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The sun shone down on them, bright and warm, the day the rest of the RFA laid their leader to rest.
She stood quietly to one side, watching as, one by one, the members she’d come to love, to see as family, stepped up to the gravestone, offering soft words and sentiments of farewell. Jaehee, solemn and thoughtful, burying a mentor and leader. Jumin, face as calm as she’d always known but with unfathomable pain in his eyes, in the slight tremble to his voice, as he spoke his last words to his best friend. Zen, stricken with grief but pushing through. Yoosung, openly crying, with forgiveness in the wake of the truth.
And Saeyoung, barely out of the hospital but still determined to make the funeral. She moved to stand beside him, fingers weaving between his, as he spoke, quiet words praying for happiness, for selfishness for a life cut tragically short by endless selflessness.
As everyone spoke their final goodbyes to their friend, she bowed her head. She hadn’t had an opportunity to know him as long as the others had, especially Jumin or Saeyoung, but she did know that even when suspicion reigned over his secrets, she had seen his kindness, his acceptance of a perfect stranger. His silence, his desire to protect everyone he cared about. All of that had been real.
She knew that V had been a good man with good intentions, who simply made the wrong choices born out of a true desire to protect those he cared about.
A commotion drew her attention and she looked up just in time to watch Yoosung stumbling away, tear streaks glinting in the afternoon light. Beside her, Saeyoung tensed, and she nodded, giving him a gentle push.
“He needs you.”
Golden eyes, soft with unshed tears of his own, met her gaze before looking away, still hesitant. “I… Zen said to leave him alone. What can I do?”
She stepped closer, reaching her other hand up to cup his cheek. “You can listen, and you know best what happened and what to tell him.” For a moment, she tightened her grip, giving his hand a gentle squeeze. “Go on.”
“And you…?”
She glanced back at the gravestone and the picture placed before it, of a man with a gentle smile and something warm and almost familiar in his expression. “I’ll be here.”
Saeyoung nodded, wrapping an arm around her shoulders and pressing a quick kiss to her forehead. “Thank you. For everything. I’ll be right back.”
She offered him a small smile, the expression feeling almost foreign on her lips after everything that had happened. “I know.”
Still, the space beside her felt too empty when she stepped forward as though compelled, eyes fixed on the spot before her, where V rested. Without thinking, she knelt before the photo and pressed her hands together, vaguely sensing Zen, Jumin, and Jaehee moving away as though to grant her some amount of privacy.
“V…” She paused, the name feeling strangely awkward on her tongue, but she closed her eyes, pushing forward. “Thank you. I didn’t know you as long as the others and much of that time was marred by suspicion but… I will never forget how accepting you were when I first joined. I think we understand now why you did what you did, even if it may not have been the best plan. But I guess it’s too late now to think about that.”
She drew in a shaky breath, blinking against the sudden stinging in her eyes. “Still, I can’t help but wonder… Would things have been different if you told somebody? If we’d known earlier? Would anything have changed if you’d had someone to help you and listen to you?” The words were falling out of her mouth before she had time to give them any thought, almost as if they were drawn out by the serene, patient, look in the photograph. “Would things have been different if I had met you all sooner?”
The final words were quiet, almost a whisper, but something about them seemed to strike a chord in her, bringing with it memories that weren’t hers, of a cabin in the woods and a warm embrace. Of a smile as bright as the sun and warm, radiant happiness. Happiness that was now impossible for him.
It took her another moment to realize that she had bitten down on her lip so hard she’d drawn blood, that her hands were clenched in her lap, nails digging crescents into her palms. Taking a deep breath, she slowly uncurled her hands and bowed her head once more, hardly noticing the hot streaks of tears that slid, unbidden, down her face.
She didn’t move again until a warm hand rested on her shoulder, and she looked up to find Saeyoung at her side. “Are you all right?”
There was grief in his gaze, but more than that, concern and love, a little worse for wear, perhaps, but still brilliant, and her lips curled upward into a small but genuine smile, even as she swiped at her face. “I’m okay. How is Yoosung doing?”
He turned his head and she followed his gaze to find Yoosung leading Rika back towards the car, looking more animated than she had seen since they escaped Magenta. “Healing. Just as we all are. Just as Saeran…”
“Yes.” She took the hand he offered, allowing him to pull her back to her feet, and leaned into his embrace as he wrapped an arm around her waist when her knees threaten to buckle. “We are. And he will. How can he not, when he has so many people cheering for him?”
He chuckled. “That’s true. Positive thinking, yeah?”
“Exactly.” She glanced towards the parking lot, where the rest of the RFA was gathered, waiting for them. “Is it time to go?”
“I think so. We need to get Rika back, at least.”
She nodded, turning back to offer one last look at the grave, her eyes alighting on the name, carved into the smooth stone. Goodbye, Jihyun. I’m sorry.
“Let’s go, then,” Eunbyeol murmured, turning back to her boyfriend and letting him lead her away.