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“You’re sure about this?” Minghao asks softly, a gentle smile on his face. He won’t be angry if Junhui backs out, it’s only understandable. Junhui nods once, his tongue flicking out to moisten his lips out of nervous habit.
Junhui’s heart stops for an infinitesimal moment when Minghao leans close, so close — too close — that Junhui can distinguish the different hues of burnished brown contained in Minghao’s eyes.
”Uh,” Junhui can’t really focus on anything but the taller man above him. Minghao and his long eyelashes that fan over his cheeks ever so delicately. Minghao and his soft, rosy lips. Right now, inside the walls of the brunette’s room, the world has been reduced to just he and the boy he has fallen in love with. “Just do it already, please.”
Unaware of Junhui’s inner turmoil, Minghao continues to hover over him for another moment before he opens his mouth and commands quietly, “Breathe.”
Junhui realizes that he has been holding his breath for the last couple of seconds. But unlike what Minghao might think, the reason lies in their closeness rather than the pain that is about to follow.
Junhui gulps loudly as Minghao leans in. Minghao’s hand is steady and fearless when he pierces Junhui’s earlobe with the needle. The sensation is an awkward sting that is more annoying than painful and Junhui lets out a soft whimper.
"You okay?" Minghao asks. Junhui would look him in the eye, but decides against it. He knows the concern swimming in Minghao’s expression would send his heart into a frenzy.
"Yes," Junhui answers, feeling the brunette’s warm, calloused digits rubbing his earlobe, trying to appease his pain. He appreciates it, even if the touch sends a small full-body shiver throughout him.
“Hurts?”
“Just a bit,” Junhui replies. Minghao smiles and rubs his earlobe one last time before he steps back, rocking back on his heels a bit.
"We have to keep the needle there for at least fifteen minutes."
Junhui nods. Inwardly though, he’s freaking out. Fifteen minutes is not long, and the sensation in his earlobe, while uncomfortable, is tolerable. But the main source of his internal turmoil stems from being alone with Minghao in the privacy of the brunette’s room.
It’s impossible to dismiss the sudden weight of self-consciousness that falls over him.
“Sit,” Minghao offers as he plops down on the edge of his bed. Junhui feels too awkward to do so, but the brunette’s patient smile followed by two soft pats on the bed, right next to him, prod him to move.
“Excuse me,” Junhui excuses himself stiffly before sitting next to Minghao, his fingers tapping a nervous rythym onto the fabric of his jeans. He looks around to keep himself occupied.
“Is it uncomfortable?” Minghao asks, concerned, and Junhui is already opening his mouth to deny that he isn’t but the brunette adds, “Maybe I should have iced your earlobe a bit more.”
Junhui relaxes a bit, apparently having misinterpreted the younger’s question.
“No, I’m good! I can barely feel it! Really— I’m fine. I’m used to the pain. This is nothing,” he rambles on, trying to appease Minghao’s worried grimace but his words seem to have the opposite effect.
Minghao does the thing with his mouth where he tilts his upper lip ever so slightly, giving Junhui a peek of his white canines. "Yeah, well..." Minghao starts, and then he rubs the back of his neck. "That shouldn’t be something to be proud of."
Junhui hums quietly and says slowly, “It's not that I'm proud of it.”
He really isn’t. It’s just that pain has become a constant in his life, one he holds with little regard but one that, apparently, is a big deal for Minghao.
“But don't worry— I don’t get hurt that much anymore. I'm more careful now," Junhui says, trying to ease Minghao’s concern.
Minghao stares at him for a moment before he sighs. He draws a worried smile on his lips as he pinches Junhui’s cheek softly. "Yeah, but I still worry, y’know?"
The touch is light and teasing and Junhui’s eyes flutter close, reveling in the gesture his traitorous brain translates as a caress.
“I know,” Junhui says quietly as Minghao moves his thumb over the expanse of his cheek, and as if he’s suddenly aware of what he’s doing, Minghao takes back his hand hastily.
“I-I gotta say that I’m surprised…” Minghao continues with an unsteady voice, dismissing what had just happened. “I never thought you’d be the type to like this kind of stuff.”
Junhui freezes. It’s not that he likes this stuff—shit, he’d been freaking out ever since he’d asked Minghao to do his first piercing for him. Junhui hated needles, he admitted he did this just to find some new ground between himself and Minghao.
Junhui purses his lips and scratches his cheek. “Is it… weird?” he asks, embarrassed.
“Not weird.” The brunette shakes his head. “Have you seen me? A metal detector would hunt me down, Junhui.” Minghao chuckles, and Junhui’s chest clenches.
“I’m just curious why you wanted a piercing all of a sudden.”
Junhui avoids Minghao’s eyes, not knowing how to reply to that.
