Chapter 1: Kumori Glass no Mukou
Chapter Text
"Honoka…" That voice was my favorite melody. Her crimson red hair being swept by the wind was my favorite spectacle. She was my idol; I really admired her, physically, mentally and spiritually. She was cute, beautiful and most of all kind…but tend to not be too honest with herself. I, however, loved all these traits of her personality.
Without even realizing it, you have slowly gained a place in my heart. We spent so much good time together. We were good friends.
Friends… I really loved the sound of that word. I cherished it close to my heart.
Since the first day we met, all I wanted was to somehow get closer to her. That was back when Kotori-chan, Umi-chan and I were struggling against fate to find a way to save our school. I didn't want to admit it but I was desperate. I thought all hope were lost.
That was when I saw and heard her for the first time. She has singing "Aishiteru Banzai" with so much passion and emotions that I was left speechless. Her way of playing the piano, her way of singing…all that was accompanied by her dazzling look.
Since that day, I have insisted—forced you to get to help us—and to join our little team. In the end, I was so happy that she has become one of us. We went from strangers to teammates and friends in a very brief period.
She was very reserved at first, always keeping everything to herself and blatantly lying—acting tsundere—out of either embarrassment or for unknown reasons. I wanted her to open up to the others. I even went as far as to force her sometimes with the intention of curing her shyness and her lack of comfort around the others.
Later on, we became closer. The term "friends" couldn't satisfy me anymore. I know I was selfish but my brain couldn't work sanely anymore. Plus, I had that bad habit of always doing/thinking things just from impulsion without thinking ahead.
One fateful day, I have decided to confess my feeling for her, on the same rooftop we always had practice with the µ's.
The following since was very painful, our eyes glued to the soil. I could have sworn the wind has stopped as to add more into the already awkward situation. I didn't know what to do. I couldn't say anything. She, on the other hand, was confused, embarrassed and maybe disgusted. After all, I would understand. It would be normal if a senpai—of the same gender as you—call for you to the rooftop and confess even though you've only known each others for few months in addition to the fact that you have considered her like a friend/senior and nothing else.
"Maki-chan…" I spoke awkwardly, slowly clearing my throat and lifting my head.
"I… I will think about it… J-just give me a little time…" She said without lifting her face, her cheeks changing from pink to pale. There was no doubt that confusion has replaced her embarrassment.
And with that, she slowly walked toward the exit without any more word. I did the same after being sure that she was already gone. I also made sure to hide that event/accident to even my childhood friends. I was ashamed of myself and didn't want to get lessoned by Umi-chan who would surely spend an hour repeating that my action was "shameless".
The next day, Maki-chan avoided me. Each time our route crossed, she always found a way to flee away. Of course, the other member of µ's started getting concerned. Knowing Nozomi-chan, she must have understood but fortunately has kept her mouth shut. Rin-chan on the other hand—thankfully—was dense enough to not realize and I thanked God for that.
I started to feel emptiness inside of me. I felt guilty. I didn't feel like eating, something unusual. My nights were sleepless, my conscience becoming heavy as I thought about what I have done. It was also starting to become tiring to try to hide my problems to Mom, Dad and Yukiho.
It was as if a transparent glass was placed in front of me, preventing me to reach you. Said glass was becoming more and more misty every passing day.
I couldn't see you anymore. I was scared of the idea of losing you. Oh; please! Please let me look at you. You can even stare at me with accusing eyes but please allow me to see your face again.
I have come to realize how much I loved her. I needed to be by her side. My wish was to wake up beside her every morning, to have lunch together, to spend our last moment together…
Later on, our relationship worsened. With me being the leader of µ's and her as the composer, our relationship remained at that level. I felt lonely, now her voice always seemed so distant and cold as if I was some stranger.
It was as if you were wearing a mask. You did smile but I couldn't feel any warmth from it. You did act coldly. That pained me.
"Honoka-chan, how about we go out to see a movie this week-end?" My childhood friend Minami Kotori has proposed, one day, as she saw how down my moral was. I have still attempted to lay a smile myself but no matter how hard I tried, a sign always escaped my face from time to time.
"Sorry. I already have something planned." I lied with a forced smile. I knew she didn't buy it as she opened her mouth to protest but remained silent before giving a weak smile.
"Don't push yourself too much in that case. Okay?"
With a nod, I stood up and walked out of the classroom.
I was not in the mood. All I wanted was to fix the link between Maki-chan and me.
It was as if the glass between us has turned thicker. I couldn't hear your voice anymore.
That soft and relaxing voice…my favorite melody. I was depraved of it. Oh; please! Let me listen to your voice. You can even insult me but please allow me to hear anything from your innocent mouth.
This damn glass is so getting in my way. I can feel the cold from loneliness taking me away. I want to feel your warmth. I couldn't live like this anymore.
I wanted to cry out…scream… 'I'm going to risk it all! An all-or-nothing!' I shut my conscience up and walked toward the first year's classroom. It was almost empty except for three familiar individuals. Without saying a word, I walked in, my steps heavy andgrabbed the red-head by the arm before dragging her to the music room, leaving a pair of confused girls.
"Jeez! What do you think you're doing, Honoka?" She asked, annoyed as I pushed her in the room and locked the door behind.
I turned to her, my eyes reflecting seriousness. "Maki-chan… No; Maki." I shook my head, dropping the 'chan' honorific as to prove how serious I was. "I am sure of my feelings! I love you and want to spend the rest of my life by your side. And nothing will make me change my mind."
"Honoka…"
"Listen to me!" I interrupted, taking a step closer to her. "You are my star. You gave me hope when I needed it the most. I am honestly in love with you and I can't imagine a future without you. Truth, we are both girls…but I won't let anyone have a word about it."
Silence fell on the room for a good minute before she started laughing. Laughing…that beautiful melody I have missed so much.
"Idiot!" Maki said as she stood up straight, her lips forming a smile. "That's so like you; to say whatever's on your mind without thinking ahead. However, I'm kind of happy to hear these words. The problem is me…" She looked down. "I am a coward and I didn't know what to do. I thought that fleeing should be the best option. I was scared that I would only be a burden and slow you down…"
The red-head turned to the open window of the room, the wind gently brushing her hair.
"The truth is…" She continued, a hand on her chest. "I now realize how idiot I was." Maki closed her eyes for a second, turning in my direction and gave me the best smile she could. It made my heart skip a beat. "I am sorry! If I could go back in time, I would gladly accept your feelings…"
"Then, do it now!" I said, earning a tilt of a head from my soon-to-be-girlfriend. "Maki… I will ask you again. I love you, Maki. Please become my lover, then my fiancée and finally my wife after we graduate from college."
There was a small pause before her smile returned. "Yes… I want to."
I returned the smile, taking a step forward and reaching my hands forward, putting her in a comfortable embrace. "Now that we are going out, how about giving each others cute nicknames? What do you think of Maki-tan?"
"Please no." She said, both embarrassed and happy. "Just remain the Honoka I have come to love." Her face turned crimson red at her own words. It was a very cute spectacle. At least, until she pushed me and became the usual tsundere she was. "A-anyway, I think we should get going now. It's getting late and we also need to explain few things to Rin and Hanayo."
I just giggled, my beloved Maki was back. I was happy. "Hai hai~"
Chapter 2: Hikari aru basho e
Chapter Text
Why is it I am still dreaming?
In these dark times, for someone like me, staying alive itself is a tough thing. I was a witch in the modern times. My existence itself was seen as a bother for everyone else since machines has taken over nature. Everywhere I went to, my presence was unwelcomed.
Why am I still alive?
I started losing faith in life. I wanted this pain to end. That was when I met her.
It was a cold winter day and I was, like usual, playing at the lake. That place was always deserted so I could use my power without fearing anyone might find out. My magic allowed me to control weather so I was just making a certain area rain while another one was warm.
While I was engrossed with that, I have failed to realize that someone was slowly walking toward said place. I only realized it very late but instead of fleeing like every time someone was coming near, I didn't feel scared at all, seeing that young girl and her big amethyst eyes watching at me with admiration. She had bright red hair and by her clothes was a townsgirl.
"Wow! Is that magic?"
I quickly hid behind a tree, scared but slowly peeked my head out of the hiding spot and nodded. "I am Honoka… the last witch."
"Last witch?" She gave a tilt of the head. "I have read in some book that most witches were killed during the last war. All I know is that if there were survivors, they will be very few but to the point that only one has survived…" She then stopped after realizing that I was giving her a weird look and she cleared her throat. "I'm Maki. I have been squatting the library for years as to do research about magic."
"Oh…" I walked out of the hiding spot and approached her. She avoided eye contact, making me more curious. The more I leaned closer, the cutter her expressions would become. I then tried clinging to her, making her blush like a tomato and I found that very fun.
Since that day on, the two of us would occasionally meet. She will tell me about what she learned and I will show her my power. That was the first time in my life I felt happy to be alive.
Though… it's only like a dream.
Now, I was in a dark place, alone. I knew since the start we won't be together for long. Yet, I still spent my days with her. I fell in love with her and was hurt by our separation. She was from the town so of course they had to move on. I, on the other hand, was a nomad.
The only thing I have to remember her was that yellow ribbon she has offered me. It was back when the two of us went to a nearby town. Fortunately, it was a neutral and poor town so no one found us suspicious. We just happened to be passing by a shop and she saw it. She bought a pair that did match and gave me one while she herself wore the other one.
I'm cold…
After our separation, I had to flee the army who was after my power. It was very hard. I got myself in a deep problem. Though, I didn't want to renounce onto life. I still wanted to meet Maki once again. We promised to meet back at that lake someday. That was the last words we shared before parting away.
Even if the world wishes to separate us, I will be at that place waiting for you.
However, I was weak and I didn't have any ally. Inside a dark forest as the rain was pouring down on me, I have realized I won't be able to make it. After crying, I turned to the sky and prayed so that Maki will be happy. I apologized for not being able to protect our promise and fused with nature. I rather became a tree instead of getting captured. Since that day, I watched over the other plants and animals living in that forest and sometimes helped the humans who got lost there.
Even if the sky is dark, even though I will never see sunshine once again from that spot I will be staying at for the eternity, I am happy because I know that Maki is somewhere out there, alive.
One day, I dreamed about out time together and for weird reason, I felt my roots moving and my tree self getting teleported to the lake where Maki and I once met. It hasn't changed at all. It was still deserted. The only thing that surprised me though was a certain young red-haired woman clad in a white summer dress who was playing with the water. She was surprised at the sudden appearance of my tree self and slowly approached. After hesitating for a second, she finally placed her hand on the branch and closed her eyes.
"Honoka…"
"Maki…" I knew she couldn't hear me but I knew she was happy. The knowledge alone was enough for me to feel happy as well.
She smiled and chuckled before a tear ran on her cheeks. "Thank you for waiting for me."
These were her last words before she turned on her heels and started walking away. If I still had a human appearance, I would have surely smiled as well. "I'm glad you came Maki… be happy."
My lifespan is very long. I spend my days looking over the population of this forest. Even though all these events happened 200 years ago and I knew Maki was no more, I could never forget her warmth. For, I knew, she was the love of my life.
Someday, yes, someday, I know we'll meet again… in a place where the light exist… like they say it in a far eastern language "futai de mata itsuka aou… hikari aru basho e."
Chapter 3: Nakimushi
Chapter Text
"Because I'm a weakling…"
I don't want that anymore…
Graduation day was not far anymore; the day where our path will be separated from our senior's. Us second years will become seniors ourselves when the third year will move on to college. One of these seniors, Honoka, she was important to me, always helping me during these past years we knew each others. She was strong and I was sure she won't have any difficulty, even far from me.
"Your smile is the most beautiful things I've already seen." These were her words back in spring after we disbanded our idol group. I have cherished that phrase of hers; keeping it in my heart so I could tell her that back when I'll gather enough courage. That day never came though as I have always remained a coward.
We were friends. Though, we were close, I always wanted more. Unfortunately, I never dared taking the first step. I was always like that. It's as our senior Niko-chan has once said; "You are a real tsundere, Maki-chan. Why can't you put your pride at the side for once and honestly express your true feelings for Honoka."
That day, I was visiting Niko-chan at her college. The two of us were seated on a bench in the front courtyard, glancing at the passer-by while an awkward atmosphere fell down on us. I came there to ask her opinion since she was the person I trusted the most after Honoka. "…because I'm scared…"
"Scared of what?" She asked, never making eye contact as her gaze was glued to the group of children playing at the park. "If you never tell her, it might be too late. I mean, aren't you tired of watching her from behind."
"I am…" I looked down at these words. I knew I couldn't just approach her out of blue and declare everything on my heart. That was unlike me, something I envied Honoka. She was courageous and sometimes fearless, always ready to do and express things. That was what I loved most about her. "I want to walk beside her instead of always looking from behind…"
Niko-chan sighed as she stood up and took her bag. Turning her back to me, she paused an instant. "Let me just tell you one thing: changes only starts from oneself. There's nothing I can help you with if you don't want to. It only depends on you." And with that, she walked away.
That night, after taking a bath, I opened the window in my room and sat by it, looking at the dark sky. The wind was stroking, allowing my mind to travel around the real reasons why I was myself. Every time something came to my mind though, the image of Honoka always appeared. I remembered our first meeting; not the most romantic one, but it was destiny. I didn't really believe in such thing at first but when your senior can make the rain stop just by shooting at it, it is kind of hard to keep an all-logical mind.
I couldn't sleep at all that night as the idea of parting away with her without telling my real feelings was haunting me. The truth is… it's annoying me… the thought of being this weak.
Every time I think about you… I turned in my sleep as to have a look at the bedside clock. It was already past midnight but I didn't feel sleepy at all. My heart was beating like crazy. I can't help these feelings for appearing again. It kind of makes me want to cry.
I couldn't get any sleep done. I spent the night thinking about anything and nothing. I even had the chance to assist dawn and the raising sun through the window. Seeing that once again made me remember that time when the µ's went at the beach house and we had the occasion to see that rising sun together. I have remembered how Nozomi could see through me. She instantly realized my feelings for our leader and we had a little talk about being honest the night following these events.
"Because I'm a crybaby…" That's what I have replied. "…and it pains me."
Our relationship remained as it was. You were the leader and I was the compositor since I never got the courage to take the step. Even with Nozomi and Niko-chan pushing me forward, I never dared to do it.
"Your smile is really beautiful, Honoka." I have never dared to say these words. I so wished I had more courage. True, being by her side, smiling and laughing like we always used to do, was enough for me. Or at least, that was what I thought. The truth is… I wanted us to be even closer."You truly are a strong and kind person. That's what I love about you."
"As if…" I sighed, my face turning hot at the thought of confessing like that.
Turning once again, I saw that it was raining outside. It was winter, yet it was raining. I pushed the cover aside and stood up to slide the curtains open. The outside was still a little dark since it was still barely six in the morning. Watching such rain fall reminded me of that time when I forgot my umbrella back in summer. Despite being a second year, I was still careless. Fortunately, Honoka was there and proposed to share her umbrella with me. I was a little embarrassed at first but she insisted and I finally accepted. "Fine! I guess I don't have choice."
I truly am a tsundere. Blowing at the window, I drew a smiley on it and couldn't help but to smile to myself. Another season… It is almost spring already. It's already feeling a little warmer during the days. I hope Honoka will still occasionally visit us even when she'll be in college. We'll eat sandwiches once again while doing a picnic and I will sing a lullaby while she sleeps on my lap. I will surely pretend that I don't like that but deep inside, that's what I want the most right now.
I closed my eyes and remembered our little 'date' like she insisted. She has invited me to some grassy hill back in summer so we could picnic. I, at first thought she has also invited her childhood friend but to my biggest surprise, there was only the two of us.
"Every time I look into the sky… I realize how small we are." Honoka has said that day as her head was resting on my lap. We were atop a grassy hill, at the shadow of a tree, the wind gently stroking our faces and the white summer dresses we wore we making us feel comfortable. "It kind of makes me lonely… It kind of makes me want to cry."
That day, I didn't know how to respond. I wanted to comfort her, but I didn't have the words. No, you are a strong person. You are not alone. I am here and I will be beside you as long as you'll accept me, Honoka.
I shook my head as I heard some ringing. It was the alarm clock. Today was the third year's graduation day. After letting go of a sigh, I ran at the bathroom, washed my face, brushed my teeth and changed into my school uniform.
The ceremony didn't last for long. With the third years having to comfort their juniors, Honoka had lot of job as former president of the student council. Talking about her, the two of us were alone in the student council room. After all, I was the new president now so she was giving me few advices for the job.
We talked seriously for a while but I found that boring. After a good minute, I finally sighed while walking over to the window. She walked beside me and leaned against said window, gazing at the horizon. The cheery blossom flowers were already full of life, decorating the scenery and the gentle breeze was adding more nostalgia to the already bittersweet event.
"Because I'm a crybaby… it pains me." She suddenly said out of sudden and I turned to her to see her face soaked in tears. Since when did she cry but I didn't realize. I unconsciously stepped closer to her and took her in a hug, surprising myself. "There are so much things I want to tell you right now, Maki-chan."
"Something about the job of being the president of the student council?" I asked before slightly backing so I could see her beautiful face. I whipped a tear with my thumb and gave a reassuring smile. "Do not worry about that. Hanayo and Rin will be there to help me whenever there will be a problem."
There was a brief moment of silence before Honoka looked down, her lips forming a sad smile. "You truly are dense, aren't you?"
"?" I was surprised by her words.
"You haven't realized my feelings yet. I have tried to let you know that for a while now but you're as obvious as Umi-chan, aren't you?" She continued while lifting her head so our eyes were meeting. She was shorter than me but I could feel her imposing emerald eyes digging right into my soul.
What was she talking about? Could it be that I…
"Jeez!" She pouted. "I won't say it but I will let you decide." The shorter girl continued before escaping my embrace and turned her back to me. "I just have one last request. When I will be in college, I might visit you from time to time so please acknowledge me when the time will come. Okay?"
These were the last words she said before reverting back into serious matter. In the end, the day ended without I could fully understand what she meant. No; the truth is that I didn't have the courage to admit that I could understand what she said. Honoka was in love with me, just like how I was in love with her but I was too much of a coward.
