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hoseok should’ve known alice was going to end up being a major pain in his ass.
when he’d performed the spell to be granted his very first familiar - he’d waited until he really thought his life was firmly together and at twenty three, he finally thought he was as close to stability as he could get - he was, admittedly, expecting a large creature, something exotic and exciting. instead, he’d reached inside his cauldron and picked up a long haired dachshund puppy, a little fluffball of rusty orange and ears almost the height of her body.
not exactly exotic but staring into her big brown eyes, hoseok couldn’t find it in himself to be any kind of disappointed.
two years later, hoseok can’t help but muse what would’ve happened if he’d just placed her back into the cauldron and begged for a new familiar. his life would almost definitely be easier - sure, he probably couldn’t fit something like a tiger into his little two floor house but he’s also pretty sure a tiger wouldn’t purposefully drink a spell that’d allow her to breathe underwater and consequently decide to hide in the toilet from a very stressed out hoseok. the pure pride on alice’s face had almost convinced him to flush the chain.
“i’m going insane,” hoseok collapses onto the park bench, watching alice run around in one of the special playground meant for familiars, gate sealed shut by magic, “she literally won’t behave.”
jimin hums, tilting his head as he watches alice steal a squeezy toy mushroom from jeongguk’s familiar, despite the fact that basil the flemish giant rabbit is literally double her height. jimin’s own familiar - a delicate ragdoll cat named sen - is sitting politely upright on jeongguk’s lap, her soft head leaning on the wooden picnic table. hoseok sends a silent prayer up to whoever’s listening that basil is such a gentle rabbit, not retaliating to the dachshund’s childish behaviour, but instead just hopping off to wait at the gate, expectantly.
jeongguk just waves his black wand once, the gate opening to let only basil through. he jumps over to his witch in a few big leaps before jumping up next to hoseok on the bench.
“i thought you got her trained?” jeongguk frowns, undoubtedly remembering the months hoseok dragged alice to familiar behavioural classes. she’d attended the compulsory magic training that all familiars must go to in order to learn the magic they’re born with and how to connect with the witch that owns them. hoseok thinks the fact that alice is so good at magic but won’t cooperate makes things even more frustrating.
“she got kicked out,” hoseok strokes at basil’s long grey ears wistfully, “she kept shitting on the floor then making it invisible just so people would stand in it.”
jeongguk snorts while jimin brings up a bejewelled hand to try and hide his own smirk. sen’s eyes are drawn to the shining silver that adorns her owners fingers. jimin doesn’t even jump when she suddenly reaches out a large, white paw and whacks him with her soft pads.
“maybe alice would listen to me if i wore rings,” hoseok grumbles, crossing his arms. he’s bright in his windbreaker, a jacket with blocks of purple, blue and red but he shivers when a gust of wind attacks at the big rips in his jeans.
“maybe she’d listen to you if you didn’t wear ugly shoes,” jimin giggles as he plays with his fluffy familiar, referencing hoseok’s beloved balenciaga’s. hoseok flips him off. not his fault neither he or his boyfriend can understand real fashion - jeongguk’s constantly head to toe in all black and jimin - well, if hoseok has to be honest, jimin is annoyingly fashionable, especially now with his plaid shirt tucked into tight trousers.
hoseok freezes when he hears a familiar, high pitched, relentless barking accompanied with low, confused noises. the trio turn to see balancing on top of a much larger, stockier dog.
“alice! no,” hoseok jumps up, running towards the fenced familiar park, yelling the entire time for his god forsaken dog to get off right now, fucking hell.
he can hear his awful friends cackling behind him and he can’t resist chucking up another middle finger behind him.
hoseok snaps his fingers, magic filling his fingertips that calls to his familiar, almost impossible for her to ignore. almost. she sits down on the back of the big dog.
