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Hwang Minhyun has never enjoyed the company of werewolves, even he was one. He was not overly fond of the conservative and highly purist beliefs that ancient werewolf societies held dearly. For instance, unlike most of his contemporaries, he was much milder in temperament and less likely to rumble in the forest—things his more animalistic (and dumber) younger brother preferred. Most werewolves prioritized instinct over logic, Minhyun was not like that. He fancied humans more, they were less likely to punch you in the face if you told them they were uncouth (well, most of the time.) So Minhyun had decided that when he grew up, he would marry a human. But it was one thing to have plans of marrying a somber, mild-mannered man, and another to actually get one. In any case, Minhyun was too chicken shit too even consider attempting to ask some random guy in a club for his number because of various reasons that he would much rather leave unsaid.

That’s how he finds himself in the first Society of Humans and Lycanthropes for Unity and Togetherness’ first annual SHLUT Mixer. There’s a mass of people that have converged on cocktail tables in the middle of a large warehouse complex. The room is filled with the some bland EDM beat middle-aged people thought was cool, but was out of style a decade ago.The attendees, which was made up of both werewolves and humans interested in inter-natural relations, have all donned little pins of white or black indicating if they’re werewolf or humans, respectively. Toasts have been shared and stories told, the general atmosphere having eased up considerably compared to the awkward beginnings from three drinks ago. However, Minhyun was not in the group of people having easy conversation as they sloshed their alcohol brazenly in the air, he was stuck to the wall drinking his nth glass of water on the rocks. He knows that he should be more willing to, well, mingle, but the worrier in him has fended off any courage he had attempted to build up coming into this. This was not helped by how every human he’s met that night just gawked at him revelling at how different he seemed compared to other werewolves they’ve met and just talking his head off about his apparent individuality in a cesspool of agression and impatience. He’s done being the spectacle of the pack. He’s done with other people gawking at how clean and calm he was. He was tired of people seeing him as a werewolf, rather than him as Minhyun.

He checks his phone, mostly so that people would stop bother him, seeing no new notifications. His last message came from his younger brother, Jinyoung which read “Fighting, hyung! Make sure he knows how to cook!”

He looks around at everyone who’s made casual acquaintances as compared to himself, stuck to the wall with his fifth glass of ice cold water, he thinks he might have to disappoint his little brother just this once.

He’s about to leave the room when he notices a figure standing in front of him. He’s holding a newly made cocktail in hand was sporting a pair of inquiring eyes. He stands a bit shorter than Minhyun, with plump lips and a sharp, pronounced nose that framed his face. He was sporting a black sweatshirt, black jeans, and white sneakers and had the look of a man who wanted to be anywhere else but here.
“You’re drinking water,” he says rather obviously, almost accusingly as he pointed to the still full tumbler.

“Yes?” Minhyun says unsure, as he observes the man. He can already smell the scent of him even before he sees the small black circle hanging of his chest. He’s human, and a rather bitter one at that.

“So you’re not inebriated like the rest of the room?”

Minhyun shakes his head while pointing at his glass as if to prove his point. The man smiles, and just like that the seeming frustration and anger lingering deep within him crumbles in what seems like seconds as his eyes turn into slits and his mouth turns into a delicate smile.

“You look like you want to bolt?” he says after, his face now relaxed as starts sipping on his mojito.

“Yeah, kind of.”

The man laughs as he gulps down his mojito in one go.

“Well, can I ask a favor of you?”

All his senses tell him to say no, but there’s something in the way the person smiles that makes him want to know more. Jinyoung wasn’t anticipating him to be home anytime soon, he had time to kill.

“Um, sure?” he says softly, to which his mysterious stranger all but beams.

“Great,” he says while reaching out his empty hand, “I’m Yoon Jisung by the way, pleased to make your acquaintance.”

Minhyun accepts and smiles at him, “Hwang Minhyun.”

“So the little favor I wanted to ask of you is simple, my friends forced me to come to this little gathering, but he’s found himself preoccupied over there,” he says pointing to a short man with gleaming blond hair and almost glistening skin, laughing at something someone said in the little group gathered at one of the tables.

