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“All you really have to do is stand there and smile. The kids are here to see Santa. The elves just add to the ambience. If a kid starts crying, give them a candy-cane and send them back to their parents. Easy-peasy.” The nurse said as he ushered Namjoon towards Santa’s throne in the middle of the children’s hospital.
Namjoon arrived at his spot and noticed another elf walking towards him. He was tall with broad shoulders and dark brown hair. His plump lips turned up in a bright smile as he made his way towards Santa’s seat.
“You must be Jin. The two of you will be Santa’s elves tonight. Don’t lock your knees and don’t forget to smile. Have fun!” The nurse said as he walked away.
“Hi! I’m Jin. This is my first time volunteering.” The man spoke, extending his hand to shake. Namjoon shook his hand and introduced himself just as Santa sauntered up to them.
“Hey, sweetheart, make way for Santa!” He said, pushing the two men apart and flopping down into his chair.
Santa’s breath held an air of stale vodka and cheap cigarettes. Namjoon and Jin shared a look of disgust before striding to their places at Santa’s side. It was going to be an interesting night.
After an hour of kids sitting on Santa’s lap and telling him what they wanted for Christmas, it was time for a small break. Santa and his two elves were escorted to an employee breakroom down the hall. Namjoon made his way to the coffee machine and began to pour when he heard Santa’s voice.
“Those elf tights look heavenly on you.” Santa said.
Namjoon turned around in shock. That was wildly inappropriate for a man dressed as Santa. As he turned around, Namjoon saw that Santa’s eyes were trained on Jin’s thighs as drank straight from a silver flask. Jin was doing his best to politely pretend he hadn’t heard as he silently ate a sandwich from the vending machine. After an uncomfortable ten minutes, in which Santa continued to make inappropriate remarks to Jin, another nurse came to escort the three back to their station. Namjoon’s blood boiled as he couldn’t help but notice that Jin’s smile no longer reached his eyes.
The longer Namjoon and Jin stood there, the more daring Santa was getting. In between switching one kid out for the next, Santa would throw out little comments towards Jin. Namjoon could see Jin was increasingly becoming upset. At this point, Jin wouldn’t even look at Santa and he wouldn’t move from his spot, 3 steps out of Santa’s reach, even when Santa told him to get in closer.
What Santa said next would forever seal the legend in Namjoon’s mind. Not only did he say it loud enough for a group of parents and kids to hear, but also for a split second, Namjoon thought Jin was going to punch him.
“This elf has been very naughty tonight. Santa is going to have to punish him with his big candy-cane later. You’d like that, wouldn’t you? Naughty elf.” Santa laughed a boisterous laugh as he smacked Jin’s backside.
Jin’s hand pulled back as though he was about to punch him. However, someone else beat him to it. Santa toppled over backwards with a yelp of pain. For a moment, time stood still as Namjoon surveyed the situation before him. Santa was lying on the ground, hand covering his bleeding nose. Namjoon looked at Jin. Jin looked back at Namjoon in astonishment. Namjoon’s gaze turned slightly to the side as he looked upon his own hand, pulled back into a fist. For a half a second, he could have sworn the room was silent. Perhaps it was from the shock that he had punched Santa. Maybe it had something to do with the way Jin was slightly smirking at him. Either way, the silence instantly dissolved into the shrieks of no less than thirty children.
The next few seconds were complete chaos. Kids were screaming and crying and throwing themselves on the floor. Parents were trying to comfort their children while staring daggers into Namjoon’s soul. Nurses and doctors were rushing around trying to calm the situation. Santa himself was trying his best to stand back up with dignity, his beard dangling and his hat clinging to the side of his head for dear life. Namjoon made eye contact with Jin once again, his face still in shock as the head nurse ran towards them.
“Are you kidding me? You just punched Santa! You’re fired!” The nurse yelled as she tried to help Santa to his feet.
“You can’t fire me! I volunteered! You aren’t even paying me!” Namjoon yelled back.
“Fine! Your services are no longer needed! You’ve just traumatized a group of sick kids!” She yelled, pointing to the door.
Namjoon threw his elf hat down as he stomped his way towards the exit. As the cold, night air hit him, he heard rushed footsteps coming up behind him. He turned around, hoping it wasn’t Santa coming for round two. Instead, he saw Jin, face flushed and laughing.
“You actually punched Santa!” He said as he laughed, falling into stride beside Namjoon.
“He was out of line. The comments he was making at you, and then, to actually put his hands on you? Ugh. I just couldn’t sit quietly and watch it any longer. He needed to be taught a lesson.” Namjoon said, still angry at Santa’s treatment of Jin.
“You defended my honor! You’re like my knight in shining…tinsel!” Jin joked as the two of them continued to walk.
Namjoon and Jin casually strolled into a nearby coffee shop to warm up. Over the next couple of hours, they recounted the look on Santa’s face as he tumbled to the floor, laughing harder each time they pictured it. As the staff politely ushered them from the shop so they could lock up, Jin asked for Namjoon’s number, “just in case the Easter Bunny gets handsy this Spring.”