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“Alright girls,” Ms Leicher announced, sounding excited.
Kurt put his hand up.
“And Kurt,” she added tersely, “it’s time to put your costumes on for the dress rehearsal! I want 12 little pumpkin princesses-” She gave Kurt a pointed look, “and one prince ready to go on in fifteen minutes. When you have your tutus on, go to Janice to get your make-up, and have her check if your diadems are fastened securely. We don’t want those things flying around when you pirouette.”
This time, a little girl put her hand up.
“Yes, Rosemary?” Ms Leicher asked.
“Mommy says they are tiaras, not diadems,” the little girl chirped up, pronouncing it with two audible “h’s” in a middle school version of Queen Elisabeth; “ti-ah-rahs”.
“No, honey,” Ms Leicher replied sweetly. “These are diadems. Now go and put your costume on.” She meant to turn away when Kurt’s hand went up.
“What now, Kurt?”
“A tiara is a diadem, Ms Leicher,” he said.
His ballet teacher rolled her eyes. “I just said-”
“Yes, but…a tiara is a diadem like a sedan is a car,” Kurt countered, used to explaining things to adults in a way his dad would understand.
“A diadem is not a car!” Rosemary exclaimed with a disgusted face. “Boys are so stupid.” The other girls all tittered.
“A sedan is a car, but not all cars are sedans,” Kurt explained very slowly. “Not all diadems are tiaras, but all tiaras are-”
“We don’t have time for this, boy,” his teacher said angrily. “Go and put your costume on!”
Kurt frowned. “Fine,” he mumbled. “You’re all wearing yours wrong anyway. Now who’s stupid?”
“What was that?” Ms Leicher’s tone was bright like the colour of a stop sign.
“I said, you are wearing yours wrong. Everyone knows you’re supposed to go like this-” He held up his thumb and put it on the bridge of his nose, with his index finger down on his chin. Then he flipped his hand until his index finger rested in his hair, just over his hairline- exactly where his tiara sat. “Further back, your face looks long like a giraffe’s. Further to the front, it looks short like a monkey’s. And if you wear it on your brow like Mina, you look like a pug whose owners-”
“That’s it. I’m calling your dad.”
“But I just-!” Kurt protested. Ms Leicher shook her head.
“I will not have you insult the other girls. The girls, I mean. You are going to sit this one out and think about what I just said.”
“But I didn’t mean-” Kurt tried, tears forming in his eyes.
“One more word and I’m taking you off the pumpkin dance entirely, Kurt Hummel! Then who’s a sorry boy this Halloween Dance Recital?”
Kurt bit his lip, but said nothing. He took his plastic tiara off his head and sat down. One day, he thought. One day you’ll all dance to my tunes.