Chapter Text
Clarke still hasn’t had time to process the fact that Wells was found this morning, sliced through his neck and fingers chopped off, when people begin dropping to the ground or crying out in pain so loudly they lose their voices.
Clarke does her best to help them.
It isn’t enough.
In three days they lose three kids, all under sixteen. The few delinquents who aren’t too distracted by the screaming help Clarke move the bodies to their graves, and she leaves them to bury their friends.
Now, she crouches beside Bellamy as the sun sets and clenches her fists.
“I need you to tell me what it feels like.”
“Well, Princess, in case you couldn’t gather from the screaming, it feels like hell.” Bellamy keeps his eyes shut as he growls out an answer for her. Clarke sighs, moving to sit on her knees.
“Bellamy, please,” Her voice breaks and she hangs her head, ashamed. She doesn’t know how to help everyone, and the people who’re supposed to help her are all either incapacitated or dead. She takes a breath and tries again. “Using as many descriptive words as you can think of, how does your body feel?”
He glares at her, but opens his mouth to answer, only to be cut off by a scream from a few cots away. She clenches her jaw and he nods at her to go, and soon she’s moving toward the noise, trying to discern which of the crumpled delinquents it came from. She finds Fox curled around herself, nose between her knees.
Clarke lets Fox squeeze her hand until she passes out.
Clarke goes back to Bellamy.
“Fox passed out.” She tells him, and sits next to his cot. His face is scrunched in concentration, something she’s only seen a few times since they landed twelve days ago. He’d had enough time to fuck things up for them, getting dozens of kids to remove the only ties they have to the Ark and inspiring chaos, before the sickness had hit the camp. Bellamy had seemed fine for a few days, but after the fifth day of kids passing out while working around the camp, he had joined the sick in the dropship, grumbling the whole time. When the pain hit him, he’d called to Clarke for hours only to realize that he was barely whispering. He doesn’t want to think about the instinctual need he’d had to have her at his side.
“Good.” He sighs. He wants this to be over, for all of them.
“So,” Clarke takes a deep breath and sits up, looking at Bellamy intently. “Your body.”
“Princess, I really don’t think now is the time to start coming on to me.”
“Bellamy, I really need you to tell me exactly what you feel like. Seriously.” She sounds like she’s scolding him, and he has to smile at that.
“It feels like when you break a bone, but all of them at once. Does that help?” He squirms as the pain in his arm subsides and the pain in his neck picks up again. As much as he feels like dying, he knows he can’t be in as much pain as the others around him, somehow. He looks to Jasper a few cots away, who’s only just began to recover from his encounter outside the walls they’ve built, and knows that he can’t be in anywhere near as much pain as him. When he looks back at Clarke, she’s shaking her head.
“It can’t be pneumonia, that doesn’t spread this quickly among people. I don’t know if it could be the flu, everyone’s been vaccinated- unless there’s a different form of it down here, there shouldn’t be so many of us sick.” She looks at her hands, stumped and defeated. Bellamy looks away from her and toward the ceiling. “Do you feel sick?” She asks suddenly. He thinks for a second, then shakes his head. “It’s got to be something radiation related.” She announces, and her face falls. “I- We didn’t learn anything about how to fight radiation sickness in Earth Skills.”
Bellamy gulps and tries to think through his years of school. He doesn’t remember the Ark ever even mentioning radiation poisoning. “I guess they weren’t worried about it enough to let us know how to handle it.” He says aloud.
“It’s not like the Ark planned to send us down. They weren’t left with much of a choice.” Clarke agrees. “They probably wouldn’t know how to handle it even if they did plan to send us down. No one on the Ark has had to deal with radiation before.”
They’re quiet for a moment, and Bellamy can tell that Clarke is trying to ignore the groans that surround them.
“Alright, Princess. I’m ready to hear your plan.” He says, and as if she was waiting for his word, her head shoots up.
“The Grounders.”
It takes a moment for Bellamy to catch up with her thoughts, but when he does, he shakes his head. “No.”
Clarke knows that he isn’t leaving any room for argument, but neither is she.
“Then what, Bellamy? This isn’t something we can just do ‘whatever the hell we want’ with.” She sighs and rubs her face. “We have to.”
Bellamy is about to respond, to tell her they can wait it out, to tell her that it isn’t worth putting the camp at risk, when Monty bursts into the quarantine.