“Yeah, he’s my ride home and I need to kill some time, but the thing is I want to talk to someone, but Sungwoon--hat’s my friend’s name--is preoccupied with his little posse of laughing idiots. So, basically I’m asking you to accompany me kill time somewhere not here,” he says with an expectant grin.

Minhyun doesn’t really know if he lucked out or this was the universe conspiring to support him for how utterly pathetic he’s been doing at this whole trying to look for a guy agenda he’s been playing at for god knows how long. He’s sort of gobsmacked because Jisung is by no stretch (not that he knew) a creeper. On the contrary, he seemed utterly pleasant, but also a bit uninhibited and unhinged by what seems to socially proper. Yes, asking for company from a person you literally just met was breaching on the imaginary rules of societal uprightness and decorum, but Minhyun had to start somewhere.

“Sure.”

Jisung smiles and grabs his hand as he leads him out into the cold night.

They settle for ice cream from a convenience store two doors down from the SHLUT gathering. The first thing Minhyun notices is that Jisung likes to talk, a lot. He managed to narrate to Minhyun how he met Sungwoon back in college. They were assigned the same room freshmen year and their first conversation was them fighting over the moral complications of leaving the toilet seat cover open or closed. Needless to say, there came no winner, only half-assed jibes in the form of open toilet bowls that resulted in dodgy stares over dinner.

Minhyun listens as he talks and talks and talks, not wanting to interrupt. Minhyun himself likes talking, he normally engages with anyone he meets with a certain amount of grace, but Yoon Jisung somehow left him in a state of silence. Jisung disarmed him, and Minhyun can’t find it in himself to disrupt the unending flow of words coming out of his mouth.

“So, what takes you to SHLUT mixer?” Jisung asks suddenly, after ending the story of the time his mother accidentally hurled her ice cream at his face.

“Oh, um,” he says blushing slightly, while scratching the back of his head. It seems absolutely pathetic. A man of his age attending a mixer with this elaborate plan to finally find someone, anyone, to date, only to end up stuck to the back wall with a glass of water looking like a complete idiot.

Then Jisung tilts his head, his eyes catching the glint of the white pin on his chest, “Oh, you’re werewolf.”

Minhyun flashes hima a look of surprise. He had only registered that he never introduced himself as a werewolf, and that this might be where the ball would drop, and the casual charm Jisung had cast on him would evaporate.

“Oh, yes I am,” he says rather glumly. Jisung turns his head away from Minhyun as he settles himself by bench overlooking a small park, “Neat. So what made you think that SHLUT was a good idea?”

“Oh, you won’t ask me about it?”

Jisung turns his head, his tongue mid lick of his ice cream, lips glistening deep red in the dim amber of the lamppost nearby, “About what?”

“Me being a werewolf.”

Minhyun sees Jisung scrunching his eyebrows as he looks at Minhyun with mild confusion. Not wanting to continue making things awkward between them, Minhyun waves his hands wildly as he settles himself beside Jisung, “It’s nothing.”

Jisung stares at him for a moment before pursing his lips  “Were you expecting me to go awestruck at the fact that you grow fur during the full moon?”

Minhyun flushes in embarrassment, “everyone else did.”

Jisung nods as he takes a big bite of the popsicle, small fragments of it splintering at the sheer cold and falling on the pavement. Minhyun doesn’t quite understand why they’re eating ice cream in the middle of winter, but Jisung insisted. Minhyun had immunity to the growing chill, but Jisung was human which meant that he should have been shivering to his death right about now, however he’s not one to judge, so he continues unwrapping his own popsicle as he looks at anything that isn’t Jisung.

“Little secret, Sungwoon is half-fairy. He only had a human pin because he charmed the fuck out of the organizers at the entrance. He’s a little shit like that,” Jisung says with a grin, “ I’ve been stuck with him for most of my adult life,  so supernaturals aren’t that much of a spectacle anymore.”

Minhyun smiles to himself, “oh.”

“What makes you not werewolf-esque, anyway?”

“Um because I’m not noisy, or ‘wild’ as they would put it,” Minhyun groans, “Also because I like cleaning.”

“People are telling you you’re different because you’re more inclined to clean someone else’s mess than get mad at them?”

