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Eijirou was jolted awake by a dream, but its contents were forgotten within a second. His stomach growled, but the warmth next to him dissuaded him from acting on it. His phone sat to the right of him on the floor. Right, he was with Denki, sleeping with him on the futon. He was never quite fond of sleeping on the floor. With a sigh a little too dramatic for the middle of the night, Eijirou let his head slump back to the pillow.
The body next to him stirred but did not turn to face him. Eijirou shifted his head to look at Denki as quietly as he could. He saw Denki inhale, so his words did not make him flinch.
"Ei?"
Eijirou hummed.
A beat passes before Denki tries again, "Are you up?"
"No," Eijirou meant it as a joke, but his voice was too hazy with sleep to provide for any variation.
Denki turned around, his black silhouette the only thing visible in the dark. Eijirou couldn't wait for his eyes to adjust. "Ei."
Hearing desperation, Eijirou's throat threatens to close, "Kaminari?"
Just as Eijirou's eyes acclimate to the dark, Denki covers his face, "Are you going to leave?"
Thoroughly concerned, Eijirou relocates from his back to his side, "No." Slowly, he brings his fingers to wrap around Denki's wrist, "Are you okay?"
When Eijirou tugs on Denki's hand, he flinches away. "Yeah," Denki choked out. Eijirou withdrew his hand so that Denki could wipe away his own tears.
"You're not," Eijirou said, a little louder. Denki just shakes his head in response.
Denki then whips over onto his stomach and smashes his face into the pillow. Eijirou's heart crumbles when he sees the other violently shaking against the sheets. Denki stays silent, until he hiccups, which seems to push him over the edge. He grips the thin futon while he muffles his squeaks by use of the pillow-case. "Ugh," he rubs the back of his neck, his sniffling showing no sign of stopping, "Fuck."
Eijirou blinked rapidly to stop himself from crying himself. Whatever this was, it wasn't about him. He pinched the bridge of his nose. "Hey," Eijirou soothed, "I'm not going anywhere. I'll be next to you when you wake up in the morning, okay?"
Despite Eijirou's intention, Denki bursts into another fit of sobs. Eijirou winces. Denki's face hid in the comfort of the pillow and would probably stay there until the night was over. "Okay," Denki warbled, the very act of speaking making him more vulnerable to tears.
Eijirou rubbed his eyes vigorously, surprised with how well he had held his composure considering the situation. Denki's throaty noises slowly died down into more hiccups, and his shoulders were almost free of tremors. Abruptly— just like all of his previous actions— Denki pulled the pillow he was just crying into over his head, "Shit, I'm so embarrassed."
"It's alright," Eijirou whispered. "Do you want—" Eijirou would shrug if he wasn't on the ground, "Do you want anything?"
"You." Denki decided into the floor. "You're enough," he couldn't quite rid his voice of stutters just yet.
"Fuck," Eijirou puffed a chuckle, "But I have to piss, dude."
Eijirou worried that it was too soon, but it wasn't because Denki shook with laughter. He finally ceased his abuse on his pillow and flipped on his back. Eijirou saw him stare at the ceiling, eyes empty with a forced, cynical smile. He couldn't differentiate the shine on Denki from tears, snot, or just the texture of his face. Denki always had oily skin.
Eijirou bends his back to sit up, but Denki's hand scrabbles for an arm to grab onto, "Ei—"
"I told you I'm not leaving," Eijirou repositions himself so that his cheek rests on his knuckle, "Okay?"
"Okay," Denki visibly quivers, "Thank you."
After a stiff minute of inactivity, Denki finally meets Eijirou's thick stare. His eyes were still blown wide, the tip of his nose twitched when his eyes squinted. Eijirou offered a reassuring smile that Denki could not reciprocate. "Hey," Eijirou whispers, "Come here."
Eijirou pats his chest, the action finally teasing a smile from Denki's lips. Eijirou tried to snake his arm underneath Denki's neck, who lifted his head to allow for it. He sighs in satisfaction when Denki presses his forehead to his chest. "This is nice."
Denki snorts, but his hidden face does nothing to tell him whether it's genuine, "You think?"
"Yeah," Eijirou rubs circles into Denki's back, "You're nice."
Denki exhales shakily, warming Eijirou's skin through the fabric of his shirt. "Shut up, man," Denki mumbled, but his arms tightening around Eijirou's middle suggested otherwise.
"You smell good, too," Eijirou was half lying, Denki hadn't showered since the day before.
"Ei," Denki whined. Eijirou could feel the heat of the other's blush on his neck.
"Kaminari," Eijirou laughed softly into the other man's hair, "Can you say my name again?"
Denki hesitates, "Eijirou."
Heart fluttering, Eijirou laughed again, this time pulling Denki closer, "You sound so good when you say it."
