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1.
Rose wakes gradually the morning after her first time with Finn, enjoying the sense of contentment and happiness. She is still sleepy and doesn’t want to move too much, so she just slides her arm across Finn’s broad chest. He is still fast asleep, a look of peace on his face. Rose did not think that in the midst of a war she could feel like this but she does.
She studies him, noting, not for the first time, how handsome he is, as well as how fiercely loyal and heroically brave he can be. He isn’t perfect though, and neither is she. Rose thinks that is why they work well together. She is able to calm his fears and he is able to encourage her confidence to take risks.
Rose feels blissful, despite the fact they are crammed into a small double bunk, wrapped in worn sheets and threadbare blankets, sharing one lumpy pillow. The fight against the First Order continues, and they don’t have much more time to sleep before they get back to work. So Rose savours the moment, fleeting as it is, wanting to remember these feelings so that she can recall them later.
The neon clock blinks forward a minute and Rose realises sadly that the alarm will go off soon. Too soon. She wonders what it would be like if they were two normal people, on an ordinary planet, in a galaxy that was peaceful. Able to do what they wanted without fear, to not spend their days fighting. To be able to sleep in a proper bed, in a home of their own, perhaps with a pet or two. It seems like an impossible dream. But Rose hopes that one day, it will be true.
The alarm blares, interrupting her daydream, and Finn cracks one eye open and then the other, blinking tiredly.
He smiles bashfully at her, “Good morning.”
”Mmm, yes, it is very good.” Rose blushes as she leans in for a kiss.
2.
Rose is only just a teenager the first time she fires a blaster. She’d never seen one up close before, her knowledge of weapons coming from holo-movies. So, when she first sets eyes on the blaster, it takes her a few moments to realise what it is. She is in the alleyway behind her home, the rough path runs at the back of all the houses on her street, and she is calling for her pet cat, Neko. He is a dark purple, long haired cat who often explores the alley. The blaster lies in the middle of the path, a dark, steely grey, incongruous against the light, sandy colour of the floor.
Neko has come over to where she is standing, he sniffs the blaster before weaving through her legs, rubbing up against her.
“Meow.”
”I know. Someone must have dropped it.” She says quietly to Neko, glancing around nervously to see if there is anyone else around. It is only the two of them.
“Meow.”
Neko is probably asking for a treat but Rose imagines he is telling her to stay away from it.
“I’m just going to look at it.” She’s curious, always has been, always will be, especially about how things work. Bending down, she picks it up, it’s heavy in her hand. It feels....menacing. Rose wonders how many this has killed.
“You’re holding it wrong.” She is startled by a voice behind her, it’s her older sister Paige. She is leaning against the door, arms crossed.
“How do you know?”
Paige probably thinks because she’s seen it in a holo-movie that she’s practically a sniper.
“Because I know how to shoot it.” Paige replies simply, with all the mystery of an older sibling.
“No way.” Rose shakes her head. “Where did you learn that?!”
”Older brother of a friend, couple of weeks ago. He’s gone off to join the Resistance.”
“Seriously?!” Rose asks in disbelief. The Resistance is a big deal to them and Rose feels a twinge of hurt that Paige hadn’t informed her immediately.
“I can show you.” Paige pushes herself gracefully off the side of the door and catches Neko, bringing him up for a cuddle and a kiss, before placing him safely inside.
She shuts the door, and walks towards Rose, “We’ll need something to aim at,” she looks around and spots a discarded container, “Perfect.”
Stepping behind her sister, she places her arms around her, positioning the blaster properly in Rose’s hands, “Like this, see? Keep your hands steady, always use two hands if possible, and focus on your target.” Rose nods absently, feeling her palms start to sweat. “Then you just pull the trigger.”
She does, falling backwards slightly into her sister’s embrace, the container exploding from the blast. “Wow.” She whispers. “That was....”
“I know, right?”
“Scary.”
“I was gonna say dangerous and cool, but let’s go with scary. You alright?”
“Yeah.” Rose breathes, lowering the blaster.
She never forgets her sister’s instructions and sometimes, when she is very scared, she can still feel her Paige’s arms around her, guiding her gently.
3.
The first time Rose dances with Rey, it is in huge, ornate ballroom decorated extravagantly. It is a celebration for the heroes of the Resistance, a well earned party after their defeat of the First Order. No expense has been spared, they are to enjoy the most expensive alcohol and the most delicious food that the galaxy has to offer, with the most talented musicians playing live. It is over the top but Rose cannot stop smiling, the happiness is infectious.
Rey grabs her from behind, her arms sneaking around Rose’s waist, and presses a kiss to her neck.
“Dance?” She asks breathlessly, a blush staining her cheeks.
“Ok!” They have never danced together before, they’ve done....other stuff, but not this. After all, there has been no time for dancing. But now, they are free to do as they wish, and they wish to dance.