Minhyun chuckles lightly, flashing Jisung a greatful grin, “I guess so. I’m tired of it honestly.”

“I would be too if I were you, but I’d rather not deal with the fur, thank you very much.” Minhyun smiles through eating his cone, while Jisung continues eyeing him, “Now, tell me how much SHLUT disappointed you?”

Minhyun groans as he bites off a chunk from his ice cream, “They just kept saying that I was ‘different from other werewolves.; I had this elaborate plan to find a human to date, because I didn’t like how other werewolves treated me like an anomaly, but here I am again, a spectacle.”

Jisung nods as he finishes his ice cream with an almighty slurp, “That’s rough. Not everyone is too used supernaturals yet, so I guess it’s bound to happen, but I feel you.”

“But you went to SHLUT because you wanted to score a date? You must really be desperate.”

Minhyun can’t even find it himself to deny, he really was. As much as he wanted to fight off every aspect of his wolf, the need to find a mate was still aggravatingly there, and the longer it lingered, the more rabid he would become.

“I am. I’m also really awkward when it comes to dating, I can’t seem to say anything when I’m ‘ in the moment. ’”

“But you’re talking to me fine, does that mean you don’t find me attractive?”

Minhyun finds himself caught off guard, “Um, it’s not that, you’re just easy to talk to. You also do most of the talking.”

Though in the back of his mind, he knows this isn’t true. If given the chance, Minhyun would gladly take Jisung on the date any day. But right now, with Jisung looking at him with a wayward glint in his eye, he wouldn’t admit it.

Jisung laughs heartily, shoving Minhyun lightly, “I’m stuck with Sungwoon all the time, so I don’t notice that I talk more than necessary.”

“No, it’s okay,” Minhyun says “It’s nice. Your stories are fun.”

Minhyun likes talking to Jisung, his voice is warm, and his words don’t carry much weight in them. He looks at him warmly even though they’ve only just met, and his eyes crinkle into little crescents whenever he smiles.

“I know it’s weird that I asked you to accompany me all of a sudden, I may not be what you were expecting tonight, but at least you got a good laugh out it.”

Minhyun shakes his head, “No, I liked it. I was rotting by the wall anyway.”

Jisung asks Minhyun to follow him as they start walking through the empty streets. For the first time there’s silence between them. Jisung has stopped talking to enjoy the soft breeze brushing past them, and Minhyun just felt content watching. After some walking through empty alleyways and park paths, they decide to head back to SHLUT, Jisung having regained the energy to talk. Now, the conversation starts picking up again, with Jisung prompting an easy flow that Minhyun can get into. It’s soft and easy, the way words start ebbing out of him. Talking to Jisung felt light, unhampered by pressures to be something or someone other than himself. He doesn’t know how this happened, how a man with a mojito seems to overwhelm and comfort him all at the same time, but here they were.

They turn a corner when Jisung’s phone rings. It’s Sungwoon informing him that they’re ready to depart. Jisung smiles warmly at Minhyun, grateful by the way his eyes don’t get entirely lost in his smile.

“It’s been grand, but I have to go. Sungwoon has finally tired himself of being the center of attention.”

Minhyun feels something in him empty, like for a moment he could feel the ungodly chill of frost humans suffered. He didn’t want to become a face in the crowd, he quite liked this easy companionship with the man with the too big smile. He didn’t want to let go.

“Um, before you go, can I have your number?”

Jisung eyes open up as he shoots Minhyun a sly gaze, “Oh, are you thinking of taking me on a date?”

Minhyun shakes his hands in embarrassment, “N-no! I mean, not that I, uh, it’s not like that but like I don’t mean it in that way.”

“That’s a lot of pronouns that don’t have a noun to indicate.”

Minhyun composes himself his hands covering his face, “I mean, I don’t want to not see you again. I want to have a connection to you, because this was nice, like really nice and I kind of want to have the choice to make it happen again,” he says with a elongated breath, “I want to be able to talk to you again.”

There’s a pause as snow starts slowly raining down on them. Jisung stares at him, face passive, before he grins, “Oddly enough, that sounds better than asking me out on a date.”

