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The screaming is getting on his nerves now, it’s been hours since the yelling has been going on and it hasn’t slowed down any. His ears hurt from the sheer amount of noise, he’s been worried he is going deaf. It feels like going through a tunnel for hours and just waiting for it to clear up.
As much as he loves singing and meeting people who adore them and love them, this is the one part of the job he hates – the screaming.
Harry is smiling wide at fans, he has always been unperturbed by the noise and madness. Louis’ not sure how he does it, how he is so unbothered by it all but it does make him wonder if Harry really was born to do this.
They’ve talked about it - numerous times over the years – what they would’ve done had they not been here now. Had they not been picked by Simon or if they had never auditioned. Louis thinks he would have tried to go to university, not sure if he would’ve made it through four years but he would’ve liked to take drama. Harry says he would’ve continued working at the bakery through school and then gone on to study Law or English or something. Louis thinks he wouldn’t have.
He has never said it out loud but he thinks Harry would’ve been famous anyway. Somehow, someway, if not Simon, he would still be doing this. Smiling at screaming fans with bright eyes and dimples.
He is looking over at Louis with curious eyes as if asking if he’s alright. He smiles back and gives him a thumbs up to assure him he’s alright. Because Harry worries. He knows Louis doesn't like being in concerts for long hours. As much as he enjoys the attention, it gets a bit much after a couple hours.
And they’ve been here for a while now, the last outdoor concert in London. After this, they get to go home and have a month to rest up. He cannot wait to get out of here so he and Harry can drive to their flat and finally breathe a sigh of relief.
He is tired of the pretending too.
Being on the road and in the public eye all day, he has to pretend. Pretend that he and Harry are just best mates when they are so much more. Pretend that Harry does not mean the world to him when he really really does. Pretend that they don’t get along anymore when they’ve never been more in love.
Tonight, he has decided, it’s going to be a quiet night. They are going to finish up here and then drive home and order pizza. Watch something on the telly while lazing around on the sofa. And then just spoon in their super comfortable bed and sleep for at least twelve hours.
In the morning though, he is going to ravish Harry.
The thought sends a chill down his spine. It’s been quite a while, he realises. They have to hide and pretend while they’re on the road and there’s only so much privacy you can get when you sleep on a bus most days.
Plus, Harry has to keep up his womanizer image so there has to be a new woman he needs to be seen with every week. That sort of cuts into their private time, seriously.
Well, just another half hour and then they will be out of here and on their way to home. Harry is still looking at him curiously.
“I’m alright, love.”
He whispers in Harry's ear as he casually walks past him and goes to stand next to Zayn across the stage. He comes over and puts his hand across Louis’ shoulder and asks him to join in. He forgets about the screaming and Zayn leads him into the bridge of the song. It’s not so bad then.
He is skipping across the stage and passes by Harry and they share a private smile – one of those that people hardly notice unless they’re looking for it. It’s been their secret for years now, assuring each other and themselves that it’s alright. While they are outside or on stage, they need it sometimes to remind themselves that it’s alright. They have each other, that it’s not a lie. It’s just something they have to hide for now but it’s true, it’s all true. He signs it sometimes, signs things like ‘Mine’ while on stage just so he remembers that even though they can’t be together in public just yet, that they are still together. That’s it’s all true, maybe behind closed doors but it is true.
As he walks past Harry, the boy gives him a shy smile and Louis has to watch his step because this is the smile that made him fall that first time. And he still falls a little bit more every time he sees it. He smiles back and keeps walking with a skip in his step.
He’s got his back to Harry as the boy is walking toward the left of the stage to stand next to Niall while Louis is walking toward Liam who's on the right.
It takes him five seconds to get there after passing Harry and in those five seconds, everything goes wrong.
He is walking with his eyes fixed on Liam who looks back at him while singing his part, then he hears a loud noise. In the midst of the screaming girls, it sounds like a bang and even though they are in a park, it echoes. Louis is still turned toward Liam and he sees his eyes flicker away from Louis’ face to look at something behind him, they widen.
