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“Yo, I actually can’t believe we got a special tour here. In the mother fucking palace, Stiles, this is amazing,” Stiles’ friend, Rob, said as he shook Stiles’ arm.
“Excuse me, you doubted me, so this isn't a “we got a tour,” it’s a “Stiles got a tour,”” Stiles huffed out as they walked into a room with several people from their architecture class, including some of the more annoying and obnoxious people that they go to school with them.
Mr. Plan started by having everyone thank stiles for getting them the exclusive tour of Prince Derek’s Palace. He reminded everyone that while this was an amazing experience, this was a class field trip and was for a grade.
“Please follow me,” a sweet young woman said as she pushed through a hidden door and held it open for the class to follow her through. “Today, I will be taking you all on a tour of this palace.”
A bubblegum bubble popped loudly, “Why is it not called a castle,” Hannah the bubble popping menace asked.
“This is, in fact, a palace and not a castle because it is residential and not built for protection,” the guide responded cheerfully. “This is not only a private tour, but a tour that was created by the man Prince Derek is courting. Today you will see all of his favorite views and places in the palace.”
A murmur rolled its way through the students. To public knowledge, Prince Derek was not courting or had plans to court anyone. This was big news, news that would spread like wildfire after they left the palace.
Hannah caught up to Stiles while he was sitting on a stone balcony and looking through the bars of the railing down at a large courtyard.
“Sup, Jelly Bean,” she said and popped her gum bubble obnoxiously in his ear.
“Oh… you know, I was having a peaceful moment to myself,” Stiles said, his voice dripping with frustration.
“Well, I think you should go on a date with Joey from our econ class. Y’all would be cute together.” She carried on without much thought.
“Would you please please shut the fuck up about trying to get me a date. I don’t need to be freaking set up are you flipping kidding with me,” Stiles blew up in her face.
“Sorry,” she spat, “you just kind of suck on your own.”
Stiles looked up at her with disbelief.
“What the- you know what, Hannah, thanks for your vote of confidence,” Stiles fumed.
He turned to walk back into the hall that everyone was milling around in, but was stopped by the tour guide. The tour guide who everyone on the tour had yet to realize that she was Princess Cora Hale.
“I heard what she just said. I will not allow my future brother in law be treated that way. I am going to have her-” Cora ranted, but was stopped by Stiles raising his hand dismissively.
“Cora, my dear, they don’t know, nobody knows that he’s courting me. And unless the two of you have been scheming about a ‘surprise’ visit from our favorite prince, they will continue not to know.” Stiles started to giggle as he watched Cora’s eyes turned mischievous.
She scampered away, but not before smacking Stiles’ shoulder with her clipboard.
“Holy shit did you just flirt with her?!” Hannah squealed, “OMG! I ship it!”
“I’m just going to ignore you,” Stiles grimaced.
“Alright everyone, we are going to head to one of the towers in the residential area!” Cora called to the group.
Stiles got the hell away from Hannah and walked over to where Rob and his friends were walking.
“Is Hannah still trying to set you up with people, Stiles?” Rob asked with a knowing smirk.
“Oh shut up, I can do just fine on my own.” Stiles shot back, “maybe I need new friends.” He teased.
“You wound me.” Rob faked an injury and stumbled around playfully.
“No, but seriously, stiles,” Rob’s friend Daryl said grinning, “what is it going to take to get you set up with someone?”
The mood instantly dropped. Everyone went quiet and looked between Stiles and Daryl.
“Oh for the love of- CORA!” Stiles yelled and everyone jumped.
The perky tour guide skipped over to them, practically oozing with glee.
"Yes?” She asked sweetly.
“Make it happen,” Stiles growled while glaring at Daryl.
“Are we talking about-” Cora questioned.
“YES. Do whatever you have to do, but make it happen.” Stiles signed and walked briskly away from the tour and into a door.
Everyone looked at the tour guide, who didn’t look the slightest bit confused or worried about losing one of the students on her tour in a massive castle.
"Excuse me, ma’am,” Mr. Plan strode up next to Cora, “We can’t just leave one of my students.”
“I have complete confidence that he will be fine,” Cora said and turned back to the group of students behind her, “Everyone listen up, we are going to the royal gardens, consider yourself lucky, the gardens are never open to the public. Feel free to touch, but do not pick. Meet back in about an hour and a half, we will be having dinner in the main hall.” Two guards opened glass double doors out into an earthy smelling path. “Please stay in pairs, and if you get lost, ‘marco-polo’ to find me or another group.”
