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my b's

Summary:

seungkwan only needed some advice for his boy problems, but he gets a chaotic shitfest of a groupchat with twelve other guys instead

or: seungkwan's the one who started it, but everyone keeps it going

(discontinued probably forever)

Notes:

uhhh lmao so i only started this bc i can't seem to write and finish anything else :)) hopefully this isn't a total disappointment tho whoops

vernon: smokyboi / vapekid
seungkwan: mcboo
minghao: haoudoin
mingyu: theweathersgreat
seokmin: sunchild
wonwoo: wowwoo
soonyoung: foreveryoung
junhui: junebug
jeonghan: hen

the rest will show up in the next one/two chapters, i promise!!

Chapter 1: alright bitches, i need help

Summary:

haoudoin: hey jun
haoudoin: my boy seungkwan has some boy issues

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

mcboo has created a groupchat

mcboo named the chat “my b’s”

mcboo has added theweathersgreat, smokyboi, haoudoin, and sunchild to the chat

 

Tues, Jan 23, 2:02 PM

 

mcboo: alright bitches

mcboo: I need help

 

haoudoin: o yes suddenly i have such a strong urge to help u

 

sunchild: omg hi guys! it’s about time we made a groupchat with the five of us :)

 

theweathersgreat: what’s up seungkwan

 

smokyboi: ur mom

 

theweathersgreat: 

theweathersgreat: go away

 

mcboo: okay okay let’s focus here

mcboo: I have a problem

 

haoudoin: wats new

 

smokyboi: how can we help kwannie

 

haoudoin: kwannie

haoudoin: gross

 

sunchild: idk i think it’s cute

 

mcboo: okay so here’s the deal. I like this guy but idk how to tell him? like, I kinda wanna suck his dick but idk how to like casually bring that up

 

sunchild: oh I see

 

theweathersgreat: oh my

theweathersgreat: that does sound like quite the predicament

 

mcboo: yeah I actually don’t know why I included you in this chat because you can’t even tell Wonwoo you like him. or, like, wanna suck his dick even tho it’s painfully obvious

 

theweathersgreat: uhhhh I thought we were talkin about you here

 

mcboo: mmhmm you thought

 

haoudoin: seungkwan

haoudoin: my youngling

haoudoin: u just gotta tell him

 

mcboo: um lmao what

 

haoudoin: that’s what i did w jun

 

mcboo: who??

 

sunchild: ooh who’s Jun?

 

haoudoin: oh, he’s a senior. hold on i’ll add him, he’s probably got some good advice for u too

 

mcboo: no wait hold on I don’t think that’s necessary

 

haoudoin has added junebug to the chat

 

haoudoin: hey jun

haoudoin: my boy seungkwan has some boy issues

 

junebug: ahh, I see. how can I help?

 

theweathersgreat: he wants to suck this dude’s dick but doesn’t know how to tell him

 

junebug: oh, I got you. just do it. be like “hey man, I wanna suck ur dick”

 

haoudoin: that’s exactly what i told him

 

junebug: yeah good advice b

 

haoudoin: :)

 

theweathersgreat: so… since when have you two been a thing?

 

junebug: since like two weeks ago

 

haoudoin: i didn’t want to tell anyone until it was more… official, ig

 

theweathersgreat: so, you two are official?

 

junebug: yeah he’s my boyfriend

junebug: uh minghao only if you want to be

junebug: wow this is weird that we’re having this conversation over text. I was planning on, like, asking you in person and stuff

 

haoudoin: um yeah, i’d really like to be your boyfriend

 

junebug: oh thnk god

 

smokyboi: OMG JUN

 

junebug: uhhh

 

smokyboi: it’s me,, vernon!

 

junebug: omg vernon! dude! how are you doing? we haven’t talked in forever!

 

smokyboi: dude too true, we should hang out soon

 

mcboo: how do you two know each other?

 

junebug: we used to hang out n vape behind the school

 

theweathersgreat has changed smokyboi’s name to vapekid

 

mcboo: omg Vernonie you vape??

 

vapekid: nah not anymore, that shit fucked with my lungs

vapekid: I only did it in freshman year

vapekid: but I miss ya jun :(

 

junebug: I miss you too (╥_╥)

 

haoudoin: yuck,, back off my guy @ vape kid

 

junebug: don’t worry baby I’m all yours (◕‿◕✿)

 

mcboo: this is cute and all, I really do mean that, but I don’t think I can just tell this guy something like that so… straightforwardly

 

junebug: well then hun he ain’t worth it

 

mcboo: but I really like him :((

 

junebug: well, I can always pull in a second opinion

junebug: or third, I guess

 

junebug has added foreveryoung to the chat

 

foreveryoung: what am I doing here???

foreveryoung: who are you people???

 

mcboo: who are /you/???

 

foreveryoung: I’m Soonyoung

 

theweathersgreat: omg soonyoung!!

 

foreveryoung: Mingyu??

 

theweathersgreat: hey!!

 

foreveryoung: hi!!

 

junebug: okay so this is kwon soonyoung, obviously. a fellow senior and close confidante

junebug: and all of you are juniors…?

