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Nino hasn't slept much. Last night had been an excited one and he hadn't had one in..... probably forever. Ever since then there had only been lonely nights, crying nights and empty nights.
But last night had been the most exciting in his life. His grandfather had brought him home and even though he was drunk and sleeping, Nino was grateful for the chance. When his grandmother had confirmed him that it was really Ohno Satoshi, the man that had made him want to touch his guitar again, Nino got so excited he couldn't sleep at all.
So after his grandmother had put him in bed in the guest room on second floor, Nino just couldn't help himself from going to see. Ever since then Nino's room had been on the ground floor, so he got out of his room and climbed the stairs carefully. He already knew where the stairs were creaking so he avoided that place even though he knew no one would hear him. His grandmother and grandfather were probably sound asleep by now and Ohno Satoshi was drunk.
He went steadily to the guest room and opened the door just a little and slipped through the crack. He got closer to the bed his heart beating so hard in his chest he thought it would jump out.
He took a deep breath and decided he wouldn't have another chance like this, so he raised his hands and seeked the figure of the man starting from the edge of the bed. He felt his arms under the sheets and then his chest rising and falling in a peaceful rhythm.
Soon his hands found the strong neck and traced up to his face. He touched really softly, his fingers feather-like on the skin of the man, afraid he might wake up.
But he didn't. He continued breathing quietly deep in sleep so Nino had the chance to touch his round cheeks and smooth skin until he committed it to his mind. He then leant closer tempted by a sweet smell bearly there, covered by the smell of alcohol and tobacco. Nino smelt behind his ear and he realized he knew that perfume. His grandfather was a perfumer after all, he couldn't not know it.
But that was last night and now it was morning and their guest had still made no sign of waking up. His grandparents had left early in the morning too and had left him all alone with the man, with no instructions whatsoever. He didn't know what he should do, that's why he decided it was best to no do anything.
But in another hour or so he could hear the stairs creaking and steps around the hall. Nino's heart started beating harder against his frail chest again, making him unable to think properly or even less, take any kind if action. He was suddenly scared and anxious. But a few moments later he could hear the front door ooen and close back. He had left.
I myself let him leave without a word or an explication, Nino thought disappointed in himself. The truth was he had wanted to talk to him to hear his voice, but now it was too late. He would probably never come back, but maybe it was better like this, Nino thought. He's just a poor blind man pitied by everyone isn't he? Nino thought. But he definitely didn't want Ohno's pity. He just liked him too much for that.
~*~*~*~*~*~
Nino's admiration for Ohno had started a few years back when he had been taken to the hospital for check ups by his grandmother. Even though Nino had stopped hoping a long time ago, his grandmother just couldn't, it seemed. Nino would do what she wanted, he owed her that, but he had swore himself he wouldn't make the mistake of hoping ever again.
At that time the depression was eating at his weak mind every day thinking that he doesn't deserve to live anymore, that he has no worth, at that moment the driver switched on the radio in the car and a sweet voice crept to his ears singing about hope in the darkness. Taking even himself by surprise, he asked
"Who's singing? " his grandmother turned her head to him looking really bewildered. She hadn't heard him talking about anything beside that he wants to be alone, in a long time.
"I don't know, dear. I'm sorry. " she replied taking his hand in both of hers.
"Eh, but he's really popular now! " the driver said. "Even my wife and my daughter are talking about him all day and buy his albums. His name is Ohno Satoshi. "
"Oh, thank you very much. We don't really listen to pop music much, we listen more to classic music. " his grandmother explained.
That day, on the way back home his grandmother bought him all of Ohno Satoshi's albums and singles and even though at first he protested saying that he doesn't like his music that much and that it's a waste of money, soon he started asking her to record his tv shows or to buy his live concert dvds. His grandmother was thrilled by the change and the fact that her grandson started talking freely again.
Now they'd watch together Ohno's tv shows and Nino would laugh at whatever stupid thing he'd say and she was happy that Nino had found his smile again. Secretly she also hoped she'd convince Nino to go to one of his concerts one day, it seemed really fun, but Nino was unswayable about going out.