Pairs and groups split from the entrance and scurried into the maze of flowers.
Once everyone was gone except Rob, a guard who was stationed at the glass door turned to Cora and said, “Stiles ran through here earlier. I think he headed for the tree.”
“Thank you, Grayson, I’ll go look for him,” She said with a nod.
“Well I’m going with you,” Rob said as she marched after Cora.
“I don’t think we have been properly introduced.” Rob stuck his hand out to Cora and she shook it awkwardly. “I am Rob, Stiles’ best friend and I’m totally confused how that guard new Stiles’ name.”
She spun around to face him.”Nice to meet you, Rob, My name is Princess Cora Hale.” Her eyes glinted as Rob’s jaw dropped to his knees. “And if you say anything to anyone about my status I will punch you in the spleen.”
There was silence as Cora watched Rob grapple with this newfound information.
“Okay…. I think I…. alright, I’m good….” Rob continued to double take at stiles for a couple seconds and then snapped to attention. “Let’s go find Stiles.”
“I’m pretty sure he is climbing. If the guard was right we will find him there.” Cora advised Rob. “That kid is stubborn. You know that? I swear he tries to give me heart attacks weekly. It took us an entire month to convince him that he needed a harness while climbing. I mean, it's not like we can’t afford it.”
“So wait,” Rob butted in, “how often is he here. I mean, I know people get special privileges because they are students, but he can’t just walk through the front gates here, can he?”
“Sort of. It’s kind of hard to explain, but I know you will get answers around lunchtime.” She answered confidently, so Rob let it drop.
Cora leads Rob to the base of a massive Cedar tree, where one side of a climbing rope was fixed to the ground and the other end swung idly.
Cora looked at Rob mischievously and gripped the rope. She leaned are arm back and wiped it against the tree as hard as she could, sending ripples up to where a person was hanging almost too far to see against the sunlight. A yelp could be heard from the ground and Cora snickered.
“Cora!” Stiles yelled and he started to repel down the tree rapidly, running into branches as he went. “I told you to stop doing that! It hurts!” Stiles did a full superhero landing on his feet right in front of Cora. “Rob? What are you doing here?”
Rob looked at Stiles blandly for a moment, “Uhhh. The class is wandering around the gardens?”
“Wow, okay.” Stiles rubbed the back of his neck. “I had no idea he would actually approve the gardens to be open.” He stepped out of his harness and hung it on a small stand hidden by the base of the tree.
“You are breaking his shell, Stiles, be proud,” Cora said punching his shoulder lightly.
“I have so many questions,” Rob breathed out and ran his hands through his hair.
“I believe that most of them will be answered at lunch, but if you have questions about the castle right now I’d be delighted to answer them,” Cora responded, looking at her watch, “we need to head back toward the doors eventually and I need to make sure everything is set up.”
“Thank you for lunch, Princess,” Stiles said with a smirk and she smacked him with her clipboard again.
“Don’t call me that or I’ll call you-” Cora started to threaten.
"DON’T YOU DARE.” Stiles snapped back at her, shoving her with his shoulder.
“Mr. Plan can you make sure that everyone is here because I don’t have a list and I don’t really remember how many people we had,” Cora asked.
Everyone stood looking board as Mr. Plan rustles around in his bag searching for and eventually finding his roster. They all were even more board when he started to read off every name from the list, only to find that no one was missing. With a thumbs up to Cora, she continued on into a massive hall, with a long table in the middle of it.
Everyone scrambled to sit on the benches, mouths watering from the delicious display of food within arms reach.
“Please dig in! Let me know if any of you need anything, dietary restrictions, allergies, anything,” Cora chirped cheerfully.
She took a seat by the kitchen door and started writing things down in a small notebook she pulled off a chain on her neck.
“I am a vegan,” Hannah announced herself in front of Cora.
Cora looked up with a fake-sweet smile and rung a bell that attached to the door frame.
A chef came out, greeted Hannah and took her into the kitchen to decide what she wanted to eat. A few moments later she came out of the kitchen grinning like a madman and holding a large pizza.
The students found a little bit of everything on this table. There was everything from chicken tenders to sushi.
“Yoooo,” Daryl sighed as he rested his forehead on the table, “This is some Hogwarts level of food.”
People snickered at his glazed over tryptophan look.
After everyone had completely gorged themselves, Cora came over and announced that dessert would be brought out on carts in a few moments.
“I wonder how much those thrones cost,” Hannah mused out loud to herself.
“Prince Derek’s are not gilded, I can tell you that much. The one on the left is solid marble,” Stiles mumbles sleepily.