Denki shifts his head to the crook of Eijirou's neck, "You're a loser."
"Compared to you," Eijirou hums.
Denki's heart thrums in his chest. Instead of replying, he drags his hands down from Eijirou's back and fumbles with the hem of the other man's shirt.
Eijirou shivers, "What are you— shit!" Denki slips his hands under Eijirou's shirt, "Kaminari, your hands are cold."
"Well your skin is warm," Denki replies.
That warmth stayed with the both of them through the night.
Eijirou didn't have another dream, and neither did Denki, seeing as they were in the same position when Eijirou woke again. His arm was numb from the other man sleeping on it. Eijirou's bladder and stomach alike screamed at him for relief, but Denki's beating heart screamed louder. He had to wake him up first.
Eijirou's memory of the night before was almost as vivid as when it was happening, and he couldn't miss Denki's adversity to being left alone. He hasn't been the same since graduation. It was subtle enough to be looked over at first, but Eijirou was starting to become uncertain of how to act. Denki was less smiley, less happy, less electric.
Oddly enough, Eijirou could never read Denki as well as he could with Mina or Katsuki. It wasn't that he is closer to them, it was just that their ways of expressing themselves are different. Eijirou and Mina have known each other so long that they could convey paragraphs upon paragraphs of thought with just a single twitch of an eye. Katsuki— while he'd never admit it— wore his emotions on his sleeve, and the more nuanced side to his insane complexity was only deciphered by Eijirou just because he was the only one who Katsuki let in.
But Denki, he hid his thoughts behind a false bravado of baseless confidence and fabricated stupidity. Eijirou knew he was smart, smarter than him. Eijirou couldn't tell the difference between Denki's varying smiles like he could for Mina, he couldn't tell the difference between Denki's varying inflections like he could for Katsuki. Eijirou likes to believe that it's because he's never gotten a hint. But that's what makes him so exciting.
When Denki smiles it's because of Eijirou. He doesn't need to understand it, not when it makes his heart pound so deliciously against his ribs. It's okay if Eijirou is confused by something because he can guess. So many times he had misinterpreted a raised eyebrow, a purse of the lips. Yet so many times, he had understood. It was exhilarating, constantly discovering things he had never known.
Every time Denki smiles, Eijirou has to make a conscious effort to keep his knees from shaking. Every time their shoulders brush, Eijirou isn't sure if the shock is from Denki's quirk or if it's from his own fixation.
But lately Denki has been smiling, and they have been touching. Eijirou feels nothing. While he's humble, he can't deny that over the years of high school, Denki's expressions had started making sense; Eijirou was just getting the hang of recognizing them before Denki's eyes lost their color. The smiles were less frequent, he would shy away from touch.
Eijirou just hoped that it wasn't his fault.
Very slowly, Eijirou frees his arm out from underneath Denki. He thought that it would be enough to wake him up so he didn't have to say anything, but it didn't work. "Kaminari," Eijirou pressed into Denki's shoulder, "Kaminari."
Denki moved away from Eijirou's touch with a protesting grunt.
Eijirou shakes him slightly, "I'm going to the bathroom, alright?"
Denki opens his eyes not even half-way. He stares at Eijirou through his lashes, uninterested. He nods.
Eijirou's chest flickers.
His joints pop on their own when he stands, he doesn't even check his phone, eager to get back to the comfort of the futon as quick as possible. Eijirou spends little time in the bathroom, but he does take a moment to stare at himself in the mirror. His eyes were foggy, they reminded him of the way that Denki was looking at the ceiling the night before. There was a possibility that Eijirou hadn't quite been himself since graduation either.
When Eijirou returned to his room, Denki was sitting upright and rubbing the sleep from his eyes.
"It's not time to leave yet," Eijirou said, almost desperately.
Denki smiled, he must have caught on to that. He falls back against the sheets, with a sigh that could have been considered satisfied, "Thank you for waking me up before you left."
Eijirou was pretty sure that wasn't sarcasm, but he stayed quiet to find out.
"When I was little, sometimes I would get nightmares so bad that my mom could hear me screaming from the other room, she would come in and lay in the bed with me until I fell asleep again. And every time it happened, the next morning she would be gone, without fail," Denki smiled grimly, "I don't know if it was my crazy little kid emotions or whatever, but it felt like shit."
Eijirou shifted into the spot next to Denki, the residual heat from earlier calming him. He lays on his side, looking at Denki in the same way he had the night before.
"So I'm happy that today," Denki turns on his side as well, "I woke up next to you."
Seeing Denki's smile, Eijirou couldn't contain himself. He wrapped his arms around Denki's waist and rolled over on his back, pulling Denki over him so that they were chest to chest. "Me too, dude."