~*~*~*~*~*~
It was sunset time and the hot air of the afternoon was gradually changing to a more breathable, crisp air. Nino could have spent his day in his air condition equipped room just like always, but today after all the commotion and the excitement he kind of felt like spending his day in a soothing environment.
So after having his lunch he just lounged on the porch facing the garden. His grandmother was very proud of her garden even though his grandfather had picked the flowers and plants that had been planted there. His nose was the best after all and knew what plants and what scents with go well with each other. That was why Nino liked spending his afternoons there.
He couldn't see the beauty of the flowers, but he was sensitive to their perfume. His grandfather said he has the nose for perfumes too just like himself, while his grandmother liked to brag that he had inherited her talent for music. Nino enjoyed both, but thought he wouldn't be of worth in any of those paths. He didn't want to waste his life, be a burden for his grandparents, but he thought his life had no worth anymore so it didn't matter anymore.
Just as he was drowning in more self-pitying thoughts, Nino heard the ring of the door bell. So strange, he thought, while his grandparents aren't at home no one ever comes there, there's no reason after all. Maybe it's someone who mistook the address he thought and made no move to open the door. But a moment later he heard the door bell again.
While thinking that this was strange and almost creepy as no one ever came to visit, he stood up and went to the hallway. He felt a little scared and hesitated to open the door thinking that maybe it was a derelict or something, but he knew that their district was one of the best areas and there were no criminals around.
So he thought he was ridiculous and opened the door. But he could hear nothing. Maybe the stranger, whoever it had been had already went away? Nino thought. After all he did take a long time in opening the door. But if anyone was still there it would be embarrassing to close the door in their nose so he waited a little longer not knowing what to do while feeling the last rays of the sun playing on his pale skin.
This whole situation was making Nino anxious and thought he had to do something to end it so in a small voice he asked:
"Yes? " and only then could hear the sound of the steps being taken up to his door. ''This scent ... '' Nino thought not being able to believe his senses.
"I'm.... I've been taken here last night.... '' a sweet voice mumbled and made Nino's lips curl in a smile without his consent or notice.
"Oh, the man from last night. " Nino said raising his head to Ohno. It was a strange reflex move as he couldn't see his face anyway.
"Yeah.... '' the man said and nothing else. Nino thought Ohno must be shy too. It was a strange encounter after all, but he was so excited about it and so happy Ohno had come back that he still couldn't believe it. Then he heard the sound of a plastic bag being moved around.
"You brought something? For me? " Nino asked gesturing to Ohno to come in.
He didn't want to let Ohno leave soon so he guided him to the kitchen that opened to the back garden where Nino had been spending his afternoon just before Ohno had come. He went to the stove and started making tea in an attempt to keep Ohno there for a while and maybe Ohno would talk to him too, he hoped.
But Ohno didn't say anything for a long time and Nino started feeling anxious not knowing what he should do or not. So he just put two mugs on the table and poured the tea and after that, he opened the box of cookies Ohno had brought and munched on one. He sighed smiling happily. It was probably a sign, Nino thought happy. He didn't really believe in such stupid things as superstitions, but how else could he explain that Ohno had brought him the cookies he loved the most. It must surely be a sign, Nino reassured himself.
"My favorites. " he said shily afraid Ohno might think him a strange man for eating cookies with so much gusto. He wasn't a girl after all. But Ohno only laughed and Nino thought that the sound of his laugh is one thousand times more addictive than when hearing it from the tv.
"I'm glad you like them. You have a wonderful house. " Ohno said and Nino congratulated himself for making Ohno keep a conversation. He actually knew the man was quite aloof.
"Thanks. My grandma takes good care of it. " Nino said.
"Your grandma? As I thought. " Ohno said making Nino wonder what he had thought.
"Hmm? " he asked humming while munching on yet another cookie. He didn't want to show himself too interested and also those cookies were divine.
"Oh, my friends asked me what kind of house was the one I woke up in this morning as there was no one home and it was kind of like a mystery. " Ohno tried to explain and Nino chuckled.