“i’m gonna take a guess and say that the creature that’s currently riding my familiar like a horse belongs to you,” a deep voice sounds from right next to hoseok’s ear, making him jump in fright. there’s no-one there. even as a witch himself, hoseok sometimes forgets magic is a real thing. honestly, he barely uses magic. he’s a teaching assistant for young kids who literally can’t use magic yet - or ever, for some.
a quick spin around the open space reveals the witch hoseok’s sure the voice belongs to - he’s waving a hand to hoseok but he doesn’t move any faster than a casual walk, seemingly quite unbothered. hoseok can’t help but think that the large grey sweatshirt the stranger’s drowning in looks really comfy. also that it makes his skinny legs in his ripped black jeans look even skinnier.
with another click of power, hoseok tries again. alice growls at him from her new position. the large dog just looks confused. hoseok can still hear jimin and jeongguk laughing. bastards.
“alice,” hoseok tries to sound firm, “get down. i will not tell you again.”
alice is considerably unconcerned.
the stranger is getting closer and hoseok can’t help but get more frantic, hissing, “alice, get the fuck down. this is not appropriate, get off!”
out of the corner of hoseok’s eye, he sees a pale hand simply gesture ‘down’ once. the big dog sits and alice goes tumbling with a little high pitched yip. the large white and brown dog trots over to the gate, tongue hanging out, the light pink contrasting to the deep black of its head.
with another gesture, the gate opens and the strangers dog greets his owner calmly. alice, however, runs as fast as her small legs can go in order to try and escape through the gate. she can’t and ends up with her head banging against the wall. hoseok can’t help but sigh, using his own hand to allow her to leave. it takes more than one try - he’s better with wands but its lying forgotten in his bag at jimin’s feet.
when alice is finally free, she chucks herself immediately at the other familiar once again, licking at its face and poking it with her nose.
hoseok grimaces, “i’m so sorry,” leaning forward to pick up his protesting dog, easily overpowering her despite how her claws grip tightly into the dirt.
“wow,” the stranger laughs slightly, one hand stroking his dogs large head while the other runs through his own deep blue hair, “she really likes aki, huh?”
alice is struggling in hoseok’s arms, ignoring the calming magic hoseok is trying to radiate. “yeah, sorry, i don’t know what’s got into her,” hoseok tries to spin her around so she can’t see the other dog anymore - aki, he guesses - but the struggling ends up with hoseok holding her with her legs sticking out and her ears dangling down.
hoseok’s about to explode from embarrassment when the stranger laughs and yeah, wow, that is a nice laugh. something in hoseok’s stomach stirs followed quickly by hoseok mentally giving himself a stern no. he absolutely cannot start flirting with this man. even if he really, really wants to.
“i’m hoseok,” he introduces himself with the most charming smile he can, trying to pretend he doesn’t still have a floundering dog in his arms who refuses to stay still.
“yoongi,” hoseok almost melts at yoongi’s name alone, “and this is aki. he’s an american akita.”
the fond look yoongi throws aki makes hoseok almost squeal, “oh, this is alice. sorry, again, by the way, about her.”
yoongi waves a hand dismissively, “it’s fine. aki’s a handsome boy.”
“takes after his owner,” hoseok can’t resist sending an over exaggerated wink, even as his brain is telling him very adamantly not to. yoongi sniggers, simultaneously rolling his eyes but blushing just a bit. hoseok feels almost criminally pleased. there’s something about flustering a handsome man that really makes him happy.
“hoseokie,” a quiet voice appears in the back of hoseok’s mind and it takes a lot for hoseok not to physically react - jeongguk’s hidden talent isn’t one he breaks out very often, makes him too tired - “say you’ll treat him to dinner to make up for it.”
hoseok’s ready to tell jeongguk to get lost but then he thinks for a second and before he knows it, his mouth is open and he’s saying, “let me make it up to you. i’ll buy you dinner? a coffee?”
yoongi’s visibly surprised before a smile that he can’t hide appears on his pouty lips. hoseok has to force his eyes away from them.