Denki laughed, half in mocking and half in surprise, "Why're you being so nice to me lately?"
"No," Eijirou beams into Denki's neck, "That's you. You're being nice to me."
Denki sighs, his muscles expanding against Eijirou, "You make it easy."
"So," Eijirou begins, "That was a nightmare? Last night?"
Denki laughs sheepishly, shaking his head, "Nah. I didn't get to sleep until you started talking to me."
Eijirou distances himself a little to look at Denki, "Really?"
"Really," Denki clips, becoming increasingly more uncomfortable.
Noticing this, Eijirou furrowed his brows, "Then what was happening?"
"Um," their closeness suddenly becomes too intimate for Denki, for he sits up again, "I'm just a little scared about going away today I guess."
"Oh, yeah," Eijirou sits up with him, causing Denki to slide into his lap, "You've never flown before."
"Yeah," Denki sweats, but for once, Eijirou can see that there's more to it.
"Is that it?" Eijirou mumbles with doubt.
Denki looks downward, but tension draws his shoulders upward. Shakily, he grumbles, "I'm just scared in general," Denki then looks to the ceiling, "Eijirou, you realize that this is it, right?"
Eijirou's stomach flips, "What?"
"This. Us. You and Bakugou and Mina and Sero and everyone," Denki huffs, "We're never going to talk again!"
He was right. Eijirou knew that, he's known for a while now, but it never affected him too badly. He always knew that the friends he made in high school would never stick, not all of them, so he didn't know why Denki was beating himself up over it, "I don't understand."
"It'll be gone so quick, Ei. It'll be so quick that it's stupid." Denki snorts angrily, "All of the emotions and effort over the three years will be a fucking joke."
Eijirou withdrew.
"In college, I'll look back on my relationships and dismiss them because all it took to destroy them was a summer break," Denki slouched and met Eijirou's eyes, "What I'm feeling with you or anyone else is so deep, Eijirou. And It's going to be trivialized just because of how quick it disappeared."
"Kaminari," Eijirou placed his hand on Denki's chest in a sad attempt at consolation.
"Then I'll just make more meaningless friends for another few years and lose them too," Denki rolled his eyes. A moment of silence passes, then two. Denki straightens, his eyes blown wide. As he runs his hand through his hair in disbelief, "Holy shit, Kirishima," Denki stutters, "We're going to be fucking strangers."
Eijirou's heartbeat blips at his surname. It sounded so unfamiliar on Denki's tongue. The hand on Denki's chest fell back to Eijirou's side. Hurt, Eijirou bites, "Did you just not know about situational tolerances? Friends of circumstance? Tell me you don't really think that all of our friendships were going to last—"
"I know," Denki raised his voice. He collapsed in on himself and started again, quieter, "I know. I just wish I knew before I started loving everyone, before I started loving—"
Denki paused and looked at Eijirou. You, Eijirou's ears strained, but it never came out of Denki's mouth. Eijirou didn't need to hear it to see it, for Denki was staring wide at him. After Denki finally realized, he started shaking.
Seeing Denki's chest heave, Eijirou wraps his arms tightly around Denki's middle, pulling him in so that there was as little space as possible. Denki reciprocated quickly, his hands scrabbling at Eijirou's back. Eijirou sighs exasperatedly, "You don't have to worry about any of that shit, alright?"
Denki hiccups. Eijirou runs his hands through the blonde's hair, "Okay, Kaminari? You just have to think about what's happening now, whatever happens in the future happens."
Denki relocates his arms and encircles Eijirou's neck, "Okay, Eijirou." He hums against Eijirou's nape, "I'm going to miss you."
Eijirou had prevented Denki from crying, but he may not be able to stop himself. "I'm going to miss you too, so much." Denki's laugh was breathy, it sounded like heaven. They stayed like that, with Denki's legs around Eijirou's torso and with Eijirou's hand in Denki's hair. Eijirou broke the silence, "I can't believe that you were thinking so hard about that."
Eijirou only meant it to fill the air, but Denki tensed against him. After an unnerving silence, Denki retorted, "What, you're trying to say you aren't thinking about this stuff whenever you're missing Bakugou? The light of your fucking life, apparently?"
He was at a loss for words. Katsuki was studying abroad, just like Denki, only he flew at the beginning of summer to get acclimated to where he would be living. Katsuki was one of, if not the best friend that Eijirou had, so of course he was a little down about it. Denki always got so needlessly jealous over Katsuki. Eijirou separated just enough to get a read on Denki's face. He was only met with a bitter stare.
After confirming that Denki was being difficult, Eijirou scoffed incredulously, "Are you seriously going to go there?"
Denki looked off, his expression pulled tight. His hands clenched from where they rested on Eijirou's shoulders.