They exchange phones with Minhyun saving his name as “Hwang Minhyun” and Jisung saving his as “Yoon Jisung (life changer).” Minhyun doesn’t bother changing it, it’s memorable. Jisung waves him goodbye as he walks back into the warehouse and Minhyun hugs himself as he heads back home.

It’s roughly two weeks after their unlikely meeting that Minhyun finds himself looking up Jisung’s name on his contacts again.

It’s not some by epiphany. In truth, Minhyun has been bolstering up the courage to contact the lovely stranger he met that sad winter’s night, but alas he could never gather enough strength to actually call, knowing all too well that the longer he kept out of touch, the harder it would get to call. However, under unwanted duress Minhyun thinks he can numb himself long enough to make the call.

Duress caused by his idiot younger brother.

It was a normal day and Minhyun was preparing casserole for the nth time that week, when Jinyoung barges into the kitchen with the most excited expression he had in ages.

It was odd seeing Jinyoung with emotion that was not supreme anger. Unlike Minhyun, his brother was the poster boy of the stereotypical werewolf, unhinged, protective and unabashedly violent. These traits, however, were not born from his bloodline, rather from his spoiled upbringing. Seeing Jinyoung not acting like a total douchebag idiot, and smiling like he had been granted the ability to feel warmth was, to say the least, unnerving.

“I did it.”

Minhyun turns away from his abysmal dish to face his brother, “Did what?”

“I found who I’m going to marry!”

There are many things that go through Minhyun’s mind. The first is that Jinyoung is a fucking idiot. Second, is that his brother is severely one-track minded. If he made a choice, he will, without any doubt, pursue it like a dog does meat. Jinyoung also had a bad case of being overly aggressive and scaring people off.

“What do you mean you found someone who you’re going to marry, you’re 17!?”

Jinyoung shakes his head like he knows what he’s talking about, “I mean I’ve found the perfect man for me. He’s cute and adorable and he has the nicest eyes I’ve ever seen.”

“Jinyoung, you can just do that. You don’t just decide you’re going to marry this person you just met. Do you even know his name?”

Jinyoung was not having any of it as he shook his head, “His name is Daehwi, he goes to my school and he’s the cutest thing ever. I want to surgically implant my hand in his so we can never be apart. God, I miss him already.”

There’s a glint in Jinyoung’s eyes when he talks about him, it’s too utterly bright for the boy he’s used to seeing grunt at him during breakfast because Minhyun didn’t cook his eggs right.

“Jinyoung, that’s not a nice image. How long have you even known this boy, why haven’t you told me anything about him?”

His brother, though immensely petulant, liked talking to Minhyun about what was going on in his life. Jinyoung wasn’t the friendliest person around, nor did he have a tolerance for other people, so his emotional baggage, though relatively small, always fell upon Minhyun’s shoulders. Not knowing about Jinyoung’s potential mate was something Minhyun should have already heard.

“How could I tell you about him before if only met him today?” Jinyoung says with a roll of his eyes he skips to the fridge to grab a chocolate bar.

Minhyun rubs his face with his hand. Typical of Jinyoung to be this sporadic. But that was how he was, he liked thinking he knew what he wanted until he didn’t want him anymore. A mate was a different deal. This was forever, and for all the love and patience Minhyun possessed for his little brother, he could not let him pursue this all willy nilly.

“Okay, so you like him, but don’t go spouting out marriage, just try to make him like you first.”

Jinyoung stops eating his chocolate bar and looks at Minhyun dangerously, “Are you saying he won’t like me?”

Minhyun groans, “I’m not saying that, it’s just that you’re, uh, how do I say this?”

“You can be too aggressive.”

Jinyoung actually looks offended.

“I am not aggressive!” He screams launching the chocolate bar at Minhyun’s head (which totally negates every point his brother made, surely.)

“I come off as pleasant and mysterious!”

“Jinyoung if you say you come off as pleasant and mysterious, that means you don’t come off as pleasant and mysterious.”

Jinyoung shakes his head in complete fury, “Just you wait! I’ll prove to you how pleasant I am,” he screams while taking the chocolate bar from the floor and hurling it back at his brother.

“Stop throwing chocolate at me!” He screeches at his brother’s retreating figure, “And where do you think you’re going?”