“Monty, you can’t be in here, we need-”
“Clarke, you need to come outside. Now.” He interrupts her and turns on his heel, leaving the dropship before either of them can say anything else. Clarke looks at Bellamy and frowns, then stands to leave.
“Wait,” Bellamy clenches his jaw and pushes himself upright, making to follow Clarke out to the ground, but she pushes him down.
“I’ll give you a full report as soon as I can. Stay,” She says, firm, and leaves before he can try again.
Clarke strides out into the night air and immediately finds herself following the gazes of everyone left standing. Something is falling from the sky, fast, leaving a streak of flame behind it as it descends. It would be beautiful, if Clarke wasn’t too busy trying to analyze what it could be.
“Clarke, what if it’s medicine?” Monty grabs her arm and squeezes. She shakes her head.
“The Ark would never sacrifice it’s medicine for us. We’re expendable, remember?” She reminds him, and shakes her head. “No one leaves until I give the word, tell Miller.” She goes back into the dropship, colliding with Bellamy as she pushes through the curtain. He grunts, and she frowns. “What the hell are you doing up?”
“I didn’t want to leave the detective work to you, Princess.” He sneers, but lets her lead him back to his cot. She knows he doesn’t trust her, not as much as she needs him to, but she doesn’t have time to argue it now. As much as she wishes she could make decisions alone, the delinquents listen to Bellamy. They have to lead together.
“Something from the Ark came down.” She says once he’s laying down, and he begins to sit up again. She wants to push him down again, but just levels him with a glare. He doesn’t flinch. “Monty thinks it’s medicine, but I doubt the Ark would waste that on us.” Bellamy nods, seeming to have already thought that. “It might be food, or a way to contact the Ark. If we can talk to them, we can tell them we need help. Maybe then they’ll send medicine down.” Bellamy presses his lips together, and nods.
“It’s dark. The Grounders could be out there, and they have home court advantage. Send a small group in the morning. Finn, Roma, Mbege.”
“Finn’s down. He went down a day before you did.”
“Princess, I only go down when people ask nicely. I’m not down.” She rolls her eyes at him. “Fine, then Miller and Diggs. Diggs can fight, Miller can track. They’ll be fine.” Clarke nods and sighs.
“I hope it’s something useful,” Clarke leans against the wall next to Bellamy’s cot. “But knowing the Ark, I wouldn’t be surprised if it were just trash they wanted to get rid of.” Bellamy snorts. He realizes then that he may have misjudged Clarke. She seems as skeptical of the Ark’s compassion as he is.
Clarke gives Miller the order to take Mbege, Roma, and Diggs into the woods with him later that night, sends the kids to bed, and does a round checking on the sick that reside in the dropship. Finn holds her hand to his chest and asks her to stay with him, which she rejects. When she makes her way back to Bellamy’s cot, he’s asleep, for which she is thankful. She wipes the sweat from his forehead and goes to find Octavia.
When she finds Octavia, it’s well after the camp has fallen asleep, and she’s sneaking into camp through a hole in the wall. Clarke watches as Octavia, bold and careful, makes her way through the wall and around the back of the tents to her own. When Octavia ducks inside, Clarke sighs, thinking how Bellamy would react. She takes a moment to consider waking him to let him know, but thinks better of it when she realizes that he’d be out of the dropship and waking everyone in camp within seconds, illness or not. Ultimately, Clarke decides to confront Octavia alone, as quietly as possible.
“Octavia?” Clarke enters the tent and calls the girl’s name quietly, hoping for an easy conversation, what she finds, is Octavia packing a bag. “Octavia.” She says, louder, hoping the girl will have an explanation that she can work with.
Octavia startles when she hears Clarke, trying to hide the bag behind her as she turns. When Clarke glares at her, she at least looks embarrassed, and for that Clarke decides to take pity. “Where are you planning on going?” She asks, kneeling next to Octavia and handing her the knife she’d been reaching for before she noticed Clarke. Octavia takes it carefully, wrapping it in a shirt before tucking it into the bag.
“The sickness isn’t exclusive to the Sky People.” Octavia whispers, and Clarke’s eyes widen. Octavia sounds like she’s repeating something that’s been said to her before, and Clarke’s mind races with the possibilities of what it could mean.