And with that, the former third years moved on and so did we. Days passed, weeks passed, months passed, seasons passed. We were now winter once again and I was preparing for my graduation. It was already decided that Yukiho and Arisa will be the next president and vice-president of the student council. That day, we were tidying little stuff while the two of them suddenly started talking about a romance movie that was popular. Hearing about that reminded me once again how pathetic I was.
That night, I couldn't sleep while thinking once again about my regrets in life. However, as I was about to stand up and to have a glass of water, something tapped against the room's window. I walked over and moved the curtains to see a familiar figure standing in the cold outside. I quickly opened the window. "Honoka? What are you doing here? It's cold outside, you know. Come on, get inside."
I ran downstairs and opened the front door to see her standing there, clothes covered with snow and her hands on her knees. She was breathing heavily and was sweating, presumably after running.
"Honoka?"
"Maki-chan!" She breathed out before jumping at me. "You're so warm~" She coed, surprising me.
"Anyway, let us get inside first."
She shook her head and released the hug. "I need to tell you something first. I ran my way from the Homura shop to here to do something I should have already done one year ago." I was surprised by her words but just nodded and allowed her to release the bomb. "I had a very sad dream. I am scared of losing you. You taught me so many things. I love you, Maki-chan. The idea of us parting away is scaring me so much. Please do not go study aboard. I know I'm being selfish but I realize how stupid I was for being a coward." She sniffed as tears started running her cheeks.
"Honoka…" There was a moment of pause until I realized that I was also crying. I approached her and grabbed her cold hands with mine as to comfort them. "You know I am weak. I lie to myself and the others because I am scared what might happen otherwise. I know how you feel. Sorry for always making you wait. I understand now. I also love you." And then, I leaned closer and captured her lips with mine. The kiss did only last a couple of second before I backed away as to watch her blushing face, something that rarely occurred. I smiled. "I don't want to lie anymore. For you, I will become a lot more, a lot stronger so I could protect you. So, please just wait a little longer. I am yours and you are mine."
"Maki-chan…" Her face lit up before she tackled me once again and rubbed her cheeks against mine. "Thank you for always taking care of me.
Chapter 4: Christmas Love
Chapter Text
It's a Christmas love; you and me… the two of us only.
I was surprised at first when Maki-chan came into our house. I was usually the one who came other at the Nishikino manor but she said she had something really important to say. We were going out for a while and both our families knew about it since we've already introduced each others. Our mothers were easy to convince but our fathers was another story.
After all, I can't blame them. Their princesses were now adults and it was hard for them to accept that. Well, aren't all fathers very protective of their daughters?
In the end though, everyone accepted it, not minding the fact that we were both girls. After all, it wasn't as if humanity will get extinct if two individuals decide the path where they will never be able to have children and since homosexual relationship was more or less tolerated, why not?
"Honoka…" My girlfriend has gone upstairs in my room first since I still had to do something at the shop. I soon joined her though after Mom told me that it was a bad habit to have a maiden wait. "I have something to tell you…" She slightly looked down, her cheeks slightly turning pink. "It's that Christmas is near so…"
I just smiled before patting her head. She was really cute while trying to be courageous like this but always fails because of embarrassment. "Of course!" I said energetically before placing my hands on her cheeks and lifted her head so I could rest my forehead against hers. I could feel her temperature rising as her face turned bright red.
Maki-chan has become more open since the two of us has started going out. There was still a long way though before she could be 100% honest but I was determined of always being there as to help her. She was my girlfriend after all.
"W-well…" She attempted to back away but I didn't allow her to as I tackled her on the tatami floor. "H-Honoka?!"
"Maki-chan~"
"Jeez!" The taller girl sighed as she started to give up. By that point, I was rubbing my own cheeks against hers, enjoying the soft feeling from the embrace. It was in winter and snow was falling outside so hugging Maki-chan like that was heaven for me. "A-anyway, I heard at the TV that there will be a big Christmas tree at the mall so I was thinking that we could go have a look…" Her voice slowly died down by each word she said but I was still happy.
My smile turned into a goofy grin as I got into my knees, backing and allowing her to sit up. "Of course! We could then have a romantic ride on a ferry~"
And then, the now literally red-head jumped at me, attempting to punch me but her hits were held down, meaning I couldn't feel anything. "Jeez! That's embarrassing so please stop." She said, hiding her face in my chest. "A-anyway, I will be grabbing you here tomorrow at 07:00 PM. We will have diner at Dad's friend's restaurant."
"Okie dokie!"
And just as promised, Maki-chan did grab me at 07:00 PM the next day, a Christmas night. It was slightly snowing, giving a romantic ambiance.
It's a Christmas love; you and me… the two of us. With the town's light illuminating our path like stars in the sky; the one we wished upon, we held hands and walked forward.
"Maki-chan~" I leaned closer to her. The two of us were already holding hand but I decided to cuddle as much as I could. Since my girlfriend was taller than me, it was a lot easier to lean against her. "Let's kiss."
"Say what?!" The red-head was surprised, almost screaming. We were walking the sidewalk. Other couples were also walking said path, going to whatever place they have planned to spend the night at. There was all kind of couples doing all kind of thing. Most of them were straight couple who were either holding hand or watching through the shops' windows but there were also gay and lesbian couples. Well, I was a little surprised to see so much of them being this open but it made me happy and had me want to share as much skinship with Maki-chan as possible. "But there are so many people here."
"?" I tilted my head, pretending to be obvious. I however, quickly realized that her reply just came of the fact she thought it was embarrassing to do it in front of that many people but not because we were both girls or because it was just embarrassing. "So, shall we find a quieter place?"
"Idiot." Maki-chan muttered before leading the way, never letting go of me as the two of us continued to walk in the direction of the mall. A smile appeared on my face but then she took me by surprise by giving me a quick peek on the forehead, her face red. "It was just an exception since tonight is…"
"Maki-chan…"
I want to hug you all night long; offer your heart to me so I could do the same for you.
"This town just smells like romance." I said out of blue, earning a surprised look from my girlfriend before she started to chuckle.
"Silly Honoka! Does that even make any sense?"
"Hein?!" I pouted.
Not long after, we arrived at a clearer spot; the park. Passing through said park was the fastest way to arrive at the mall so we agreed to have a romantic walk there. Other couples were busy either watching the stars or having an evening picnic and that made me want to also have one but I knew Maki-chan has already organized our diner. After all, she was a perfectionist so I trusted her in the domain.
Looking up at the sky, the stars were beautiful. I couldn't help but to cuddle even more with my girlfriend, both of us forgetting about the cold weather by sharing our body temperature. I have deliberately forgotten to bring a scarf so the two of us was sharing the white scarf with print tomatoes that Maki-chan has brought. It was so comfortable.
"Look; Maki-chan! It's a shooting star!" I said energetically, pointing at the sky with my left hand since the right one was busy holding my girlfriend's. She just smiled while looking up and I turned to her. "My wish is for us to spend lot of time together like this. What about Maki-chan's?"
She was quiet for an instant before chuckling. "I can't tell you or it won't come true."
"Hein?" I started to pout. "Maki-chan is a meanie."
However, before I could do anything, the taller girl slightly leaned closer to my ear and whispered something that made me both smile and blush.
"Silly Maki-chan~ Of course the two of us will always be together." I said with a big smile on my face. "I will become your wife and you will become my wife and we will be wife and wife after all~"
Maki-chan just smiled at these words, her cheeks turning pink. "You better grant that promise or I will never forgive you in that case."
"Aye aye!"
You're in my heart. I don't want to give up on this love. I don't want anyone but you; you are the only one for me.
"Maki-chaaan~" The two of us arrived at the exit of the park and started to see the mall not far from there. I have decided that it was time for me to get spoiled a little. "Tell me you love me~"
"Why all of the sudden?"
"Jeez! No asking; just tell me."
She sighed before leaning down. "I love you, Honoka." She said, looking at my eyes before her face turned tomato red. I swear; if I was challenged about counting how many times my girlfriend blushed during a date and they will give me a coin for each time, the two of us would be very rich at that instant. "Now, give me the reason." She inquired before turning her gaze back on the path since we were still walking.
"Hehe." I chuckled. "I just fell happier when you tell me these words. It's as if a were powerful force get born inside of me, telling me that nothing will be impossible as long as I'm with Maki-chan."
"Silly Honoka…" She said before whispering, "but I still love you despite that…" I just barely heard her words but I knew she was being sincere even though I didn't know what she said so I gave her a very bright smile, standing on my tiptoes as to kiss her left cheek.
"The fact of knowing that if the best present Maki-chan can give Honoka."
The red-head just smiled as she moved her left arm as to wrap it around my waist and held me closer against her body.
It's a Christmas love; you and me… the two of us. With the town's light illuminating our path like stars in the sky; the one we wished upon, we held hands and walked forward. With the kiss we shared for the night, I felt the inside of my chest warming up. I know you are the one for me and I know that you know that I'm the one for you.
I want to hug you all night long; offer your heart to me so I could do the same for you.
"This town just smells like romance." I said out of blue, earning a surprised look from my girlfriend before she started to chuckle.
"Silly Honoka! Does that even make any sense?" She replied, giving me an impression of déjà vu. "It's the second time you said that tonight."
"Hehe." I just rubbed the back of my head.
Not long after, we arrived at said mall. It was a very large place where lovers like family members were enjoying their Christmas night. Just like Maki-chan has said, there was a very large Christmas tree standing at the center of that spectacle. It was decorated with all kind of light.
"It's so beautiful!"
"Deshou?" She smiled at me before starting to walk again. The two of us was still sharing the same scarf and were still holding hands so we wouldn't have to fear about being parted from each others because there was a very large crowd of people gathered at the place. "Let us have a look at the stuffs in the rear department? I heard from Nozomi that there will be very cute plush and pillows so…"
"Aye aye!" I just nodded, smiling at Maki-chan's genki moment. I rarely saw her this excited so I treasured these moments. "I want a bread pillow and a tomato plush."
Just being able to be alive to feel this… I want to smile with you, cry with you, sing with you. I want to dedicate this love to you.
After getting the cute pillows from the stores, the two of us finally exited the mall. It was already 09:00 by that time so the two of us called for a taxi so they could drop us at the restaurant we were supposed to be having diner at. As soon as we arrived there, we were greeted by few people working for the Nishikino and so entrusted them the stuffs so we won't have to bring them everywhere with us. After excusing themselves, Maki-chan told them to rest for the rest of the night and to take a break for the following day and they were more than happy to accept.
The owner of the restaurant has already readied a table for us and we had the most romantic dinner I could think of.
With that white spectacle outside and my beloved Maki-chan by me side, I couldn't ask for a better Christmas. Let us always stay together. Please hear my wish and help me grant them.
After we were done eating, the two of us left the restaurant after thanking everyone working there. The two of us has decided to walk our way back and enjoy the rest of the night. It was too late for a ferry ride, unfortunately but I was not unhappy. I felt complete.
"Say, Maki-chan." I started as the two of us passed by the park. Other couples were still around but not as many as earlier. "Let us have a sleepover."
She just smiled before leaning down and gave me another kiss on the forehead. "You already know the answer.
It's a Christmas love; you and me… the two of us. With the town's light illuminating our path like stars in the sky; the one we wished upon, we held hands and walked forward.
"This town just smells like romance."
"Silly Honoka! Does that even make any sense?"
The two of us broke in laugher after that.
I want to hug you all night long; offer your heart to me so I could do the same for you.
"Maki-chan; let's kiss!"
The reply just came in form of a chuckle before she grabbed me by the waist and turned me over so we were facing each others. She gently leaned in until our lips met, ignoring the gaze we were getting from the passer-by.
I want to hug you all night long; offer your heart to me so I could do the same for you.
Love, Love, Love, Love, Love, Love, Love… It's a Christmas love.
Chapter 5: Sotsugiyou Memory Sayonara Anata
Chapter Text
Because you were there, I enjoyed going to school. You brought a new colorful light into my dull monochrome destiny.
I sighed, blowing warm breath at my cold hands. It was cold, snowing and I was standing in front of Otonokizaka's main building. Other students were walking toward the auditorium. After all, it was a special day. It was graduation's day. It might as well be the last occasion for few juniors to talk with their seniors who were planning to study far away.
It wasn't snowing that day but the wind was occasionally blowing, making the weather worse. That day, I have attached my hair in a side ponytail with the yellow ribbon that a certain senior has gifted me months prior. It all happened back in summer when Honoka has asked me to give her some piano lesson. I have reluctantly agreed after several attempt of her to convince me and she gave me her favorite ribbon as a thanks.
I very rarely wore my hair in a different hairstyle and usually just let Honoka's ribbon on my desk at home… but since it was a special day; I have decided to make an exception.
You make me want to move faster. You taught me how to enjoy life.
Thinking back about it, I was always a very reserved person, not even bothering trying to make friend. That was until she has started getting in my life. I was annoyed at first that she was attempting so hard to have me open up more… but the more I shoved her aside, she would go back at full force and would drag me forward. Without me being able to realize it, I already made friends and has gotten closer to Honoka than what I even expected to.
Days passed, weeks passed, months passed… After a while, I have started to feel weird each time she would hold me or have her face close to mine. I felt at pain whenever she was being very close to someone else and just being by her side was making me happy. "What's wrong with me?"
In the end, I have decided to ask Mama about it and the reply came in form of a chuckle. I was very confused for a while until she regained her composure and smiled at me. "To think that my dear Maki is in love… that really surprised me. But I guess you can't stay a baby forever. You have to see this vast world with your own eyes."
I was in love with Honoka. I trusted Mama more than anyone else. If she said so then I couldn't deny. I sure would have never accepted that aloud but deep inside, I knew that was true. I just kept these feelings to myself though.
However, it turned out very hard as the gingerhead was unconsciously making a big mess out of me. Every time we met, she would find a way to make me smile. "What is this? I don't get it."
I was brought back into reality as another wind blew and I started moving forward into the auditorium. After finding a seat, I took it and waited until the ceremony started. It did move most of the other students in tear but I managed to keep a calm image. After handing their diplomas to the third year, the students were dismissed and most of them either walk in their classroom to say goodbye or to the courtyard. I, for myself, went to the rear garden.
I saw the figure of several third years student but I was able to guess who Honoka was just by the first glance. She was letting her hair down and was gazing at the large tree where they usually spent their lunch break at. By 'they', I meant her two childhood friends and herself. I remembered that they have invited me along several times and I turned them down, only for Honoka to insist, always ending with me joining them.
I walked in her direction and she turned to face me just as I was about two meters from her. The senior smiled widely. "Maki-chan!" Without a summation, she jumped in my direction and took me in a hug.
"Whoa… Honoka?!" I was taken by surprise and was barely able to catch her in time so that the two of us wouldn't fall. "What was that all of the sudden.
No reply came in as the ginger girl just buried her face in my chest, making my face turn hotter. "Let us find a calmer place." She said, her voice muffled by the material composing the dark jacket I was wearing.
I didn't feel like staying too much in such crowded place so I nodded and started walking toward the school building. Honoka kept close to me, linking our arms and looked down as to not allow me to see her face. Fortunately, it only took us a couple of minute before finding a quiet place; the music room. It was by far my favorite area in this school, mostly because it was quiet most of the time, allowing me to play with a serene mind…and also because it was where I met the airhead senior for the first time.
"So…" I started as the two of us got inside. Before I could do anything though, Honoka quickly locked the door behind and pushed me on the bench in front of the piano. "Hey! What was that for?"
As I looked up to see her face, I was left motionless. Tears were running her cheeks. "Let's play!" She said in a slightly commanding voice, surprising me as she never used that tone before. "Let's play a happy song, Maki-chan." She said before her voice lowered down and took seat beside me.
I was unable to reply to that and followed her order as the two of us started playing with the piano keys. She was the one leading and I was playing the chords. The first song she has decided to play was the instrumental version of that song I was singing when we first met; Aishiteru Banzai.
"What's gotten into Honoka? Why all of the sudden?"
After we completed the song, Honoka finally whipped her tears and leaned against me. "Thank you for playing with me." She said and I was unable to reply, still confused but my hands moved on their own to pat her head. I was not a genius or a very obvious person but at least I knew that something was going on and my senior was sad. "You know, now that I think about it… I feel even sadder."
"What do you mean?"
A sigh escaped her lips. "I always told myself that it was just graduation and everything will be fine but," she readjusted our position as she lay down and was now resting her head on my lap. It took me by surprise but I didn't say anything, opting to just continue stroking her bangs. "Now that I think about it… today is the last day we'll see each others, right?"
My heart instantly fell. I already knew that but decided to just keep that thought at the back of my mind. Honoka was accepted at an all-girl University in Nagiita. It was her fourth and last choice since she couldn't get into her first choice in Tokyo or the second one in Kyoto or even the third one in Numazu. Since Nagiita was very far and had a colder weather most of the time, Honoka won't be able to get back to Tokyo until summer holiday the next year.
However, the next year, I would be a third year and will be graduating in spring. My future was already planned ahead. I will have to go study overseas the week after graduating and will only be able to come 8 years later. Then, my chances of meeting Honoka again were very slim.
"I will be departing tomorrow." The ginger spoke again as to bring me back into reality. "I am already done with the preparation." She sighed. "Mom and Dad are very sad and so is Yukiho but it can't be helped. I can't say no anymore. If only I have studied harder like Umi-chan has said…"
"There's no use thinking back about the past." I cut her despite sadness drowning the inside of my soul. "That's too sudden… So, this is it? We're going to part before I could be able to confess my feelings? But I guess it is better this way. Telling her would only make our separation more painful."
My everyday life was always dull. You brought lot of excitation and joy in the empty shell I was.
Honoka whipped the remaining tears off her face as she forced a smile. "Anyway, let us stop there with that talk!" She attempted to cheer. "Since it's the last time, let us send it to our heart's content!"
"What do you mean?"
Instead of replying with words, the shorter girl jumped on her feet and started dragging me out of the school building, running and ignoring the people who were calling for her. She didn't stop until the two of us arrived at some park I was never at before.
"What… is this place…?" I asked in between heavy breaths.
"I don't know." She carelessly replied before grabbing my hand once again. "And I don't really care. Let us have a date, Maki-chan!"