Jinyoung looks back at Minhyun with a glare, “I’m going to bring Daehwi over,” he says before slamming the front door shut.

Minhyung thinks his brother is stupid and childish. He’s too brash, too confident in himself. He doesn’t think about what could possibly go wrong and that really ticks Minhyun off. So he waits, hoping that Jinyoung fails and then he can do a whole, “life’s the best teacher thing” and maybe Jinyoung could learn to practice more caution next time.

Only that moment never comes, because an hour later Jinyoung is waltzing into their apartment with the most satisfied grin and what might possibly be the most adorable human being Minhyun has ever laid his eyes on. He’s about the size of Jinyoung, except ganglier and with less muscle, most notably in the thighs (Jinyoung calls his thunder and lighting, Minhyun called them big and bigger.). His face is angular, his sharp jawline cutting his more delicate cheeks and facial features.. He’s courteous and laughs with his hand covering his mouth. Jinyoung smiles beside him and doesn’t act out of line. There’s a connection between them that Minhyun can’t readily describe, only that it would surprise anyone that the only a few hours ago the two in front of him were complete strangers.

Minhyun doesn’t say anything when Daehwi eats into his casserole and kindly says it tastes horrible. He gets even more speechless when Daehwi manages to scold Jinyoung when he acts like uncultured swine, the best part is that his brother actually listens without gnashing his teeth. And by the end of it Minhyun is saying sorry to Jinyoung and telling him to try his best because god be damned if Jinyoung was going to let Daehwi go, Minhyun was leaving Jinyoung for dead on the streets. Though he knew in his heart Jinyoung wouldn’t let that happen. They both knew Daehwi was the one.

Minhyun felt left behind and lacking at how his brother was able to find love, or something like it in what seems to be a day. Minhyun’s always been trying to tell Jinyoung to take a step back and think about what he should do, but fortune has favored the brave (stupid) in this situation and Minhyun can’t do anything but watch sadly as his brother gets closer and closer to Daehwi with each passing day.

In all honesty, Minhyun could have talked to many of his other friends, but Jonghyun, Aron, Minki and Dongho could never understand how he felt, not as well as Jisung, sad to say. There was something about him that put Minhyun at ease, and it was him that he would go to. So with shaking finger he calls. He answers after five rings.

Hello?

“Jisung, hi. It’s me, Minhyun from SHLUT.”

There’s a delayed silence as Minhyun feels the creeping of disappointment crawl up his spine.

Oh, yeah! Minhyun, what’s up?

He finds himself smiling despite himself. Jisung’s voice still rings full even through the receiver. It makes things more comfortable, he felt if he admitted to murdering a ten-year old in cold blood Jisung would still welcome him with an enormity of kindness.

“Are you busy right now?”

Jisung hums into the phone, It depends, what is it that you want?

“I want to ask a favor.”

There’s a hearty chuckle from the other line.

Then I’m all yours.

“Um, could you meet up with me? That is if you’re not busy.”

Sure. Where do you even live?

“Um, I’ll just go to you then we can figure it out from there?”

Okay, I’ll send you my address.

“Thanks, I’m sorry if I interrupted your evening.”

You know if you want to be friends, you really have to stop apologizing. I was actually waiting for you to call, I kinda lost some hope, to be honest.

“I tried, but I chickened out.”

Weakshit. But what compelled you to call me now?

“Um my brother, he did something and now I’m stressing out you were the first one that popped into my mind.”

Aw, I’m touched and offended at the same time, it’s like winning first place by default.

“I’m sorry”

You’re paying for dinner. Bye.

“So, what’s your problem?”

They didn’t go eat dinner. Jisung once again led Minhyun to a convenience store and bought himself a popsicle. Now they were walking the empty streets with Jisung enjoying his dessert/dinner too much.

“Um, well Jinyoung, my brother,  claims to have found the person he’s going to marry and right now I’m pretty inclined to believe him. It scares me.”

Jisung hums into his ice cream, “How old is your brother?”

“17”

“A go-getter.”

Minhyun groans, “I was so ready to give him a lecture on not being too impulsive and taking a  step back and thinking of the consequences, but it never happened.”