 

sunchild: yes :)

 

haoudoin: unfortunately

 

theweathersgreat: omg same we’re not even seniors yet and I’m already suffering from senioritis

 

vapekid: relatable content

 

foreveryoung: ah, cool cool. nice to meet you all! why am I here though exactly?

 

junebug: seungkwan has a problem

 

foreveryoung: who is Seungkwan?

 

mcboo: me

 

foreveryoung: how can I help you my son

 

mcboo: well, uh, i kinda like this guy but i don’t know how to tell him

 

foreveryoung: do you wanna suck his dick?

 

mcboo: uh, yeah

 

foreveryoung: then you just have to tell him

 

junebug: that’s what I said!

 

haoudoin: and me too! face it, seungkwan, it’s science

 

mcboo: idk…

 

foreveryoung: here tho, ik a guy who can help

 

foreveryoung has added wowwoo to the chat

 

foreveryoung: wait, wrong person

 

wowwoo: why do you have to hurt me like this?

 

foreveryoung has added hen to the chat

 

foreveryoung: jeonghan, we need you

 

hen: 

hen: ask and you shall receive

hen: I am here

 

foreveryoung: Seungkwan, tell him your problem

 

mcboo: you know, I don’t think I like him anymore

 

wowwoo: what’s the issue?

 

vapekid: nothing, seungkwan’s just working some things out

 

hen: do you like a guy?

 

mcboo: ...yes

 

hen: you wanna suck his dick?

 

mcboo: sigh

 

hen: if you do, you should just tell him. ik it’ll be hard, but if you wanna suck his dick then it’s best to just tell him upfront

 

haoudoin: seungkwan this is the way of the land

 

junebug: omg jeonghan ily

 

hen: lol who r u

 

foreveryoung: thanks for your help, jeonghan :)

 

theweathersgreat: wait idk a jeonghan

theweathersgreat: hold on

theweathersgreat: will everyone introduce themselves? I’m kim mingyu, 16, junior

 

mcboo: uh I’m Boo Seungkwan, also a junior

 

vapekid: choi vernon, junior

 

foreveryoung: you all already know me!!

 

junebug: wen junhui, senior ٩(●ᴗ●)۶

 

wowwoo: I’m Jeon Wonwoo, senior as well

 

mcboo: 

mcboo: omfg

 

theweathersgreat: I’m gonna stop you right there seungkwan

 

haoudoin: xu minghao, or like myungho or some shit, idfk, imma junior

 

hen: okay cool cool I’m yoon jeonghan, you all go to seoul high? I just graduated from there last year. seungkwan I think you and I actually shared a cosmetics elective first semester last year

 

mcboo: omg! I think we did too. you had the long hair, right? it’s a good look

 

hen: yeah that’s me! thanks man

 

theweathersgreat: okay so uhh I know soonyoung from foods and soonyoung knows wonwoo and minghao you’re dating jun and jun and vernon used to vape together and jeonghan and seungkwan had a class together and hao, seungkwan, seokmin, vernon, n i are all friends so. okay. I think I got this figured out

 

mcboo: and you know wonwoo too

mcboo: wait jun I need one of those lil face things

 

junebug: ( ͡~ ͜ʖ ͡° )

 

mcboo: yes perfect

 

junebug: I gotchu

 

wowwoo: it’s nice to meet most of you guys

 

foreveryoung: WAIT

foreveryoung: DID I SEE SEOKMIN’S NAME

 

theweathersgreat: oh yeah he’s here, lee seokmin, a junior too. idk where he went though, he was here earlier

 

foreveryoung: OMG I LOVE SEOKMIN WE HAD A CHILDCARE CLASS TOGETHER LAST SEMESTER AND BECAME BEST FRIENDS

foreveryoung: SEOKMINNIEEEEEEEEE

 

sunchild: I saw my name?

sunchild: oh my gosh Soonyoung!!!!!!!!!!

sunchild: sorry I just disappeared, the teacher started making rounds :)) n she takes every phone she sees

 

hen: wow high school feels like so long ago,, my professors don’t even care that I have my phone out rn

 

mcboo: omg you’re texting in class??

 

hen: aren’t you??

 

mcboo: ...u got me there

 

foreveryoung: SEOKMIN I LOVE YOU

 

sunchild: I LOVE YOU TOO SOONYOUNG

 

haoudoin: gross. im just tryna pay attention in calculus rn

 

junebug: ew calculus don’t worry bb I’m coming to save you ᕕ(╯°□°)ᕗ

 

haoudoin: its k i don’t mind calc

 

junebug: oh okay then (ಥ﹏ಥ)

 

hen: I should probably go though, I do need to take notes. have fun in your classes :) and I hope you work out your boy problems seungkwan!

 

mcboo: thanks. talk to you guys later!

 

theweathersgreat: yeah, bye

 

wowwoo: ( ・_・)ノ

 

junebug: stop wonwoo that’s my thing

 

wowwoo: ●︿●

Notes:

hjdkkddk this is such a mess but i got the first several chapters already written so hopefully there will be regular updates :))