“sure,” yoongi says after a second, avoiding eye contact by stroking aki’s big, curled tail, “i have to get going now, though…”
“here,” hoseok manages to hold onto alice with one arm, “i’ll give you my number. just text me when you’re free.” he uses his free hand to gently grab yoongi’s pale hand. it’s a trick he learnt when he was younger, having always forgotten his pen, visible ink spills from hoseok’s fingertip, allowing him to write his number directly onto yoongi’s skin.
“i will,” yoongi smiles again, subtly but the smile’s still there, “c’mon aki, we gotta meet with uncle joon.” aki follows immediately, obediently following at yoongi’s heels without a leash. once they’re far enough away, hoseok pulls alice’s leash out of his back pocket, attaching it to her mint coloured collar, having to almost drag her back to their picnic bench.
jeongguk’s fallen asleep, lying across the bench with his head in jimin’s lap while basil sits tall on his hips, massive ears flicking constantly. jimin’s using sen’s fluffy white tummy as a desk, resting his phone on his familar’s stomach so he can browse with one hand and stroke jeongguk’s hair with the other. it’s an irritatingly sweet sight that hoseok’s almost angry at the perfect couple with their perfect familiars. he allows himself to imagine being in that scenario with yoongi for a split second, sighing happily at the image. he just wishes it could be reality.
instead, alice is running around hoseok’s legs, trying to trip him up on purpose.
“you’re such a shit,” hoseok can’t help but sigh, stumbling over the leash so he can collapse back down onto the wooden bench.
jimin just shushes him, gesturing down to his sleeping boyfriend.
honestly, hoseok wasn’t really expecting yoongi to actually text. he was hoping he would, sure, but he thought there was no chance in real life that his phone would actually light up with a text from a new number but that’s exactly what happens.
on his lunch break in the staffroom, hoseok’s given up on googling ‘how to train your familiar’ and ‘how to stop your familiar from hating your guts and having no respect.’ taehyung’s trying to offer up his own advice but he’s not actually a witch - he just owns a well behaved, normal dog. hoseok thinks they’re considerably nicer than familiars. then again, he is biased ever since he got cursed with the tiny dog from hell.
hoseok’s heart skips a beat when his phone dings with a new text, skipping two more beats when he sees its an unknown number. his heart bursts when he sees the beginning phrase of, “hey, it’s yoongi from the park.”
“if someone you wanna take on a date texts you first,” hoseok asks aloud to taehyung, “how long do you need to wait to reply?”
taehyung frowns, “why would you wait? that’s dumb.”
well. hoseok could probably argue but taehyung sounds so sure that he allows himself to reply immediately, agreeing to the day yoongi suggests without even checking if he’s actually free first. yoongi replies in the next second, making hoseok feel less embarrassed with his own eagerness.
they agree to meet for dinner in the evening in a few days, a nice little place a few streets away from hoseok’s home. that swiftly brings hoseok onto his next issue. alice’s awful behaviour if left alone at night. he cringes just thinking at her sharp nails scratching at his tree stump spell table - it might be a bit extra for someone who barely makes spells but hoseok adores the aesthetic of it. alice adores how it feels to dig her claws into the wood and scrape.
“tae,” hoseok starts, fluttering his eyelashes, “wanna look after alice while i go on a date?”
“no thank you,” taehyung replies immediately, uninterested by hoseok’s mention of a date.
“please,” hoseok begs again, “tae, c’mon, she likes you.” there’s no way anyone else will ever agree - if major dog lover taehyung doesn’t agree to dogsitting, who will?
taehyung sighs, looking up from where he’s editing a picture of his own dog, “fine. you better fall in love and get married if i have to look after the worst behaved dog in the world.”
hoseok melts in relief, leaning over to plant a smooch on taehyung’s cheek, “thank you! oh, tae, thanks. believe me, love and marriage is the plan.”
that seems to be the flame that sparks taehyung’s curiousity. hoseok’s lunch break is consequently spent gushing over yoongi while simultaneously complaining about alice. taehyung finds it hilarious. hoseok’s not sure why he’s surprised at just how loud taehyung cackles.
a simple knock on the front door has hoseok rushing down the stairs, almost tripping as alice speeds down behind him, attempting to overtake her owner. “coming!” hoseok shoo’s alice into the kitchen, shutting the door so she can’t zoom out of the front door.