Jisung smirks into his ice cream as they approach a corner, “Jinyoung got you good, huh.”

Minhyun shakes his head as small flecks of snow starts falling from the sky, “It’s life’s cruel way of spoiling Jinyoung. Our parents spoil him, I spoil him, and now even fortune spoils him.”

“Have you ever considered that maybe this is life teaching you a lesson?” Jisung says after taking a small nibble of his ice cream that Minhyun will admit is very, very cute.

“What do you mean?”

Jisung stops and faces Minhyun with an even expression. His eyes reflect the soft light from the street lamp beside them and they glisten with the same warmth that he remembered all those weeks ago. His lips are glossy from the ice cream and his own saliva, making it bleed a deeper red.

“Well, you overthink things. You’re so cautious of making a mistake that you forget to even try.”

Minhyun should feel offended, but for some weird reason he doesn’t. He just feels down about it. He knows he’s been a cautious person all his life, but he hasn’t fully considered hindering him from living his life that much.

“I never thought about it like that.”

Jisung gives him a reassuring smile, as he places an arm around his shoulder, “I’ve met a lot of werewolves because Sungwoon is an attention whore, and I do have to say that you’re really different. I want to know why.”

“I don’t know. I just never liked the idea of being like that.”

Jisung hums as he takes another bite of his ice cream, “Maybe it’s time you take a page from your brother. Maybe you should stop thinking and just act out of instinct.”

“You seem to worry about every little thing that happens that you forget about what you actually want. Sometimes you can do things just because you want to.”

Minhyun takes pauses, because Jisung is closer now and his voice is soft and comforting. His arm has migrated from his shoulders to the small of his back and there’s something else in the air that he cannot fully explain.

Jisung takes a final bite of his ice cream and leaves Minhyun’s side to dispose of the popsicle stick. He feels somewhat empty when Jisung leaves his side. He wants to think it’s because he likes the warmth, but he knows it runs deeper than that.

He knows that its because he doesn’t want to admit that he’s been immensely attracted to Jisung ever since their first meeting. He knows that the moment he acknowledges his attraction, that things will fall apart, quickly. That ease that flows between them will cease and things will be different, because what Jisung said is true, he does worry too much. He’s too preoccupied with thinking of the infinite ways he can mess things up rather than the things he can do to make things work. He worries over details, futures, and feasibilities. He lets the fear of what can be negate anything that is. He lets his expectations of how things will eventually fall apart stop things from actually building up. It’s stopped him all his life, and it’s stopping him from admitting that he wants to spend more time with Jisung, but on a different level of intimacy.

Minhyun sucks it in and lets Jisung settle back next to him. He shivers a bit as he holds onto Minhyun again, “I’m sorry if I’m clinging on to you a lot, ice cream is cold.”

He wants to say that he doesn’t mind, that he likes it, a lot. But he chooses not to.

“Why do you even eat ice cream when it’s so cold out?” He asks instead.

Jisung smiles, “Cause I want to get warmer.”

Minhyun scrunches his eyebrows as he looks at Jisung bundled next to him, “That doesn’t make sense.”

“On the contrary, it makes perfect sense,” Jisung says as they start walking again, “Our bodies generate more heat when we digest fat, and ice cream is full of fat. Not to mention, that our bodies produce more heat to get the ice cream to a warmer temperature for digestion. So in the long run, it makes sense. I’m warmer longer.”

Jisung leans his head on Minhyun’s shoulder as they trudge through the now white ground, “Eating it isn’t the most pleasant, but the outcome is well worth the pain.”

“I never knew.”

“Some things that don’t make sense at first, make sense at the end.”

Jisung pinches his cheek, “So stop being scared, the answer to your overly complicated problem is to just do. So what if things go wrong, build up from there. I’ve had more exes than I can care to count, but I’m okay. You’re a catch, you’ll do amazing.”

Minhyun stays silent as they make their way back to Jisung’s apartment. They’re huddled closer together now.

“But how can I? It’s really hard for me to ‘just do.’” He says, “where do I start?”

Jisung purses his lips as they near the entrance to the complex, “Fine, come here,” Jisung says dragging Minhyun to the side of the building.

