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Oikawa’s not jealous.
The glass of champagne feels cold against his fingers, and the cheery music doesn’t reach his ears, let alone his heart. The happy couple is dancing in the middle of the room, all smiles and laughter. His cousin made his bride spin under his arm, happy like a child.
He has the maturity to admit he feels a bit envious of that happiness, but that’s it. It’s the yearning for that sort of feeling, not the possessiveness towards someone tangible and real--
A giggle in the air; he almost crushes the glass and that’s how he knows he’s kidding himself.
He’s so jealous even his almost blind grandmother can see it, and honestly it’s not a look that suits him, especially since he’s supposed to be glad for the pair.
Had he had some time to mentally prepare, he probably could have at least masked his true feelings, but it had happened way too fast and out of the blue for him to do anything but be a passive spectator.
When they had arrived, he had been waiting with his family for the bride and the rests of the guests to arrive. He had been ready for a nice wedding where he had to evade questions about his personal life and bet everything on his academic success, as always when the whole household was involved.
And sure enough, his personal life was viciously attacked, but not from an overzealous aunt or a mischievous grandfather, but from his best friend nethertheless.
Yes, because Iwaizumi Hajime, the same Iwaizumi Hajime whom he knew since he was in diapers, the same Iwaizumi Hajime that at twelve couldn’t keep for himself that he had bought Oikawa a signed volleyball of his favorite setter, Iwaizumi “transparency and honesty” Hajime had been dating his cousin for the last four months and had not told a word to him. Oikawa discovered it like anyone else that same day, when his cousin Misaki Hana had arrived with Iwaizumi at her arm.
At first, Oikawa couldn’t believe his eyes. There was no way Iwaizumi and Hana were dating. Then he couldn’t believe that they hadn’t told him, for whatever reason. And then, lastly, as the ceremony started and neither Iwaizumi nor Hana had told him more than a couple of pleasantries nor had given an excuse for their lack of communication, he had felt the best of cocktails, a mix of hurt, betrayal and desire to throw a fit.
But he isn’t fifteen anymore, he wouldn’t let a temper tantrum have the better of him. Oh no sir, he’d pretend everything was perfectly fine for the whole night, dance with some friends of the bride, laugh and drink, and when all was said and done, he’d politely ask Iwaizumi just what the hell was going on.
Sure, seeing another person pressed against Iwaizumi’s side, laughing and touching like it was normal, Iwaizumi all soft smiles and gentle glances made it all the much difficult.
How did he not see that? They freaking lived together. They told each other everything - or at least the most important stuff. Truth be told, Oikawa thought that they were on their way to modify the nature of their relationship. There were touches given, looks exchanged that without a doubt were leading there . And now, Iwaizumi had a girlfriend? One serious enough to be her plus one at a wedding?
Iwaizumi wasn’t one to play with other people’s feelings, so the only explanation is that Oikawa’s infatuation was so bad that he had been misreading signals for years now, and had seen hints where they were not, that he had convinced himself of living a relationship that had not been there, not even in embryo.
As he watches Iwaizumi nuzzle - nuzzle! - Hana’s hair, he realizes with a pang of pain that he had been nothing but a lovesick fool.
He downs the champagne.
Iwaizumi feels like a damn thief.
Maybe he didn’t steal anything, but he’s lying, and lying is bad and goes against everything he believes in so he’s still a bad person.
He feels terribly guilty and wants to apologize to everyone. He wants to apologize to Hana’s parents, who are terribly nice and are genuinely happy to meet their daughter’s boyfriend. He wants to tell her relatives to stop swooning over him, that he’s not a good guy or a “handsome young man”, that he and Hana are actually just friends, he wants to come out clean and tell everyone he’s just being a cover for her, but he can’t, because he knows that Hana needs him after she and her actual boyfriend broke up the day before the wedding, and she didn’t want to go and be looked at like “the poor dumped one”. He had accepted because he had been sympathetic to her struggle, and now he regrets it.
