Chapter Text
I’ve never been good with feelings and emotions, probably because I’ve always been taught that a man like me, coming from an old aristocratic family, doesn’t have to show them in public. Or maybe because in my family, showing affection, or anger or any kind of feeling at all was almost prohibited. That was, until my father died.
I felt like a heavy weight was lifted from my shoulders, and suddenly I became aware that he was keeping all of us in a prison. Since he’s gone, we’re all free to show and tell what we think, and I’m sure the bond between my brother and I is growing stronger now than when we were little.
But this unexpected freedom, has brought something else at surface. Something I’m pretty sure was hidden deep inside of me for a long time, but I was too scared to let it come out.
And I’m still scared, but that gives me a sort of thrill and I can’t help myself…I can’t stop looking at a certain person and thinking he’s the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen. Every time I enter the lounge, my eyes immediately go and search for him. If he’s there, then I’m sure my evening, and my night, will be full of good thoughts. If he’s not, the bad mood will remain until I can see him again.
Tonight is even better than usual. We’ve had a little conversation, and he told me that being me was something special…no one, not even my mother, has never said to me that I’m special…and hearing those words coming from him made butterflies explode in my stomach.
We touched, I placed my hand above his when he passed me the glass…and our eyes met. For some seconds we stayed like this and I swear I couldn’t hear anything around me, only the furious beat of my heart.
There was only Adil and I.
But before I could get ridiculous or do or say something inappropriate, Joe O’Hara came along and took him away from me…
And now here I am, sitting in a corner of the room, unable to take my eyes off of Adil.
I know it’s dangerous, if someone would watch me carefully, will have no doubt that I’m actually drooling after the bartender. But I can’t stop. Not even when he catches me staring, and gives me a small smile, making me feel heat from my head to my toes.
There’s no point in denying it now: I’m attracted by Adil Joshi, the barman who works in my hotel’s lounge. There are just few problems: he’s a man, he’s Indian, I’m indirectly his employer…I really can’t see how this could ever work…