Liam stops singing, the screaming stops for a second and Louis turns around on instinct. His eyes wander over to the spot where he thinks Harry should be, he doesn’t find anyone. When his eyes focus enough, Harry is falling to the ground and Louis rushes to kneel down and hold him before his back hits the floor. Everyone is quiet and then noise picks up again, his ears hurt from the shrill screams. His eyes are blurry and his hands red with Harry’s blood.
***
Louis looks so happy, even though he is bothered by the loud noises and the screaming, he is happy. Harry can tell he is, because he’s got that smile on his face - the one that makes his eyes crinkle and his nose scrunch up a bit. He catches Louis looking at him every now and then and he can tell it’s because he’s thinking about going home tonight and finally having a break.
He can’t wait either and neither can he help the small smile that plays on his own lips when Louis passes him while walking across the stage. Louis returns it with one of his own. Life is alright, he thinks.
They are singing and performing like they’d always hoped, their fans are the greatest people. They are famous, rich enough that they can buy what they want. Their families are there for them. And Harry has Louis. Life is quite alright, he thinks. It could hardly be any bette--
A sharp pain shoots through him and down his spine. Everything quiets down for a second. He doesn’t understand what’s happened till he looks down and finds his white shirt turning red around the torso. He has no control over his body as he starts to fall down. His hands have gone lax and he can only hear Louis yelling his name. He thinks he should cover his head so he doesn’t crash his skull when he lands on the floor but he can’t move his hands.
His back hits something soft as opposed to the hard concrete he was expecting. When he turns his head a little, he finds Louis cradling his head in his lap. There are tears in his eyes and Harry wants to tell him ‘I’m alright, don’t worry, Lou.’ But he doesn’t get to, because just then intrusive hands are prying Louis’ soft ones off of him, they pull Louis away from him and he is being carried and put in a bed or something. His eyes wander over to find Louis being pulled away by people as he screams and protests, the bluest eyes in the world find Harry’s and they say everything he can't, like they always do.
I am sorry.
Please be alright.
Don’t leave me.
I will find whoever did this.
I will kill them.
I love you.
Don’t go.
He wants to say it all back.
Don’t be sorry.
I’ll be alright.
I am not leaving you.
It’s not your fault.
I love you.
I will never leave you.
But he can’t. He is being taken away and he wants to stay. He wants to hold Louis and comfort him. Take him away from prying eyes and probing hands and hold him.
Louis is thrashing at the hands grabbing at him. Zayn is trying his best to hold Louis back even as he pushes him away. Liam and Niall are nowhere to be seen. Louis is looking at him pleadingly; Harry wishes he could give him what he wants.
Everything goes dark.
***
Harry’s head doesn’t feel like a reassuring weight in his lap like it usually does when they are on the sofa and Harry lies down because he wants his curls to be played with while they watch telly. It should feel like a reassuring weight but it doesn’t. His hand is twirling around a stray curl while the other one desperately rubs against his jeans to get rid of the blood. Harry’s blood.
He is looking down through blurry eyes and finds Harry looking up at him, he tries to smile at him but the fear is too much and he can’t. He wants everyone to leave them alone and go away but then he feels someone pulling him away from Harry. Something in him snaps, then.
“No! No, you can’t take him! Where are you taking him? HARRY!”
They are putting him on a stretcher and Louis wants to go with him. He wants to be near him, to hold his hand but these people won’t let him. He thrashes around trying to break away and run to Harry but they are all so powerful and he can’t get away. He feels like a fish out of water.
Zayn is now holding him from behind and saying something but Louis’ doesn’t hear anything, Harry’s staring at him and he tries harder to break away. He needs to be next to Harry, he needs to tell him he loves him and that he is sorry and that Harry better get better and come back to him. Zayn won’t let him go.
“Louis! Louis listen to me, you have to calm down, Lou. He is going to be alright, they are taking him to the hospital. Niall and Li are going with them. Come on, he is going to be fine.”
He can’t let Harry go, he has to be next to him.
“Lou, please stop it. You have to stop it, calm down. Management is not happy, don’t make a scene.”
That makes him stop struggling.