It is a mid-tempo song, with a good beat, and Rey glances around, a slight frown as she studies the other dancers. She holds her hands at Rose’s waist, copying what she can see, and Rose does the same. They sway their hips and bob around, not caring how they look, pressing up against each other. The song ends and a faster one starts up, they continue to move any way that they feel.
Another song, and another, and then Rey whispers into Rose’s ear, “Want some fresh air? It’s so hot in here!”
”Yes.” Rose has barely spoken before they are making their way through the crowd, hands clasped, faces red from exertion.
The night air outside is wonderfully cool and crisp. The hold hands as they step carefully down the marble staircase and into the lush gardens of the palatial palace. They are wearing long, luxurious gowns and uncomfortable but stylish shoes, all courtesy of their grateful hosts. But neither Rey nor Rose are enamoured by their clothes, and soon they are kicking off their high-heels and running barefoot through the damp grass of the lawn.
They stop in the middle of the lawn, the noise from the party muted, in the warm glow of the moonlight. Rose reaches down and pulls up the hem of her dress, tucking it into her belt, Rey laughs and follows suit, until they both have short, puffy skirts.
“Much better.” Rey murmurs as she leans for a kiss, they slide down onto the grass, not caring about the dew.
In that moment, and later on that night, the war and the First Order seems like a horrible nightmare, like a dream they have woken from.
4.
Rose can’t believe it when she is promoted. A nervous part of her wonders if they made a mistake, if there is another Rose Tico in the Resistance who is to head their own division, and they have simply got the wrong one. But there is no mistake, she is in charge of her own battleship, the leader of a group of fighters, she has to make decisions and to take responsibility. Rose doesn’t feel ready but if she has learned anything, it’s that there is no ‘being ready’ in war, there is only adapting and moving forward.
The bridge of the ship is filled with the gentle murmurs of the crew and the soft beeps of the ship. Rose stares out of the main windows, a group of small but deadly First Order vessels are heading towards them, distant right now but threatening none the less. Rose finds herself thinking of her sister Paige, gone so long ago but always at the back of her mind, and wonders what she would make of this.
I always knew you’d end up in charge one day. Paige isn’t speaking to her, of course, but it’s what Rose imagines she would say. She can still hear her sister’s voice so clearly.
You are going to make such a great leader. The First Order won’t know what hit ‘em.
She pictures her sister’s face, that beautiful smile and her kind but mischievous eyes. She remembers the last hug they had, the last time they laughed together. It feels like forever, and she feels so old. A painful ache spreads through her, and for a brief moment, it feels as if Paige has just died - a sharp sadness that makes her want to gasp.
But she is not that young woman anymore, it has been years since that terrible day. Paige is gone, yes, but she is always with her and Rose knows that she is fighting for Paige. Her fight against the First Order is not just an ideological one, it is personal. She is not trying to get revenge, she is trying to get justice. And for her, justice is destruction of the First Order.
She focuses on the view in front of her, endless stars, part of a vast galaxy. One she is working to protect- for herself, for Paige, for everyone in the galaxy who has no voice. For the greater good.
“Four minutes.” Her second-in-command announces, indicating they aren’t far away now. “Ma’am?”
Rose turns to him, swivelling her chair, shoulders back and head high. Any sense of nervousness has gone, she knows exactly what she has to do.
“Engage.” She orders confidently, “Let’s show them what we’ve got.”
5.
Rose cannot remember the first time she understands that she has a talent for mechanics. It is as though she has always known, certain things just make sense to her. However, she distinctly remembers when she first fixed something. She was a young child, inquisitive about the world around her, and her favourite droid was faltering.
It was not serious, and it could be fixed easily, but Rose’s parents noticed she was interested. As they opened up the droid, revealing the complex tangle of parts inside, Rose scrambled forward. It was a mess inside, wires overlapping everywhere, but this did not deter her. Rose studied it carefully, the solution clicking into place, and she reached out tentatively removing one wire and replacing it with another.
Her parents looked on proudly, pleased with their youngest child’s talent. They saw that she had an affinity for mechanics and made it their mission to provide her with the tools she would need to develop her interest. So, Rose experimented, learnt from her mistakes, and built up a repertoire of skills. As she grew into a teenager and then a young woman, it became clear that this was her calling. All she needed was to be called.
In her early twenties, it was like a switch had flicked - she knew with a certainty she had never felt before, that her destiny was to fight with the Resistance. Her talents were welcomed with open arms and she settled into a world where her aptitude for mechanics was useful.
For the first few years, she is just a part of the team, a vital part but nevertheless part of a working team. It is during a vicious battle, their ship battered by a brutal attack from the First Order, that she finally shines.
“We need to tell the bridge to retreat, the engines are going to blow!” Her commander shouts over the blaring sirens.
”NO!” Rose shrieks back, desperately, “I can fix this! I know I can, just give me a few minutes!”
Her commander glares at her, but nods quickly, willing to trust Rose’s skills, “What do you need?”
And she tells him, they work together, racing against time to hold their shields and keep their engines going. And it works. It is then, as they sigh in relief, that Rose truly appreciates her gift for first time.