The plan had been full of holes from the beginning, the story of how they had gotten together laughable at best, their gestures awkward and clumsy for someone who had supposedly been together for months, and thankfully neither Iwaizumi nor Hana were people who posted much on social media, because her younger relatives immediately went on a hunt for pictures of them together.
And then, of course, there was the biggest fall in their plane, and the person Iwaizumi felt worse for.
He’s currently at the open bar, with that damn expression that makes it seem as if everything is good and perfect but that means he actually would likely burnt down the whole room and not felt an ounce of regret.
They hadn’t forgotten about Oikawa. Hana had thought that they could just play it with the excuse that they had wanted to wait to see if their relationship would survive before informing Oikawa of their story. She had said that, after all, even if they were friends, they weren’t married and Oikawa didn’t have to know everything about Iwaizumi’s life.
Too bad they actually had half a thing in the air, hidden between the decades old banter and the meaningless bickering, nested in the old couch they had home.
In his desire to help a friend in need, he had probably messed up that thing, and hurt the guy. Guy who, smart as he is, should realize that something is up instead of brood in a corner.
He realizes he’s been staring when Hana gently nudges him with her arm. He turns around, smiles, stiff and fake and nervous, but it makes her parents happy.
She keeps talking, the attention is shifted away from him again. He doesn’t even try to fight the instinct to turn around and check for his best friend, but he doesn’t find him at the bar.
A quick scan of the room, and Iwaizumi sees him just as he leaves the room for the garden on the back of the reception hall.
He excuses himself from the table, saying he needs a bit of air. The Misakis look at him worried, but Hana catches the apprehension in his expression and placates them with a story of one of her colleagues from university.
He crosses the room, exits in the cool evening that bites his exposed skin.
Oikawa is staring up to the sky, arms crossed. He can see only his profile. His forehead is furrowed, his eyes steely, and he’d look scary and pissed off, but his lips, his pouty lips betray the hurt and stubbornness that are also in there.
What does it say about him, that the first instinct his to walk up to him and wipe away that pout with his own mouth?
Oikawa knows Iwaizumi is there, one because he hears his heavy footsteps, and two because his body is completely attuned to Iwaizumi’s presence.
He keeps his stance, doesn’t turn to face him, doesn’t ask for answers. He feels Iwaizumi’s gaze, he feels it all over his figure. It’s so intense it almost feels indecent, with them being out in the open, with Oikawa’s relatives not even fifty meters away and Iwaizumi’s girlfriend that could walk on them at any minute.
Oikawa continues to look up to the stars, that as the nights steps in deeper brings with it more and more luminous dots.
Is that a silent argument they are having? They argue quite a lot, but it’s always blunt and aloud, never a game of silence and patience. Is it a tug of war, where each of them waits for the other to give in? It sure is a game of patience, waiting for the other to break the silence, to communicate first.
Oikawa knows that if it were anyone else, there’d be no doubt. He’s stubborn and proud, and he’d sooner stop talking to the other person than lose that dumb game. With Iwaizumi, though, it’s different, and even if it’d hurt his pride he’d give in and talk first. He’s actually considering just asking why Iwaizumi couldn’t tell him about him and Hana, about to even give up on some crafted witty answer and just go to the point, when he sneezes.
He sneezes twice, neither graceful nor silent - he’s pretty sure they heard him even inside and over the music.
He knows when he sneezes he looks completely undignified, and Iwaizumi mocks him relentlessly for that. It gets to break the tense atmosphere between them. Iwaizumi snorts at him - because of course he does, that brute - and moves closer to him. Oikawa gives him a deathly glare as his nose starts itching again. Why has he gone out without his coat?!
“You should go back in.”
He shrugs. Now that Iwaizumi has said it, he’s not going back until he gets physically dragged in.
“Look,” Iwaizumi moves his hands through his hair as he always does when he feels frustrated. It ruins his hair, that he - or Hana, probably Hana - had managed to gel back instead of leaving him with the usual uncontrollable spikes. It makes him look a little bit more like himself. “I know you are freaked out because you didn’t expect me and Hana to arrive here together.”