"D-d-d-d-d-date?!"
She just nodded. "Let's grab some sandwiches somewhere and eat here."
The remaining of the day passed like a flash. The two of us just enjoyed the day without caring of anything else. Now, watching as the sun was settling at the horizon, I suddenly felt sad, realizing that it was the last moment the two of us spent together. "Why? Why is it we can't be together?"
Honoka suddenly leaned against me though. The two of us were seated on a grassy hill, resting against a tree. No one was seen at the horizon, as if the world has made an exception to allow the two of us to get some time alone together. "Maki-chan~"
"What is it, Honoka?"
There was a moment of pause until Honoka shook her head. "No. It's nothing." She said before letting go of a quiet sigh as if she has decided to give up on telling something. I didn't know what she was thinking but I did know she has decided to keep quiet for some reason.
One hour later, we walked back home, hand in hand, until arriving at a bus stop and had to part. She got in one of the bus and waved back at me until said vehicle disappeared at an intersection. I just remained there, standing while waving at the deserted town, a pained smile on my face. One second passed… then, two seconds, then three… Tears started to form in my eyes as I realized it was the end. I was never going to meet my energetic airhead senior anymore. I started crying over the fact the fate was cruel but we can't deny it.
I started walking back home after whipping the tears on my face, heart heavy with regrets and grief.
You gave me a reason to move forward. You taught me how to enjoy life. Now, as your figure was disappearing at the horizon, I can't stop these tears from overflowing.
No… I don't want you to walk away. I am so sad and lonely. If only our destinies were more intertwined…
I want us to be together. I can't say it. All I can do is to watch you from afar and wish you have a better future with someone better than me.
…
A soft sigh escaped my lips as I walked the busy town of Tokyo. I was back in Japan after a decade overseas but won't be able to stay too long. Due to certain circumstances, I was now living in Europe and was working as a doctor at a hospital affiliated with the Nishikino. I just barely found some time to go back to my homeland and to visit that town I haven't seen for years.
Everything has changed. I was scared I might get lost but no matter what, I wanted to walk.
After a good minute, I finally found the place I was looking for. Gazing up to see the now very large building behind the high gate and fences, a nostalgic feeling was born in my chest. "This is… Otonokizaka?" I muttered, remembering how our picturesque school has turned from back then to this massive academy.
Several girls were walking around the courtyard, clad in a new design of uniform, different from what we wore back then. Well, that was 10 years earlier so it was only normal.
After grabbing my hand mirror, I slightly fixed my hair. It was now longer and I kept the sidetail despite it looking too childish for someone my age. The yellow ribbon was a contrast to my appearance, something that lot of people has pointed, but I refused to drop that memento given to me by my first love.
"Ok!" I nodded before putting the mirror back on my pocket and started walking in another direction. I just hopped that my memory was right and I would be able to find the second place I was looking for. Fortunately, I managed to find it without that much problem. I smiled at the Japanese-style shop. "The Homura shop…"
Pushing the door open, my nose was greeted with a familiar scent of freshly baked sweet and a couple of women talking behind the counter. The red-head quickly turned to me though as she saw and gave a polite bow. "Welcome to the Homura shop! May I help you?"
The blonde beside her also gave a polite bow. I wasn't that confident in my memory but if I remembered right, these two were Kousaka Yukiho, Honoka's sister and Ayase Alisa, Eri's.
"Good morning!" I walked deeper into the shop and had a look at the sweets placed on the shelves all around the room. "In the end, nothing beats Japan when it comes to these things." I muttered before turning to the red-haired young woman who was writing something on a notebook while her friend walked at the back door, presumable the kitchen. I smiled as I walked over to where Yukiho was standing.
Said woman was a little surprised as she paused her writing and our eyes met for a couple of second. "M-may I help you, ma'am?" She slightly backed away.
"She doesn't remember me?" I just smiled. "I just thought that shop is so lovely and I was wondering if the two of you alone are taking care of it."
There was a brief moment of pause before Yukiho smiled and patted her apron. "Yes. Alisa and I have been taking the business after our parents died." She looked down after saying these words. "My sister didn't take the news well as she was not able to get back home after hearing the news since she was trapped in a snowstorm in Nagiita. Not being able to assist to the burial, she has refused to get back to Tokyo so Alisa and I have to hang in there."
"I see… Sorry for asking such question." I spoke in a soft voice before attempting to change the topic by pointing to a random sweet. "May I know how much this cost?" Yukiho smiled back as she returned into her shopkeeper persona.
In the end, I never got the chance to meet Honoka again. One week later, I had to go back to Europe and never got the occasion to visit Japan anymore. I met a kindhearted woman who was taking care of an orphanage and helped her taking care of the orphans. After years of being together, the two of us got married. We had a happy family.
However, deep inside, there was always that deep emptiness that not even my wife was able to fill…
One night, as I looked up at the starry night from our manor's veranda, I sighed, remembering that it was a special day. "Today is Honoka's birthday… I wonder what she is doing…"
"Mama!" I was brought back into reality as a petite girl peeked from the veranda's door. She had short blonde hair and baby blue eyes. "I am done with my homework."
I smiled before waking back inside, grabbing my daughter in a bridal carry and walked over to the living room where my wife was resting. Said woman was busy working on some paperwork so I opted not to bother her.
I continued before taking seat on the couch and allowed our daughter to sit on my lap. After making sure that she was comfortable, I reached for the pile of book on the low table. "So, which book do you want Mama to read for you tonight, Honoka?"
The petite girl just smiled. "I am not really in the mood of a book right now…" She said before pausing. "Say, Mama…"
"What is it, Honey?"
"What does Honoka means? My classmates always make fun of me because my name is not very British…"
I chuckled. "Let them think whatever they want and don't let it bother you. If anyone dares to hurt you though, I will personally beat the tomato out of them." I said, comforting her and letting her know that I loved my daughter. "As for what Honoka means… I guess that name is important to me."
"What do you mean?" Honoka questioned while giving a tilt of the head, her big round orbs turning to me.
I just smiled before placing a kiss on her forehead. "I will tell you when you'll be older."
"Hein?"
Meanwhile, my wife just chuckled as she saw the two of us. "Be a good girl, okay? Honoka."
"Fiiine!"
The three of us then broke in laugher.
No one can forget their first love. As the petals of cheery blossom slowly fall down, I remember how wearing our uniforms felt.
Someday, I know I will smile again. However, I know that I will never forget how this pain feels like.
I will always remember how loving you felt. I never regretted being in love with you. You will forever have a place in my heart even though we'll never meet again.
I loved you… I still love you… I will love you…
Farewell, my first love.
Chapter 6: Anaty aizina
Chapter Text
Everyday as I wake up, I am already a new person.
I slowly opened my eyes and turned to the side to see Maki-chan still asleep. The two of us were sleeping in the same bed, in the bedroom of our new house. Since the two of us got married, lot of drama has followed but we always remained strong together. Our families have abandoned us. We were still young and naïve when the two of us has decided to get married. They have refused to accept our relationship since the red-head's parents has already made plan for her.
Maki-chan however didn't want that and I felt like it was my responsibility to fight for our happiness. So, following that, I started doing some part-time job and after getting paid, I picked my girlfriend at her house so the two of us could flee together.
Now, ten years after these events, it was very hard to find a job. At first, the two of us has managed a flower shop but things went very south and now I was a dealer of drug. I didn't like that job but at least it paid well and my boss, Ayase Eri, was an understanding person…or at least, as long as I didn't shit on her.
A sigh escaped my lips as I pushed my back up and leaned in to give my wife a kiss on the cheeks. She opened one eye and smiled at me. "Are you going already, Honoka?"
I just nodded. "I'd better be or Eri-chan will get angry." I stood up, a smile on my face before getting out of the bed. Maki-chan just watched as I was changing before also getting out of the bed. Her arms and legs were covered with scars mainly because all of the trouble caused by our escapes. After all, the two of us both used to be dealers at first but accidents happened and now, she was just to take care of the housework. After changing into a tracksuit, I moved back to where my wife was and gave her a peek on the lips. "See you tonight, honey!"
"Be careful, Honoka!" She replied before also standing up and walked toward the kitchen. "Be sure to eat breakfast properly. I don't want you to ruin your stomach."
"Yes, Mom!" I teased before running out of the house. It was still very early; the sun wasn't even rising yet but my first mission would be assigned by the boss soon. This job was very dangerous. Death like jail could reach us because of a single mistake but I couldn't stop. At least, not yet.
Maki-chan and I has been saving for a while so that we could retire from that life someday and move into a peaceful place such as the Awaji Island or Uchiura and reopen a flower shop over there. That was our biggest dream; to endure for now until the moment we will finally be able to reach that bright and peaceful future we were longing for.
As I continued to run, I looked down at the golden ring on my finger. The two of us has exchanged a pair of ring as a proof of our undying loyalty for each others, as a vow that we'll always love and respect each others. I wasn't keeping any secret for her and I was sure my wife would never hide anything to me.
We can't trust anyone else but ourselves.
The main reason why Maki-chan was caught in that accident few months prior was because we trusted our coworkers. We were still naïve back then and learned the hard way that the only thing that mattered to everyone was their one self and their families. Since that day, I have learned to act selfish and didn't care about anyone but my dear wife and myself.
Not long after, I have arrived at the headquarters. It was an abandoned underground parking where Eri gathered young women like me to assign their next mission. That morning, three other girls were also there with the blonde and her right hand Nozomi. The first newcomer had short orange hair and beside her stood a shy brunette. The last member to join on the mission was a shorter ravenette with crimson red-hair.
The purple-haired woman cleared her throat. "I have already handed you the details about today's mission. I know it's a little risky but someone has to do it and it pays well."
The ravenette scoffed, earning a glare from the blonde. "Is something wrong, Niko? Do you want to give up? If it's the case, I think I don't have any more choice but to shoot you down right away."
The short woman, whose name was apparently Niko, gritted her teeth. "As if! I knew the risk by accepting this job. This is my last option to save my family."
Eri smiled before turning to me. "Honoka, you will be leading this operation. I already made the briefing for the other members. You can trust Rin and Hanayo to assure your back. For this mission, you'll have to assassinate the daughter of Mrs. Minami and steal a key from her. Said key should be able to open a drawer at the abandoned factory south her." She moved closer to the large table where a map was and pointed at several locations. The four of us mentally took note as we listened to her. "You will have to escape the elite agents of the Minami Corporation first and get the product hidden there. Once you get it, come back here after making sure no one is following you. If you success this mission, each of you will get two million yen as recompense."
"Woaa! Two millions each?" The other ginger — Rin — had her jaw drop.
Her friend Hanayo however was starting to tremble. Maybe she was not used to such dangerous job but was forced because she had a heavy debt or something like that. Well, it didn't matter as long as she was able to execute the mission.
And with that, the three of us exited the HQ and made our plan. Killing wasn't really something I was willing to do, especially not for money… but Maki-chan and I had debts to pay and we needed more cash if we wanted to have a better life. It was a once in a lifetime chance so if assassinating someone would allow us to move away from this life, I would do it.
Everyday, I am always hoping that someday, we will get out of this dark period. Someday, the wheel of fortune will switch.
"We found it nya!" Rin happily said as she grabbed the package out of the drawer. I forced a smile. Our moment of glory however was short-lived as several people suddenly appeared from behind the counter and we had to run for our lives. Unfortunately, Hanayo was rather slow compared to everyone else and got shot in the leg. She fell on the ground and her friend stopped after giving Niko the package as to pick the brunette. "Kayo-chin!"
"You must flee, Rin-chan! I will be fine but you have to go home. You need that cash to pay your sister's hospital fee."
"No. I am not going to abandon a friend!"
"Rin-chan!"
That was the last time we saw the two of them as I quickly grabbed Niko's wrist and dragged her. I knew that was very bad of me. But thinking about it, what could we have done? Our pistols were almost out of bullet and our enemies were too numerous. I just continued to run forward into the forest, tears falling on my cheeks.
We have to step on the others as to live.
After handing the package to Eri, she gave us the promised payment, not even questioning about Rin or Hanayo. Deep inside, I knew that she knew not that the four of us won't be able to make it out alive. Burying these thoughts deep inside, I walked back home.
As soon as I was there, I buried my face in my wife's chest and let my tears come out. Maki-chan was fast to understand as she sat down on the couch and started stroking my hair. No matter how much I pretended I was hardened and nothing would affect me but Maki-chan, I still had my humanity left. Even though I barely knew Rin and Hanayo, I knew they were in the same boat as we were.
"Honoka…" The red-head's voice helped me relax. "It's all right. You can cry if you want."
And so I did. I didn't know how long I cried but Maki-chan remained with me until I was feeling calmer. After that, I told her about the payment and we prepared our stuff so we could leave that down the following day.
Why is this I am still alive when so many people are dead right now…?
Maki-chan and I, according to our plan, has started to live in the Island of Awaji. I have decided to become a botanist while she was working at the pharmacy. After paying all our debts and cleaning our past, we barely had any cash to allow us to live but it was fine with me. It was just a small sacrifice for a peaceful life.
I never heard of Eri nor Niko after that and no one has ever been looking for us. The two of us were living in a small house and has adopted a young girl we named Setsumi and spent the remaining of our lives like a happy family. However, I knew deep inside that my past would haunt me. I made lot of nightmare, reminding me that all these atrocities have happened. However, thanks to Maki-chan who has always remained by my side, I have managed to move on forward.
"It is fine to be scared. It is fine to remember our past failure. However, it's because of the lessons we learned from them that we can move on into a better future. I believe in you, Honoka! As long as the two of us are together, I am sure no matter the trial, we will walk away triumphant."
Chapter 7: Eternise-moi
Chapter Text
Naïve… and weak… she has everything to please me.
My name; Nishikino Maki. I am from a family of vampire that has been living in Japan for centuries now. We were forced to travel a lot and never stay at a place for more than five to ten years. We were, once again, going into another town.
It was a small village that only had one high school. I found it annoying that I had to, once again restart my first year.
Us vampires can live a lot longer than mere humans but it takes time for us to become adult. Humans become one on their 20 to 30 years while we only started growing by 100 or even 150 years of living. I was 75 when we have decided to start that new life and was starting to get bored.
On my first day to school, nothing really interesting happened. It was the very boring "new transferred student" stuff that I had to live for the 4th time since I was on this earth. However, on the second day, as I was spending some time alone in the music room, I sensed a presence. There she was; a young girl with short ginger hair attached in side-tails and these innocent blue eyes watching through the glass door and right toward me.
I attempted to ignore her but said girl got in and approached me with a bright smile. That was a cloudy day in autumn. Our race didn't fear things such as the sun or crosses or garlic or any of these because we are royal blood. We also can turn other humans into vampire and can have children…but in exchange, we need to drink lot of blood.
My family worked in the hospital or other populated area so we could feed on the clients and then clean their memories. I also sometimes drink my classmates' blood when starving and brainwash them later.
"Hello there!" I was brought back into reality by the other girl's cheerful voice. She leaned closer before finally sitting beside me on the bench. "Do you also like to play piano?"
I didn't respond. Instead, I just turned away. My plan was to just relax and maybe play a little but I was certainly not in the mood of talking to anyone. "I am busy. Please leave."
"Jeez! So cold." She complained before sighing and closed her eyes, her hands starting to play a melody on the large ivory keys. "And I thought we could be friends… Most of the students here are very boring as they always talk about athletic. Sure, I like sports but I also need music in my life. In the end, I was the only students who have ever visited this room to play the piano for two years now."
"How boring…"
She nodded while continuing to play the tune. I didn't recognize what she was playing though. I have already heard lot of famous tunes but not that one. Maybe she wrote it herself.
"My name is Honoka by the way." She continued after a while, eyes still closed and fingers dancing on the keys. "Our family has moved into this town last year because of financial reasons. The problem is I am having difficulty with the people around here. I like to make friend but the center of interest is too different."
I just nodded, not even bothering to look at her. How naïve! She just revealed three informations I could use against her if I was a bad person.
"The truth is… I…" Her pace of playing slowed down as she slowly opened her eyes. "I find this life a little boring…." She continued as her fingers stopped and she turned to me. "I miss a busy life where we life the moment for the moment and not spend slow pace of day like here. Plus, I like girls but the people around here will look at you weirdly if you say that aloud."
"Of course." I finally turned to her to meet a pair of very innocent blue orbs looking straight into my soul. "You can't just go around town and scream atop every building that you are gay…or lesbian that is."
She took a small breath, closing her eyes before leaning closer. "What about you? Don't you find normality too boring?"
I backed away and tried to push her. I usually had superhuman strength but there was something about this girl that was making me feel weak. "What are you doing? I don't even know you."
She opened her eyes, her face only few centimeters from mine. "It must be nice having a very long life with lot of possibility… having to deal with the fear that someone might find your secret. You must have traveled a lot and seen all kind of landscape, didn't you, Maki-chan?"
"W-what are you talking about?" My face turned red as I pushed her. "I don't understand anything you are saying, sorry. Also, hasn't anyone told you it's rude to call someone by their first name without getting their approbation? And finally, do not dig into other people's personallives."
Honoka just chuckled. "You're acting so cold, Maki-chan~" She sat back straight and played another music. It had a tragic feeling to it that made my chest heavy from guilt over everything I have already done. Seriously, who was that girl? "But you don't have to pretend anything with me. I know all your secrets."
I scoffed, trying to bluff while calming my fast-beating heartbeat. "You don't know anything about me."
She just smiled while continuing with the sad tune. "My family has been hunting vampires for centuries now. However, an incident happened two years ago as everyone else, except me in our clan died. I, then decided to abandon the quest and fled from Tokyo to here where I could restart everything from anew. But, I can't help but to miss the thrill of someone wanting your head off your neck."
I was taken by surprise by that and readied my fang. This girl was dangerous. She might have that cheerful aura around her but god knew what she hid behind that smile. "What are you expecting from me? Even if you manage to kill me-"
"Not so fast, Maki-chan." She interrupted me. "I just want to ask a service from you." She said and got my intention. Honoka stopped playing and faced me. "In exchange, I will devote this life to serving you."
