Work Text:
Peggy Carter walked with confidence; she always did. A woman in her position had to, but she didn’t mind. Peggy Carter was the embodiment of inner strength. When she wanted something, she put all her effort into getting it, and when she made up her mind, she never faltered.
She had been watching him. At first, she felt bad for the skinny, sickly soldier. If he could barely survive boot camp, he definitely wouldn’t survive the war. She watched him try, fail, and try again. The more she watched, the more he surprised her. He was smart and selfless, and he had a strong soul just like her.
When Dr. Erskine made his decision, Peggy’s heart sunk. Of course, she knew he would pick Steve Rogers. Why wouldn’t he? Erskine saw the same traits in Steve that she did, but the reality of it stung. Then, Peggy Carter made a decision.
She walked past rows and rows of barracks. She nodded as the soldiers she passed saluted her. At first, these burly men would barely look at Peggy, but, after a few days with her busting their chops, they gave her the respect she deserved. Finally, she came to an empty building. Steve Rogers had been given some privacy before his procedure.
She strutted straight up to the door, and, for the first time in a very long time, she faltered. Was this the right decision? After all, she barely knew him. They’d only met a few weeks ago. They’d never had a conversation where the topic wasn’t the war or the military. Hell, they’d never even been on a date. On the other hand, this man was about to put his fate in a scientist’s hands before he even got the chance to live. He could easily die in the process without enjoying any of life’s experiences. She could tell there was one experience he hadn’t enjoyed; he didn’t look at her the way the ones who had did. In his circumstance, it was no wonder, but it still didn’t seem fair.
She lifted her hand to knock but heard voices inside before she did. She pressed her ear to the door and could make out a conversation between Rogers and Erskine. “This wasn’t a good idea.” She decided. She walked back to her room and didn’t sleep.
Dr. Erskine had left an hour ago. Steve paced back and forth. He drew in his notebook. He read. He didn’t sleep. He decided he needed fresh air, so he took a walk. The base was quiet and serene in the middle of the night. Every other soldier was asleep, waiting a bugle that would blow far too early.
He didn’t plan to end up at Agent Carter’s door. From the minute he saw her, he knew she was different. She didn’t look through him or over him like most girls. She saw him, like she was peering right into his soul. Steve couldn’t decide if that was better or worse. He lifted his hand to knock but caught a glimpse of his arm, skinny and frail. “If I don’t die tomorrow, maybe I’ll be worthy of a gal like Peggy Carter.” He thought as he shoved his hands in his pockets and left.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
She sat in the back row of his first performance. He didn’t know she was there, and she kept it that way. It was painful to watch. He was so much braver than any soldier she knew. He deserved better, and yet here he was surrounded by beautiful red, white, and blue clad dancing girls. That last part bothered her more than she would even admit to herself.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Steve finally found Peggy later that afternoon in a secluded room he didn’t know existed until now. She sat at a table covered with files and maps, going over intel. If she needed a distraction, she was at least going to be useful. “Can I sit?” Steve asked. Peggy, annoyed that he had found her, waved a hand. “You do whatever you want.” She said, then under her breath “and whoever.”
Steve perched on the table beside her and sat in awkward silence for more than the acceptable amount of time. The sound of him breathing was getting on Peggy’s last nerve. He kept starting to say something then stopping. This was irritating Peggy too. “If you have something to say, Captain Rogers, just say it.” She finally snapped, but kept her eyes glued to her paperwork.
“Peggy,” Steve took her hand and removed the file from it, “I’m sorry.” She knew the second she looked at his face, where she could still see that sincere skinny boy she first met, she would forgive him. She tried not to; she failed. He looked into her eyes, “You know you’re my best gal.” “And why is that?” She questioned. He paused then simply stated, “You saw me when I was invisible.” They stared into each other’s eyes, inching forward with every heartbeat, and then…
Bucky busted through the door with Howard Stark not far behind. “Captain Rogers.” Bucky remarked with a raised eyebrow. “Agent Carter.” Stark chided. “We were just going over some intel.” Steve tried to cover. “Sure you weren’t fondue-ing?” Howard chuckled and nudged Steve. Peggy rolled her eyes. “Colonel Phillips wants to see us.” Bucky continued, “Might have to take a rain check, you two.” He winked at Peggy and turned to leave. Howard followed him with Steve and Peggy not far behind. Steve reached for Peggy’s hand and held her back from the others for just a second. He pecked her cheek and they continued walking hand-in-hand.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Peggy sat with Steve awhile longer. This was it. They were going after Hydra, and they’d either succeed or die trying. Peggy Carter was no stranger to the casualties of war, especially after losing Bucky, but this mission had a better chance of being a suicide mission than a success. She knew everyone important to her would be in the line of fire, and there was a weight in the pit of her stomach that she just couldn’t shake. She grabbed the bottle and took a swig. It eased her nerves only a little.
Steve smiled as he watched her but then looked down sorrowfully. “Peggy,” he finally said in a serious tone, “stay behind; don’t follow me.” “Like hell I would!” She exclaimed. He looked up at her with a strained face and pain behind his eyes. “Please, I lost… Bucky,” he swallowed, “I don’t want to lose you too.” “Like I said, Captain, that’s not your choice.” She retorted, gentler this time. “Do I get to make any choices, any moves then?” He asked, knowing the answer. “No,” she said simply, “not about who’s going on this mission, that is.” “What’s that supposed to mean?” He scrunched his eyebrows together. “Nevermind.” Peggy sighed and thought “he really doesn’t know anything about wo-”
But, before she could finish that thought, Steve Rogers had leapt from his chair and was leaning over her. He had one hand on the back of her chair, making him uncomfortably close to her face. She could feel her heart beating out of her chest. He brushed a curl out of her eyes and let his thumb linger over her red lips. Peggy closed her eyes but could feel Steve hesitating. “Make your move, Captain.” She reassured with a grin. He pressed his lips into hers like he’d wanted to do for so long.
His hand moved from her face to caress her bare leg. She unbuttoned her trench coat and his uniform jacket and then stood allowing both to fall to the floor. She grabbed his tie and loosened it then unbuttoned his shirt; with one fell swoop, he simply ripped hers off. “Show off.” Peggy groaned. Steve raised his eyebrows, and she immediately regretted calling him a show off. He lifted her by her waist and set her down on the bar. Not to be outdone, she wrapped her legs around him, drew him close, and kissed him. Before she knew it, they were both on the bar. And, while the rest of London and the world sat in fear and darkness, two people found something to live for.