Chapter Text
It was only cold now, the wracking pain gone. It was so cold. Was it always this cold?
Distantly, there was the sound of blasterfire, of screaming. The droids had moved on from here, deeper into the base. Reinforcements would come—they would, they had to. Injured men—the ones who could stand and fight had taken up arms. There was nothing to be done for the rest of them. Kelly had done what he could… he had tried… he was only bleeding out, now.
“Kelly,” someone cried. There was the sound of them scrambling close, kneeling at his side, saying urgently, “Kelly, Kelly—"
He dragged open his eyes, reluctantly.
“Kyr,” he said raggedly, barely more than a sigh. He looked over the little gunner—and Kelly was sorry that he could think of Kyr like that, and sorry that he would never be able to think of Kyr as anything else, would never see him filled out in his body, never see the shadows under his eyes recede. Kyr looked alright. There was a singed burn on his cheek, blood soaked into his sleeve, but he looked alright. Better than Kelly, ha ha ha. He was sorry that he hadn’t been able to help Kyr, but at least now that failure would never haunt him. But he wished… he had to—he had to tell Kyr—
“I’m sorry,” Kelly rasped. Kyr’s hands were hovering anxiously over the mess Kelly had made of his lower body, and Kelly took one of them in the hand he could still move. “Look at me,” Kelly told Kyr, and swallowed back bile. Don’t look at that. It just hurts. Don’t look at the things that hurt, not when there’s no help for them.
Kyr met Kelly’s eyes; his were wide and wet, his jaw tight, all pale with tension, and Kelly squeezed his hand. There was nothing to be done.
“I’m sorry,” Kelly said again. There was blood in his mouth.
Kyr shushed him. “Don’t talk,” he said quaveringly. “Save your strength.”
Kelly would have laughed if he could have. He swallowed with difficulty and said, “It’s okay.” It hurt to speak, it hurt to breathe. It was okay, though, and he squeezed Kyr’s hand. It was okay. There was nothing to be done now, and he hadn’t been able to help Kyr and it was okay that now Kyr could do nothing for Kelly, and he wanted to tell Kyr that, but it was too late, he was already too far gone, he knew it. He couldn’t feel Kyr’s hand in his.
The pain was buzzing at the edge of his awareness, and the cold was rising up behind his eyes. His vision narrowed and greyed. Where was he—? He couldn’t see. He couldn’t—
“Carver?” Kelly didn’t know if he said it out loud. He tried again, reaching out, searching blindly for the warmth of Carver’s body, Carver, Carver, are you there? Are you…