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“And where is he now?” Finn asked a pretty flustered WWE official.
The Irishman was looking for Shinsuke Nakamura. He saw his championship match and how he lost it to AJ. He saw how emotional Shinsuke had become and how this emotions got the best of him. He brutally beat down AJ, a friend of both man, and just rushed off.
No word to Finn.
“I don’t know, but the bosses said he doesn’t take losses lightly and it’s better to let him go!” the ref told Finn like he wouldn’t already know the fact. So he just rolled his eyes and turned around to Luke and Karl. Good friends, he trusted both more than anybody in the world, but they probably would rattle up the Japanese man even more. “Guys, I can’t party with you… I… I’ve to look after him!” Finn didn’t want to explain everything. Karl and Luke knew how complicated their relationship had been and still was. They hadn’t been a huge fan of this, but kept silent as long as there hadn’t been a problem. “But he beat up AJ! You remember AJ? The guy with this long brown fuzzy hair? You called him your friend!” Luke asked, crossing his massive arms in front of his chest. Finn looked up to him, before he directed his view to Karl. The slight smaller buddy wasn’t amused, too. Finn shook his head and looked up again to Luke. “Sure I didn’t forget that!” Karl sighed: “And now the “but” follows.” He murmured. Finn shot an angry look at his friend. “AJ knew what Shinsuke is capable off and how he works. It was stupid that he didn’t retreat after the match. Shinsuke is my friend, he never was yours or his! He seems like a very fun guy, like a goofy puppy, but…” Finn paused and shook his head.
They just wouldn’t understand the pressure Shinsuke put on himself, to be perfect, to be art, to be… Shinsuke. They wouldn’t understand and Shinsuke wouldn’t like that Finn discussed his personal demons with others. So the Irishman just shook his head. “It’s complicated, but I love him!” he ended it, like he ended many arguments with Luke and Karl.
The typical reaction of his friends followed. They didn’t answer, they just shook their heads. “Then… go!” The resignation was audible in Karl’s voice. His friend would accept their relationship, but not approve it.
Finn drew back some steps and looked at the concerned faces of his buddies before he turned around and head down the hallway. He didn’t know where to look for, but he would start the obvious way… he looked through some of the lockers of the SmackDown folks. When Suke was upset in any way, he normally isolated himself, but in a WWE Locker Room, no matter how big the stadium was, you couldn’t sneak away without at least some one notice. That was why Finn was looking some where he was sure he didn’t find his boyfriend, but at least he would find some information.
The first and second try were a miss. They hadn’t seen him, but three is a lucky charm, so as he inspected the next locker, he met Daniel Bryan. Visible hurting, but happy the SDlive GM was sitting on a wooden bench, with him his wife and baby girl.
“Oh, erm… hi Daniel!” Finn and the fan favorite hadn’t talk much. “I’m … ah… looking for Shinsuke… do you know where he is?” he asked, his view switching between the adults in the room. Daniel nodded. “Yeah, but… why are you looking for him? You won’t start a fight, because of how he treated AJ?” Daniel asked carefully, brushing his messy hair back. His wife held their baby girl tight on their lap, almost as Finn would be a danger.
The Irish raised his hand. “For God’s sake, no! I… you know… I like AJ, he’s kind of my friend, but…” again he swallowed “I know how to handle Shinsuke when he is like that!” Brie smiled and shook her head silently. Daniel noticed and looked over to his wife. They maintained eye contact like they would talk in a telepathic way, before Daniel looked over to Finn again. “I have sent Shinsuke to his hotel room. You probably know where that is, don’t you?” Daniel said. Finn confirmed with some quick nods. Yeah, he knew exactly where that was, since he was sharing the room with Shinsuke.
He was about to turn away, as he heard Daniel’s question. “You love him?” he asked and Finn jerked around to look at Daniel again. He wasn’t as secretive as his friend Seth Rollins was, but he didn’t like to wash his dirty clothes in public. “Don’t be afraid. I’m no longer an authority figure… just Daniel Bryan. We will tell on Tuesday, but… I noticed things the last months.” Finn smiled. “Yeah, I do. It’s a pretty complicated story, but I do!” he endorsed still smiling.
Daniel stood up and walked over some steps. “Tell me about complicated!” he looked over to his wife. Brie just chuckled while she rolled her eyes. “I really hope you can calm him down… it was shocking to see him loose his mind over a championship.” Daniel really sounded concerned. Finn had to admit the guy was one of the good ones. “It’s not just a championship, not just another belt to collect for Shinsuke. He left his home, his country, his territory to do this. He would have survived to lose the Rumble easily, but he won! And he tasted the air, he thought he could do what no other man could do. Win the Rumble and the Mania match in his first main roster year… he thought he would ace the match, he did it before with AJ, but… he lost… and everything crumbled… Shinsuke is a good man… sometimes, but like me… there is a demon inside of him.” Daniel seemed to survey Finn’s face. He looked deep down into his eyes before a short nod followed. “It seems like you know what you are doing.”
Suddenly a grin light up Finn’s face. “I always know what I’m doing, but thanks for caring!”
Finn said goodbye to the Bryan Family and made his way back to his hotel. Actually he wasn’t allowed to leave yet, since the show was still running. But who would know? He had ended his match and others appointments and there were so many people in the back, no one would miss him. Yeah, somebody would see him sneak away, but Finn was pretty sure, he wasn’t the only one he would leave early.