“My mom did this to me when I was a kid,” he says positioning Minhyun in front of him, “when I was upset and wouldn’t talk, she would bring me to her room and she would tell me to shout at her and do anything that I wanted and she wouldn’t get mad. So I would scream  and tell her I things I wouldn’t ever say out in the open. She said it was so that I could feel more comfortable telling her my problems.”

“Then why are you making me do it, I’ve been pretty candid about my problems.”

Jisung smiles, “I want you to just do. Do whatever you want to me. Do what your heart desires.”

“Aren’t you afraid I’ll hurt you? We werewolf are very violent you know.”

Jisung responds with a hearty chuckle, “Sungwoon’s left butt cheek is more intimidating than you.”

“Are you trying to get me mad?”

“If it means getting something out of you, then sure.”

Minhyun looks at Jisung’s taunting smile, which was still incomparably warm, then his plush lips. It’s red and plump, like the freshest fruit plucked right at its prime—delectable. He feels an unbecoming hunger fill his gut as he eyes zero on Jisung’s lips, and almost in a whisper he says, “Can I kiss you?”

Jisung, for the first time, looks flushed, his cheeks going purple in the night, as he shrugs, “Knock yourself out.”

So with a shaky breath, Minhyun takes the plunge and plants his lips onto Jisung’s. It cold and wet from all the licking Jisung’s been doing , but soon enough they warm up once Minhyun starts moving his lips. It’s nice and slow, until it’s not. There’s suddenly a fire that rages in his chest, it burns through his skin and envelopes him a warmth much too intense for such thick clothing. He suddenly feels like he hasn’t eaten in days, weeks, months and it’s only the taste of Jisung’s lips on his that could satiate his extended fasting. Minhyun thinks he tastes of chocolate and cinammon, like a warm cup of hot chocolate spiked with rum—warm and intoxicating. His tongue runs through the expanse of cherub red, feeling through the soft ridges and swells as he explores in earnest.

Minhyun runs his hands to catch the back of Jisung’s neck pulling him in to deepen the kiss. Jisung responds by running his hands through Minhyun’s hair. They continue like that, until Jisung loses breathe, gently tugging Minhyun off him, the condensation coming thicker as he tries to even out his breathing, each intake still ragged and rough.

He gulps in between inhales and shakes his head with a smile, “I didn’t know you had it in you.”

“Neither did I,” Minhyun responds through his own haze. His head is spinning slightly as the adrenaline spikes settle and the haze around him softens..

“So how does it feel to let go?” Jisung says lifting Minhyun’s head so that he could see him clearly. Jisung is smiling again and it makes his heart curl in extreme fondness.

“It feels good. Especially because it’s you.”

Jisung shakes his head as he pushes Minhyun away, “Well I thought I wasn’t dating material?”

“I was lying,” Minhyun says, “I was lying because I liked talking to you and I liked hearing your stories, and you were so open and sweet and cute and warm. I wanted to stay there.”

“And now?” Jisung looks at Minhyun directly into the eye.

Minhyun looks at Jisung and decides. It may not work. It may not be the wisest decision he’s made in his life. It’s unmeasured and impulsive. This may end in a tragedy with both of them broken beyond repair, but it can also end in them both happy. Jisung might not even like him back. He might have hated every milisecond of that kiss.It’s a million things that can be and can’t be. It’s a risk.

And right now?

“I want more.”

He’s willing to take it.

“Good. I want more too.”

Epilogue 

“Hyung, just do it!” Jinyoung whines for what might be the tenth time in the span of five minutes. They’re sitting in the living room of their apartment, with Minhyun holding his cellphone tightly with both his hands, the glowing  “Yoon Jisung (My Love)” glowing expectantly at him in big bold letters.

“Minhyun-hyung, you’ve done this a million times, what would make this any different.,” this time it’s Daehwi encouraging him. He and Jinyoung are seated opposite him, watching dutifully as he descends further and further into madness.

“It’s hard, okay. What if--”

Jinyoung is quick to react, reaching for Minhyun’s phone and quickly pressing dial, while his older brother stares in utter loss. Moments later, Jinyoung’s face lights up as a sneaky smile creeps into his face.

