Chapter Text
It’s such a waste, Ragnor thought as he watched Magnus …to so easily fall in love but spend every day wishing to be loved back.
But Ragnor would still listen to Magnus’s heartbreaking stories about the many different dates he’d seen Alec carry to the lounge he worked… about the menacing hickeys stamped on Alec’s neck… and how all the while, even though he’s right there – even if their eyes met - it was as though Alec was looking right through him - as if he was never there.
Back in high school, Ragnor had a few crushes. During university he dated twice and had loads of fun… he’d made memories he’s sure he’ll never forget, but love – after all that, he’s sure those feelings were nothing near love.
And yet, here’s his best friend weeping in front of him carrying around a broken heart saying he’s in love… a love that has him doing nothing but crying and fretting… a love that may be as futile as the Sahara Desert.
Then after one long day of racking his brain to understand the perturbed madness driving his friend into despair Ragnor asked, “If you’re so torn about him ninety nine percent not remembering you, then why not show yourself to him? Get it over with and use that one percent to remind him – to tell him you’re here”.
And as if the answer to the question is all too obvious, the pitiful soul with eyes red as blood helplessly replied, “ninety nine percent you say, that’s a huge chance of rejection”.
“Then if you won’t move forward, why do you insist on still loving him?”
“You’re asking something stupid again, Ragnor”, vexation seething between his teeth.
Ragnor snapped. “How am I being the silly one here when it’s you and your incomprehensible fixation on a love that doesn’t make sense?”, he cursed, finding himself shaking with anger as he moved closer to Magnus who was gathering his belongings to leave. “Tell me, Magnus Bane, how can you love a man you’ve only seen glimpses of? And no, not counting that one time you drooled all over him on the train – how can such a childish fancy, something so fleeting and unsure be counted as love?”
“And what’s wrong with that, uhm?” Magnus very calmly asked in answering, as he unbolted the door and stood in the exit, “be it a chaste kiss or a lewd night or a bony shoulder for a pillow while fast asleep on a train, love has to start from somewhere. Wouldn’t you agree?”
But Ragnor shook his head, “I still don’t understand. Why would you want this kind of love? You’re hurting, aren’t you? Just find someone who will love you back”.
Magnus laughed bitterly. “Do you really think that it’s people who choose who they want to love? Because if you do, then you really don’t understand the first thing about love and its inescapable and persistent madness. Or do you think there’s a switch of some type but I’m being a stubborn prick and don’t want to use it?” And with that, with dried tears he left the room, leaving Ragnor thinking that, if this is love, then surely, he wants no part of it.
But you see, Ragnor -
Love;
It’s a funny thing once it catches up.
It’s like stealing a cookie from the jar… and then, the habit grows like a parasite… and by the time Magnus took notice… Alec, was all he could think about.
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magnus x alec 