Finn didn’t know what would wait for him on the other side of the hotel room door.
His heart raced.
The Irish remembered pretty well, how happy Suke had been after his Rumble win. Finn asked silently: “You nervous?” and his boyfriend just smiled his wide smile with a quick nod. His dark eyes had sparkled. Finn loved this sparkle, it had so much energy.
Yeah, Suke had been nervous. An emotional train wreck, but happy and proud.
But Finn remembered the other Shinsuke very well.
The one that crawls down the last halls of an arena just to hide. The Shinsuke that cries in pain and agony over the loss of a match, he knew he had to win. The Shinsuke that could be overwhelmed by anger and hate towards himself that he would attack other people to feel better. The Shinsuke that stopped caring and just did what come to his mind.
Finn just didn’t know who was waiting behind the door as he unlocked it with his key card.
He saw at first the tripped table in the floor. Some paper and a plastic flower have fallen down. Carefully Finn entered the room. He saw a flipped over chair and after some steps there was the turned mattress. He closed the door and waited a second.
No, his ears weren’t playing him. He heard sobbing.
Finn went on, walked into the bedroom and saw a mess. His own suitcase was neatly closed and unharmed on the last remaining chair, while Shinsuke flipped his own luggage around, the bed, a bystander and so on.
At first, Finn didn't see Suke and almost left the room again to look around in the hotel. But then he heard dry sobbing. The bed was shoved away and the mattress had tripped over. Now it was leaning against the wall, but there was space.
Finn crouched down, to look under the mattress. As soon as Finn had appeared in front of the opening, the sobbing stopped. The view of the Japanese man, who sat under the mattress huddled up and squat in the corner shot up to Finn.
Shin wasn’t sad, he was pissed. That was something the beautiful eyes of Shinsuke were telling him. The tears were tears of anger, not grief. "What are you doing here?" Shinsuke hissed in Japanese. "I'm living here, we share this room!" Finn answered calmly.
He put away the mattress that had leaned on the second bystander before he let himself sink down in cross-legged next to Shin. "Too early!" Shinsuke murmured and let his head sink on his arms again.
"What are you telling me? That you would have cleaned your mess before I would have returned?" Finn asked.
"Don't make fun of me!" his boyfriend groaned "Leave me alone!"
Finn sighed lowly. That was his normal tactics, but he couldn't just quit. He couldn't leave him alone. "No, I won't! I'm here for you!" the Irish answered firm. Shinsuke slowly raised his head again, to look at Finn. "You can't help me. I'm a disappointment, I'm a loser." he muttered, but this time he didn't hide his face again. "You know exactly that this isn't true!" Finn smiled and tried to soothe him. He took Suke’s thoughts seriously, but he knew this wasn’t one of the whole they had dug before. He shifted his weight to his knees, so he could put his palms on Shinsuke’s shoulders. The Japanese man hadn't changed yet, he was still sitting there in his ring gear. His skin felt cold under Finn’s warm fingers. Carefully the Irishman rubbed his shoulders. "You aren't a loser! You are still the artist! You are still Shinsuke Nakamura. The man that changed NXT, that became the first ever Royal Rumble winner at his first competition. You are a Rockstar!" Shinsuke pushed Finn away, pushed him over, so that he landed on his behind. "I'm not an artist!" he hissed and got on his knees. Looked over to Finn. "I'm not a rockstar!" he got louder.
Shinsuke fought himself up on his feet. He looked down to Finn. "I'm the KING of Strong Style. Everybody seemed to forget this, 'cause it doesn't fit in their pretty little world. I earn that name elsewhere or they don't understand what it means. What Strong Style means! AJ got what he deserved!"
Finn looked up. "Do you think I forgot who you are?" he asked lowly. Finn rolled back, tuck up his legs and jumped on his feet again. "Do you think I could forget who you are?" he asked again and both men stared at each other. "I know that you are the king, but I never cared, since you weren't my king.”
Silence fell. Both men stood across each other and looked eyes. "You are a monster!" Shinsuke hissed in English, but suddenly he pulled Finn close into a hot fierce kiss. He clung to the shirt of his lover and wouldn't allow Finn to free himself.
For every other man "monster" would have been an insult, but to Finn out of Suke's mouth not. He had always been his monster or demon. Shinsuke was the reason he even had the idea of his gimmick. He had been Shinsuke's monster, Finn didn't know when it started, but he always felt wonderful and loved due to this nickname.
Slowly Shinsuke retreated, looking down on Finn. Careful he brushed through the short brown hair of the Irish man. "I lost!" it was a painful confession. Finn placed his fingers over Suke's on his cheeks. "I lost mine, too!" Slowly Shinsuke nodded. "I know. We're both losers!" the Japanese whispered. Slowly a smile grew on Finn's lips. "I like more to be a loser with you than a winner on my own, Suke-chan!" Finn endorsed and slowly freed himself.
He wouldn't talk about AJ or the match or anything. He was just glad, that he Shinsuke seemed to be himself again. Shin's fingers ran over Finn's shoulders. He surveyed the appearance of his lover and sighed silently. "I'm sorry I snapped at you… and that I redecorated the room!" Finn chuckled and took a look around. "Yeah, I hope you aren't disappointed that I don't like this new style. Is it okay if we change things back?" he asked. "I mean not immediately, but at some point… at first…" Shinsuke pulled him into another kiss. "First… a shower?" Shinsuke suggested.