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At first, after getting back together, things were great. Alec and Magnus had talked out their issues, they'd spent all their free time together. They were trying their best to get their relationship back on track.
But all the while, something still felt off to Alec. It's been over a month since they'd made up, and he knew their problems wouldn't go away that quickly, but he felt like there was something underneath the surface, threatening to bring them to an end.
And then it all came back up.
**
It's one of their harder weeks. They've both had busy schedules, leaving no time to be in the same place at the same time. Alec knew Magnus had been distant during their time apart, not picking up when he called him, asking for Alec to spend his nights at the institute so they could both get enough sleep. But he hadn't thought anything of it until he came back to the loft.
Alec knew they were both free today, so he was surprised when he closed the door behind him and all he saw was darkness. The only light on coming from Magnus' bed room. Of course, out of habit, Alec's mind went to that deep, low, warm place that happens when there's only a bedroom light on. But as he walked towards where he knew Magnus was, he felt a different vibe.
His stomach in knots now, he knows he isn't going to like what's about to happen.
"Magnus?" he calls out, as he enters the bed room.
"Alec."
Magnus is sitting on the edge of the bed, hunched over, head in his hands.
Alec can't help but feel the tightness in his heart.
"Are you okay?" he asks quietly, but he knows Magnus heard him
It took a minute for Magnus to respond, and Alec tried to control the beating of his heart. The fear in his stomach.
"I think we should... break up." Magnus finally said, lifting his head to look at Alec
In half a second, Alec can feel the build up behind his eyes, threatening to spill out at any second. His face feels warm, his palms sweaty.
"What?" Alec says.
"It's nothing you did. It just doesn't feel right to be together right now. We're both so busy, and I feel like we're both growing apart."
"But.... I just got you back." Alec didn't realise he was saying this until it was out there.
It seemed to have an affect on Magnus, who's eye suddenly became shiny. He swallows tightly before speaking.
"I know..." it comes out as a whisper. Magnus gets to his feet then, walking past Alec to the door.
"How many times are we gonna push each other away?" Alec asks, softly
Magnus stops walking then. But he doesn't turn, doesn't give a response. Then, he walks out of the room.
*****
Alec had let himself out of the loft. It's been two weeks since Magnus had broken up with him. He's spent the last few days crying quietly into his pillow, having no tears left now. During their time apart, Alec would jump whenever his phone went off, thinking it would be Magnus telling him he was wrong. Or maybe Magnus would come looking for him at the institute, begging for him to come back. But those things never happened.
All he can do now is think about Magnus. What might be going through his head? Is he missing Alec as much as Alec is missing him?
The breakup doesn't make sense to Alec, not that they ever do.
He's staring at the ceiling, thinking, when there's a knock on his door. He pulls himself from bed and slowly makes his way to the door.
He opens it without thinking, expecting it to be Izzy or Jace, someone needing something from him.
His heart dropped to the floor when he came face to face with a nervous looking Magnus.
"Magnus? Is everything okay?"
"Of course. I just... needed to see you."
"Oh."
They stand there for a minute, in silence. Magnus looking at the floor, Alec looking at Magnus.
"I'm sorry." Magnus whispers.
"Me too."
Magnus lifts his head then, and Alec can see the tears rolling down his face. Alec wants to pull him in, to hold him and wipe away the tears, but he can't.
"No, Alexander. I'm sorry for breaking up with you instead of telling you what I was feeling."
"What were you feeling?"
"I was feeling.... panicked."
"Why?"
Magnus takes a step closer to Alec. Almost close enough for Alec to reach out and bring their hands together. Almost.
"I felt like we were bound to repeat the mistakes we'd made. We were both so busy, and I felt like we were working counterproductive to each other. I don't know why I didn't just bring it up, but the longer I waited, the harder it was to say anything. I panicked."
Magnus looks down at the floor then.
Alec feels his heart tighten. He feels he can now touch Magnus again, so he takes him by the arm and brings him into a hug.
Holding Magnus again, everything feels okay. His heart beats right again.
"I understand, Magnus." he whispers into the side of Magnus' neck.
Magnus holds him tight. They both stay like that for a minute, before Alec pulls Magnus into his room, shutting the door behind them. They talk it out, they hold each other, and they make up. Because they'll always come back to each other.