He turns around slowly to face Zayn, his arms around Louis loosen a bit. He pushes at Zayn’s chest and pulls himself free of the lad’s arms. His voice is quivering when he talks.
“You think I care what Management thinks? He is shot, he could be dying and you think I GIVE A FUCK WHAT MANAGEMENT THINKS? I DON’T! I DON’T GIVE A FUCKING FUCK WHAT ANYONE THINKS! IF ANYTHING HAPPENS TO HIM, I WILL HUNT EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOU DOWN!”
Zayn moves closer and his hands are coming close, trying to touch him and pacify him but Louis does not want to be touched right now.
“I am going to the hospital and if anyone tries to stop me, I swear to God I will stab you.”
He sees the bodyguards take a step back and nobody tries to stop him as he rushes away from the stage and toward the road. He steps in front of the first taxi he sees and the driver curses a few choice words at him but agrees to take him anyway, that’s when he realizes he doesn’t know what hospital they’ve taken Harry to. Just then, the door opens and Zayn jumps in telling the driver where to go. He looks at Louis and nods once before looking away.
Louis knows he didn’t mean what he said, he knows that someone forced him to say it. And he must also be worried about Harry, his mate has gotten hurt too.
And just the thought of Harry hurt breaks something in him. A choked sob escapes his mouth before he muffles it with his hand. Zayn looks over sharply and his eyes soften when they meet Louis’.
He throws himself over Zayn, tears running down his cheeks and once in a while he will tremble a little but Zayn’s hands tighten around him and he allows Louis to silently sob till they finally get to the hospital. He rushes out of the taxi even before it has stopped completely and runs in through the emergency doors toward the reception.
“Harry Styles?”
He barks at the woman behind the desk and she looks up surprised before recognition flashes on her face. Louis knows she knows who he is, this should help, he thinks.
“I’m sorry, sir. Only family can—“
“Don’t you fucking dare do that right now, he was shot and I need to see him. Tell me where he—“
“Sir, I am afraid I cannot give out information about patients'—“
“You listen to me, that boy is my life and you better fucking tell me where he is right now or I will sue this—“
“I can’t tell you unless—“
“HE IS MY HUSBAND, IS THAT ENOUGH? NOW TELL ME WHERE THE FUCK HE IS!”
He can tell everybody around them has stopped to witness their argument and he can almost picture Paul lecturing him over this but he couldn’t care less about anything right now, he just needs to see Harry and know that he is alright. Everything else can fucking wait.
“That’s not-“
He is about to climb over the desk and do something he will regret later when he hears Zayn cut in.
“Listen ma’m, I think there’s been a mistake. We were told to go straight up to the Operation Theatre, thanks for your help.”
He is a bit lost but Zayn pulls him away and points toward the elevators. He follows blindly and runs toward the sign saying OT just as they exit the lift. Zayn is running behind him as they follow the signs and finally come to a stop when they see Naill and Liam and a dozen other people waiting in a corridor. Niall spots them first and he rushes over. Liam notices then and his face contorts into one of even more worry.
“Lou! Are you alright? You don’t look so—“
“I’m fine, Niall. How is he? Any word on him? Are they performing surgery? What’d they say—“
“They are performing a minor surgery, the bullet made a clean break, it was just a graze. He is going to be alright.”
“Why was there so much blood? There was so much blood, there was--it was all over the floor. And he was in so much pain, are they sure about—“
“Yes, Louis. He is not in any danger, the doctor talked to us before they rushed him in. It’s all just a minor surgery and some stitches. He is going to be alright.”
Liam is looking at him with concern on his face but there’s also hope. Louis knows if he can trust anyone to tell him the truth, it’s Liam. And the hope on his face makes him feel a little lighter.
“Okay. Okay, alright. Good.”
“He is going to be okay, Lou. You need to calm down.”
“I am calmed down. I'm fine. He is going to be okay, I am calm.”
He feels a hand on his shoulder and turns around to find Anne, she looks down at him with wet eyes and he clutches her with everything he's got. They stay like that for a moment, both of them consoling and reassuring each other. She then hugs Niall and the others one by one before finding a seat. Louis just needs to see Harry.