I paused an instant, thinking. She was proposing something to me; a hunter talking with a vampire. However, she has said she was the last alive hunter of her clan so might as well try to listen. If it was something stupid or such, I could always suck her dry and ask my parents to brainwash the whole town and delete every record about that girl. "I am listening."
"Turn me into a vampire." She said without a moment of hesitation.
I was left surprised as my jaw hung for a good minute. "Wait one minute! What are you saying there?"
"I already told you earlier. I am bored of this life. I miss these times where I can live the thrill of adventure." Honoka explained as she stood up and walked over to the glass window. It was starting to rain outside, adding more into the depressing mood that already existed. "If I become a vampire and work under your service, people will target me, wanting me dead and we can flee away every time hunters find our traces. I won't interfere with your lives. I just want to feel fear once again."
I looked at her with horror. What's wrong with that girl? "Are you just insane?"
She turned back to me and waved a very innocent smile. "I want to live a life where I don't want to regret anything."
I looked down before standing up and walked over to her. "You're just stupid."
Betray my feelings… sacrifice my reasons…
Eternize yourself, eternize myself.
"We're home." I said as I stepped inside the large house that served as the Nishikino residence. Mama was reading a magazine in the living room.
She saw Honoka walking from behind me and placed said book on the table. "Maki-dear… Did you finally make any friend~?" She happily said before running toward the newly-made vampire girl. "You can call me Mama if you want~"
Honoka returned the smile. "Yes, Mama! From today on, I will be serving your daughter until the day I die."
Mama quickly understood the meaning of her words and rushed toward the kitchen to call for a maid. "Please make preparation for a party to celebrate Maki-dear's first vampire sous-fifre!"
It was a popular event among us royal blood to make a party for every first human we turn into vampire. Honoka was my very first and most likely to be the last. I just sighed as said girl joined Mama preparing the party. At least, I knew that day that my boring days were going to be not-so-boring anymore now.
Sentence me, with one look…
Bleeding for your voice…
Eternize yourself, eternize myself.
Chapter 8: Coup de cœur & Dernière chance
Notes:
I will switch the point of view a lot for this chapter.
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
Honoka's PoV
"Do you, Nishikino Maki, accept this woman as thou wife through joy and sorrow as you both shall live?" The woman with long purple hair attached in a ponytail, dressed in a priest's outfit turned to the crimson-haired woman who was clad in a white wedding dress.
"I do!" Maki smiled at me, her soon-to-be wife, our fingers being intertwined, a pair of blue orbs meeting violet ones.
Nozomi smiled at that and turned to the me—who was also wearing a white wedding dress. "Do you, Kousaka Honoka, accept to take this woman as thou wife through joy and sorrow as you both shall live?"
I smiled at the priestess first before turning to her fiancée. "I do!"
The purplenette cleared her throat before closing the book on the altar and smiled as the guests—who were sitting on the bench facing they stood up in anticipation. "By the power that was conferred to me, I shall now declare thou wife and wife!" She eyed at us. I was smiling, some tears of happiness threatening to form at the edge of my eyes while Maki was awkwardly smiling, trying to keep a calm façade. "You can kiss the bride."
The guests started cheering while some of them started taking pictures, especially a certain orange-haired woman and another ravenette. As we leaned closer and shared a gentle kiss, Rin and Niko started whistling while my father whipped some tears from the corner of his eyes, snoozing hard on a handkerchief.
We separated after few seconds that seemed like an eternity, our heart beating so fast and in sync that it colored our faces in pink. I smiled and Maki returned it before the two of us turned to the guests and started walking near the entrance. Soon enough, our friends and family started congratulating us one by one.
It was a normal Saturday in spring when the flowers started to bloom once again, and the sacred union between Kousaka Honoka and Nishikino Maki was held at one of Otonokizaka High's classroom. Since same-gender marriage was not totally approved in the region, we have just decided to organize something like such with our circle of friend and other close family members. The fact that both of us were good friend with the chairwoman helped a lot as well as she allowed us to hold the reception on the school ground.
I once thought there was no place for someone like me in this world. I got enough of being hurt… but then you barked into my life and made a vortex out of it.
"Congratulation, nya!" Rin exclaimed cheerfully as Niko and her shook our hands. The two of them were just wearing plain dark-blue work suits since we agreed to not make it too flashy. We wanted something simple and not too complex.
"Thank you, Rin-chan!" I jumped and hugged her tightly. Rin returned the embrace soon. "I hope that Niko-chan and you too will get together soon as well." The two women in question started blushing at that comment.
The raven-haired woman started rubbing the back of her head awkwardly, face colored in pink while laughing nervously. "A-anyway, good luck, guys! I know you'll do your best!" And with that, the two walked toward the auditorium to allow the other guests greet the newlywed.
Next up were my parents and sister. Dad was really touched and couldn't help some tears of happiness—something in the line of "My little cotton candy has grown so much! I can still remember how yesterday you were just a fresh brioche just out of the oven, and now, you are a full-grown multi-season sandwich."—while Mom was the supportive type. Yukiho just smiled and wished us lot of luck.
As for Maki's parents, they weren't the talkative type on that day since their hospital was getting through different kind of problem and just congratulated us before excusing themselves. "We are sorry dear, but we just got a very important call." The mother apologized.
"It's all right!" The red-head smiled, understanding that despite not being there on the day, her parents were still very supportive of them. "Good luck… since I guess you will need some!"
The last ones to greet us were Nozomi and Hanayo who were now clad in yellow and green dresses. "I am glad for you two!" The taller of the duo smiled and shook our hands.
"Yeah!" I nodded, smiling brightly. "We got through so many difficulties until now and I'm so glad we always stayed strong together."
"And now, we got married!" The woman standing beside me continued while reaching for my hand as if we could communicate by telepathy. "It's the best recompense possible."
"Right!" The young brown-haired woman nodded. "You got through so many things, but I'm glad you are together now."
The four of us giggled at that and started walking toward the auditorium where a party was being held. While walking, Maki and I walked beside each other and intertwined fingers, not watching at each other, but watching the same thing; not walking toward each other anymore, but walking the same path.
I dreamed so much…
That tomorrow will be better than yesterday, not as bad as today…
Would pay back for all my prayers…
Maki's PoV
"I'm home!" Honoka exclaimed as she slid the door of our new apartment open and removed her outdoor shoes.
"Welcome home!" I ran from the kitchen and hugged my wife, who happily returned the embrace. We separated after few seconds to allow the working wife inside. The two of us walked toward the living room and sat on the couch while waiting for the rice to cook. "So, how was work today?"
That was our daily life since getting wed! The housewife—me—would take care of the chores while Honoka would work as an office lady. The two of us were renting an apartment, not far from Nozomi's and were very happy they way we were living. Already half a year has passed since the 'big day' and nothing has come to trouble our life since then.
We have changed a lot—matured—over the few months we started living together—me being more honest and open while Honoka was growing responsible and self-conscious.
As the business woman told me about her boss giving her a promotion, I smiled happily, ranting back about the progress I made in learning cooking. Sure, I was an excellent cook by that time, but I always wanted to the best for my wife. I would spend my days watching programs or visiting our friend Hanayo or Rin to learn about things like cooking, cleaning, washing and such.
We talked for 15 more minutes until the rice cooker made a song, signaling that the rice was ready. I stood up and walked at the kitchen's counter while Honoka smiled while watching. Suddenly though, without summation, I started feeling ditzy and lost balance. I could see my wife standing up from the couch and running into my direction, catching me before I fell on the floor. "Maki-chan… Maki-chan…" My vision started to blur out as her voice seemed so far, my mind getting fuzzy and my breath slowing down.
[-x-x-x-]
I slowly opened my eyes and found myself in a small room whose walls were painted in white. I was laid on a metallic bed, a white blanket covering the lower half of my body. Few monitors and serum were placed beside the bed and the only glass window of the room was open, allowing the morning wind and sunrays in. I slowly pushed my back so I was in a sitting position and realized then that someone—or a group of someone—else was in the room.
"Ah… Maki-chan!" Nozomi quickly ran beside in my direction and held my hands.
"Thank goodness you're awake!" Hanayo joined her hands and placed them on her chest, thanking whatever gods she believed in.
"You scared us!" Niko was still standing near the entrance door while shoving a lollipop in her mouth, trying to sound calm, but the concern in the tone of her voice betraying her.
Honoka slowly walked beside me and hugged me without saying a word. I understood, smiled and returned the hug. "Yes, I know! I love you too!"
Niko's PoV
"WHAT DID YOU SAY?" I jumped from her chair I was previously sitting in and slammed my palms on the responsible doctor's desk. The others started looking down, remaining silence as the older red-head woman wearing a white oversized blouse placed her hands on her desk.
"N-Niko-chan… Please calm down…" My girlfriend tried to give some common sense into my, but I was too enraged at the time that nothing could have stopped me.
The doctor cleared her throat slowly and carefully before eying the 6 younger women who were gathered in her office. I let go of a sigh and decided to not slam her desk this time. "Like I said, there was a complication during the operation and things have turned south." Mrs. Nishikino's voice remained calm despite being very hurt deep inside.
Maki, whose eyes were glued on the floor, with her wife gently patting her back, just sobbed lightly, tears forming at the corner of her eyes. She was not the only one since Honoka, Hanayo and Nozomi too were on verge of crying. "So…" The red-head slowly asked in between her sobs. "How many days do I have left?"
I felt my heart drop in my chest at my friend's question. Sure, we were just told about Maki's bad situation, but it was still hard for me to hear her say such thing. The doctor however kept her stoic façade, even though it pained her to be the one announcing that Kousaka Maki—her daughter who she gave birth to, breed and raised—was in a very dire situation.
There was a brief silence before the older woman replied. "You have 3 months maximum…" I clenched my fist and Rin held my hands, signaling me not to do anything foolish. "However…" The younger women except Maki lifted their head, eyes filled with hope. "You might survive if we find a donor." The doctor placed her elbows on the table. "As I've already said before, your heart was damaged, but you WILL be able to survive if we find someone compatible who is willing to donate an organ."
"Really?" Honoka stood up from her chair, eyes brimming with hope.
The older woman nodded. "Indeed! We will research for a potential donor and will contact you if we find one." Her expression darkened as she lowered her head after saying that though. "But we can't guarantee anything though. As you might know, donating heart would mean death for the donor and few people are really willing to give their lives. That plus the fact that that person has to be the same sanguine group or at least an universal donor and have other compatibility facts with the receptor." Mrs. Nishikino and the younger women both looked down after that last sentence.
Already there, Honoka fell back on her chair, eyes dull, depraved of hopes, tears falling on her cheeks. "N-no way…" She muttered under her breath.
I didn't know what to do. I was not a science expert but I knew we were in dire situation.
Honoka's PoV
"Thank you, Honoka!" Maki said with a gentle smile as I helped her on the bed. The two of us were back from the hospital and were now ready to sleep after dining. Our friends has decided to stay at our apartment that night and laid few futons near the bed.
"Good night, everyone!" Nozomi turned the light off and everyone fell on their sleeping spot.
That night, I couldn't sleep. I was too worried about my wife. I loved her more than anything in the world. I was just an empty, irresponsible, air-head and idiot shell before meeting Maki and couldn't imagine the fact of living without her. I hugged my wife tightly and prayed whatever gods that might be watching over them.
Take my hand… hold it tightly… I'm so scared.
Please stay by my side, my heart.
The next day went on with me having to go to work, having asked Nozomi to keep an eye on my spouse, and fortunately, said fortuneteller had her day off. The oldest of our group of friend was more than willing to help as she agreed instantly.
Maki's PoV
I was still able to stand and do chores though and decided to help Nozomi, instead of just laying on the bed the whole day. "I don't want to be a burden, so I will do my best until…" My train of though was cut as the shorter girl's phone rang.
"Yeah! I'm at Honoka-chan and Maki-chan's place right now… No, I have the day off… Yeah, you can." The purplenette put her phone back on the low table and lit the TV on before walking toward the kitchen corner, where I was pealing potatoes. "It was Hanayo-chan! She said that they didn't have class today and asked if she can come."
I just smiled. "Of course!"
Not long after, the brown-haired florist arrived, a plastic bag in hand and greeted the two of us. We spent the day talking about stuffs. They did their best not to mention anything related to my illness and I was thankful.
The two following months went by with our friends visiting us as much as they could and the two of us doing our best to comfort each others.
One night, I have been woken up aggressively by a nausea and ran to the restroom, followed by my wife. Just as we arrived there, I started coughing blood, Honoka holding my wife's hair and doing her best to comfort and ease the pain, something I was glad of. "Maki-chan…"I could feel my wife's voice drop and knew she has been broken.
Honoka's PoV
My red-haired wife finally stood up again after several minutes and smiled gently at me as an attempt. "Thank you, Honoka!" That however wasn't enough as I felt very guilty for not being of any help toward her. I vowed to always protect Maki and seek for her happiness… but now, I was just being uselessly praying for whatever gods to save my beloved one.
We haven't received a single call from the hospital about any possible donor and it was revealed that Maki only had few weeks remaining. "Too soon…"I cursed the fact of thinking about living without her.
After cleaning ourselves up, we walked toward the bedroom and slept in each other's arms. Well, I tried to, but couldn't. My mind was overworking on trying to find a solution. I spent half of the night remembering every good moment she spent with the red-haired woman—from their first meeting at the music room to the day where I finally decided to confess—and the other half praying every existing divination I knew, wishing for my last resort to success. That was the last alternative. I was going to put my all in that attempt, that plan and I was hoping with all her beings that it will success… for Maki… and for myself…
Niko's PoV
The phone placed on the low table rang and Maki slowly reached for it from the couch. She quickly pressed the 'answer' button as she saw who was calling. "Honoka…"
"Maki-chan… I am sorry, but I won't be able to come home tonight either. Do not worry though, I will do my best to come back tomorrow at dawn."
The call was ended before the red-head could reply. She just placed the cell phone back on the low table and watched as I walked in the living room, an annoyed look on my face. I was just trying to cook something on the kitchen but could see her from the small window connecting the kitchen and the living room. She also had that habit of putting her phone in speaker mode.
"Let me guess, Mrs. Kousaka-chan couldn't make it home tonight as well." I asked, pissed off and Maki just nodded slowly. "Jeez! That idiot! It's the third time this week! Doesn't she realize that you are worried for her? Where is that idiot right now? Is she trying to flee her responsibilities or what?"
Maki remained silent. Normally, she would defend her wife, but to be honest, I knew she was starting to feel unsure about anything. She only had two weeks left and still had no news about the hospital or a possible donor and Honoka has grown distant the past week. "Honoka… Where are you now? I miss you so much…" She muttered under her breath her arms wrapping around her body as a proof of loneliness. I walked behind her and gave a comforting hug. I knew it wasn't as effective as Honoka's, but I had to try to comfort my friend.
Maki's PoV
"I'm home!" Honoka exclaimed as she removed her shoes before walking toward the hallway, but I ran in her direction and tackled her on the floor, digging my face in her chest as tears ran on my cheeks. "Maki-chan…?"
"Honoka! Honoka! Idiot Honoka! You're such an idiot!" I held her on the floor of our apartment's hallway, crying my heart out.
The ginger smiled and started playing with my untied hair before hugging me tightly with her other arm. "I am here, Maki-chan! I am here!" Her voice started to break down slowly and she found herself sobbing as well not long after, hugging me as tight as she could.
The two of us parted after few minutes and walked toward the dining room. We ate our favorite dishes that night—I have decided to apply myself to the chore and wanted to make lot of happy time for us since I had less than a week left to live. We talked about everything. Weirdly enough, we felt like being very talkative that night and brought up all kind of discussions, including our lives from back in high school, college, our families and former friends. We were on our little world that night and I felt complete.
I want to live to the fullest, to hold you as tightly as possible for the remaining of our life.
"Maki-chan, I love you!" Honoka said out of nowhere, bringing me back to my sense, as the two of us were taking care of the dishes. "I love you very much to the point where I can't describe it with words!"
I was surprised but decided to smile after one minute of confusion since I knew my wife was this kind of person—the kind of person who would just say random things at a random time. "Yeah! I love you too! I really love you!"
After we were done, we got to bed and hugged each other after Honoka turned the lights off. "Maki-chan…" She said in a low voice. I nodded, still wrapping my body and mind with the ginger since the two of us has decided to share our love in body language. Since I was going to die anyway, I didn't see a reason to deprave ourselves of some 'fun skinship' anymore. Our clothes were soon out of the way and lost inside the blankets. "Tomorrow, I will have to depart earlier… but I promise you it will be the last time I'll leave you alone. After that, I will always be by your side no matter the time or the place. I will always be beside you!" She crawled atop me.
"Honoka…" I buried my face in her chest. "Thank you!"
Nozomi's PoV
"So, there she went?" Niko said sarcastically as she jumped at the young couple's couch.
It was Sunday, so our circle of friend was gathered at Maki and Honoka's place. We have decided to start playing some society game like truth and dare and other childish games while eating lot of snack.
"I wish Honoka-chan was here as well." Rin commented as she threw the dice.
"I guess it couldn't have been helped." Maki explained as she started fidgeting with her fingers. "She begged me to not stop her and promised that it will be the last time and we will always be together after today."
I smiled at these words before flipping a card, revealing the 4 of diamond. "Is that so?" The red-head nodded as I quickly flipped the card once again. "I'm glad for you two." I forced a smile before standing up toward the counter. As soon as I was out of the other's vision though, my expression darkened. "Honoka-chan… What are you really planning to do?" I knew that the cards are trying to tell me something. Fourth meant death and diamond means love; I knew that for sure but something seemed off.
Deciding to just brush these thoughts away, I returned back with some beverage and took seat around the table as to continue our party of Dungeon and Dragon.
The day passed by like a flash and the evening soon came. The five of us started cooking and having girly talk when suddenly, Maki's cell phone rang. She slowly reached for it, still laughing from one of Rin's joke. "Hello! Kousaka Maki here!"
"Good evening, Miss Kousaka! This is the hospital calling! We wanted to tell you that we found a donor for you!" A pair of violet eyes widened and the three other women quickly rushed by her side as Maki increased the volume of the phone that was already on speaker mode. I placed the ladle I was previously holding and calmly walked over. "Please come to the hospital as soon as you could. Also, the donor was put anonym for now, and will only be revealed after the operation success."
