and put his head down. "You suck."
"You swallow."
Jeremy glared at Michael.
They didn't speak anymore until rolecall started.
"Allen."
"Here."
"Anderson."
"Here."
"Barnes."
"Here."
"Brooks."
"Here."
"Canigula."
"Here," the girl said, raising her hand.
"Her last name's Canigula," Jeremy noted.
When the teacher called "Heere" and Jeremy said "present" as usual, the girl looked back at Jeremy.
He smiled at her and he swears she swore back but he has this habit to hallucinate gestures from girls so who knows. Maybe she never even looked at him in the first place.
"I swear, Michael, she smiled at me!"
"Uh-huh," Michael nodded, poking at his macaroni. "Didn't you say that about Brooke a while back and ended up being wrong?"
"Yeah, but this time I know it for real!"
"Mmmhmmm." Michael drank his chocolate milk in 4 seconds flat. "Can I have your milk?"
"...Sure, whatever."
Jeremy held his head up with his fist as he watched his friend practically ripped open his second chocolate milk.
"Christine! You /have/ to sit with us!" Kelly, the 7th prettiest girl in 7th grade (speaking of which, Michael and Jeremy came to the conclusion that Canigula was the 6th prettiest) yelled.
The new girl walked to the table with the prettiest girls, obviously embarrassed.
"Christine!" Jeremy slammed his fist on the lunch table with a grin on his face, finally knowing the new girl's name.
"Huh?" Christine turned around, tilting her head.
Jeremy, flustered and four seconds away from having a panic attack mumbled as he tried to come up with an excuse for yelling a stranger's name.
"A different Christine," Michael helped, waving Christine away.
Christine furrowed her eyebrows in confusion but continued walking.
"I'm an idiot." Jeremy muttered.
"You're not an idiot, just in love."
"How can I be in love with someone I don't even know?"
"Because you're a teenager who only cares about looks. It's normal."
"I'm not even a teenager yet."
"What? I thought you were!"
"I'm not."
"Oh my God, you're still 12," Michael laughed.
"Shut up."
...
"Hey," someone said, sitting next to Jeremy.
"Um," Jeremy looked the person up and down nervously.
"The fuck do you want, Jake?" Michael grouched."
Jake Dillinger furrowed his eyebrows. "What's the new bitch's name?"
"Christine. Leave her alone though."
Jake nodded and started walking to the girls' table. "Whatever. See you later, fags."
"Later, asshole." Michael called after him. "What the fuck was that?"
Jeremy shrugged. "He probably wants her name to make fun of her. Or hit on her. Or both."
"What a dick."
"I hope he's not hitting on her."
"She'll probably tell him to fuck off if he is, though. She doesn't seem to like flirty people. Maybe she's a lesbian."
Jeremy nearly choked. "Do - do you think so?"
Michael shrugged. "Y'never know."
"Hey," Christine called to Michael and Jeremy as they went outside.
The two turned around and, as always, Michael did the talking. "Yeah?"
"You're the one who asked my name in homeroom, right?"
"Yeah, why?"
"Hey, I just wanted to say I'm sorry for being bitchy earlier. I was kinda freaking out that someone was flirting with me but I heard you tell your friend that you were just trying to be funny, so."
"Oh, yeah. It's fine."
"You ... you heard our conversation?" Jeremy mumbled.
"Yeah. Sorry. Oh, my name's Christine, by the way."
"Yeah, we figured it out. I'm Michael and this is —" Michael turned to gesture to Jeremy but he was already running home as fast as he could. "...That was Jeremy."
"What's his problem?"
"Probably had to take a huge shit."
Christine laughed.
A car beeped behind Michael and he turned to see. "Oh, those are my moms. I should go."
"Mom.. ss?"
"Yeah. I've got two."
"Oh, that's super cool! I never met someone with two moms before! Well, I'll see you later I guess, Michael! Tell Jeremy I say hi too!"
"See you," Michael said, getting into his car.
He sent a quick text to Jeremy.
mIkEy: She seems nice.