One month ago, Minghao came into the dormrooms with big grin on his face and a piercing in his right ear. The emerald dot in his earlobe was subtle enough to miss at first glance, but Junhui… oh, Junhui couldn’t miss it.
How could he? It’s been months since he’s followed Minghao’s every move, drinking every word that fell from his mouth. It’s been months since he got used to the notion that he’s in love with Xu Minghao, and the surprising part of that wasn’t the realization itself, but how fast Junhui came to terms with it. It wasn’t hard. Falling in love with Minghao was one of the easiest, yet most confusing things that has happened in his life.
He is irremediably in love with Minghao, so of course he can’t offer an honest explanation behind his sudden interest in piercings. He can’t say that he wanted one because Minghao made it seem cool and also because Junhui has a silly, almost childish desire to match with him. Instead he opens his mouth and says, “Because it’s manly.”
Expectedly, that answer pleases Minghao. He grins, bright as the sun and in that dangerous way that has Junhui’s heart clogging his throat.
“You’re already manly, Junhui! But I gotta say, a piercing will make you look even cooler!” he exclaims, pulling Junhui into a one-armed hug.
“You think so?” Junhui asks, trying to quell the thunderous noise inside his ribcage, pleading to every deity that Minghao can’t hear it.
“Yeah! I also like the color you chose.” At that, Minghao releases him and takes the earring placed on top of a clean tissue on the drawer. “Red will really suit you,” he says.
The earring Junhui chose is a dark hue of red and coincidentally, it’s also the same style Minghao wears. The implication is right there, in plain sight. It’s so obvious that Junhui can’t help but feel embarrassed by how evident his feelings are. Part of him hopes for Minghao to say something about it, but the more rational, coward part of him pleads that Minghao doesn’t suspect the reason behind his choices.
The unsteady tethering between wanting to be found out and wanting to keep this secret is driving him crazy.
As Minghao keeps inspecting the earring, Junhui steals glances at him. The brunette has a soft smile on his lips, and while the sight is something that Junhui treasures, he doesn’t know how to interpret it. Is Minghao just admiring the earring? Is he wondering why Junhui picked the same style as his? Is he getting suspicious?
Junhui clears his throat loudly, and then stutters when the weight of his thoughts is too heavy to bear, “H-how long has it been? Shouldn’t we put the earring in?”
Minghao’s reverie is broken with a blink. He checks his phone and nods. “Yeah, I think it’s been long enough.”
Junhui sighs loudly, but his relief gets misinterpreted by Minghao, who says, “It’s cool Jun’, we’re almost done.”
Minghao closes in, and Junhui wills himself to not flinch when the brunette touches his earlobe. Junhui closes his eyes because that’s the easiest way to avoid looking at Minghao. He would rather drink in the sight of the younger, but he’s scared of staring too much, of displaying his love too easily.
“Move your head a little,” Minghao commands, his voice dropping to a whisper as Junhui offers his left ear. Minghao’s breath falls on his neck, making his skin break into goosebumps. The position is too intimate, and his self-awareness skyrockets. Is he breathing too fast? Too hard? Is Minghao noticing everything?
Luckily for him, the brunette is more focused on his task. Minghao grasps his earlobe and whispers, “I’m taking it out now.”
Junhui nods and Minghao extracts the needle carefully.
“Hold still, I gotta clean your earlobe,” Minghao instructs. Junhui nods again, stiffening his shoulders and gulping loudly when the thick scent of the alcohol reaches his nose. He offers no resistance when Minghao tilts his head gently. It’s followed by a sting on his ear that makes him furrow his brows.
“We’re almost done,” Minghao says, cleaning his earlobe gently with the cotton. “Hang on just a bit more.”
“Okay.”
This pain is laughable in comparison to the ones he has been inflicted with over the years, but Minghao’s concern and his attempts to make it bearable for him is a thoughtful gesture Junhui thrives on.
Inadvertently, a soft smile is drawn on his lips. If it’s for Minghao, Junhui would put up with any kind of pain if it meant being this close to him. He wonders what kind of expression Minghao would make if he found out about Junhui’s masochistic thoughts.
“I’m putting the earring in now,” Minghao warns. Again, Junhui nods. Minghao’s digits are warm against his skin. They’re gentle yet firm when Minghao’s pushes the earring into the hole. He can feel the pin going through his earlobe. It doesn’t hurt, but the soreness around the tender flesh is uncomfortable.
He can feel Minghao securing the earring, and that’s it… It’s done, the earring is in place but Minghao doesn’t back away, nor does he move and Junhui is too nervous to open his eyes and find Minghao too close to his face.
There is a pause, long and stagnant.
“So… how does it look?” Junhui asks, still with his eyes closed.
“You look— it looks… good,” Minghao says, clearing his throat.
Junhui purses his lips, his heart doing a somersault. Minghao said ‘You’, and perhaps Junhui is reading too much into it, but he can’t stop the sudden rush of warmth from flooding his entire being.