Our group of friend cheered as Niko grabbed the phone, a huge smile on her face. "Thank you, Madam! We are going to depart right now!" And with that, the call ended. She then hugged her friend and rubbed their cheeks together. "Ata girl! You heard that chick, Maki-chan! You are going to live! You heard me; you are going to LIVE!"
Maki smiled back. I knew that she felt very happy, even though she was also feeling sad and guilty deep inside of the fact that someone was going to sacrifice themselves to allow her to live. She then took her phone back and quickly dialed Honoka's number.
"Hello!"
"Honoka; we got a donor! We are already on our way to the hospital! Please meet us there as soon as you could!"
"Is that so?"There was a brief silence before the ginger spoke again. "I am already on my way too."And another silence. "I love you, Maki-chan!"
The red-head felt a foreign sadness overwhelming her all of sudden as her smile drop. "Honoka…" I knew that Maki had the feeling that her wife was smiling at the other end of the line and couldn't help her lips to curl into a smile as well. "I love you too, Honoka!"
Rin's PoV
"The operation was a huge success!" Ms Nishikino smiled widely as she entered the room where Maki was assigned to rest after the operation.
Niko, Nozomi, Hanayo and I cheered and started jumping in all direction. "Yay! Thanks God!"
Maki however looked slightly down for few facts, but lifted her head after a while. "By the way, has anyone seen Honoka?" We all shook our heads.
"Jeez!" My girlfriend groaned before hugging her friend with all her might. "That idiot! How stupid one could be? She should be there to hug her precious wife, but God knows where she is right now."
The doctor cleared her throat and gathered everyone else's attention. "I don't really want to ruin your little party, but as the head surgeon, my duty is to reveal the identity of your donor…" She then eyed at the five of us and forced a smile.
Maki stood from the metallic bed and walked beside the taller woman. The rest of us stood behind them and the six of us walked out of the room and toward the elevator, leading at the second basement. It was a dark and cold place, only lit by few lamps. Few weird-looking people who were taking care of the corpse stopped their activities to greet us and we greeted back.
Soon enough, we arrived at a huge room where a metallic table was placed at the center. Lying atop it was someone, a white blanket covering their body. We understood that this person—dead—there was the donor and stepped in as to thank whoever that person was, even though their body might not be able to feel anything anymore.
I gulped as I was not really comfortable with things related to death, just as Hanayo clung to Nozomi's arm, the later looking down as if she already knew what was going to happen next. The doctor walked beside us and gripped the blanket, ready to reveal the identity of the donor. "Are you ready?" Mrs. Nishikino asked and Maki nodded, taking a deep breath. "In that case…" The older woman tightened her grip on the cover and shoved it aside.
Maki's PoV
The sky was dark gray as the wind blew, shoving the dead leaves aside. Near the town was a cemetery where few people were gathered. Among these people wearing black clothes were Nozomi, Niko, Rin, Hanayo and me. The five of us were either crying their heart off—Rin and Hanayo—while comforting each other or just sobbing while looking down—Niko and Nozomi.
At two meters away from them few men and boys were working with their shovel to bury a coffin on a hole made for that purpose. My father, Kotaro and Mr. Toujou were among them. Mr. Kousaka was just sitting on the gravestone that was going to be used on the spot. He was looking down at his feet and kicked a rock at random while patting Yukiho's head. The young ginger was crying her heart out in her mother's embrace.
The ceremony ended after another hour of speech, and only Honoka's parents and Istayed behind. Nozomi and Hanayo have agreed to take Yukiho with them since the young girl passed out from crying too much. The three of us who remained behind just watched blankly at the new tomb in front of them. Few white lilies flowers, bread, a keychain, and a yellow ribbon were attached to the gravestone, in which few information about the person resting down there were unscripted.
I looked up at the depressing sky and let go of a very heavy sigh, my face now dry and her eyes tired, very tired from crying. "Honoka…"
Mr. and Mrs. Kousaka finally decided to walk away after a while, leaving my alone. O stepped in a kneeled in front of the tomb, my eyes reading the ensigns.
Here lays Kousaka Honoka, 1998 – 2028…
Thou shall be remembered as a great daughter, sister, friend, daughter-in-law, workmate and wife. May you rest in peace!
A single tear ran on the widowed woman's—in other words my—pale cheek and I gripped the hem of the vest I was wearing. "Honoka…" I looked down and then lifted my head, anger filling my eyes. "I hate you! Didn't you say that you'll always stay by my side? That you will never leave me alone anymore… That you will always be there for me…" My voice started to drop at each sentence. "I really love you! You were everything to me! I thought that my destiny would always be dull and I will end up like these emotionless people who have no dream, but then you found me, and from that day on, my monochrome destiny found new colors."
A sniff escaped my lips and I was back to looking back at the sky.
"You know… What I said earlier was a lie…" I said with a forced smile. "I really love you! I love you with all my being! There is no chance I will ever hate you, you heard!" I then stepped closer and ran her fingers on the cold stone. "And I am sure that wherever you are right now, you are always watching me and you can count on me that you will always be the only one for me…" I held my hand on my chest and felt my heartbeat. Honoka's heart was beating imside of me. "Thank you, Honoka!" I smiled and kneeled down once again, flipped the ring that was on my ring finger and stood up before walking away, the ring from our engagement on my finger as a proof that Honoka was and would always be the only one for me.
Honoka's PoV
I understand it now!
Take care, Maki-chan… because even though my body is gone…
…I know that the story has just begun… You and me as one…
One second of being a donor. From now on, I will forever be your coup de cœur .
Notes:
I just happened to come across these two songs while hanging around YouTube. Seriously, I always feel empty whenever I hear one of these songs.
Sorry for these who got heartbroken from this! I promise I will write a more cheerful chapter following this.
For now, until next time~
Chapter Text
Honoka's PoV
Waking up first thing in the morning, I was greeted by a familiar ceiling and an agreeable sunlight illuminating the inside of my room. A smile appeared on my lips as I wasted no time to stand up and open the window. From the second floor of the Homura bakery, I could see lot of awesome landscapes, especially one of these early mornings.
It was barely 7:00 in the morning and I woke up before my alarm clock. It was not like me but I was excited. After all, my days have become more fun lately. The past me would be very surprised if someone told her she was going to enjoy waking up earlier but it really is happening. It is like I have once said "miracles do exist!"
A yawn escaped me and I walked over to the bed to tidy what I could before rushing toward the washroom to wash my face. Passing by Yukiho's room, I peeked my head in and gave a smile. "Wake up, Yukiho! It's time for breakfast."
My younger sister groaned as she appeared from the pile of covers on her bed, her hair in a mess and her eyes still half asleep. "Jeez! What has gotten into you lately, sis? You've been waking up early everyday and are always smiling and happy for god knows what reasons."
The response just came as a chuckle as I walked back downstairs, putting an apron on and walking toward the kitchen. "Good morning, Mom!" I greeted the older woman who was already clad in her apron and housewife outfit.
"Morning, Honoka! You're early as always today."
I just smiled and helped her preparing breakfast. After that, I walked back in my room and got changed into my school uniform, grabbing my cellphone in which a tomato keychain was attached to. I smiled while browsing through the contact list and sent a message to my friends.
Honocchi: Good morning, everyone! It's such a nice morning, isn't it?
With that, I closed my phone and started walking downstairs. As I arrived at the kitchen though, the cellphone vibrated, notifying me about a new message. I quickly opened it and was redirected to the group chat of the µ's.
Nozomama: You're so full of energy since morning, aren't you, Honocchi~? Did something good happen with Maki-chan?
I just chuckled before composing a fast answer and took seat around the kotatsu. Yukiho and Mom were already sitting there and the three of us started right away. Dad was still on a business trip at Numazu to sign a contract with a mikan producer for our shop.
With that, I left to school and was greeted by my two childhood friends. Even if µ's has separated, the 9 of us were always very close to each others. I was now a third year in Otonokizaka and the president of the student council.
On that warm summer day, I have already concluded that once I graduate, I will pass the relay to Maki-chan… I mean the student council duty. Now that I think about it, we had lot of things in common. Back when I was still a freshman, I was designated to become the responsible of the orientation because I was the class representative. The same happened to Maki-chan and if I guess right, this year's orientation leader will be Alisa-chan.
As we arrived at the school gate, both Umi-chan, Kotori-chan and I felt vibrating from our bags and checked our phones to see a series of several message in the chatroom.
Elicchi: Good morning! How is everyone doing?
Rin-nya: Nyamazing! Rin heard Maki-chan and Honoka-chan went on a date last Sunday!
Elicchi: Khorosho!
ToMaki: RIIIIINNN!
I just chuckled before typing something as the three of us got to the locker room to change our shoes. Umi-chan was not as tense as she used to be, getting angry at the slightest thing because thanks to Maki-chan, I have turned better. Because my days were filled with fun, I was willing to wake up earlier and because she spoiled me for every good act I do, doing my homework in advance and getting good grade became a piece of cake.
Honocchi: Maki-chan's dress was so cute~ We went to the cinema to watch Kantai Collection the movie. Maki-chan almost cried at the apogee with the Mutsuki x Kisaragi moment.
ToMaki: NOOO! Don't tell them that, Honoka! Jeez!
Umi-dah: So shameless!
Another chuckle escaped my lips as we stepped into our classroom and homeroom started not long after. We all shut our phone down and focused on studying.
Maki's PoV
Jeez! I swear, that Honoka!
A sigh escaped my lips as class ended for the day. I was going out with the ginger and loved her responsible self but she could be very childish at other time. I really hate it while she organizes something alongside Rin and Nico-chan. Leaving these three together is the worst mistake that, I swear, will bring apocalypse on these sacred lands.
Afterschool!
My two friends and I left the classroom and met with our seniors. Honoka was, as usually, stuffing herself with a loaf of bread but quickly hid the snack as she saw us coming, running into our direction and giving a high-five to Rin.
"Honoka-nya!"
"Rin-chan!"
A sigh escaped my lips as Hanayo just chuckled awkwardly. After that, the six of us went downtown to hang out, visiting all kind of shops and stopping at the arcade.
Honoka has decided to challenge me on a fighting game and I was more than against it.
"Heeeeiiiinnnn!? Why?"
I didn't reply while just playing with the tip of my hair. Rin has taken the opportunity by adding her grain of salt. "Fufufu~" She scoffed. "Could it be that Maki-chan is scared of losing against the great Honoka-nya?"
"Nonsense!" I said, feeling like my pride was hurt. I quickly walked beside my girlfriend and grabbed one joystick. "Bring it on!"
"That's the spirit!"
And of course, it ended with Honoka's 10 successive victories. As I thought, I will never rival her in question of game. I sighed while turning to her. She turned a smile to me, making my heart skip a beat before stepping beside me and holding my hand.
"Never mind, Maki-chan! If you aren't that good with games, you are already talented enough in everything else."
I felt like my pride took a huge damage, like got critical hit in the game Honoka lent me. What was it again? Fire Emblem Thracia 776? Whatever. I just scoffed.
"Don't be that angry, Maki-chan!" She insisted, trying to get into my vision but I would turn my head elsewhere every time, feeling my cheeks puffing up. That only made her chuckle. "Come on, Maki-hamu! Let us have parfait after this!"
I can't tell you that you are my true love… that would be too out of character for me.
My pout only intensified and Honoka's eyes started to tear up. "A-are you angry, Maki-chan?" She gave a begging puppy-like face and my rock hard heart instantly melted.
"N-not really…" I said, attempting to save my remaining pride while my hand moved on its own to play with my strands of hair.
"Yay!" My girlfriend cheered, hugging me from behind. She was shorter than me so she had lot of difficulties. "Let us get some parfaits in that case!" She happily said.
The hug felt comfortable. Honoka has become more reliable from time to time despite always being careless most of the time. Well… it wasn't as if I totally hated it though. She was cute while pouting and her genki tendencies to drag me along have helped us a lot.
I can't tell you that you are my true love… that would be too out of character for me.
Just at that time, my cellphones rang. I took it from my pocket. It had a small bread keychain attached to it with the initials KH & NM printed on it. It was a gift my girlfriend has offered me a month prior after I gave her a tomato keychain I won at a lottery.
Nicocchi: We will have one week of holiday starting next Monday so how about we hang out somewhere?
Nozomama: Oh my! Nicocchi is so bold!
Nicocchi: What the-
Elicchi: Stop it, you two!
RicePana: I think it's a good idea though. Let us got to the new restaurant that has just opened recently!
Rin-nya: Let us do so!
Umi-dah: I have nothing in my agenda so why not?
Kotobirb: Count me in too!
Honocchi: Maki-chan and I will wear matching outfits!
Following that arrived lot of likes and happy stickers. Nozomi just took the occasion to tease us and I wanted to counter back but decided against it. In the end, I just typed a simple answer before getting Honoka off me so we could go to that café Eli and Nozomi always ate parfaits at.
ToMaki: That sounds like a good idea.
Now that I think of it… I have truly changed for the better.
It makes me feel glad that I came here…
Glad that I enrolled at Otonokizaka and joined µ's…
At that point, I think Honoka has a great influence on me.
If my past self saw me now, would she sneer and laugh?
No… I don't think so…
"Way to go, Maki!"
I think that's what she'd say.
Notes:
A/N: I wrote this after ready school idol diary chapter 16 (that focus around Maki being elected as orientation leader and Honoka was willing to help her). I borrowed few lines from it, like the last italics. The rest, I improvied.
Also, this must be among my favorite song out there for now.
Chapter 10: Just the way you are
Notes:
(See the end of the chapter for notes.)
Chapter Text
"You are fine just the way you are."
These words were spoken from the debt of her heart. I knew that and didn't doubt a single word. True, we all have doubts about things such as our appearance or action so I was wondering what I should do to improve.
"I like the Maki-chan I see in front of me right now." Honoka added as she waved the best smile she had. "I like the way she blush when cornered, or that way to deny things that's embarassing or the way she becomes honest when really needed."
"But I was wondering if I should cut my heair. I mean they can be bothersome while I operate someone..."
My lover paused an instant as she placed a finger on her chin, eyes looking up at the ceilling. Anticipating that it will take a while, I decided to return back to the kitchen area to prepare our dinner. Our appartment was spacious but the kitchen and dining room were in the same room.
As I kept my eyes on her, my hands went by reflex to cut the vegetables. Honoka was seated by the table, a notebook in front of her. After all, it was a Tuesday evening and being the good teacher she was, the ginger was correcting her student's test sheets.
"Either way is fine, I think." She finally spoke after few minutes and turned her pair of emerald eyes in my direction. "Maki-chan with long hair, Maki-chan with short hair; I am fine with both. As long as you don't change too much, Honoka will be fine."
A small smile found its way on my lips at thes words, leaving me blushing like a schoolgirl. "Well... I was thinking about cutting them above my shoulders so they won't get too much in the way." True enough, I sometimes had difficulties with these strand of red reaching my hips. Normally, I would just cut them past shoulder but it was all because of a certain someone's fault that I decided to let them grow up.
"You know what?" Honoka decided to stand up as I was brought into reality. It was too late when I realized there was a hand on my left shoulder and right hip. With a sudden movement, I was being lift bridal style and forced to face that lovely childish face decorated by a bright smile. "I prefer your haircut from back in high school. It had some Ojou-sama vibe to it and literally screamed 'I am a freaking tsundere!'."
"What?" My mouth went agape at these words. "I'm not a tsundere!"
A giggle was enough to make my face burn with embarassment and anger. As I was about to give a piece of my mind though, a pair of lips found their way on mine. It only lasted a couple of second but it was enough to help me calm down. Parting, she held me tighter, her hands trembling from fatigue. No matter how much adrenaline she might get, a woman will still have problem lifting another woman.
"Hehe. Looks like Maki-chan has gaines one kilogram~"
"What?"
"Hehe~"
My face turned back into the red domain as I was thinking about a way to kill myself. Before I could find a way though, I was placed down on something and as my mind was processing, I was sitting on the kitchen table's edge, my lover holding me from the front.
"Do not do something reckless as a diet. It doesn't matter if you gain weight or height. As long as Maki-chan remains Maki-chan, Honoka will always like her."
"Honoka..."
"After all, look at me!" She pointed to herself with one hand, her other one still holding me. "I literally stopped growing since high school."
I moved my hands to take her in a hug, her face ending in my chest as I started patting her head. I was always taller than Honoka but the gap turned more important as we became adult. Sometimes, I felt uneasy with my 178 cm of heigh compared to Honoka's 161. However, she always insisted I was fine that way.
"You have grown over here too..." She stated, her voice half-muffled by my clothes' fabric. "D cup? No. E cup I think."
Out of embarrassment, I hugged her tighter, my face feeling even hotter. "Well... Whose fault do you think it is? It's all because a certain someone enjoy feeding me too much."
"Hehe." She giggled, seemingly not affected by the mashmallow hell I was making her endure. "That's because I love Maki-chan. Isn't it someone's duty to feed their beloved one with happiness. Every cake, bread, sandwitches and salads I made was filled with Honoka love so you should be thankful."
A small smile appeared on my lips at these words as I lowered my head until it was resting on hers. "Yeah. I guess it's not all bad things..." Though, I knew the main reason she wanted that part of my to grow until a certain level. Honoka enjoyed using them as her pillow from time to time after a long day at work and mostly focus on that part during our 'alone time'.
My face turned even redder again as I was thinking about our times in bed. Such embarrassment! I wanted to kill myself.
"There's no problem being a little pervert from time to time." The ginger's voice brought me back once again as her face was in front of mine, her hands both on my waist. It was really odd having someone shorter holding me sitting on the table but I didn't voice any concern.
"Well... I guess..."
There was a moment of pause before I finally stepped away from the table as she moved aside. It returned into preparing the diner while Honoka went back to correcting the sheets. I occasionally stole some glance to her, thinking about these words. Maybe I will cut them past shoulder and make them in ringlets like I used to do in high school...
As I was thinking about making more salad and light food, my mind replayed my lover's words from earlier and I giggled, stopping before taking some ice cream from the fridge for the dessert. With everything ready, I brought them all and Honoka was more than happy to put her documents aside so we would have a nice diner.