Eijirou rolls his eyes, his own hands sliding from Denki's back to his hips, "You really need to stop bringing that shit up."
Denki releases his grip on Eijirou and gets off of him. He stands and walks to the door, leaving Eijirou to sit alone on the futon. "What do you want for breakfast?" Denki says distantly.
Eijirou was too frustrated to hear what food he replied with, but he'd find out when Denki made it for him anyway.
Mina and Hanta meet up with Eijirou and Denki at the airport. Denki had told them numerous times that they really didn't have to come, but they insisted that they wanted to see him off. Eijirou was glad to be there too, it was one last time for all of them to hang out, even if Katsuki wasn't there.
They had as much fun as a group can have at an airport, which is more than most people would like to think. They all fucked around on the moving walkway, but Mina demanded that they be called horizontal escalators. Denki pointed out an arcade, and wow, did was this airport filled with a lot of shit.
Eventually, Eijirou and Denki sat on a bench while Mina and Hanta talked about where they should get food.
"I’m kind of sleepy, so I think we should go to that coffee shop we saw on the way in," Mina gestured in the direction.
"I don't care, I'm just hungry," Hanta shrugged.
"What do you guys think?" Mina and Hanta turned to the others.
Denki shrugged, "Am I supposed to be picking a side?"
Eijirou laughs, "There's no side to pick, it's a yes or no."
Denki leaned towards Eijirou, "I wasn't listening," he stage-whispered with an exaggerated hand blocking the view of his mouth.
Mina theatrically swatted at Denki with a travel brochure that some employee had forcefully handed to her earlier, while Hanta shook his head in mock disappointment. "Fine! I don't need your input anyway, Hanta and I are going!" Mina then smiles, "Do you guys want anything?"
Denki waves his hand, "Nah, I don't want to have to go to the bathroom on the flight."
Eijirou shakes his head, "I already ate."
Understanding Denki's reasoning, Mina moves on to assault Eijirou, "Are you sure you don't want a muffin, Ei?"
Shit. His weakness. Eijirou shrugs sheepishly, "What the hell. Sure."
"Alright!" Mina takes Hanta by the arm, "See you guys in a bit!"
Eijirou looks to Denki. He's pale. "Kaminari. It's going to be fine."
Denki exhales a breath that he was holding, "I hope so."
He pulls out his phone. His blood runs cold.
"Kaminari?"
"Fuck," Denki stands, clutching his luggage like a lifeline, "I'm going to miss it."
Eijirou stands with him and looks to his phone as well. Time really flies when you're trying to prevent it's movement. When he looks up again, Denki is already speed-walking in the direction of his station. Eijirou follows him. Luckily, Denki figured out where he was supposed to go when they first go to the airport for a situation just like this.
Eijirou felt dizzy, his only focus on Denki. This is it, he had said earlier. Why now was Eijirou just realizing? This would be his last day with the one who really mattered. He knew this whole time but it was finally happening. Did he just not believe it? Was he used to Denki always being there like the constant he was?
"It's here," Denki huffs, his back to Eijirou as he looks at the door that leads to his plane. People were flooding into it. They'd got there just in time.
"It's here," Eijirou parroted.
Denki turned around.
In response, Eijirou's head jerked to his feet, he couldn't bear to look. "Kaminari—"
"Eijirou," Denki demanded. Ejirou looked at his friend's frightened eyes and trembling lip, but his eyebrows were knit tight. He had nothing to say.
"I'm going to miss you—"
"Don't," Denki choked, his expression wavering. "Call me. Every night. Even if you think I'm asleep."
Eijirou's heart starts hammering in anxiety. It was too soon, he wasn't ready.
"It's not forever, we'll see each other again," Denki droned, clearly not believing what he was saying. Eijirou felt the sting of acceptance, the acceptance that this was the end.
"Promise me," Eijirou blurts, "Promise me you'll come back to me. Christmas break, a week, a day, an hour, whatever. Please say you'll come back to me."
Denki is taken aback, he presses his own hand against his chest. Eijirou hoped that Denki's heart hurt just as much as his. "Okay," Denki inhales, a smile twitching at his lip, "I promise."
The last of the people trickle in, and Denki needs to leave. Eijirou felt tears pricking his eyes and paper in his throat. He craved Denki's touch but he couldn't hug him, couldn't kiss him; he would cry, his knees would give out, he would faint. He suffices by squeezing Denki on his shoulder twice and sliding down to grab his hand. Eijirou rubs a single circle into Denki's knuckle, "I—"
"Eijirou," Denki laughs bitterly, "Save it. I'm not dying."
That's what he said, but it sure felt different when he saw Denki's back. It sure felt different when he saw Denki step through the door. Once the door closed, Denki was dead. Once the door closed, Kaminari Denki was nothing but another faceless hero in a world full of faceless villains.