Chapter Text
The first time they kissed was the day Kíli was born.
Fíli had been very, very excited over the previous days, because Mama told him that the baby would be coming soon and Papa helped him put soft new blankets in the baby’s bed. Both Mama and Papa stuck close to their borrowed rooms in the Iron Mountains, just in case the time came and Papa needed to run and get Mr. Oin. Fíli had been born “on the road” and Mama said that the new baby would be born somewhere safe, so they were staying with Cousin Dain for a few months.
Fíli knew that being safe was good, so it wasn’t so bad staying in the Iron Hills, even if they couldn’t be in the camp with all the others. If his little sister was safe, he’d be happy.
And it would be a little sister. He was determined of that.
“We don’t know that she’s a girl, sweet one,” Mama said as he curled beside her big belly and pressed his ear against it. They were on the giant bed in Mama and Papa’s room. He liked the bed. It was tall and fluffy and different from the pallets they used in camp. The sheets were really soft and there were furs at the end in case it got too cold.
“’Course she’s a girl!” Fíli scoffed. “Her name’s Kís.” Fíli was named after Papa and Mama, the “í” like Mama and the “li” like Papa. Baby Kís would be named after just Mama because she was a girl.
“Or Kíli,” Mama reminded him with amusement, tugging at a tangle in his hair. He pouted and tried to move his head out of the way, but then he couldn’t listen to his sister. So he gave in with a sigh of resignation. “For a boy.”
“She has to be a girl, Mama!”
“And why is that?” Papa asked as he settled on the bed next to them. He smelled nice, like smoke and roast pork. Fíli gave an appreciative little sniff.
“’Cause I wanna be a big brother,” Fíli announced, “so I gotta have a little sister.”
Papa laughed. He had a nice laugh, all big and bouncy. Mama laughed too, but hers was softer and prettier. Papa had the best laugh for getting up in the morning, but Mama had the best laugh for tucking Fíli in at night. “Fíli, you’ll be a big brother either way!”
“No.” Fíli was certain about this. “Papa is a big brother because of Auntie Tyrda, and Uncle is a big brother because of Mama.”
Mama reached out and gave one of Fíli’s curls a playful tug. “Uncle Thorin became a big brother when your Uncle Frerin was born,” she said, “not when I was born.”
“Nuh uh. Big brothers have little sisters. And big brothers keep them safe, and make sure they eat, and play games with them, and teach them important things, and don’t let anybody tease them just because they’re girls.”
“Just because they’re girls? Who told you that, sweetness?” Mama asked.
“Uncle Thorin.”
Papa laughed again. “I’m pretty sure that your mama remembers to eat better than your uncle, and nobody teases her because she’d beat them up herself.” He leaned over and kissed Mama lightly on the lips. They did that a lot. Fíli didn’t mind because that meant they liked each other and that was good. He did squirm a little impatiently when they decided to kiss again, just because this was important. Being a big brother was the most important thing ever.
“But you can do all those things for a little brother too,” Mama said when they were done kissing. “Don’t worry, Fíli.” She stroked his cheek and tapped his nose. “You’ll be a wonderful big brother no matter what.” She shifted against the pillows. “And I believe you will be a big brother very soon indeed,” she said, and gave Papa a look that Fíli didn’t understand.
Papa suddenly sat up very straight. “Now?!” he asked, his brown eyes shining with excitement.
“Now,” Mama said. “It’s been long enough you can go fetch Oín.”
Papa gave her a funny look, muttered, “And you didn’t think to mention it before?!” and ran out of the room.
Fíli didn’t get to stay while his new little sister was being born, but that was okay. Papa said it was really gross anyway. It took a super long time, too, all night! Fíli tried to stay up, but he finally fell asleep curled up in a chair in his cousin Dain’s room. Dain was nice, even though he was old like Uncle Thorin and Mr. Dwalin and Mr. Balin. He told funny stories and didn’t mind answering lots of questions. He had a son, too, whose name was Thorin like Uncle Thorin, but he was a lot older than Fíli, almost twenty.
He woke up as Papa picked him up out of the chair. “I’m ‘wake,” he mumbled, and Papa chuckled.
“I see that, my fierce little Tiger-Eye,” he said as he carried Fíli into the hallway. “I’m glad to know you’re ‘wake,’ since it’s time for you to meet the baby.”
