Work Text:
The priest collided with the wall. His back made a sickening crack. The sound of snapping jaws and growls filled the room. This isn’t how Hux expected his week to go—though he doubts Ben expected it to go this way either—stuck in an disgusting room with this disgusting man and his disgusting fucking demon. An Exorcism. He knew for a fact that the church didn’t even perform exorcisms anymore.
”Foul demon! You have no domain in this realm”, Hux screamed as he stood back up. He was leaning against to wall to support his weight. For a moment it felt like the room’s pressure changed—everything felt heavier, the room was darker. Hux felt a buzzing between his eyes. He couldn’t see in front of him, he couldn’t hear, he couldn’t smell, couldn’t do anything.
”Why did you let yourself get wrapped up in this Hux? You don’t have to be here? Why are you suffering for him? What is he giving you?”
The sound of the devil’s voice flooded Hux’s senses. Ben—not the devil—it was Ben, his life, his love, his everything. Why was he here? Because he loved Ben, because he wanted to save him, because he couldn’t let Ben go. Because he was stubborn, because Ben was his and no one could have him.
— — — — —
Hux stills remembers when he first laid eyes on Ben. The soon-to-be Priest was sure the choir boy was nothing more than a brooding teenager; but, that was almost five years ago— it’s been five years, they’ve been together for five years—it’s been five years, they’ve been together for five years. Ben could sing a soft deep tenor, sometime low alto if they were low on boys, his presence demanded attention. Hux was always there to give it. Shy but never outspoken; he was strong in his morals, strong in his ideals, strong in the way he carried himself.
His eyes, his hair—raven hair—, his hands, his skin—pale and soft—;he was so beautiful. Perfect, Ben was perfect— an angel amongst men; oh so desirable.
Ben kylo kylo kylo changed. At first it was slow, ignorable, simple things. Some nights he didn’t want to be bothered and other nights he wanted everything Hux couldn’t possibly give him. Ben was more moody and irritable, he didn’t want to be bothered, he didn’t want to see Hux, he didn’t want to see anyone. He cut himself off from his friends, his family, his love.
”Watching beg on your knees for an answer from a God that doesn’t listen. His ears are not deaf; he simply does not listen”,
— — — — —
He wasn’t there. He wasn’t real. This isn’t his body. This isn’t real. This isn’t real. Why? Why? Why? Why is Hux here? Why isn’t Hux responding? Can’t Hux hear him?
— — — — —
Hux felt bile in his mouth and his head was pounding. Slowly he sat up—when did end up back on the floor—and locked eyes with Ben. Yes his Ben, not that monster that demon. Shakily, very shakily, Hux stood; on weak legs—fragile, fragile, fragile— and sat beside Ben. The filthy mattress made a horribly wet noise. Who knows just how many fluids were seeping into his pants. All that mattered was this moment.
”Ben: my love, my life, my everything”, Hux whispered it like a prayer
It went unanswered