“Jisung-hyung, Minhyun-hyung has something to ask,” he says before he throws the phone at MInhyun, who almost fumbles and drops it, but catches it in the end. He steadies himself, and shakes his head before he puts the phone to his ear..

“Jisung.”

Why is Jinyoung calling me, and why did it sound like he just throw the phone?

“That’s because he did. And I just wanted to ask if you were free to meet up?”

There’s a pause as Minhyun hears the quiet rustle of sheets and movement before Jisung’s voice comes back on.

Minhyun, it’s snowing outside. I know the cold doesn’t bother you, but it affects me a whole lot.

Minhyun pouts into the phone, “Come on, please. I’ll buy you ice cream.”

I can’t believe I heard you pout through the receiver, Jisung chuckles, but fine, where do I meet you?

“I’ll go to your apartment, just wait.”

“Okay, love you. See you soon.”

“Love you too.”

He puts down the phone and looks at his two companions who have been looking at him with bated breath.

“It’s happening. I can’t believe I’m doing this.”

Jinyoung stands and crosses the room to pat his brother’s back reassuringly, “Hyung, do it for the food. Do it for me.”

Daehwi hurls his shoe at Jinyoung’s head with breathtaking accuracy, his white sneaker bouncing of his boyfriend’s skull like a beach ball. He then looks at Minhyun with a reassuring smile, “You can do it, hyung.”

Minhyun smiles back and stomps out of the room, strolling through the empty streets to the apartment complex he’s familiarized himself over the past years.

He finds Jisung standing at the entrance of the apartment complex, his hands clasped together as he looks out. Minhyun is quick to jog to him, pecking him lightly on the cheek in greeting.

“Good evening,” he says into his cheek. Jisung rolls his eyes and pinches Minyun in response. The past two years has seen Minhyun creep slowly out of his shell of worry. He’s become less calculating and tense, having taken more chances over the time he and Jisung had been together. But he still got headaches over Jisung’s cleanliness from time to time, and larger ones over Sungwoon’s existence. But all in all they were happy.

“Why are you touchy, is that time of the month again?”

“No, I just like kissing you,” Minhyun says engulfing him in a hug, burying his nose into Jisung’s neck.

Jisung shakes his head before planting chaste peck on Minhyun’s lips, “What did you have in mind for this surprise date anyway?”

“A walk. You up for it?”

Jisung kisses the top of his head and nods, “Where’s my ice cream?”

Minhyun disentangles himself from Jisung and grabs his hand, leading him to the sidewalk, “Walk with me first.”

They walk for a while, with Jisung narrating how Sungwoon managed to get arrested for defamation of public property and get bailed because he just would not stop talking. Minhyun listens intently, chuckling from time to time all while swaying their hands gently as they walk across empty streets. Once they reach a small enclosure of trees he guides them to sit on the ledge.

Minhyun grabs for the popsicle he’s stowed away in his coat and looks at Jisung with a soft smile.

“I have your popsicle here, but I have to ask you something before I give it to you.”

Jisung pouts at him, “Hey, you promised.”

Minhyun laughs as Jisung makes grabby hands at him. Minhyun laughs as he avoids his boyfriend’s reach.

“I just have to ask you something, then I’ll give it to you.”

Jisung rolls his eyes but shrugs in defeat as he settles back on the ledge, “Whatever.” Minhyun reaches into his coat pocket and fetches the golden band he bought two days ago. He looks at Jisung’s awaiting face and grins at him.

“Before I give you the ice cream, can you do me a favor.”

Jisung looks at him weirdly, “What?”

Minhyun reaches for the band and slowly drops it into Jisung’s view, “Yoon Jisung, can you spend the rest of your life with me?”

Jisung looks at Minhyun in disbelief before he shakes his head as he starts chuckling to himself. Minhyun starts to feel the creeping fear of rejection before Jisung is sweeping the ring off his hands and placing it on his right ring finger, admiring the glint of it in the soft gossamer light.

He looks satisfied, happy at the sight. Minhyun heart warms at the sight, his hands getting soft as he makes to grabs Jisung’s hand and place it in his own.

He tilts his head to Minhyun and flashes him a smile, “Of course I will, you idiot. Now where’s my ice cream?”