Everyone looked at him.
“See this is why you don’t have a significant other,” Hannah said, “You have too much strange knowledge rumbling around in your head to be really interesting.”
Stiles just humped in response. He picked himself off the bench, trudged up the altar and plopped himself sideways on Prince Derek’s throne. He shifted around, trying to find the most comfortable way to lay. He even went as far as to grab some cloth blanket looking thing over his body for warmth.
"Stiles! What in the hell are you doing?!” Mr. Plan boomed from across the ballroom.
The class rushed over to inspect Stiles like he was a dead body.
“Well we are fucked,” Hannah whispered, still nibbling on a piece of pizza.
“You need to get your ass off that throne right now,” Mr. Plan yelled, red in the face now. He lunged forward, grabbed Stiles’ arm and tried to pull him out of the magnificent chair.
“Excuse me,” A voice called from the grand marble staircase to the left of the thrones. “I am honored that you think you need to protect my throne, but it’s literally just a fancy chair.” Prince Derek stepped gracefully down the stairs towards the group of students.
Some of the students gaped like guppies and some bowed their heads to the royalty.
“Prince Derek, I apologize. One of my students has been acting up all day. I promise that he will be punished when we return to school.” Mr. Plan said in a flurry, bowing several times during the few words.
Everyone simply stared
“Well, let's see what this student has to say, hmm?” The prince started forward and the crowd split for him. He crouched down so he was slightly higher than Stiles’ head, and poked him in the forehead.
A ripple of nervous laughter spread through the students as Stiles swatted back blindly at the prince.
“Sleeping….. G’way,” Stiles mumbled, twisting around again so his face was pushed into the back of the throne.
“Can you tell me why you are ‘acting out?’” Prince Derek smiled at him when Stiles picked his head up and looked right at him. Stiles did not react to the notion of the prince that was right in front of him.
“Because those butt faces are trying to set me up with people and I’m done with it,” Stiles grumbled and gestured at Hannah and Rob. “I am done with their shit. I can do just fine on my own.” Stiles whined this time now, pushed his head farther on the arm of the chair and his forehead bumped Derek’s.
“Well I sure didn’t expect you to keep your mouth shut for that long,” the prince smirked.
“Oh shut your face, Prince Perfect,” Stiles threw back at him.
“Stiles, please, please, please, be nice to the Prince who so kindly accepted us into his castle.” Mr. Plan said and fidget with his clipboard.
“Prince Derek actually didn’t approve this visit,” Cora said from behind the crowd, “His consort for forced him.” She was standing in the back, holding a bowl of chocolate ice cream, looking rather amused.<
“Yes, he did.” The prince admitted with a small blush under his beard. “He claimed that it was a great learning experience for his class.”
“Hey!” Stiles mewled. “I think this was a very educational field trip. Your consort sounds like a pretty great catch.”
“Wow, Stiles. Look at that modesty.” Prince Derek laughed sarcastically and held his hand out to the scrawny student.
Stiles stood up and the blue cloth that he had thrown over himself followed. It became very clear that he had put on Prince Derek’s cape that was folded over the back of the chair in preparation for a future banquet.
“Aw, look at you wearing my colors,” The Prince cooed. “They look lovely on you babe.”
One might say that you could hear a pin drop, but that would be a lie. You could, however, hear a plate shatter on the ground.
Everyone flinched at the sound of the ceramic hitting the hard floor.
“Okay, WHAT?” Hannah held up her hands in shock.
Stiles smirked and Derek blushed, bowing his head.
“Oh man, this is the best reality TV ever!” Cora spoke out from behind the group.
“Princess Cora Hale, everyone,” Stiles said grinning, his hand leading him into a graceful bow.
She turned bright red and held up her hands defensively.
“This little intervention is not about me,” She said, successfully switching everyone's attention back to Stiles.
“So every time I tried to set you up with someone…” Rob started.
“I politely declined because I have a fucking boyfriend. You just wouldn’t hear me.” Stiles barked.
“Ah, well I guess I can exactly threaten the prince about messing with my friend’s heart can I,” Rob muttered.
“No, probably not.” Stiles looked up at Derek, seemly searching his face for something new. After a moment he smiled. “If he messes with my heart you will be the first person I call, but I can rain down hellfire on him like nothing else.”
“There will never ever be a reason for me to mess with your heart, I love it too much,” Derek said sweetly and kissed the back of Stiles’ hand softly.
There was an awwwwwww from some of the people in the group as Stiles dragged the Prince back up the stairs, waving goodbye over the balcony, and disappearing.
