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It wasn’t really a bad day, he tried to tell himself. It was just an off morning. He would be fine later. He always was. At least, that’s what the others thought.
Patton leaned against the counter with a sigh. It couldn’t be a bad day. He wasn’t allowed to have bad days. It was his job to cheer up the others when they were sad! How was he going to do that if he was sad himself?
So Patton took another breath and put on a smile. He would be fine! It was just an off morning! That stretched into an off lunch. And an off afternoon...
By the time the sun had gone down, Patton was exhausted by keeping up the facade all day. He smiled and laughed and joked, but none of it felt real .
Probably because none of it was real.
He sat on the couch, staring at the ground, relieved that everyone had gone to bed early. He could drop the smile.
At least, he thought so, but the creaking of the stairs had him pasting the grin right back on.
Virgil was coming down the stairs, visibly shaken. Patton softened the fake smile into something more comforting.
“Hey, sweetheart, what’s wrong?”
Virgil shrugged as he made his way to the couch, sitting down tentatively next to Patton. “Nightmare,” he muttered.
Patton couldn’t help but frown. “I’m sorry, I should’ve come to bed sooner. You don’t sleep well when I’m not there, I know.”
Virgil shook his head. “Don’t you dare blame yourself, Pat.”
Patton pasted the fake smile back on. “Well, let’s get you calmed down and back to bed, yeah? What can I do to help? We could watch a movie, or play a game, or-”
“Just-” Virgil interrupted, but cut himself off and looked away.
“No, come on, sweetheart. Tell me what you need.”
He took Virgil’s face and gently turned it back to his own.
“Just... smile? I really need to see you smile right now.”
Patton furrowed his brow, but kept the fake grin on. “Smile? I already am, silly!”
Virgil frowned and poked his cheek. “No you’re not. It’s another fake one. Your eyes aren’t lighting up right.”
Patton dropped the smile. He was exhausted. He didn’t want Virgil seeing him like this.
“Sorry.”
“Hey, no,” Virgil said, sitting up straighter. “Don’t do that. You’re allowed to have bad days, too. No one can be happy all the time.”
Patton sighed and tried to push down the tears that wanted to come up. He opened his arms, an invitation to cuddle. Virgil immediately crawled into them.
They sat there for a few minutes, holding each other, enjoying the silence of the mindscape, sharing their warmth. Eventually, Virgil pulled back a little, just enough so that he could see Patton’s face.
“Wanna watch Winnie the Pooh ?”
Patton let out a wet chuckle, the tears trying to make a return. “I would love to.”
And as Virgil crawled back into his arms after putting the DVD in, placing a gently kiss on his lips, Patton smiled.
And this time, it was real.