“We need to keep this tight. Louis, I know you are worried but we need to know if you’ve said anything to anyone, anything about you and Harry. We need to sort this out, Harry is going to be alright but we need to know—“
“Are you fucking kidding me? Are you for real? I almost lost him tonight, he could’ve seriously gotten hurt, he could’ve died and you’re asking me if I’ve said anything about us. Are you shitting me right now?”
“Look, I know that it was an unfortunate accident—“
“Oh, it was no accident. Someone shot him, that’s not an accident. That’s an attack, which we pay you to take care of. THIS IS YOUR FUCKING FAULT SO DON’T YOU DARE TELL ME IT WAS AN UNFORTUNATE ACCIDENT. THIS IS ON YOU!”
“We will get this sorted, I promise. We are right now taking care of it, the police have detained someone. He’s some guy who dated that college girl that Harry went out with last week. That’s being taken care of, but we also need to take care of the media report of this and what you did—“
“WHAT I DID WAS REACT LIKE A HUMAN BEING WHEN MY FUCKING HUSBAND WAS SHOT, THAT’S WHAT I DID. YOU WANT TO TELL ME I HAVE TO DENY IT, FUCK YOU! I AM DONE, I AM DONE PLAYING YOUR STUPID GAMES AND I AM DONE LYING AND PRETENDING. FUCK THE CONTRACT AND FUCK YOU!”
His throat hurts when he is finished yelling, it feels like he has just swallowed sandpaper. His eyes are leaking once again and he is panting from the effort of breathing after all that screaming. Everybody else is silently looking at him as his chest heaves violently and he stares down Ronald Green, their PR Manager.
A couple of doctors and nurses have come running out to see what the commotion is about, he is right now being told to keep it down or he will be asked to leave. The doctor looks like he understands why Louis is shouting but he can’t help but do his duty.
“It’s disturbing the other patients plus the OT is right there, so please keep it down. There is a cafeteria two floors down, you can go there if you need to talk.”
“I’m sorry about the noise, Doctor. We'll keep it down. Thanks.”
Anne politely answers the doctor with a trembling voice. Louis feels her hand on his back as she pats reassuringly and smiles at him. He tells himself to calm down.
“I think we should go down to the cafeteria. Niall, you come with me and Liam, can you call the lawyer and get him to come over? Lou, you and Anne should stay here. Wait for any news and call us if you hear anything. We’ll be downstairs taking care of everything else.”
Zayn is talking really fast and everyone seems to be listening to him as Louis looks on dumbfounded. They all make their way to the lift and disappear soon enough, leaving him alone with Anne.
“He is going to be alright, Louis.”
“I know, I just—I should’ve been--I should’ve seen it, I should’ve stopped it.”
“Stop it. Stop blaming yourself, you can’t possibly have done anything. He is not hurt that—“
“But what if he was? What if he…”
“He is not going to. He’ll be fine. You need to stop thinking like that, Lou.”
“I can’t lose him, Anne. I can’t.”
“You won’t, love. He’s going to be alright.”
“I can’t lose him.”
He feels Anne’s arms around him and he lets go. Finally allowing himself to break down. Say everything he has been repeating in his head over and over. Sob violently and cough and tremble and just break down.
“I am so sorry, Anne.”
“No, love, it’s not your fault. I don’t blame you, he doesn’t blame you either.”
“He should.”
“He’d take that bullet again before hearing you say that.”
“I am so so sorry.”
“Me too, love. Me too.”
“I love him so much.”
“Me too, darling.”
***
He doesn’t feels so good, his back is hurting all over and there are loud noises. He tries to remember where he is and just as the memory of the concert comes back, he snaps his eyes open and sits up abruptly to find his mother looking at him with surprise. He had been asleep on the hospital floor with his head cradled in his mother’s lap.
She looks worried as she sees him sit up, the last thing he remembers is Anne holding him. He must’ve fallen asleep while talking to her. Wait, wasn’t the surgery supposed to be over soon—
“He is fine. The surgery was over half an hour ago and he is doing just fine. Anne and the others went to see him, we didn’t want to wake you up. He is not awake yet, but he’s doing great. They shifted him to a room downstairs. Are you alright, darling?”