“Your brother is sick.” Octavia frowns at that, and turns to Clarke. “Let me come with you. The Grounders have to know more about this.” Clarke sees Octavia process the request, and watches as the decision is made.
“I can’t.”
“Octavia!” Clarke cries, and immediately scolds herself. She’d promised herself to try and keep this quiet. “You know I won’t tell Bellamy. But you can’t just go alone, I won’t let you.” Clarke can see Octavia slowly taking the defensive, and she jumps to fix it before it’s too late. “Please, Octavia, this effects everyone. Let me help you help them.”
Octavia frowns. “I wasn’t going to leave until morning. I just wanted to get packed so I could leave as early as possible, before dawn.” Clarke nods. “I’ll- I’ll come get you when I’m ready to head out. Be ready.” With that, Octavia turns away and continues packing, and Clarke makes to leave. Just as she reaches the tent’s flap, Octavia calls to her again. “Thank you for taking care of my ass of a brother. He means well.” Clarke gives Octavia a small smile and nods, leaving the tent to gather ration packs and water bottles. She finds herself ready to leave within minutes, and decides to check on the sick one more time before she rests just long enough to be ready to leave with Octavia.
As she makes her round around the dropship, she notices that the delinquents seem- calmer. No one writhes with pain in their sleep, no one groans as she wipes sweat from their heads. They seem peaceful.
It’s concerning.
She wonders after it as she finishes checking on the last few- she leaves Bellamy for last, as he seems to be dealing with the least amount of pain, somehow. As she approaches his cot, she sees that just as the others have, he’s relaxed. He’s unmoving, but he doesn’t look tense as she comes closer.
That is, until she reaches over to touch his forehead and her fingers find nothing but cloth.
A shirt, rolled up to look like a head.
Clarke decides right then and there that she hates Bellamy Blake.
Her first instinct is to tell Octavia, which leads her back to Octavia’s tent. She hopes the girl hasn’t fallen asleep yet.
As she walks into the tent, she realizes that that isn’t something she should be worried about.
Octavia’s tent is empty.
Clarke decides that the Blake family will be the death of her.
And then she’s sprinting into the dropship and shaking Finn’s shoulder.
“How do you feel?” She asks as soon as his eyes open. He blinks wearily at her and shrugs.
“Better, I think?”
“Good, get up. Bellamy took off after that thing that dropped and Octavia disappeared too. Get ready, we leave in ten.” She leaves him to collect himself and runs to find Miller. “Miller!” She says as she pulls on his arm. He groans and cracks an eye open, but sits up when he takes in her widened eyes. “Bellamy and Octavia are missing, and I know they’re not together. We’re going after them, get ready to go.”
Clarke leaves Miller’s tent and frantically tries to think of what else she needs to do to take care of camp before she leaves. Making a split second decision, she goes to Monty and wakes him, leaving him with instructions to send Diggs, Roma, and Mbege after Miller if he isn’t back by mid day. Monty nods and asks where she’s going, but she just shakes her head. “I have to go, Monty.”
Within ten minutes she’s sending Miller after Octavia, trusting his tracking skills to find her. He gives her a silent nod and takes off into the woods. Finn watches her carefully, and when she nods at him, he leads her in the opposite direction, after what he’s sure are Bellamy’s foot prints.
It doesn’t take long to find him.
He’s bent over a log that fallen, and he’s heaving into the grass like he’s just run a 5k without training for it. Clarke is at his side in an instant, but Finn hangs back, hesitant and watchful.
“Bellamy, what the hell is this? What could be so important that you had to leave camp while you’re still sick?” She demands as she pulls him off of the log and into her lap. He scoffs and tries to push away from her, but she holds on. “What is going on, Bellamy?” He frowns as he realizes Finn is close by and pushes away from her, hard, and lands on the ground. When Clarke tries to help him back into a sitting position he shrugs her off, staring hard at Finn and pulling himself upright. Soon, he’s standing, glaring at Finn like he’s just punched Octavia.
“Finn. Why are you outside of camp?”
“I’m out here with Clarke,” Finn levels a pointed glance at Clarke, who is dumbfounded. Bellamy was just laying on the ground, looking awful, and now he’s standing tall, challenging Finn. Bellamy also glances at Clarke, but his attention remains on Finn. “She asked me to come with her to find you after you disappeared.”