Of course, I don't want you to change as well... I guess I, too, love you, just the way you are...
Notes:
I lost my files so I have to restart everything for now.
Chapter 11: Là-bas (by Génération Goldman)
Notes:
(See the end of the chapter for notes.)
Chapter Text
The raging storm was tossing the small ship in all direction. Large waves at the height reaching the highest mountains of Spain could be seen approaching from the horizon. Fear consummated the few people aboard the Spanish Nao ship. While most of them were praying with their last strength, sailors like me couldn't give up. We went already this far so bracing myself, I started to climb and untied the principal veil.
However, it seemed impossible as violent winds wanted to blow anyone stupid enough to climb that high. Holding tough, I found my strength slowly fading away as the wind blew hard, forcefully removing my bandana and allowing my red hair free, blocking my vision. However, I didn't mind that as I reached my hand for the bandana, that little piece of cloth, seemingly valueless but it had a grand meaning to me.
With lot of effort and climbing, I caught it and a smile appeared on my face. It was short-lived though as a wave hit the side of the ship, making me lose balance and falling on the sea. With such powerful storm, there was no hope for someone to save me and I knew that. The only thing left to do was to clutch into the bandana that she has made for me and wait for the Atlantic Ocean to swallow me.
"Honoka…"
[-x-x-x-]
"Say what?" I yelled in surprise as I turned to my fiancée, Maki. The two of us were living at a farm located at the countryside of Spain.
"I said a friend of mine told me she was going to the new world to trade and proposed me to work for her." The red-head replied calmly as she placed a lumber on the field. Being both clad in working dresses, we didn't have to fear dirt. It was mostly like that when working on the field. We were happy cultivating until she brought a stupid thing like that.
"But why did you accept?"
"I thought it was the best occasion for us to get a better life!" She insisted, giving a smile before looking at the sky and untied her hair. She was beautiful with a ponytail but was even better with her untied hair. "Nozomi has been at the Navy for years and now she has decided to quit that life to become a trader. They say that there are lots of good commercial route that have yet to be discovered so she insisted to make me her Bookkeeper."
"But…" I said in a low tone, looking down as I found no argument. We were just living such mediocre life.
Our fathers were sailors and usually brought Maki and I on their voyage. One day, though, as we have left Japan on a trip to Amsterdam to buy glass beads and bring a letter from the Emperor, the ship was attacked by pirates. Luckily, the Spanish Navy has arrived before our ship sunk but it was too late for captain Nishikino and my father—his first mate. A canon shot from the pirate ship has hit the left part of our Flemish Galleon and they were unfortunate enough to be commanding the canons over there.
Following their death, the captain of the Spanish fleet took Maki and I and raised us with his only daughter—Nozomi. Mister Toujou used to be Japanese sailor but he has decided to have a trip around the world and decided to stop in Spain as he got tired of far-navigating. Since there was no way for us to go back to Japan, we had to build our lives here in Spain.
"Honoka…" My fiancée's voice brought me back into real life and she gave me a reassuring smile when I looked up. "I promise you that I will do my best so that we could go back to Japan one day."
"But…"
"If I f do my best," she continued, not letting me finish my word, "I am sure we will success. Sure, you don't doubt Nozomi, right?"
I looked down once again at the words before approaching a dead trunk and sat on it. "I do trust Nozomi's judgment but I can't help but worry." I insisted, watching as she approached me and sat right beside, at my left. "The Caribbean is home for hundreds of pirates and there are storms and hurricanes as well. I fear that I might lose you if I don't do anything."
A hand was placed on my left shoulder and I was brought against her chest. It was a warm feeling I enjoyed and I couldn't accept the fact of not feeling it anymore.
"Just trust in me, Honoka!"
"I know. I do believe in you but…"
There was a moment of silence with only the high autumn sun looking at us. At the horizon were kilometers of grass fields and mountains. The one to break the silence was her. "I might get lost there. There is no point in lying. Every sailor has to take risk. There is always a chance that one would never be able to step back on ground when they step on a ship."
My heart started beating very fast as I feared the worst. "Then, just don't go…" I felt my eyes watering as my chest tightened.
"I took my decision." She started caressing my bangs and it only made me sadder at the thought that there might be a chance it was the last time she did such thing. "However, I will make a vow before departing."
"A vow?"
"Yes! I will make it official before I step on the ship, with Nozomi and everyone as eyewitness.
[-x-x-x-]
I, Nishikino Maki, vow that I will always do my best and will have Kousaka Honoka as my only love…
[-x-x-x-]
"So, that's it…?" My eyes watered as I watched a very high wave going in my direction. "My life flashed in front of my eyes… So, it's the end…?"
There was nothing else I could have done except waiting. It wasn't as if I have given up but I just felt like there was no more hope for me. Honoka was always my hope and the one who has carried our entire dream. I wanted to be reliable for once but got unlucky. If only I could see her one last time…
"Maki!"
A familiar voice…
"Maki; reply me, dammit!"
My eyes opened as I recognized the voice as Nozomi's. She was holding into the railing of the Nao from outside with one hand and the other hand held a rope. At the other end of the rope was a plank attached and it was located few meters from my position.
"Catch the plank! I can't throw it any further."
"Stop taking risk, idiot! If you have time, get in a safe area of the ship instead of risking your life like this!" I yelled at her for being so stupid.
"Stop being a spoiled brat and catch the plank!" She yelled back, something that has never occurred before. "The longer the time you time, the slimmer our chance to survive is so move your ass and let us survives so you could marry Honoka when we get back."
As much as I wanted to counter, she was totally right, so instead of replying, I pumped my cheeks and started to swim in the direction of the roped plank. It was harder than what it seemed as swimming in the middle of the storm was a nightmare. At midway, I wanted to give up as my arms and legs were really tired. However, I made a vow so it helped me. At least I was going to do my best, no matter the result.
Luckily, I was able to catch the plank and Nozomi helped me back on the ship with the rope's help. By that time, I had the bandana attached to my left wrist as to not lose it. Now came the hardest part that required lot of luck; we needed to survive the wave. Before I could do anything though, the captain took me at the center of the ship and attached the two of us with the rope at the center pillar.
I didn't have the chance to do anything as one second after the tied the knots, the wave hit the Nao, creating a superhuman shaking. It was so important I accidentally hit my head against the pillar and lost consciousness.
[-x-x-x-]
"…ki… Ma…"
A familiar voice was echoing from afar and calling for me. I couldn't deny it and found myself approaching the end of the dark tunnel until I felt like I was able to open my eyes. As my vision came back, I was greeted by a crying Honoka and a starry sky in the background.
"Maki…" More tears were in her eyes as she saw that I regained consciousness. Second later, she took me in a bone-breaking hug. "Idiot! I was worried sick!"
I didn't mind the suffocating feeling for the moment as I knew I did something stupid. At least it was over and we were together. However, one minute later, with my fiancée's sobs still echoing, I started wondering how we survived and where are we and how come Honoka was here.
Taking a look around, the completely ravaged Nao was ashore. We were on a very small and deserted island in the middle of a night after the storm. Beside the rest of the Nao was a beautiful Flemish Galleon—I remember it as Mr. Toujou's.
"I see… so, Honoka has followed Mr. Toujou…"
At the other side of the beach were blankets in which corpses were placed at. There were so many dead people that I felt sad. The other sailors were still walking around while others were on emergency boats, trying to look for other survivors.
It was at that moment that Nozomi has approached us. I never saw her this serious before and without giving the chance for me to say anything, she kneeled down and joined the hug. "Thank god! You are finally awake. I was so scared. I didn't know what I would have done if you didn't wake up."
"What are you saying all of sudden, Nozomi?"
"You were unconscious for three days." She explained in between sobs. "Even after the storm, the ship was too damaged to navigate. Fortunately, Father was notified about the powerful storm and found us before the Nao sunk." She really was crying down. It was the first time I saw something like that. "I promised Honoka that I would bring you back no matter what, even if it did cost my life."
"Hey, don't go that far, idiot!"
"But you two are very important to me. Seeing you happy together is the best thing I could wish for."
A sigh escaped my lips as I moved both hands and caressed both girls' head. It seems working as they cried even louder but I knew that was better.
"I didn't know what I would have done… everyone else aboard the Nao… they… they…"
There was no need for me to hear the rest as I guessed everyone else but Nozomi and I died. We were the only survivor of a large merchant ship and despite my logic mind, it made my cry. How were we going to explain that to these people's family?
[-x-x-x-]
Several years has passed since the incident with the Nao. Of course Maki and I took a year of prison for not being able to save more lives. It was a common law in Spanish fleet that when an incident involves lot of death, the Captain and his First Mate/Bookkeeper/Chief Navigator needed a punishment.
Of course, Father has helped reducing our sentence so we managed to get out faster. At our sortie, Honoka was there to welcome us and the three of us has decided to move back to the countryside to work on the field.
One day, as we were talking about nothing in particular, I received a letter from Father, saying that he found a Carrack and wanted me to sail with it. Of course, I was a daughter of the sea and it made me happy to get the occasion to set sail again. I didn't want to involve Maki nor Honoka anymore though.
"I know!" Honoka exclaimed as she heard the news. "I don't want us to get separated anymore so I want to accompany you for that adventure."
"Honoka?"
"I was very scared that day, thinking I might lose Maki and Nozomi. After long thought though, I realized we are daughters of Japan, girls of the sea and nothing can stop us from looking for more horizon. That's why," She gave a good smile, her hands reaching for Maki's and I. "Let us sail together this time!"
The red-head chuckled. "Guess it can't be helped! Be it in pain, sorrow or happiness, let us always be together. If we die, it will be together."
I just smiled at the lovebirds who now shared a stronger bound than before.
Notes:
I became addicted to Uncharted Waters and One Piece.
Chapter 12: Renai Saiban (by Megurine Luka)
Chapter Text
Having grown spoiled, becoming an adult was a pain for someone like me. While taking everything in account, I guess I was smarter than most people so it would be a waste to just live a miserable life. With no choice, I became a thief. Not a petty one but someone with an higher form of existence.
My story took place in Japan. My name is Maki, the phanton thief. Not many people could find my identify and life to tell the tale and I was famous on the domain.
Eventually, I was just human. As I hated to admit it, there was a lawyer who seemed to not really appreciate me. She used to be in the army and retired to study laws. Now, she was the one leading the research and was going to be the one to judge.
Her name? Kousaka Honoka! She was cheerful and sometimes lazy. I honestly wonder how come the two of us even met or how I started having feelings for her.
Since no one knew my real identity, we were neighbors for a couple of years without her noticing anything. One day, though... I was a little careless and ended up wounded, a bullet on my guts.
The trip home was a pain and already there, I had bad feelings. "I hurts..." Applying medicine yourself was a pain but having been the daughter of a doctor, I was able to stop the blood and apply first aid."
Following that was the need to change right away. Honoka was on her way from the scene of crime and the first thing she always do was check on me. I could tell she got very attached to my self and I had to keep a good image.
As I was changing, the frontal door was aggressively pushed open though and people armed with gun barged in. My wound still young, I was unable to do anything but to surrender.
"Maki-chan..." Honoka's deceived look was painful to see. She has been the one to lead the team of policemen that barged in. Her sad look quickly disappeared to make place for a professional one. "You are under arrest! Anything you say would be turned against you and any suspicious act could be considered resistance."
I had no other choice so I let them bring me to their office. No need to mention lot of people were disappointed that the daughter of Doctor Nishikino Maki ended up like this.
Well... my parents died in an accident so it didn't leave me that much choice, their belongings scattered around by greedy people who has given them bad influence.
That night, since years, I slept with shame, having to deal the look the other women in the cell kept giving. At least the bed was not as bad as I thought and allowed me a good night sleep. After all, I had several connections who could help me out of this by tweaking the proofs.
Or that I thought...
The next day, the situation turned south. The people who were supposed to support me were unable to come. Most likely Honoka found their identity and did her best to stop them from attending.
It turned out I didn't get a word to say. Even my advocate was umable to deal anything. The court ended in the ginger woman's favor and sentenced me to death.
Since death sentence was still legal in Japan, no one could object. I never thought stealing ancient artifact to sell them back would cost that much. At least, I heard the food is great and it takes a week making the preparation before the execution.
As the court ended, Honoka and I ended up facing each others on the way out. My hands were cuffed and strong policemen stood behind. Both of us stopped but no one dared saying a word. She just walked past and so did I.
[-x-x-x-]
"No, Jesus!" I mentally screamed, having been locked in a cell, excluded by the others. At least, I got lot of tranquility.
"This is the worst!"
During the following week, I had plenty occasion to rethink about my life. At some point, after meeting Honoka, I thought about finding a honest job and let go of this past. I really should have.
"Why was I so stubborn back then?"
I didn't even know if we will ever meet again. It was most likely she would not assist the execution so I started worrying.
"Will my sunlight disappear like that..." I swore under my breath, seated on the bed, a pair of explosive GPS bracelets on the wrist just in case. "...at least I would like to see her again one last time..."
Was this supposed to be a love trial? Am I guilty because I could not admit my feelings in time and retreat from this kind of life?
The others' look, I did care less. Only that disappointed look killed me. If only I could rewrite history.
"But you are never coming back again."
On the last day before the execution, I got visit. It was Honoka. The tired look in her face was a proof of intense crying. Standing by the bars, she looked at me. My eyes still looking down, I was too ashamed to dare anything.
"Maki-chan..." She started as her voice broke and tears ran her cheeks. "I really think I don't want to see you die. It pains me to think we'll never be able to hold hands. There was so many things I wanted us to do together."
"Me too..." A sob escaped my lips as I stood up and met up with her. I felt worthless in contrast to the honest girl who still loved me despite my flaws.
"I know! Let's flee!"
"Wait. What? No, you can't!" I tried to argue despite really wishing the opposite.
She just shook her head. "I do not want to be slave to laws and restrictions. I really want to be happy with you, to smile with you." Her smiling face soaked with tears hit me hard in the heart. I couldn't argue about that. I knew I was never going to be able to pay back my debt but at least...
As Honoka unlocked the door and undid the cuffs, she led me to a secret passage where we managed to meet up with the gang.
"Go!" Nozomi gave a push in the back.
"This is the least we could do! Be sure to be happy!" Eli added.
"Do your best now, Maki-chan nya!" Rin added.
"Yes. Thank you!" I nodded as Honoka and I stepped inside a car they prepared. After few hours of driving, we stopped by a cliff by the sea, looking at the settling sun.
"It's beautiful!" She commented.
I closed my eyes as to listen to the sound of waves crashing again the seashore. "Yes. The wind is really agreeable."
I swear to devote this life to make you happy.
As I had another look at her face, she beamed me an innocent and honest smile in contrast to the saddened expression from prior. I just chuckled.
"With that kind of smile, you are also guilty of a crime; you stole my heart."
She just chuckled back.
Chapter 13: Romeo and Cinderella
Notes:
(See the end of the chapter for notes.)
Chapter Text
Romeo and Cinderella (by Hanatan)
[-x-x-x-]
"Do not let my love life turn like Juliet's drama."
Being born as the heiress of a wealthy family had its share of good and bad things. I needed to permanently fix the image people had about us. In other world, life was just a political theater set by society and ranks.
At first, I thought nothing about it and was ready to go with the flow. However, a certain someone opened my eyes.
"You know, Maki-chan; there is no such thing as fate. We all build our own destiny."
That girl was so carefree and a total airhead who feared almost nothing. Without realizing it, I started admiring her sense of initiative and thought maybe I could become like her. As time went by, I fell in love slowly but surely.
We spent more time together and she eventually declared her love. I was not against it, at least and we spent more time together. It would be a pain to tell my parents everything so from time to time, we would go out of the town to find time alone.
"Papa and Mama should already be sleeping by this time." I sighed, turning around. Honoka's sleeping face was adorable. I was having a sleepover at her place because at least we got some intimacy at her place. "You know, I am not used to bitter things yet. Maybe it was all because of Mama's sweets."
Being a rebel was new to me but I got used easily. Crossing the limits of moral, our relationship with Honoka progressed very fast. At that time, I was still mentally immature.
"Please do not bite me. Please be gentle." These words would escape my mouth when we were together in her room or at the love hotel on weekends after I had a fight with my parents.
I thought I needed nothing else and so did she. The two of us would hide away from everyone like in the music room to be all lovey-dovey. I was not very comfortable but Honoka's way of leading always me accept.
"Take me away from this insane theater." I would usually say after we became intimate in the music room.
"I will one day!" She would respond with a chuckle. I saw the honesty in her eyes. Such girl was unable to lie, I mused.
"If it were you, I would give up on everything." Being very young and having near no knowledge in life, I admitted being naive. Having been locked between four walls to learn how to become a refined lady had its drawbacks. I was desperate to find what freedom I did miss.
In these fairy tail books found at the mansion's library were the stories about Cinderella and the others. I so wished to have my own price who would pick the shoes of glass left behind. Not all girl's princes are boys though. I knew Honoka was mine.
Usually, in these stories, time would stop so the two of them could enjoy each other's company. I so wished to live like that, away from people who wanted harm for us.
"I am glad for you, Princess~" She would usually joke while we had a date at the mall and choosing clothes.
"Please do not call me like that." I would respond with a chuckle. I did not want to play the tragedy of the princess and the knight. I wanted us to be the witch and the vassal who would flee from their prison to be happy.
Indeed I was a liar. Being immature, I never dared revealing everything to anyone. I lied to my parents, Honoka and our friends. Never would I have guessed these would harm anyone.
"I promise I will become a good girl tomorrow." These words became a tic for me as there were time I would take the lead in our relationship. Hearing Honoka's cute little voice as she held my head or gripped the sheets for dear life. "For now, let me do what I believe in."
She would respond with a smile. "Sure. Soon, we should always be together. Graduation is in few weeks so I will then find a job and the two of us could start a new life, away from this theater."
I really did fall desperately in love. Was it an insane feeling. The little part of logic I had was screaming for me to think twice but I was too immature to understand. All I wanted was to perceive what the word freedom really meant.
Eventually, my parents found out. I tried to explain but they wouldn't listen.
"Papa seems to hate you a lot." I met up with Honoka that evening to speak my mind. "He said we are still young have a full life ahead of us. I do not want to give up on you though."