He can’t stop from launching himself at her and once again the tears come before he even realizes.
“I was so scared, Mum. I was so scared, I thought I was going to lose him. I can’t lose him, Mum. I can’t lose him. I was so scared.”
“I know, love. I know. But it’s okay, he’s okay.”
“I saw him falling down and his blood was on my hands. He was looking at me when they took him away and I thought I’d die if I never saw him again. I couldn’t live without him, mum, I just couldn’t.”
“I know, Lou. But he’s alright. You can go see him if you want.”
“I can?”
“Yeah.”
“In a bit.”
“Alright.”
He just stays there holding on to his mum as she lets him cry.
“I can’t do this anymore, mum. I can’t lie anymore.”
“Are you sure you’re ready, Lou?”
“Yes, I'm ready. I need everyone to know, I can’t hide anymore. It’s like we never existed, all the things we’ve done, like they never existed and I can’t live like that anymore.”
“Alright then, we’ll tell them. Do you want to go see him now?”
“Yes.”
“I’ll go check on the other boys, they are down in the cafeteria with Anne, getting some food. Come down when you’re ready.”
She hugs him once again before walking to the elevators, he stands outside the room and takes a deep breath before going in.
Harry is lying unconscious on the bed and even the giant that he is, he looks frail and small in the hospital gown as he lies there motionless. Louis wipes away at his cheek as he makes his way to the chair by the bed and sits down. He doesn’t know how long he sits there before he takes Harry’s hand.
He squeezes it to reassure himself that yes, Harry is here and he is okay.
“You scared me. So much. I thought I’d lost you. Oh god, I thought I’d lost you. Don’t you dare do that again!”
He feels Harry squeeze his hand back, he looks up shocked and finds Harry looking back at him.
“I’m sorry, Lou.”
His voice is a little rough from disuse but his eyes say everything he can't.
“Hazza! Oh god, thank god you’re alright. You fucking idiot, you scared me so much.”
“I’m sorr—“
“No, I am sorry. I should’ve stopped it, somehow. I just, I can’t lie about us anymore, Haz.”
Harry just looks at him with wide eyes but doesn’t say anything.
“I want to make it public, about us. I want them to know we’re married.”
Still nothing. He’s just looking silently at Louis.
“I don’t care what people say, I don’t care if we lose sales or whatever. I can’t lose you, we’ll leave the band. We’ll retire, I can go work again. Whatever we have to do. I am done lying, Harry.”
“If I knew it’d only take me getting shot at, I’d have done it way sooner.”
The words hit him a moment too late and when they do, he stands up abruptly and is about to hit Harry when he realizes he’s still hurt.
“You bastard, if you weren’t hurt already, I’d hit you so hard.”
“There’s the man I married!”
He can’t do anything but smile back when Harry is blinding him with his dimples. Of all the people in the world, this is the idiot he had to fall for.
***
The response is not bad actually.
As the story breaks on the news for the first time, they are all glued to the TV in Harry’s room.
“In a shocking attack on pop sensation Harry Styles yesterday during an outdoor concert, the singer was shot by a disgruntled boyfriend of one of the women rumoured to be Styles’ short-time fling. Henrietta Fieff, a 23-year old student at UCL was rumoured to be dating Harry Styles when the two were spotted having dinner last week. Styles and Fieff had both refused to comment when asked about the rumours.
It was dismissed as being a false rumour, and Fieff being one in a long-line of alleged girlfriends – given Styles and his womanizer ways. But it seems that Fieff’s boyfriend, 27-year old student Andrew Jenkins just couldn’t let it go.
Jenkins was jealous of Harry taking his girlfriend out for a fancy dinner. He bought tickets for One Direction’s last concert in their tour which was supposed to close last night. Jenkins somehow managed to slip in a gun past security and he waited until the last song to fire the weapon. He got Styles a few inches beneath his ribs, we have been told that there was no major damage and that Britain’s favourite curly-haired lad is well and recovering.