“It’s none of your business why I leave camp. You can go back now.” Bellamy turns around and begins to walk away, Clarke hot on his heels, until she realizes that Finn has left. She tries to see him through the trees, but any trace of Finn is gone. She shakes her head and follows Bellamy closely, not wanting to lose him too.
“Now that you’ve proven to Finn that you’re as much of an asshole as he already thought you were, will you please tell me why you left? What’s in that pod, Bellamy?” Clarke stumbles as she tries to keep up. She can’t begin to try to decipher his sudden change in behavior right now, not while he’s being unresponsive even as they trek through the woods together. Finally, she grabs his arm and tugs, spinning him around. “Tell me what’s going on, right now. Now, Bellamy.”
He takes his time, looking her up and down, taking in her offensive stance. He knows she’s going to put up a fight. She isn’t letting this go. Finally, his whole body seems to sag.
“I shot Jaha.” She hears his confession and her breath catches. She can hear her heart hammering in her ears as she realizes she’s standing in front of a murderer.
“Why?” She whispers, and he licks his lips, staring over her shoulder.
“I- I found out they were sending Octavia to Earth- I couldn’t let her go alone.” He pauses, closing his eyes for a second and taking a deep breath. “Someone came to me with a deal- do this, kill him, and they’d get me on the dropship.” He gulps, watching her take it in. “And I did it.”
“Wells’ dad….” Clarke tries to process everything he’s said, and feels the pain of losing Wells all over again. Thelonious wasn’t someone she was very close to, but she did grow up knowing him. He’s the closest thing to an uncle she ever had.
But he also floated her father.
Clarke remembers being in solitary, wishing she could see Thelonious one last time, just so that she could kill him. She isn’t sure she wouldn’t have, given the chance. She looks back at Bellamy, who’s looking anywhere but at her face.
“Good.”
It comes out as barely a whisper, but Bellamy hears it loud and clear.
He takes her in again, sees her determined look, a challenge. You shot him and I applaud you. Who’s worse? She seems to say without words. He doesn’t let himself get into it.
She’s surprised him again.
He definitely misjudged her.
“You did it for your sister, just like everything else you’ve ever done. No one can blame you for that. Besides, he sent us down here to die and killed half of our parents.” She juts her chin out. “If and when the Ark comes down, they won’t touch you. I won’t let them.” When his only response is the gawk at her, she moves past him a few steps. “Octavia is missing. I sent Miller after her. I can find the pod on my own from here.” When he looks to her for confirmation, she nods, and he takes off into the woods. Just as Finn had done before, he disappears.
When Clarke finds the pod, there’s a girl climbing out, holding her head and swearing. “Oh my God” Clarke breathes, and the girl’s head snaps up.
The girl nods, says “Hi,” and begins to walk toward Clarke, but falls at the last second. Clarke panics, mind going back to when the first of the hundred began collapsing. She calms when she sees the blood on the girl’s head. Probably just a concussion. She catches the girl and helps her sit, sure to keep a hand on her back in case she slumps over.
“Can I ask why they sent you?”
“They didn’t,” The girl shakes her head and stands carefully. “Abby Griffin did. Is this…. Rain?” Despite the mention of her mom, Clarke smiles and nods.
“Welcome home.”
They hear Clarke’s name called, and Clarke relaxes. “That’s me. Clarke Griffin.” Clarke offers her hand to the girl, who nods and takes it.
“Raven Reyes. Your mom sent me- my radio!” Raven pulls away from Clarke and opens the pod door back up. She grins and pulls a radio out of the pod, holding it up for Clarke to see. Clarke sighs, relief washing over her. It’s about time they catch a break.
“Clarke?” The voice from the woods calls again, and Clarke turns around to see Finn stepping out of the leaves. She smiles at him, but she’s lost to him as he sees Raven.
He says Raven’s name at the same time she says his. He runs to her and takes her into his arms, and they kiss. Clarke looks away, trying to give them their moment. They talk for a moment, and Clarke gathers that Raven built the pod from scrap and that she is very, very in love with Finn Collins. Raven falls again, and this time, Finn catches her.
“We need to get her and the radio back to the dropship. I sent Bellamy after Octavia, we need to be ready for them when they get back.” Clarke looks at the sky and sighs. It’s almost mid-day, somehow, which means Monty will be sending the second search party for Octavia soon. “The sooner we get back the better.”