For the first time in our relationship, she had no words. I could understand her. She was just a powerless girl so what could she do if a man of good influence like my father got in the way?
"Say," I broke the silence after a while. "Could we hold hand?" This came as a pleading voice and she accepted.
That night, neither of us went home as we found a nice hotel where the two of remained each others. As everything went well, when I woke us, the girl I loved was nowhere to be found, only a note saying she found out about my secrets.
She wrote she was not angry or anything but just needed some time to think. I cursed everything I could think, clenching the piece of paper before going home. That day, I got scolded like no tomorrow and ran to my room to cry my heart out.
"Why? Is this really the price one needed to pay to be a Princess? I do not want to he one anymore though..."
That night, I waited by the veranda, looking at the distance scenery.
"Where are thou, my Romeo?" Unfortunately, no one responded.
Since that day, my life lost its meaning, becoming a dull political theater once again. I wanted her to hold me in her arms and comfort me like always. I wanted her to touch me gently. I even missed her biting on my skin.
"Is there no place for me on this earth?" These words finally escaped my mouth. I was told they arranged a forced marriage for me after graduation. For the naive me, I would accept without thinking but now that I had a taste of freedom, there was no way I would agree with that.
The night before graduation day, I locked the door to my room and stole a couple of strong drugs from my mother's keep. Taking the decision was not easy but not impossible. In the end, after swallowing the pills, I fell asleep without feeling my body anymore.
"Like the liar Tsunderella, huh... After saying too much lies, she ended up eaten by a wolf. So, the same goes for me, huh?"
[-x-x-x-]
"Happiness was hidden inside a small box," that was what a philosopher once said. It took me some time to understand that. "Why wasn't such thing inside a larger box?"
While I was busy swimming in despair, what happened to Maki took me by surprise. I already felt helpless I didn't know what to do anymore. Without caring about anything, I ran to the hospital and saw her lying on that bed. My heart ached so much as I yelled her name while the doctors were holding me back.
Oh gods, please... I finally found my reason to live. Please do not take her away from me. I promise I will take care of her unconditionally and forgive her sins.
I prayed, unable to accept such cruel fate.
[-x-x-x-]
"Before that, please come rescue me."
My eyes slowly opened and I was met with high ceilings. My mind was blank and I remembered nothing.
"Who am I...?"
A person entered the room and explained my attempt of suicide. Apparently, that woman was my mother but my memory was not back. She then added she didn't want to see me sad, tears in her eyes and handed me clothes and a scarf to hide my identity.
She led me outside where a girl with long ginger hair clad in a cute orange dress was seated by the bench. As she saw me, her face lightened us. "Maki-chan!"
"Honoka..." Oddly, I knew her name and my memory rushed back in a flash. As we embraced, my mother cleares her throat and offered us a bag full of money and papers we would need.
"As a politician, I am ready to accept everything if it means looking good in the eye of society." She explained. "As a mother, I want my daughter to be happy though. If being with Honoka is what you want, I will support you two. Please be happy! I am sure no one will bother you once you are in Okinawa."
"Mama..." I couldn't help but to smile. "Thank you!"
Notes:
Wow! The reference for adult content were insane in this song so I was surprised I was able to write this without going M-rated. *chuckle* This song took me by surprise but I love it.
See you next time!
Chapter 14: Derniers baisers
Notes:
I recently found an old VCD containing the old songs I used to listen back in grade school. I thought about writing something based of them so here we go!
Chapter Text
Derniers baisers (by Laurent Voulzy)
[-x-x-x-]
Summer was a phenomena on its own, especially Summer break. Many went on a vacation trip with their family to meet new adventure. For my family, we usually remained at home but as I entered high school, they offered me two weeks away from the busy life of urban zones.
It was the first time I did a trip that far without anyone from my family of friends but I admitted it was not bad. While the trip itself was not that memorable, seeing the sea after years was always something to be moved out.
I would be living at a cousin's house so I quickly got there. A warm welcome awaited me and I already felt at home. Since they were mostly an old couple whose children were already married away, they didn't mind having a guest over.
That evening, I decided to have a small walk by the seashore, dressed in a simple two-piece swimsuit and a hoodie vest on. Despite the sun almost having settled, it wasn't that cold and people were still walking around.
After a good hour of walking, I arrived at a cliff and sat down to look at the horizon. While relaxing, a beach ball went flying in my direction, crashing into my forehead at sound's speed.
"Ouch!"
"Are you all right?" A girl wearing an expensive-looking white summer dress ran in my direction before picking the ball.
"I guess... It didn't hurt that much." I stood up and smiled. A closer look at the girl revealed she was taller than me, her crimson hair tied in pigtails. "Are you also on a vacation?"
"I guess..." The girl seemed distant instantly as she turned her back to me and started walking away.
"My name is Honoka by the way!" I shouted while seeing the girl walking farther toward what seemed like a vacation villa owned by some rich felloes. "I have the feeling we are going to meet again."
She didn't answer and just entered the building. I just stood there for a moment before deciding to go home. Not that many events happened the rest of the night.
The following day, I decided to help out at the couple's cafe bar. Said cafe was located at the first floor of the building they were living in, the second story being where they lived in. Since the cafe was not that far from the beach, it was crowded by customers but I was used to dealing with that, quickly taking their orders and getting their meal fast.
By noon, it started calming down and I sighed. It didn't last long though as the door was opened, the girl from the evening prior entering...only to backpedal.
I sweetdropped before turning to the old woman. She gave a small nod and I removed the apron I was wearing before running after the girl.
"Wait up!"
She started running away but I quickly managed to catch her on the beach as she was wearing big sandals, slowing her steps down. "What is it with you? I do not remember us having business."
"You haven't told me your name yet." came the blunt answer.
"Excuse me what?"
I just chuckled and started walking out of the beach. I didn't want people to think we were weird or anything. She just sighed and followed me.
We stopped near a T-shirt shop and I sighed. We were both wearing swimsuits but she had an unbuttoned shirt over hers. "Let me start from the beginning; I am Honoka and my parents sent me here on vacation. I was thinking maybe we could become friends."
"Nishikino Maki..." She said with a scoff and turned away. "I have no intention to become friend with anyone." She then started walking away. "Goodbye!"
I sweetdropped again, having been left dumbfooled. Nothing that important also happened that day nor the next three days as Maki and met several time by full hazard and ending with her walking away.
During the evening of the fifth day, I met up with her again at the harbour and smiled widely. "Hey, Maki-chan! Are you interested in diving?"
She just nodded without saying a word. At least unlike when we first met, she didn't seem that distant. She was of course a pappy's daughter so of course her parents taught her well to get aware of strangers. However, this town was a small countryside area so she ended up accepting there was no need to be careful 100% of time.
"How about we try nightdiving together?" I offered.
I could tell she was hesitating but in the end, her curiosity won over. Leading her toward the sea, she abruptly stopped. "Shouldn't we be wearing proper gear first?"
True enough, we were only wearing normal swimsuits. I just smiled. "That would be if we really plan to go far. However, we'll need permit before being able to borrow one and I do not have one. How about we just swim together for a while?"
Maki didn't say anything as she stepped into the water the two of us ended up in a deeper area. We failed to notice our intertwined fingers as we swam onto the dark area. As we arrived into an even deeper area, we surfaced.
"Hey, check this out!" I pointed downward onto the sea.
"I don't see anything."
"Look closer."
With that, we descended while holding our breath. True enough, underneath the ocean were all kind of small lights emitted by the gears the professional divers were wearing. Deeper down there were a hundred of divers swimming around and having fun.
A look at Maki revealed a bright smile on her face. We just watched the scenery an instant before surfacing due to the lack of air. Our smiles still persisted. "Did you see that, Honoka? It was awesome!"
"Yep!" I didn't notice how casual she became due to the sprout of moment. We just swam there, still holding hands.
As time became colder, we decided to swim back to the shore and lit a fire by a cliff. Luckily enough, I brought a sheet we used to cover ourselves. It took a while before she accepted to share the blanket and the two of us sat near the fire, the blanket on our back.
No words were exchanged as we looked into each others and leaned closer until our forehead met. A round of laugher followed.
The next week, Maki and I got closer and did all kind of activity. I was really happy and wished this moment would last...
However, goodbye are never that far. The day I needed to go back to Tokyo has arrived. That day, she met up with me. It was evening while I was waiting for the car that would lead me back home.
"Honoka I..."
I just smiled. "Thanks to Maki-chan, I spent the best vacation in my life."
She remained silent. The bus stop was empty except the two of us and my luggages. In contrast to the casual shorts and shirt I was wearing, she wore the same summer dress she had when we first me.
"Are you going to forget about me when you'll be back in Tokyo?"
I could sense anguish in her voice and it made me smile. "I will never forget."
"But we might never meet up again."
That was something I couldn't deny. The only thing I thought was to walk in her direction and wrapped my arms around her neck, over her shoulder. She also wrapped her arms around my waist as she was taller despite being younger. "I will study hard so we will be able to meet again. Please wait for me, Maki-chan..."
Her face pink, she nodded. "You better remember your words."
We leaned closer until our lips met for the first...and last time. Unfortunately, the buss arrived and I had to leave, ending the kiss. From my seat by the window, I waved at her while she just stood by the bus stop.
Chapter 15: Tsy digniko
Notes:
(See the end of the chapter for notes.)
Chapter Text
Tsy digniko (North & Center)
[-x-x-x-]
With raining season came trouble. As I was raising a child and taking the role of the housewife, Maki was working as a doctor at her family's hospital. We have been friends since high school and started dating in college. Since same-sex gender was still illegal in Japan, we were just living together while adopting a young baby girl of four years old.
The problem with trying to imitate a straight couple was large. She wanted us to have a stable relationship and not stand out too much. That left me struggling a lot about how to teach our little Ruby about how to make her own choice.
The girl was sometimes bullied at school due to not having a father. Maki complained about being too busy at work though so that left everything under my care.
Up to there, everything was still okay... until.
"I saw Maki with that suspicious person, you know." A friend told me once as she was visiting us. It was weekend and I was taking care of the garden. "They were way too close for my liking."
"Nozomi, you silly," I answered, chuckling. "they must be just friends. You worry too much."
My friend didn't answer to that as she just gave me a saddened smile. I swore that I would believe in my other self despite what other people may say.
That evening, she didn't come home and wouldn't pick her phone. Ruby was ill and I barely got any sleep, holding the girl in my arms as I sat on the couch, the window half opened. She was sleeping on my lap, a blanket around us. The girl was rather fragile and it pained me to see her suffer this much.
By my left was a cellphone with 8 sent message but 0 responses. My mind couldn't stop overthinking but I quickly whipped these thoughts away.
The next day, I had Ruby stay home and that evening, my girlfriend came back home indifferent. I could smell an odd parfume on her but didn't dare ask as she seemed on her nerves.
"I need a bath." her words were harsh and lacked any emotion.
I knew I was very dense but I really admitted something was off. That night, our daughter has slightly calmed down so I went to check on Maki. She was already fast asleep so I just slept next to her. "Maki...?"
No responce came so I just went to sleep. That morning, I woke up alone. No notes were left to explain anything, unlike when we first started dating. I immediately went to check on Ruby and noticed she was feeling better so I sent her to school.
I could see she was reluctant, after to be picked on by other girls again so I smiled. "I know. Mommy will grab you at school after class and we will get some ice~"
That seemed to be enough to give her enough morale. With that, I walked her to school. On my way back, I met an old friend and we had a small talk. We stopped by a family restaurant and talked about the good old time.
"So, how have you been, Kotori-chan?"
"I guess everything is fine. The job is tough but it always a pleasure to see people wearing the clothes I designed."
"That's really good to hear."
We failed to notice how long we spent together that day. By the time we walked our different path, it was time to go pick Ruby. As promised, we grabbed some ice on our way home but she didn't say anything.
To our surprise, Maki was already home before us as she was tapping her fingers restlessly on the table.
"We're back!" I tempted.
"Welcome home." The tone she was using was so harsh it pained.
"Ruby-chan, can you go to your room and do your homework?" I sensed something was on its way so I had the girl step away. She nodded and got to her room.
[-x-x-x-]
The other children my age usually said I was abnormal. I was raised by two women after all. Mama would usually tell me to not pay that much mind while Mommy always comforted me.
Lately though, our family has started falling apart. Mama didn't come home from time to time and smelled alcohol and another female parfume while back. She would act harsh with Mommy.
One day though, after Mommy and I got some ice on our way from school, she told me to go to my room. I was unaware but after I shut the door behind, yelling could be heard from the other room.
I fell on my knees and held my head in pain, trying to cover my ears but it was hard to not hear how Mama was implying Mommy was cheating on her.
"I saw you downtown with that woman! You were having so much fun. Is that how you treat our relationship?!"
"That's not true! We were just talking a little." The older woman answered, also raising her voice. "How about you? You've been acting really cold lately."
"Shut up! You're the one at fault!"
There was a moment of pause until Mommy answered. "Tell me what I did wrong?"
A very long silence folled until a very painful answer was said. "I've got enough of this unstable life."
Tears ran my cheeks as I sensed they were still talking. I couldn't hear anything though as I placed a hand in front of my mouth to hold back the sobs.
[-x-x-x-]
Our family ended there. My now ex-girlfriend moved away and left me alone in the house. I didn't want to seem weak in front of our daughter though. I could see she was pained by the events and found it hard to explain everything.
After that, I got a job as the assistant of a politician. It was rumored she was a transwoman who managed to get a spot in the government. She was a kind and caring person who understood my situation.
"You know, the most important is to never give up." Miss Hoshizora explained. "I am sure morning will rise again for you."
I just nodded. These were small words but brought lot of hope.
Two years has passed and I fell into despair. Question living, there wasn't that much problem but the pressure left by society and Ruby being bullied was making me stressed. I eventually became aggressive toward her without realizing it. Maybe I was becoming a bad parent.
[-x-x-x-]
Mommy was not a bad person, I knew that. When she raised an hand against me, I was aware she was too stressed over things. I cried in front of her though and made her sad. I didn't like seeing her sad. I wanted our life to be stable again.
Mama cut connection with Mommy. She sometimes met me though to give some fees. I could still smell the parfume coming from her.
One day though, Mama has changed. She seemed sad and betrayed.
"Something wrong?" We were at the park, taking a walk. Mommy was still busy on Saturdays after all.
She just remained silent and I didn't pry. The next week, I heard gossips about how Mama was scammed by a couple of women and almost died in a terrorist attempt. No matter how I saw that, it made me sad but I couldn't do anything.
[-x-x-x-]
"How foolish I am." These words escaped me as I watched through the glass windows on my office.
Due to the pressure I got from everywhere, I made my family suffer. Honoka didn't mean any harm but her smile and calm demeanor has somehow pissed me. I started seeing other women to forget but I realizing it wasn't going to help.
I worried about Ruby. She was always a quiet girl to begin but now, she was fully shut on herself. I couldn't ask her anymore about her life or anything as she would just stay quiet no matter what.
I was at fault. Greed got the better as well as Avarice. That was when I remembered something my mother once told me. "Holding a family requires lot of patience."
A tear ran my cheeks as I didn't know what to do. At this rate, our daughter was going to become depressed or worse all because of my mistakes.
[-x-x-x-]
I received a call from Maki that day but ignored it. She kept insisting and I accepted to talk to her. She invited me at the new apartment she was living in now.
"Sorry for calling you like this." I didn't answer. She just continued. "I really am the worse. I cheated on you and acted all mighty. I know you might not forgive me but at least, I want Ruby to be able to grow without walking the same stupid path I took."
"I..." these words got caught in my throat and took a moment to escape. "I was really sad and angry you know. Building a family with you was my dream so I hated the idea of breaking up."
She couldn't say anything.
"I still don't think I will be able to forgive you..." I trailed. "but you free to try. I do not want to see Ruby crying. I can tell she misses the time the three of us were living together. For her sake, I want us to try being together again."
"I..." she paused. "Sorry. For Ruby's sake, I will do anything."
I stepped closer and took her in a hug. "Idiot!"
She sobbed while returning the hug. "I still love you. I promise I will fix my mistakes."
"Yes," I nodded. "I love you too."
Notes:
The PoV changed a lot; I know. I wanted to try something for this part.
Chapter 16: Letter Song
Chapter Text
Letter Song (by Wotamin)
[-x-x-x-]
"Dear future me..."
While cleaning the house, I found an old letter I do not remember. Taken by curiosity, I opened it and relaxed by the window, seated on a couch while a warm chocolate in hand. The moon was out and the night was quiet except for the calming sound of owls echoing outside.
"I am not sure what to write actually... Life can turn upside-down in a blink of moment. I don't know what kind of people you are now..."
Somehow, I was sad, seeing how bad my handwriting was back then. I was never that bright question academy and could remember some troubles from when I was young.
[-x-x-x-]
Another sleepless night as my illness was unbearable. I was never a healthy girl since birth so those things became common. The envy toward children my age was indeed there.
"Honoka?" came a gentle familiar voice as a redhead taller and way more mature than me entered the room. Said room was filled with idol posters and manga selves with a bed at the corner. "Are you okay? Shouldn't you be still lying down?"
I beamed her a happy smile while placing the manga I was reading on my lap and stood up from the cushion. "It's fine, it's fine." I then sad back down and pattern the cushion beside where I was sitting. "Is school over already? I was kind of bored today."
The girl gave a scowlding look while stepping in and accepting the proposition. "You should take care of yourself more, I say."
Despite my smile, there was something paining my own self deep in my soul. Having been an ill child made me an insane financial burden and lately, I became aware of the fact. As a kid, the idea of being a burden didn't occur at all but recently, nightmares has been haunting me.
"Here, I brought you some oranges." Maki placed her bag on the low table and took a couple of mandarin from them. She then peeled them and turned to me, only to frown. "Do not tell me you want me to feed you on top of everything?"
I cheerfully nodded. It was always nice to be spoiled, especially by the usually cold Miss Nishikino. After a good minute of argument, she sighed and took the ready mandarin by the finger, offering it. I gladly accepted.
We were childhood friends. As long as I could remember, I always had a rather weak body. That resulted in daily check ups at the hospital. That was when we first met. She was the daughter of the responsible doctor and since Maki didn't have that many friends, I quickly managed to get close to her.