“Thanks,” he says, about to open his eyes, but the moment he does darkness engulfs him once again. Junhui stills, his vision blocked by Minghao’s hand covering his eyes. “Hao..?”
“Sorry,” Minghao sounds unsure, his voice wobbling. Junhui can see a bit of his expression between the gaps of his fingers. His mouth is set into a firm, stern line, and his face is red, almost the same tone of his hair last summer. “I just—I need a moment.”
A moment? What does that mean? A moment for what? A moment from what?
Junhui holds his breath and waits, and waits, and waits. Until the silence is too uncomfortable that he needs to say something to break it.
“Seungcheol is going to scold me when he sees me with the piercing,” Junhui says and laughs awkwardly, trying to fill the void.
Minghao laughs too, breathy and shakily, unusually stiff that has Junhui wondering what is happening. “I know, but I think you’ll be luckier and not get the same hour-long scolding that I got.”
Another pause follows. It’s awkward and Junhui bites his lower lip, prey of nervousness.
“Um, hey,” Minghao starts. “Did you know I have another piercing?”
“What? Really?”
Minghao hums affirmatively. “I got one on my tongue.”
Junhui’s brain short-circuits. On his tongue? Minghao has a piercing on his tongue? It shouldn’t be that alarming, but Junhui has heard things — myths perhaps — and right at that moment, with his crush’s palm veiling his eyes as they’re alone in Minghao’s room, Junhui can’t help but wonder after that revelation.
Is it true that kissing someone with a tongue ring feels...not the worst?
Junhui whimpers, just imagining Minghao’s lips falling on his, touching them softly. Warm and inviting, opening and letting his tongue invade his mouth and—
“God —I mean good! Cool! Sounds awesome! And..fuckin’ manly!”
Junhui interrupts the path of his own thoughts. He’s already flustered and self-conscious enough as it is to deepen his struggles with unlikely scenarios.
“I know, right?”
“Did it hurt?” Junhui asks.
“Not that much,” Minghao says.
“Doesn’t it bother you?”
“Not really.”
“Oh… what does it feel like?”
At that question, Minghao stills. Junhui can feel his hand tensing and the sound of his breathing picking up.
“Do you really want to know?”
There’s an edge in his words, one that Junhui doesn’t know how to interpret. Regardless, he nods softly.
Junhui can barely see between the gaps of Minghao’s fingers, but he doesn’t need to do so to know that Minghao is leaning in. The bed dips slightly, and then he can feel Minghao hovering over his face. His warm breath falls from his lips, making them tingle and sending a shudder down his spine.
The expectancy of the moment dies when Junhui yields under the pressure of his nervousness and lets his mouth run wild. “People say, um, that if the barbell is too big it feels a bit awkward—and I read once that you have to be mindful of what you eat. If it’s too recent and—oh, that’s right! Sometimes the tongue swells a bit so using a—”
“Junhui…” Minghao calls, patiently and with a tone of fond exasperation. Junhui can hear his smile in his voice.
“Yes…?”
“You talk too much,” Minghao says and then leans in.
Junhui can't tell if his heartbeat has stopped altogether or if it hits the speed of light. He’s too focused on the lips falling on top of his. They’re not soft as Junhui thought they were. They’re a bit chapped and rough, but they’re warm and welcoming, and Junhui opens his mouth, the slight gap making it easier to lock their lips together.
Minghao finally removes his hand from his eyes but Junhui’s eyes are closed, too lost in the moment to even think about opening them. He tilts his head slightly when Minghao cups his jaw, soft and loving. Then the brunette’s tongue touches his lips and Junhui’s lets it pass through them into his mouth.
Junhui clutches the front of Minghao’s shirt when their tongues meet. Minghao goes to twist his tongue inside his mouth, and Junhui whimpers when he feels the barbell. He doesn’t know how to kiss someone with a piercing – hell, he doesn’t even know how to kiss – but Minghao’s tempo is slow and patient, guiding him tenderly.
Junhui thinks he loses his sense of time, and it is only when his lungs protest for air that he finally pulls apart. Minghao rests his forehead against his, and when Junhui’s eyes open, he finds the brunette looking at him with the softest gaze that makes Junhui melt right in his arms.
“So… ” Minghao starts, drawing a teasing smile on his lips. “What does it feel like?”
Junhui laughs softly, drunk on joy. “I can’t tell… yet…”
“Oh,” Minghao says, hardly surprised. “Do you want to test again?”
Junhui is already closing his eyes when he says breathlessly against Minghao’s lips, “Please.”
Perhaps, getting to know what kissing someone with a piercing feels like will take more than an hour—or a day for that matter. Perhaps, the only way to know is trying this every day, and when Junhui suggests that to Minghao, he is incredibly happy to know that Minghao is more than eager to help him figure it out for as long as he needs.