“tae! hey, come in,” hoseok’s running on adrenaline as he pulls open the front door, waving taehyung in and accidentally shutting the door too hard.
“you look good!” taehyung wolf whistles, checking hoseok out. hoseok’s not conceited but he knows he looks good - ripped, skinny jeans with a black and white turtleneck tucked in. he’s topped it off with a black velvet blazer and ankle boots. casual but cool. that’s hoseok’s goal. he’s definitely got the aesthetic down - but now he’s just gotta have the attitude.
hoseok grabs his bag, yelling out a quick, “bye tae! be good alice!” it’s just a short walk but it feels like forever before hoseok finally arrives at the designated restaurant.
yoongi’s already sitting in there, easy to spot with the flash of blue on his head. he’s speaking rapidly to an annoyingly handsome tall man with broad shoulders who's laughing with his head thrown back before he ruffles yoongi’s hair and walks further down the restaurant, sliding into his own booth.
“hey, yoongi,” hoseok smiles wide, sitting himself down opposite the other witch, “hope that wasn’t a jealous ex here to ruin everything.”
yoongi snorts, taking a sip of his water, “nah, it’s my best friend - seokjin. he’s on his own date.” yoongi’s eyes widen as soon as the last word escapes his mouth. the comical expression of pure shock makes hoseok giggle which just makes yoongi even more flustered.
yoongi manages to pull it together when hoseok teasingly asks, “this is an official date then?”
yoongi shrugs before he makes and keeps stable eye contact with hoseok across the table, “well, it is, right?”
“yeah,” hoseok leans back on his chair, grinning the whole time, “it is.”
the conversation flows easily from then; awkwardness easily stepped over and embarrassing moments easily avoided.
yoongi’s surprisingly funny - his sense of humour is far more deadpan than hoseok’s own but hoseok thinks that makes them click even more. they make each other laugh with completely different jokes. hoseok’s been on dates before, had long term relationships before, but never has he connected with someone so easily. hoseok’s a witch but he’s never felt more magical than now, sitting in a quiet restaurant across from yoongi who’s impersonating the way his dog wrinkles his nose.
yoongi’s friend, seokjin, leaves way before they do with his own date in tow. they stop to say hello (and goodbye) and hoseok had to wonder if everyone yoongi knows is frustratingly beautiful. then again, hoseok himself is friends with jimin and jeongguk so maybe he has no place to talk.
“shit,” yoongi looks at his phone for the first time in a long time and looks genuinely surprised, “it’s super late. i’m surprised we haven’t been kicked out by now.”
it’s only when hoseok actually looks around that he realises they’re the last ones in there, all other tables left deserted.
“do you wanna come back to mine?” hoseok asks before the connotations even cross his mind. he goes to stammer out a pg explanation but yoongi’s just smirking, already laying down notes to pay the bill they’d finally asked for. hoseok genuinely hadn’t even thought of the fact it sounds like he wants to hook up - don’t get him wrong, he really does but he also just wants to listen to yoongi speak for a little (a long) while more.
the walk to hoseok’s small home is a comfortably quiet one. there’s no forcing of conversation or awkward pauses. it’s just…easy. hoseok unlocks his door carefully, barely opening it so alice can’t go running out into the street like she’s prone to do. unsurprisingly, she tries anyway, her little legs running at full speed as taehyung comes skidding behind her, arms outstretched. hoseok pulls yoongi in which means he manages to shut the door just before she escapes. yoongi just looks amused.