"Thank you, Maki-chan~"
The girl just avoided her eye contact, some shade of pink on her cheeks. "Well... We are friends so I have to act like one..."
That were our days. My condition would get better at times or might turn to the worst at other times. She would always be there though and I was thankful. One day though...
"My family is moving away..." The redhead quietly explained. We were once again in my room, taking seat around the kotatsu.
"Wait. What?"
"It's Papa's job..." She continued, her eyes glued to the cup filled with green tea in her hands. "We will be living in America for ten years..."
"But..." I was unsure about how to respond. In the end, I lied by forcing a smile. "I think it will come as a very nice experience. You will get to see new settlings and meet with new people."
"But..."
I placed a hand on her, lifting her chin with the other one, offering the best smile I could. "It will be all right, Maki-chan. I believe in you. Promise me you will make friends when you are in America."
"I..."
"Promise me."
There was a brief moment of silence until she responded with a nod.
Few weeks after that, the Nishikino family moved away. Unfortunately, few days later, my condition worsened again. This time, I was sent to the hospital and realized how much of burden I was for everyone.
One lonely night, I couldn't sleep at all so standing up, I had a walk around the quiet hallways. When I was sent to the hospital like this, Maki would usually be there as well and the two of us would walk around together. But now, she wasn't there.
After a couple of hours, I returned to my room and took a small notebook, writing on it.
[-x-x-x-]
Dear future me,
I am not sure what to write actually... Life can turn upside-down in a blink of moment. I don't know what kind of people you are now...
Right now, I am unsure about what to do actually. I am total burden to everyone and slowly falling into despair. Not sure if there is a place for me in this world.
However, I still want to believe. I made a promise with Maki-chan and really hope I will be able to see her again, with a smile while introducting her new friends to us.
What I want to say is that I so want to believe in everyone and everything. Sure, I am unsure about lot of things but just thinking back about they have done for me, I can't possibly just give up.
I do wish you the best of luck!
- Kousaka Honoka
[-x-x-x-]
A chuckled escaped my lips. "Silly me." I sighed before putting the letter on a shelve so I could find it easier later.
"Honoka?" A redhead peeked from the corner of the room before entering. "What are you doing? Dinner is ready."
I realized how much time I have spent in my memories and gave a small apology. "Sorry, Maki-chan. I was a little lost in my thought."
"Jeez! You're an adult now so properly act like one." The other woman scolded as we walked to the dinning room.
[-x-x-x-]
Dear past me,
Thank you for your words. I am fine. Also, thank you for believing in me.
Yours truly,
- Adult Honoka
Chapter 17: Chercher
Notes:
(See the end of the chapter for notes.)
Chapter Text
Song: Chercher by KOTOKO (Maria-sama ga Miteru)
[-x-x-x-]
“Did you call out for me, Onee-sama?”
I turned around at the familiar voice to be face to face with my junior. She was rather fidgetty, her figers playing with her curly red hair. I just smiled while motioning her to sit next to me on the bench.
We were at the back garden of the school. Despite being lunchtime, the place was rather quiet; as expected of a school for rich girls. Of course, I was a commoner but somehow managed to end here because of few reasons. One of them was this girl that despite being younger than me is taller.
“It's such a nice weather...” I sighed while upacking my lunch box as the other girl also sighed before taking my offer and took the seat by my left. At that moment, I realized something. “Maki-chan, did you grow taller again?”
I received a nod as an answer as she also took her lunchbox. Of course, as usual, it was filled with vegetables and tomatoes. “At this rate, I might as well eat the soup on your head.”
“Geez! Maki-chan you silly.” I chuckled while diging into my lunch.
While we ate in silence, Maki-chan reached a hand for my cheek and whipped some sauce with a handkerchief. “You really are careless, Onee-sama.”
“That's because Maki-chan is spoiling me too much.”
She sighed at that.
Despite the fact that she was calling me Onee-sama, we were not biological sister. It was a rule in this school to adress to the uperclassmen with the suffix “sama” as to show respect. This school is was founded over a century ago so the traditions were very strong. It was common for a senior to take care of their junior and there are times when they become closer, they would reffer to each others as “sisters”.
That said though...
“Say, Maki-chan.” I said, while turning to her. She was too busy eating, her taller figure envelopped in a dark school uniform composed of a black long-sleeved shirt with a red ribbon serving as a necktie and long black skirt reaching her knees. It was the normal uniform from this school. Of course, I was wearing the same design of uniform.
As she was turning to my direction at my call, I leaned it, brushing my lips agains hers. The kiss only lasted a split second but it was enough to make her face turn tomato red. “Jeez! What are you doing, Honoka? We are still at school. Someone could see us.”
“Honoka?” I pointed out with a playful grin.
“Ah!” She realized that and gave a small apology.
We were childhood friends so we usually refered to each others by the first name but would switch to this character while on school ground. Also, about our relationship, you could say it goes beyound mere friendship and not on the sisterly side. Even though I am rather open about it, she says it is better to keep it secret from others. “Silly Maki-chan.”
“Well... My bad.” She looked down for a moment before reching a hand to my head. “Come on, you have to take care of yourself properly.” She scowlded while fixing my hair ribbon. Of course, I failed to noticed that my sidetail was off.
“Thanks, Maki-chan!” I happily said as she was done and patted her head.
“Hey; what are you doing?”
“No biggie.” I responded with a chuckle, taking her in a hug while patting her head. It was slightly hard to do so because of the heigh difference but neither of us minded. “You are always taking care of me so let Onee-chan spoil you from time to time.”
She just remained silent, seemingly enjoying the moment. Our half eaten lunch boxes were just left on the side while we continued to flirt... or as Maki-chan would insist “talking about school business”.
We were both on the student council. I was a second year and I am not sure why but the current student council president want me to take over the role once she graduate in three months. Maki-chan being a first year will take my current position as vice president so that was some kind of excuse for us to be alone, pretending to be talking about work.
“Say, Onee-sama...”
“What is it?” I responded, while loosening the embrace so we could look at each others. Of course, she wasn't able to look at me in the eyes too long and quickly averted her eyes, fingers moving as to twirl her curly hair.
“I wanted to ask you something.”
“Sure.”
She seemed to be troubled while looking for the correct words. After a good minute, she finally decided to ask. “What is it that made you love me?”
“...”
“...”
“...”
Silence filled the air as we both remained there for a good minute. The wind rose and brushed our hair alongside the dead autumn leaves.
I stood up, my back turned to her and looked at the gray sky. “I wonder.” I said softly, reaching a hand for the so distant sky. “I can't say I haven't thought about it. However, I never managed to find an explanation or reasons.”
“So, you are telling me you love me without any reason?” She also stood up but then just remained there. “Isn't that kind of stupid?”
“Who knows?” I chuckled and twirled on my tiptoes until our eyes met. Emerald eyes met with Violet ones. “However, I think there's a reason.”
“Are you going to say something embarrassing such as “I love everything about you”?” She looked down with embarrassment.
I chuckled while approaching her and took her by the chin so our face would meet. “I don't think so.” I smiled at how meek she looked. “Let's suppose. I say suppose... you lost memory overnight and changed your apparance.”
“Hey; isn't that too much?! What are you imaginating.” She scowlded, giving me a chop on the head and giving a childish pout, puffing her cheeks like a hamster.
“Ouch!” As a response, I just rubbed my head and gave an apologic chuckle. “I just said suppose. It's not as if it's going to happen for sure. I just want to tell you something.” She let go of a sigh at these words and folded her arms, waiting for further explanation. “As I said, I was not attracted to your appearances nor character.”
“Come again?”
“You see... We are childhood friends. We've been together for years and both of us has changed a lot during these past 12 years, both in appearance and characters.” I explained. “You used to be such a sweet girl who would follow me everywhere when your parents were at work but then you started to become such a tsundere since middle school.”
“Hey!”
I ignored her comment and went ahead. “So, if you decide to change how you look or how you act, I will still love you. So long as we can help and understand each others, no matter these small things that gets in the way, I will find my way to you.”
“Geez! Honoka you dummy...” she said with a weak voice, face turning extremely red. “D-don't you dare think you can utter these words and not take your responsibility.”
“Come again?” I tilted my head, not hearing what she was muttering.
“N-no... I-it's nothing...”
“Silly Maki-chan.” I chuckled. “But you know,” I chuckled, taking her hands in my hands. Hers were slightly colder because of the autumn season but then I was always warmer than average. “There's no way I am letting you go nor suffer alone. No matter if you lose your face of hair or eyes, I will always find you no matter what and a future without you is like melon bread without melon.”
“W-wait a minute!” She interrupted me. “Isn't that going too far?”
“Not really. I am just proving my love to you.” I affirmed, making her face even redder before leaning in for another kiss.
“Geez!” The kiss didn't last lons as soon as it ended, Maki-chan just sighed. “That's the part of you that I so hate.” I gave a small pout at that. “but that is also a part of you that I don't mind.”
“Come again?” I teased. Of course I heard that loud and clear but I wanted her to admit. For that, I rubbed our cheeks together. “You also love me, right?”
“C-calm down. Geez! You are such a spoiled baby!”
“Says the girl who wet my bed-”
“Waaaaaiiiiittttt!!!” She interrupted me. “That has nothing to do! It was 7 years ago and it was your fault for telling me a ghost story before going to bed. Also, you refused to wake up even though I was reaching my limit and then... and then...”
“Silly Maki-chan.” I just chuckled while patting her head. “But you know, I don't really mind these memories. I still want to build more memories with you, to create a future with you.”
“Geez...” Her embarrassed face finally formed a smile.
“I love you, Maki-chan.” I said while spinning her over so we would be facing each others.
“I... I love you too... Onee... Honoka.” She said that and intertwinned our finger while nearing her face. I stood on my tiptoes as to make it easier for us to share another kiss.
On that autumn day, I was once again able to confirm my feelings for Maki-chan. I wonder how many times we will have a similar conversation in the future. However, I am pretty sure the conclusion will always be the same.
Notes:
I've been playing too much Sono Hanabira lately. Also, I hope I will finally be able to update my stories. See you soon~
Chapter 18: She keeps me warm
Chapter Text
Song: She keeps me warm (by Mary Lambert)
[-x-x-x-]
I feel safe with you...
Apparently, it was wrong for a girl to fall in love with another girl. That was something I somehow learned with time. For my case, I didn't really care that much about romance at all and thought I was normal.
I, Nishikino Maki, was someone of logic and wasn't interested at all in being that much social. However, there was always a girl – or should I say young woman – who was always bothering me since high school. Her name is Kousaka Honoka and she is working as my assistant now.
The two of us were former junior and senior but as she graduated, she decided to attend a nurse school, against everyone's expectation. Of course, I was curious at her choise while she was definitely better learning management or marketing.
The answer she gave me was a simple one: “that's because Maki-chan is planning to become a doctor so I want be a nurse so that we could be together.”
“Why?” I asked, confused. I couldn't understand at all why she would do such a thing. Of course, I didn't get an answer as she just chuckled and turned her back to me that day. After that, I didn't really bother asking and just continued to walk the path of becoming a proud doctor from the Nishikino lineage.
Despite Honoka having graduated from college before I did, she always insisted she wanted to become my assistant so she decided to work in the hospital where I did my internship at. I didn't understand that girl at all. She kept acting all spoiled up and insisted on staying with me a lot. That's so foolish!
However, I somehow started to get used to her antic and starting not minding that too much.
It all changed one day, though...
[-x-x-x-]
“You guys know you really are close.” pointed a classmate as he looked at Honoka and I.
“...” I didn't respond to his comment as at that time, I was feeding Honoka with some tomatoes from my own lunchbox. There were times where some of us student were assigned to the hospital on late night shift and would get the help of some nurses.
That day, I was on night duty alongside two other boys and Honoka. We were rather busy few hours prior so it was satisfying to finally get one hour to rest and enjoy the cold luch at midnight.
“Yeah. I love Maki-chan a lot.” The young woman said without any hesitation.
“Hey; don't say weird things.” I tried to scold but it didn't sound that harsh.
“It's as if you guys are dating or something.” the other boy commented, letting go of a laugh.
“You're overthinking it man,” the first boy chuckled at his friend's remark. “they are both girls, right?”
“I see... You have a point, dude. That would be really weird; I mean for two girl to be in that kind of relationship.”
As the two of them then laughed together but I couldn't help to notice the disappointment in Honoka's eyes. After that, she just remained quiet and the four of us returned to our tasks. By 4 AM, I was almost done checking everything. That night was a total vortex, especially since it has been more than 48 hours that I didn't get any proper sleep.
Heading to the changing room, I found a note in my locket.
Please head to the rooftop at 04:30
I recognized the bad handwriting right away. We have been together for almost 6 years now so I was used to Honoka's selfishness, but somehow, I felt like there was something different this time.
Gathering my stuffs and changing from the large cloack into a more casual dress, I fixed my messy hair one last time by just attaching it in pigtails and heated to the elevator.
As I arrived at the rooftop, I was greeted by the cold morning wind and darkness. The hospital was among the tallest building around and obviously, there were high fences surrounding the rooftop.
I noticed Honoka looking beyoung the fences, into the darkness of the city on that winter morning.
“You called for me?”
She turned around at my voice and smiled. “Hya, Maki-chan!”
“You had something you wanted to talk?” I took few steps forward and shivered while feeling the cold wind crashing into my face.
She remained quiet for a moment before finally opening her mouth. “W-well... I have something to tell you...” The usually energetic girl was acting all meek in front of me. It was unusual so I walked in her direction and placed a hand in her forehead. “Hey; what are you doing, Maki-chan?”
“Checking.” I answered but then realized nothing irregular. “It is not a cold. Maybe you are tired.” I commented, concluding the reason she was acting unusual was not because she was sick.
“Jeez! Maki-chan is a meanie.” She pouted as I took my hand off from her forehead but she caugh it midair. “I have something important to tell you.”
Normally, I was not a fan of physical contact but I was used to this girl being a pushover. However, this time, I felt something was weird.
It couldn't possibly be related to what they boy said during dinnertime... Honoka isn't the kind of person to think about love and all, right?
“Well... You see... I kind of thought about it a lot and concluded I should say it even though I am still unsure.”
“Come again?” I made a puzzled face.
Another silence took place as the cold winter wind was almost freezing us. “Maki-chan!”
“W-what is it?” I somehow took a step back from being surprised but she didn't let go of my hands. “You are acting weird, Honoka. Is there something wrong? Does your stomach hurt?”
“That's not it...”
“Then, what is wrong?” I questioned before letting go of a sigh and changed my expression into a smile. “I am not sure why you are acting like that but I do not think you have to be that weird around me. We have been together for years so I think I could understand anything if you explain it correctly.”
At that time, I only saw Honoka as a friend – an annoying one – but I didn't hate her. However, her response surprised me. “Well... about what we said during dinner... the fact that we are close...”
“What about that?” I questionned. “I do not think it's that weird to have friends we trust more than other friends.” I honestly thought back then that what I felt for her was pure friendship and that she felt the same.
“The truth is... I...” she shyly explained. “I want to be even closer to you... I know it might feel wrong in other's eyes but...”
“Closer...” I qestioned again. “as in acting like sisters...?”
“No... as... as lovers...”
“...”
“...”
I opened my mouth but I had no idea what to say. That hit me from somewhere I was not expecting. “Well...”
“Well...?”
“That's awkward...” I sweated. The atmosphere was awkward. I never thought about Honoka that way. At that moment, I realized that I didn't really mind it but then remembered how taboo same-gender relationship was for someone from a noble upbringing like me. Will I get disowned? Will my parents get shamed? Will I be able to make Honoka happy? All these questions made me even more confused.
“Maki-chan...?”
“...” I was still confused. However, before I realized it, I saw tears on her face and by reflex, moved my hand to whipe them. “Silly Honoka. You really can't do anything without me.” I chuckled. “but about that question, could you give me some time...?”
“W-well... sure...” she answered, a little unsure. “but it will be a little awkward between us in the meantime...”
I chuckled. “You really are silly!” she responded with a childish pout.
[-x-x-x-]
“Papa, when I grow up, I want to be a Princess.” 8-years old me said happily while looking at a cartoon on the TV.
It was weekend so my parents and I were relaxing at home. My mother just chuckled. “I am sure you will be a beautiful Princess.”
“Then I will marry another Princess!” I continued happily while standing up and waving a big smile. My parents knew that I was found of cute things. That was why my room was filled with cute dolls.
That day, I didn't really realize why my parents acted all awkward. Maybe they didn't know how to explain things. I was still a child but I was a smart one. After that day, I never mentioned that dream of mine ever again in front of them and it seems as they thought I forgot about it.
[-x-x-x-]
“Maki-chan~”
I finished my green team and turned to the nurse walking in my direction. “Done with your task, Honoka?”
“Yes!” The ginger woman happily said as she clung into my arm and urged me to stand up. “Let's go home! I'm hungry.”
I just chuckled. “Silly Honoka.” It has been about five years since that day she confessed to me on the rooftop of this same hospital we were working on now. “Let's go then.”
A lot of things happened in the meantime but I can just say that I took some risks and it paid well.
And I can't change, even if I tried... even if I wanted to...
Nishikino Maki, 30 years old, I like women and I was through some stuffs...
...but that's a story from another day.

burnedlilly on Chapter 1 Fri 02 Sep 2022 05:25PM UTC
Comment Actions
YayaSamuko on Chapter 1 Tue 17 Dec 2024 11:55AM UTC
Comment Actions
burnedlilly on Chapter 1 Fri 20 Dec 2024 09:36AM UTC
Comment Actions
Tamama900 on Chapter 1 Sat 19 Nov 2022 05:35AM UTC
Comment Actions
manydongs (Guest) on Chapter 5 Mon 31 Aug 2020 07:50PM UTC
Comment Actions
manydongs (Guest) on Chapter 8 Mon 31 Aug 2020 08:20PM UTC
Comment Actions
manydongs (Guest) on Chapter 17 Mon 05 Oct 2020 03:26PM UTC
Comment Actions
YayaSamuko (Guest) on Chapter 17 Tue 09 Feb 2021 08:34AM UTC
Comment Actions