“Oh no, Iwa-chan. I’m completely fine that you apparently lied to me the last four months without showing an ounce of remorse.”
“You dramatic little-- Fine, you know what? I kind of deserved that, but not for the reason you think.”
Oikawa clutches his chest, totally not being dramatic. “Are donkeys going to fly? Did you just admit I was right?”
A vein pops on Iwaizumi’s forehead and Oikawa will admit that that made him feel a little better. Must have been the sight of something familiar and comforting. “Will you just listen to me?”
Oikawa makes a gesture with his hands, almost like a god making a generous concession. It irks Iwaizumi even more, but then Iwaizumi takes a deep breath, and his irritation evaporates like the façade it is. He takes two steps, until he’s in Oikawa’s personal space, and Oikawa can feel his whispered words on his cheek.
“Hana and I are only pretending to be together. Her boyfriend broke up with her yesterday and she didn’t want to lose face with her family. She asked me this morning, and…” there’s an almost embarrassed pause. “Alright we forgot to warn you, and then we couldn’t find a moment to warn you. I wanted to text you, but your parents can’t mind their business and someone could have read over your shoulder.”
For the second time in less than twenty four hours, the room spins. Except this time Oikawa doesn’t hold back and lets out the “Excuse me?!” that builds in his chest.
Iwaizumi takes it with dignity and a high head as Oikawa lets out the frustration of the day. “You are telling me that I just spent the day worrying for nothing?!”
“I’m sorry--”
“I bet you are, but it doesn’t make me any less angry.”
“What can I do to make it up to you?”
That makes Oikawa’s rant stop before it even begins. He’s in a unique position of power, since usually it’s him making it up to Iwaizumi for this or that mess he made. He could ask for anything. It could always be him who picks their saturday night movies, or it could be him who picks where to have breakfast on tuesdays. He could ask to never have to do the dishes again. He could start living a chores-free life. Knowing how much Iwaizumi, deep down, feels guilty for having lied to everybody and to Oikawa, he could probably ask Iwaizumi to bring him a plant from the Amazons and Iwaizumi would answer if he wanted it in a bouquet or in a vase.
The options are limitless. Safe.
And yet, his dumb mouth, guided by his dumber heart, asks for something that breaks the equilibrium built in years, decades.
“Go out with me.”
“Tomorrow we are literally going to the movies.” It could seem like a question that doesn’t get Oikawa’s underlying message, but Oikawa knows better. It’s Iwaizumi’s way of giving him a way out, if he doesn’t mean it.
But he means it, so he presses on. “We both know what I actually mean.”
“Are you trying to be direct? That’s a first.”
“Yeah well, tonight it seems the whole world got upside down. Iwa-chan with a pretty girl, me eating my hands in jealousy, my nephew not being an annoying brat--”
“Really? Right now?”
Oikawa chuckles and bites his tongue. It had been a bit stronger than him. He lowers his eyes, collecting himself to have an actual serious conversation. He turns around, opening his mouth to give a serious speech that he hasn’t thought through.
He never gets the chance, a pair of gentle lips on his.
Iwaizumi had felt a long rant coming, and while normally he would have offered a willing ear, the night had made him realize that maybe, just maybe, it was time to stop playing around, to seize the moment.
The kiss is short, barely there - he wants to finally sort things out with Oikawa but also doesn’t want to blow Hana’s cover - but it gets his point across.
Oikawa looks down to him, blinking in the dark. He can see his brain trying to digest what his senses are telling him, and when it finally clicks, a big smile appears on his face.
“Does that answer your question?”
“My my, Iwa-chan, aren’t you feisty--”
“Don’t say that word and ruin everything.”
“But--”
“What if--” he closes in, taking Oikawa’s chin in his hands. “we go inside, finish the night as soon as possible, return home and finishing the conversation?”
A smirk appears on Oikawa’s face, the playfulness morphed in something a bit more feral. “For this once we’ll follow your plan.”
As they make their way back, glances and looks with a new meaning between them, Iwaizumi thinks he really needs to get Hana a gift for the great occasion she unknowingly gave them.