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bacon added santas lost elf, screams in dino, mother, galaxy boi, lu, gucci, minnie, KYA, and lay me down to the chat
bacon welcome
bacon you all must be wondering why I’ve gathered you here today
screams in dino minseok why isn't your name capitalized
minnie because i don't want it to be
screams in dino thats not correct
minnie that’s*^
screams in dino fuck off
mother don’t swear
screams in dino why the fuck not
galaxy boi listen to your mother
screams in dino you and your wife can go fuck each other
galaxy boi gladly
mother wait
mother who said i wanted to
galaxy boi so you don't want to
mother i didn't say that
bacon guys
bacon y'all
bacon my dudes
santas lost elf buddy boys
bacon this is why I'm dating you
lu can you tell us why you added us to this chat baek
bacon i was waiting for junmyeon and yifan to finish
galaxy boi we’re done
bacon good
bacon i was gonna continue even if you weren’t
bacon i invited you all here today
bacon so we can all talk
lay me down is that all
gucci we can talk to each other privately
santas lost elf wheres the fun in that
bacon this is why i love you
KYA dont act lovey dovey here
KYA some of us don't have a boyfriend
bacon THAT
bacon is the other reason why you're all here today
minnie oh no
mother i have an idea whats gonna happen
bacon we’re gonna play match maker for TWO
screams in dino two
bacon thats right TWO
bacon TWO lonely souls here in this very chat
santas lost elf this very chat?
bacon thats right THIS very chat
screams in dino they hype each other up thats cute
lu its annoying
bacon the two lonely souls are
bacon LUHAN
lu shit
bacon and JONGIN
bacon these lost and lonely souls
KYA oh so now we’re lost too
bacon lEMME FINISH TALKING SHUT THE FUCK UP
bacon as I was saying
bacon luhan and jongin are very lonely
lu since when
screams in dino since now
bacon and haven't been fucked in a long time
lu who says i like to be the one getting fucked
lay me down guys please
galaxy boi is that really necessary to say here
lu if baek is gonna pair me with someone i need them to know what i like
bacon but you’re boyfriend isn't going to be just ANYONE
bacon its going to be your crushes
KYA nope i need to leave
lu me too
lu im booking a plane ticket to america
lay me down you don't even speak English
lu ill learn
KYA I'm flying across the world nope not today fuckers
minnie jongin dont you wanna fuck kyungsoo
KYA i do!
screams in dino kyungsoo
KYA you need to shut up
lu i mean i wanna date sehun
lu but i dont want baek setting us up
bacon first of all I'm offended
bacon second of all I'm doing it
KYA baek no
gucci hes not gonna respond
lay me down yeah he's probably texting sehun and kyungsoo about how much you guys wanna fuck them
lu chanyeol you’re his boyfriend
KYA YEAH CONTROL YOUR BOYFRIEND
santas lost elf first of all one does not simply “control” baekhyun
santas lost elf and second of all he’ll bite me if i try to take his phone away from him
mother well man up
screams in dino no you don't understand
screams in dino baekhyun can bite softly
screams in dino and he can bite HARD
santas lost elf exactly
santas lost elf last time he bit me i drew blood
gucci you guys are over-reacting
bacon guess what bitches
galaxy boi oh no
bacon i got y'all a date