In an interesting turn of events following this attack yesterday, band mate Louis Tomlinson made some startling revelations. Although, we don’t think he necessarily meant to. Right after Styles was shot, Tomlinson rushed over to hold him before he hit the ground and the interaction between the two after that - which has been recorded on some fans’ cameras and is floating about the internet right now- can hardly be described as platonic.
Or ‘mortal enemies’ as the band’s management has allegedly been trying to prove, “Modest is just trying to play it off like Louis and Harry don’t get along anymore, like they are not friends anymore. Mortal enemies or something, or like dude bropals. When it’s always been clear how much they love each other, I mean you just have to look at them looking at each other. Ever since X-factor, I mean they even got so many matching tattoos. But Modest just keeps trying to prove that the shippers have broken their friendship. Well, I am a shipper and I ship bulls**t. And I really really hope Harry is okay.” That was one of the many girls who spent the whole night at the concert site to show support for Styles.
Their perseverance in ‘shipping bulls**t’ got rewarded when Tomlinson came out of the hospital this morning and released the following statement,
“I can make a short statement about what happened yesterday. First, Harry is alright. He is recovering now, no permanent damage, he is resting right now. Second, I have an important announcement. Harry and I are together. Just please, let me finish. I want to thank all the fans for their support through this difficult time. We could not have gotten through this without your support. And I’d like to make a request, during this hard time I am asking you all to cooperate and please give us privacy till we can go home. I promise, we will issue an official statement when Harry has fully recovered and we will do interviews but for now, I would really really request you to please respect our privacy. Thank you.”
He was quick to go back into the hospital and did not come out again. In an excellent display of affection, the fans did indeed clear out and leave the park and the hospital. Reporters were asked to leave as well. Later on, a statement was made thanking everyone for their cooperation. So yes, everyone’s favorite boybander is alright and millions of fangirls are screaming all over the world right now along the lines of ‘Told you so. They are together.’
And we are happy for Harry and Louis both. And thank god he is alright, or else Louis would’ve definitely hurt someone. According to a source, when Tomlinson was refused access to his ‘dude-bropal’s’ room he was quite angry at the nurse. He allegedly yelled at the poor woman and screamed that ‘Harry is my husband, let me in.’
This rumour has gained more credibility among fans after Tomlinson came out this morning to announce that he and band mate Harry Styles are together. Needless to say, this has garnered quite a response among fans. Most people seem to be highly supportive of the pair but some have abandoned ship after accusing the members of lying and deceiving them. It will be quite interesting to see how the aftermath of this plays out.
Meanwhile, Andrew Jenkins has been charged with five counts including assault, possession of a weapon, endangering safety of minors and others. He will be presented in Court on Monday. More on this story as it unfolds.”
Niall switches off the TV as everyone collectively sighs. It’s not that bad.
After everyone hugging everyone and lots of smiles going around, they leave the room. Louis smiles at Harry who is grinning back at him. It’s not so bad at all.
“I can’t wait to go on tumblr, it must be on fire.”
Louis laughs at that, of course Harry would joke about it. But he nods his head and joins in, he knows they will be talking about the serious things when they get home. Lying in bed and talking about how scared Louis was. But for now, he keeps it light.
“I am going to be really offended if tumblr didn’t crash even once.”
“I bet it did. I bet they all went crazy with thousands of versions of what happened.”
He looks down at Harry and his manic grin is replaced by a smaller, softer smile.
“Don’t ever do that again. Please.”
“Promise.”
Harry smiles against his lips when he leans down to kiss him, his hand comes up to rest on Louis’ neck and he makes a choked off sound in his throat.
“You better recover soon, we have a whole month to ourselves and I want to make up for the past three years of blue balls that Management gave me.”
“Heeeey.”
“What? I’m gonna need you to be able to hold me up for extended periods of time. Otherwise you’re useless to me, Styles.”
“That’s Styles-Tomlinson to you.”
“Out of all the idiots in the world.”
“What?”
“Nothing, darling. Love you.”
***