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There were a great many things that she had done in her life, and a great many things that had been done to her. Raven did not much care about fault or guilt. Laying blame around was just another tool people used to control each other. There were times when she found that tool useful but more often than not she simply had no time for it.
She had spent weeks in the company of idealistic Laura Kinney, X-23, Logan’s most notable clone. The girl was not unique, she was not even the first female clone of that infuriating man. She was the most troublesome though. Raven was sure that the things she was feeling, her doubts, grief, and guilt, could be placed firmly at the young woman’s feet. Kinney had no idea what Raven had been playing them all for, no idea why she had kept Shogun and the others around. She was a naive babe, she was as foolish and blind as the rest of them.
And yet Raven found herself with a glass bottle in one hand with no tumbler in sight. The harsh burn of whisky didn’t clear her head, and it didn’t muddle things enough to bring her peace.
“Lights.” Darkness fell and Raven finished her bottle. It would be the last for the night, even she had limits.
-------------------------------------------
Warmth. That was unexpected. Her room was not cold, but her bed had not housed this sort of warmth in a long time. It was not that she was celibate, it was that she took no lovers. Perhaps with time …
Raven opened her eyes and gazed at the face of her beloved, “Irene? How? This must be -”
“A dream, yes Raven my love.” She reached out and stroked the silky blue cheek with a straight finger. There were no knots at her joints, no sagging flesh. The flush of youth was hers again.
“A true dream?” It had never been like this, her dreams. She was clever but she was impulsive. Introspection and fantasy were realms outside herself. Was this Irene for true? Or was this a drunken fever dream? It felt real, and she wanted it to be real. “You tricked me.”
“You did not honor my wishes. And now it is coming - the collision. You cannot walk out on destiny my darling.”
“I would not - you knew there was no way I would allow my life to be so twisted, to have had all that effort benefit him . If that is what the world needs then it is better off ending.”
“You are so bitter.” Her fingers brushed through Raven’s hair as an amused smile curled her lips.
“I moved heaven and earth, wove X-23, Daken, Shogun, Deathstrike, and Creed all through each other. I captured Portal, tangled with Syphon, survived Sinister, walked into the Nexus of All Realities, everything, I did it for you my love, to bring you back. There has been such an emptiness in my breast, and you gave me -” Her annoyed tone broke as tears slid down her cheeks, “- hope.”
Irene drew her beloved into her arms and kissed her scarlet hair. After a indeterminate span of time, when she was sure Raven had let go her anger, she spoke, “You mustin’ dispare my love. There is a chance that reality will repair itself, and if it does you must be ready, you have the diaries. You have my privet notes, you have our collaborations.” She touched Raven’s breast and met her gaze, “The golden child with metal in his heart -”
“You mean -”
“I do. Dry your tears Raven. There is much that needs doing. You will not find your answers, or me, in the bottom of a bottle. Banish all doubt and weakness.”
Raven leaned in, lips parted and needy. The heat with which they were met almost made her cry again. The loneliness let up for a moment, and she felt she could breath. It would be just for tonight, but it would sustain her.
I will find a way … I will never give up.