“hey, hobi. you’re yoongi, right? i’m taehyung,” taehyung introduces himself to yoongi with a handshake and a tired smile. alice is jumping and yelping at yoongi’s feet, desperate for his attention. “i’m also leaving now because your dog is an adorable nightmare, see you at school hoseokie.” and with that, taehyung flees, making hoseok huff. he’s trying to remake a good impression here, for both him and alice.
alice is enamoured with yoongi so much that she completely ignores both taehyung leaving and hoseok arriving. hoseok can’t lie, he’s shocked. alice just ignores everyone else she’s ever met - she doesn’t even pay attention to hoseok’s family or oldest friends and yet, here she is, licking yoongi’s face. hoseok’s…kind of jealous.
“here, come in properly,” hoseok leads yoongi to the main room with alice following at his heels. hoseok leaves to get yoongi a drink but he comes back at the exact moment that alice decides to launch herself onto the table - a table she knows she’s not allowed to jump on.
yoongi clicks his fingers to control her at the exact same time hoseok does. yoongi hadn’t even noticed hoseok had entered again until they both feel a strong, strange spark flood up their fingers. hoseok gapes, wordless. alice jumps down immediately, protest completely gone.
“it’s - our -,” yoongi laughs in disbelief, “our magic matches. it - it connects.”
“holy fuck,” hoseok puts yoongi’s cup down in front of him in shock, staring wide eyed, “that’s really special, isn’t it?”
yoongi just laughs again in pure disbelief, “it’s a one in a million chance that you meet a witch whose magic syncs with yours. it’s the only thing that brings your magic into full power.” there’s a word yoongi’s avoiding but it’s the only thing in hoseok’s head, looping over and over - soulmates.
hoseok can’t ignore how smug alice looks, her big brown eyes flickering from yoongi to hoseok.
“i guess this was all fate then, huh,” hoseok can’t help but laugh for real, happiness flooding his bones. yoongi joins in, hand finding hoseok’s when hoseok finally sits down again. alice, misbehaving, naughty alice, the familiar from hell, sits herself down politely and quietly at hoseok’s feet.
and then it’s all just - easy. it’s so easy for yoongi to fall perfectly into hoseok’s life, the missing puzzle piece. hoseok hadn’t even realised that his life was missing something until he’d met yoongi - well, he knew it was missing a well behaved familiar but he didn’t realise he was missing his soulmate. but now? now, he’s blessed with both.
“i still can’t believe she wouldn’t respect me until i met yoongi,” hoseok grumbles, watching the way alice trots down the aisle, little flowers on her ears and on her collar, no-one beside her so she looks even smaller.
“shut the fuck up, moron,” jimin hisses from the side, jeongguk trying not to cackle from where he stands basically inside of jimin from how close they are. their familiars sit obediently at their feet.
it’s as hoseok moves his head to glare at jimin that he realised the piano’s started up and there’s - there’s yoongi in his matching suit to hoseok’s and his hair is a healthy black and aki’s walking behind him and he’s - he’s already trying not to cry and that’s the breaking point. hoseok bursts into tears as his soon to be husband makes his way down the aisle, gummy grin growing with every step.
“hey,” yoongi beams as he takes hoseok’s hand in his.
hoseok grins through his flowing tears, “hey. you ready?”
and it’s right as yoongi’s trying to say he’s ready to officially spend the rest of their life together that alice decides to bark loudly, making everyone jump and breaking her years of good behaviour.
yoongi cackles aloud, looks at hoseok’s shocked face and just laughs more, disconnecting their hands so he can laugh with his entire body.
“you know what,” hoseok can’t help but smile, the happiest he’s ever been in his life, “you’re both a pain in my ass.”
(“that’s weird,” seokjin murmurs to namjoon. namjoon makes a quiet, questioning little noise.
“i always thought it was yoongi who bottomed.”)