Fíli was suddenly as wide awake as he claimed. He wiggled to sit up in Papa’s arms, wrapping his arms around Papa’s strong neck. His small, square fingers tangled in Papa’s hair, brown and honey and gold like Fíli’s. “Kís?” he asked with a little wiggle of excitement.
“Ah, well.” Papa stepped into Mama’s room. “Not quite.”
Mama looked very, very tired but also very happy. She was sitting up in the bed in a pretty new nightgown, her hair in a neat braid, and in her arms was a little wrapped-up bundle. “Fíli,” Mama said warmly, and she patted the bed.
Papa set him in that very spot and Fíli cuddled to Mama’s side, astonished to see that a lot of her big belly had gone away. There really had been a baby in there! (Cousin Dain told him that baby dwarflings were brought up from the mines, but Papa said that was silly and dwarflings came from Mamas; Fíli knew Papa would only tell him the truth, but still . . . everything else came up from the mines! Maybe Papa was a little confused.) He kissed her cheek, giggling when her beard tickled his chin.
“Fíli,” Mama said, “I’d like you to meet your baby brother.” She shifted the bundle so that he could see. “This is Kíli.”
Fíli scowled.
He looked between the baby and Mama. “But. He’s a boy.”
“Yes, sweet one, he is.”
Fíli bit his lip. “But I…” The disappointment was crushing. He didn’t know what to do, but he didn’t want to cry in front of Mama! He’d so wanted to be a big, strong brother like Papa and Uncle Thorin!
“Kíli,” Papa said, “is your sweet and loving baby brother. And you,” he gave Fíli’s shoulder a squeeze, “are his brave and loving big brother.” He sat down beside Mama and tugged Fíli into his lap. “I don’t know how you got this idea about big brothers only having little sisters in your head, but Kíli is your little brother. That means he’ll be lots of fun. You can learn to hunt and fight together.”
Fíli snuggled into Papa’s chest. “But Cousin Dain said-”
Mama huffed. Fíli’s eyes widened a little – it was never good when Mama huffed about something. “I should have known it was that rascal who put that idea in your head. Here, now.” She nodded to Papa, who gently took Fíli’s sharp little elbows and rearranged them. Then Mama leaned forward, just a little, and laid her bundle in Fíli’s lap. “It’s time for you to meet your brother. Then you’ll know that you belong together, even if he is a boy.”
Fíli looked suspiciously down at the warm, heavy baby in his lap.
Big, dark eyes blinked up at Fíli, a tiny fist curled against one plump cheek. Mama tucked the blanket back a little, and dark brown curls poked out.
“Say hello, my love,” Mama told him fondly.
Fíli stared, completely awe-struck. The baby was so little. He looked like Mama. He had teenie-tiny fingers. He-
Yawned.
Oh. That was so cute, that was cuter than all the kittens Cousin-Thorin-not-Uncle-Thorin had hidden away in his room. Even the orange one with the stubby little tail who was Fíli’s very very favorite.
“Hello,” Fíli said. He meant to sound very adult and grown up, but it came out as a whisper.
“Hello, Kíli,” Papa prompted.
“Hello, Kíli,” Fíli said, and even though he’d fought that name for three weeks and he’d known the baby’s name would be Kis, now he found he really, really liked it. Kíli. Fíli and Kíli. He beamed.
“You should introduce yourself,” Mama said as she stroked Fíli’s hair.
“Oh!” Fili jumped a little (but only a very, very little, because he didn’t want to bother the baby and the baby was in his lap, all warm and sleepy and heavy). “I’m Fili.” He bowed his head. “At your service.”
“Fíli,” Papa told Kíli, running his rough fingertip over the baby’s tiny forehead, “is your big brother.”
Fíli’s eyes lit up. “Yes!” he cried, utterly relieved (and thinking maybe he should stop asking Cousin Dain any questions at all). “I’m your big brother. Fíli!”
Mama laughed gently and leaned down just as Papa did. They both planted loud kisses on Fíli’s temples – Papa on the right and Mama on the left. They liked to do that. Fíli liked it too.
Fíli wondered if Kíli would like it.
He decided to give it a try.
Fíli leaned down and planted a noisy little kiss right on Kíli’s soft face. He’d been aiming for his cheek, but the baby yawned again and turned and Fíli hit the little bow of his mouth instead.
Well, that was okay.
As long as Kíli liked it.
The tiny fist tapped Fíli’s nose.
So Fíli decided that he did.