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I’m always in a dream.
Always fascinated.
Everything is for you
Just stay with me
This is my happiness.
I always thought that I was living in a dream. Everything about you always made my heart burst with happiness. Especially this day. I looked around my surroundings to ease my nerve. Broken white silk and red dominated the room. “A safe choice and an elegant color,” you said. I chuckled when I remembered we fought about the color we wanted. I knew you did not want to play safe because you loved art, but I myself did not want any outrageous colors or arts when it came to wedding. I had always wanted a simple one. I playfully said I was afraid the color or arts you loved would outshine me in our wedding. “YOU are an art itself, Daesung,” you whispered as you found your way to peck my cheek.
I was smiling ear to ear since I remembered that romantic gesture of yours. When my father touched my hand, I was taken back to reality. Lingering my hands to him, I headed to the altar. Inhale, exhale; I wished the nervousness went away as I breathed out. My eyes were set to the altar.
There you were, standing gorgeously with your broken white tuxedo and red handkerchief peeking from your pocket. Your black orbs were staring at me. The hollow on your cheeks appeared as you smiled to me. I smiled back. The wedding march finally came to an end as I reached the altar. Appa let my hands out. I was then standing beside you.
If we haven’t met
My days were painful and meaningless
I then laid my eyes on you who were standing on my side. Ah, I lost the words to praise you. I took a look at the priest; he was ready to do the service. I grunted, this would not take a long time but I had no patience. I wanted him pronounce us as couple quickly.
Then I giggled to myself.
If we haven’t met, what would the days I lived be? Who was I again before BIGBANG happened? I was nobody, just a high school student who had been cheered by my teacher to be a singer, the teacher whom encouraged me to have an audition. Even when I got in, the staff would call me ‘the ugly one’. Who did not get hurt by that mean words? I wore my smile every day at any occasion; that’s my façade. Jiyong Hyung even scared at me because I always smiled. But then you saw beyond my mask. “You are great, Daesung.” You always mentioned that when I was down. You’re not a man of many words and I knew that. I was not a person who would let someone easily enter my mind, but you crossed the threshold of mine. You would be a jokester when I was sad, you would be a big bear when I needed a hug.
Even if everybody leaves and even if I lose everything.
As long as you’re here I don’t need anything (It’s you)
I can die for you (It’s you)
Even when the world ends
As long as you’re here, it’s all good
When the car accident happened and I shut myself from everyone else, you would sit in front of my door at dorm, knocking and calling my name as long as you could. Even if I did not answer, you would tell me about your day. Until one day, I felt your effort was enough to melt me down so I decided to open my door for you. My face was so swollen because I cried myself out. You then hugged me tightly, saying,”Shh, Daedae. Hyung is here to wash away your fear. Hyung will hug you tightly every day and will not let anyone hurt you.” I was crying louder as you finished your sentence, but I knew I would be at ease from then, feeling that you would be there for me.
I did not know what exactly I was feeling for you at the first time. The I felt safe with you, knowing that I had a shoulder to lean on. Slowly but sure, I felt that you cared for me more than a dongsaeng. Everyone knew you cared for the other members, yet you gave more effort to make me feel good with your lame jokes. “It is not lame, Dae. It’s just take a whole new level of smartness to digest my jokes. I think you are the one who has same frequency with me if it’s about lame jokes. Your jokes is way lamer than mine, Dae!” You playfully pinched my cheek as you said that. I just laughed at your actions and you proceeded to hug me. I was so stunned. You caressed my hair and patted my back. I relaxed at your embrace. “I don’t need anyone else, as long as you are here with me, Dae, it’s all good,” you whispered.
I was snapped back to reality as you tugged the sleeve of my tuxedo and signaled with your eyes that the priest was looking at us.
“Ahem, attention please,” the priest said to silence us.
I mouthed sorry to the priest and you held my hands. Both Jiyong Hyung and Seungri gave ring to each of us.
You looked at me and said your vow, “Meeting you was a destiny, my angel. I, Choi Seunghyun, take you, Kang Daesung, to be my lawfully wedded husband, to have, to hold and to love from this day forward, for better, worse, for richer, poorer, in sickness and health, until the death do us part.”. You took my hand and put the ring on my finger.
Then I smiled at you as I started my vow. “I was born to meet you, and to love you. I, Kang Daesung, take you, Choi Seunghyun, to be my lawfully wedded husband. I promise you to be true in good times and in bad, in sickness and health. I will love you, and honor you all the days of my life.” I took your hand, also put the ring on your finger.
The priest said, “You have declared your consent. May the Lord in his goodness strengthen your consent and fill you both with his blessings. Amen.
“Now I pronounce you, a husband and husband. You may kiss the groom.”
It was destiny that we’ve met that day
Then my future changed
To love you is to protect you, Oh baby
If I had not decided to go to YG, how would we cross our path? I always felt delighted that I decided to take the audition and could meet you. “I am the most blissful here, Dae. I know you are one in a million, no… Billion people out there. You are my destiny. I was born to /meet you and to love you,” you said at that night you kneeled before me. “Will you marry me? I will protect you from the harm of the world.”
I just could not say no. You were my world, you were my future. You were love of my life. The thought of you not being with me in the future never crossed my mind. I always mentioned you when I talked about the future. “It’s always ‘us’ when you talk about future, Dae. Are you sure you want to spend your life with me? Are you not afraid I will be an old man with wrinkles everywhere?” I shook my head.
“Hell naaw, Hyung. I am sure that you are the one. But theen…,” I proceeded to touch your face, “we could inject your face here and there and take you to the best dermatologist in the world just to fade your wrinkles away.” I shrugged on your chest and laugh. You just playfully gave me punch on my shoulder. Then you leaned to steal a peck. I just smiled and cupped your cheek as I wanted a kiss.
I wish the time stops as I hold you
It’s time for our dance. I put my hands on your shoulder and you advanced to take your hands in my waist. You looked at me so lovingly. Our fans might call me an angel, but to me, you were the angel. I could imagine your wings embrace me, make me feel warm. I just wish the time stopped as I held you like this, at the beginning of our new relationship. It felt so splendid that you were here, dancing with me slowly as the music started playing. I could feel the stare of everybody and heard giggles from Jiyong Hyung, Seungri, Youngbae Hyung, and Hyorin Noona. But I did not care. I wanted to feel the moment with you.
Even if everybody leaves and even if I lose everything.
As long as you’re here I don’t need anything (It’s you)
I can die for you (It’s you)
Even when the world ends as long as you’re here, (it’s all good)
It’s you. Even when the world ended, I just needed to hold your hands and felt you were here with me. I was good. I was more than good.
Stay with me forever.
“Stay with me forever, please. Do not even think about parting with me Dae. I don’t know how I will live without you. Please bear with me, Dae. I may not the best for you, but I will try to be the best for you. I promise.”
I don’t need anyone else and even if I lose everything
As long as you’re here I don’t need anything (It’s you)
I can die for you (It’s you)
Even when the world ends as long as you’re here, (it’s all good)
“I just need you Dae. I need you in my life. I will do everything to not to lose you. I could throw away the fame and the money. I need you to be with me forever. As long as you are here beside me, Dae, it’s all good for me.”
It’s you It’s you It’s you
As long as you are here, (it’s all good)
It’s you It’s you It’s you
(It’s all good)
The song came to an end. You were closing the gap between us and leaned to kiss me. Then you put your chin on my shoulder as you whispered,
“Thank you and I love you, Choi Daesung.”