Work Text:
“Military academy, huh?” Shun mutters. Dennis laughs and shrugs. “Those twins friends of yours?”
“We’re… acquainted,” Dennis replies.
“Acquainted?” he snorts. “You had your nose in Thing One’s cleavage.”
“It’s not my fault they’re that height when Grace is wearing those heels. And what cleavage? The Tylers are flatter than Ruri.”
Shun’s fingers twitch into a fist. “And you notice these things about Ruri because why?”
“Because I go dress shopping with her,” Dennis sighs. “We have to pick out the right dresses that’ll work with the show. Not just any outfit works with the dress change trick, you know?”
“I still object to that trick.”
Dennis laughs and flops back onto Shun’s lap, gazing up at him with that content, slightly smug, smile that does nothing to quell the urge to punch him. Or better yet find a petty reason to arrest him and lock him in a cell like the con artist he is. He’s sure Dennis is making more money from his games in Heartland Park than the actual employees working there.
Worse than that, Shun doesn’t know why Dennis does it. He’s an incredible magician. He’s amazing with kids. His sideshows always draw the biggest crowds, with or without Ruri as his glamorous assistant, which Shun’s sure he does just to piss him off. Dennis doesn’t need to cheat people out of money. Shun can’t figure out why he does it.
“I like the one where the doves on her skirt become real,” Dennis sighs.
“That is a nice one,” Shun admits begrudgingly. “It suits her.”
“Not me?”
“Far too tasteful for you.”
Dennis laughs. “You’re right, I mean just look at my taste in boyfriend.”
Shun scowls. That need to arrest the asshole is rising again. They’re not boyfriends. Not at all. Dennis is just a man who happens to live in Shun’s house a lot of the time. And often ends up in Shun’s bed. Because he has no sense of personal space. Or what’s appropriate. He’s just an idiot who happens to be around a lot. And who Shun has made out with once or twice. Or a few more times than that. But there’s nothing going on between them.
“I have no interest in relationships with criminal scum,” Shun says, turning away and glaring at the wall.
“Wow, Kurosaki,” Dennis sighs. “You’re so deep in denial you might even find some ancient Egyptian river god down there. Maybe then you’ll beat me in a duel.”
“I’m not in denial because there’s nothing to deny,” he snaps. “And was that both a pun and a Duel Monsters joke?”
“Not a very good one, I will admit,” he laughs airily. “But I’m never one to shun a good laugh.”
Shun rolls his eyes and shoves Dennis hard, sending him tumbling off both his lap and the couch and into an undignified heap on the floor. He sighs and steps over the redhead casually, leaving him to dust himself off. He really doesn’t know why he puts up with Dennis some days.
Probably because Ruri likes him for some unfathomable reason.
“So, military academy?” Shun says.
“What? You’re surprised I was a terrible kid who was sent away to be straightened out?” Dennis laughs.
Shun glares back at the door as he strides through the hall and down to the kitchen. A few moments later he can hear Dennis’ footsteps behind him. He’s not surprised. Dennis is a smug bastard who needs straightening out. The problem is, it doesn’t seem to have worked.
“And yet you’ve come out of it as a petty criminal who I’ve given nearly fifty official warnings to in six months,” Shun says.
“That’s like once every three days or so,” Dennis says. “Give or take.”
“Don’t sound so proud when you say that,” he scolds, resisting the urge to turn and glare. “So, what went wrong? Kids like you go to schools like that to be whipped into shape, right? Yet you’re a petty trickster, those twins are well known mercenaries and your friend Yuuri is fifth on the hunters’ most wanted list.”
“Ah, yeah,” he laughs. “Yuuri was always an overachiever.”
“What is wrong with you?”
How could he honestly say these things like they make sense? Like it’s something to be proud of. Obviously whatever school these kids had gone to had done a terrible job of reforming them. They all seem to be rotten to the core.
“You seem to be under a false impression,” Dennis says quietly as quietly as Shun stirs his coffee. “You see, while it’s true we were sent there to be straightened out, you and all the other idiots out there assume that the discipline and order instilled in us was virtuous.”
Shun swings around as the air moves. A blade slams into the cupboard next to his head. Shun presses his gun against Dennis’ head but swallows thickly, watching Dennis’ knife flashing in the light, blade pressed to his throat.
“They taught us to be soldiers,” Dennis says, meeting Shun’s gaze completely unflinchingly. Shun has only seen a handful of people who can stare down the barrel of a gun with no fear at all, even moving towards it. “They taught us to see the lives of others as a game. Trophies to claim with pride. A hunting game.”
Shun narrows his eyes furiously. “You-”
“It’s your mistake to think that we’ve been straightened out and made into heroes,” he says. “They taught us to be efficient soldiers and effective killers. You should consider yourself lucky that a petty trickster is all I am.”
Shun glares for a moment longer before tilting his gun away and Dennis pulls his knife away. As if Shun couldn’t have killed him if he wanted to. He’s one of the best training hunters in the city, he’s not going to be beaten by some rogue magician. If he honestly considered Dennis a threat, he’d be dead. Instead he pulls the other knife from the cupboard and handing it over.
“Ruri won’t approve of you damaging the surfaces like this,” he mutters.
“Ah, true,” Dennis laughs and the knives vanish in mid air. Shun doesn’t even want to ask how he does this stuff. All he ever does is tell him he’s magic anyway. “But she doesn’t have to know.”
Shun sighs and sips his coffee. Dennis really is impossible. Why does he have to be like this? He doesn’t get him at all. Maybe that’s why they ended up like this. Because Dennis doesn’t make any sense. Maybe it’s that intrigue and mystery that got to Shun. It’s certainly not his sparkling personality.
“Why do you have to be like this?” he sighs.
“Huh?” Dennis laughs. “Isn’t that what you love about me?”
“Not in the slightest,” Shun says. He scowls and narrows his eyes at Dennis. “You could always just change sides. Why do you have to be on the wrong side of the law?”
Dennis smirks. “Why do you have to be on the right side of the law?”
“I don’t understand what’d drive someone into that kind of life.”
“Don’t you?”
Dennis smiles and takes Shun’s coffee from his hands, wandering off with it. Shun scowls and follows after him. Why did Dennis seem to think he was entitled to everything that’s Shun’s? It’s nice to see him smiling like that though. Content and warm and almost contagious.
“Idiot,” Dennis mutters and Shun narrows his eyes. “You’re so much trouble. I don’t know why I like you either. So at least the feeling’s mutual.”
“I only put up with you because Ruri asked me to,” Shun says, sitting on the couch.
Dennis laughs and sits next to him. “Same.”
Even so, Dennis leans against his side and Shun takes his coffee back, sipping slowly. He’ll never understand Dennis, and he’s never going to be anything more than an annoying friend of Ruri’s who happens to stay here a lot. Even so, it’s too quiet when he’s not around. There’s something missing when he’s gone.
“So what’s with you and those twins?”
“Oh, you’re so jealous. Don’t worry, Grace just likes my dazzling shows. Besides, the commander was way more my type.”
“What commander?”