As they walk, Raven tells them about the council’s plan to vote to kill three hundred people. “Today,” she says, and they walk with a bit more urgency after that.
The camp is nearly empty when they walk through the gates, Monty frantically trying to open them alone. “Where is everyone?” Clarke demands. Monty shakes his head.
“Everyone who was sick suddenly recovered, and like, took off . Jasper said something about being hungry, and then the gates were open and they were all running. Everyone else freaked out and went after them. Mbege, Roma, and Diggs are all still here, somehow. I figured I’d better keep them here until someone came back- you or Bellamy.” Monty spits it all out for her so quickly she asks him to repeat some of it.
“You made a good call, keeping them here.” She sighs and folds her arms over her chest. “Finn, bring Raven into the dropship. I’ll be there to stitch her up in a few minutes. Monty, Raven brought a radio with her in the pod that she came in. Try to get it set up while I stitch her up.” Clarke makes to move away, but Monty stops her.
“Did you find Bellamy?” He asks, eyes wide with fear. Clarke realizes that even Monty, pacifist that he is, looks up to and respects their rebellious leader.
“Yeah, I sent him to find Octavia. We need to hold down the fort, tell Mbege and them to come find me, okay?” He nods and begins to walk away, but pauses when she calls him one last time. “Thank you.” She says, and he beams.
The stitches take no time at all, and after Clarke tests Raven for a concussion (which determines that Raven is fine), Raven is practically running to meet Monty and work on the radio. Clarke asks Finn if Raven will need her own tent, and he says absolutely not, to which they both laugh. Mbege, Diggs, and Roma find Clarke in the dropship, and she tells them to stay put, no matter what. She assigns them to guard duty, and Diggs salutes at her with a smile that she returns.
By the time the delinquents start making their way back to camp, the sun has almost set, and Clarke’s nerves are absolutely fried . They come with food in tow, and fires are rebuilt quickly. It’s not long before almost everyone has been fed and people begin to peel off towards their individual tents. Clarke stays awake, despite her lack of sleep the night before, and waits for the rest of the kids to return. She’s pacing by the gates by the time Roma finds her.
“Is it just me, or did all the sick kids, like, disappear?” Roma wonders aloud. Clarke freezes. She doesn’t know how she didn’t realize it before. “All the healthy people are back already, but everyone who was out of commission yesterday is still gone.” Clarke gives Roma a tight nod, and goes to find Monty.
He’s on the second floor of the dropship, leaning over the radio with Raven. “Clarke,” he smiles. “We should be talking to them in a few minutes.”
“The people who were sick aren’t back yet.” Clarke says in lieu of an answer, and Monty’s face falls. “Miller and Octavia are still gone too.” Monty scrambles out of his seat and leaves Raven to work on the radio.
“Do you think something happened?”
“I don’t know. But I doubt the kids who are still gone are spending their time looking for Octavia and Miller.” Clarke sighs. “I think it’s time to send Mbege, Diggs, and Roma out to look for them. I hate sending them out when it’s dark-”
“It’s what Bellamy would do.” Monty says, determination steeling his face. Clarke nods, and Monty opens the hatch to the ladder. They make their way down together, and find the three people they plan to send out. Clarke explains to them the situation, and the three look at each other.
“You’re sure you want us to go now?” Mbege asks, and Clarke nods grimly.
“It’s not my favorite thing to do, but we’ve waited long enough. You’ll need weapons, and food, and I’ll put together a first aid kit in case anyone is hurt.” She’s worried, more worried than she can let on. She knows Monty can tell, but the three kids standing in front of her have no idea. “Please be careful.” She adds quietly. Monty stays with them and makes sure they get weapons and food and water while she spares whatever she can for their first aid kit. When they’re packed and ready to go, she sends them off, and Monty holds her hand.
“They’ll all come back, you know.” He assures her, and she frowns. They might. But she knows not all of them will. She makes a morbid mental note to find the shovels and have them ready. “Go to sleep, Clarke. I’ll wait up for them. You did good today.” He smiles kindly and nudges her shoulder. “You saved three hundred people’s lives. Go sleep.”
She does sleep, but only fitfully, and only for a few hours. She’s woken by howling in the early hours of the morning, and the haunting sound of it echoes off the surrounding hills and keeps her awake until the sun rises.