"They had to go early in the morning. And I had some things to do. " Nino said lying about the fact that he had been too much of a coward to show his face that morning.
"So can I ask you who you are and if you brought me here last night? " Ohno asked and Nino could feel the hesitation and embarrassment in his voice.
"It wasn't me... '' Nino replied avoiding shamelessly the first question. He didn't know why but it made him uncomfortable to say his name. If this was the first and last time they'd meet Nino wanted to remain a mystery. "My grandpa was with some colleagues from work in that bar and it seems they staid there so late that the barman had to remind them to go home. " Nino chuckled. "And then he saw you sleeping on the counter annoying the barman as you wouldn't wake up. " Nino continued chuckling again, imaging in his mind the funny scene. "So he took a taxi and brought you here. Like that he deflated grandma's fury as well for not coming home earlier. They have gone to Okinawa for a week. " Nino said ending his story.
"I'm Ohno Satoshi, '' Ohno said after a pause that Nino didn't know what to do about. "And I'm glad your grandpa took me home. If a fan or paparazzi saw that I could have gotten in trouble with the agency. " Ohno continued seemingly embarrassed.
Nino understood very well what Ohno was trying to do, but the more the man insisted with self-introductions, the more Nino felt like teasing him by not telling his name. He didn't know why, but he felt like he could play some innocent games with Ohno. He had always been an imp at heart, after all.
"You can come back and tell him that. So you're a celebrity or something? " he asked with the most serene face he could muster pretending he didn't know who was the one sitting in his kitchen right that moment.
"Well, not quite.... '' Ohno replied embarrassed. Nino already knew he was too humble for his own good. If a tv show host told him he had a beautiful voice, Ohno would always deny smiling and looking down in embarrassment. Just thinking about it made Nino smile and bring another cookie to his lips to hide the giddy feeling.
"Drink up your tea or it will get cold, Oh-chan. " he said not being able to restrain his playfulness.
"Ohh, they're good! " Ohno said all of a sudden after he took a cookie making Nino laugh wholeheartedly and say:
"They are, right? That's why they're my favorites. "
The rest of the time they spend it sipping at tea and munching on cookies in complete silence. Nino liked it. It was comfortable silence, but he cou couldn'tstop his heart from beating faster then usual making him skittish only because Ohno was right there in the same room with him. Only thinking that Ohno might gaze at him in that exact moment made his heart skip a beat. He couldn't really explain himself these feelings just yet, but he thought he couldn't feel anything else when the man he admired was just beside himself.
When Nino realized the sun must have set already he stood up to switch on the lights. When he was alone at home, he wouldn't trouble himself with electricity. His world was surrounded by darkness anyway. It would be a waste. But Nino knew that Ohno hadn't yet realized that he was blind. And he didn't plan to tell him anything either. What need was for Ohno to know. He'd just feel bad for Nino, feel pity for him and then run as fast as he could from there. Exactly what Nino didn't want. He just wanted to keep Ohno with him for a few minutes more. Surely it wasn't such a great desire to not have it granted to him, right? And if Ohno decided he wanted to come again sometime, Nino would be even happier.
"It's so late already.... I have to go.... '' Ohno said suddenly breaking Nino from his thoughts.
Probably Ohno was thinking about his own things too, Nino thought, things that maybe didn't involve Nino at all. Trying to not let the sadness show on his face, he just followed Ohno to the front door. He stayed behind Ohno while Ohno put on his shoes listening to the small noises Ohno made with his shoe laces, thinking that the dream had to end now, Ohno would probably go past that door now and never come back again, never remember him again. He tried his hardest though to not show any of his feelings on his face, hoping that he looked as serene as always.
But when the noises stopped and the door hadn't been opened yet, Nino wondered what was Ohno doing. Was he looking at him now, were his feelings showing on his face, maybe? Nino slightly raised his eyebrows apprehensively in a strange childish expression, like when children are afraid to ask something. And then, after he couldn't bear the long moments of silence, Nino asked:
"You'll come again, right? "
"Yeah, I have to come again and thank your grandpa and grandma, don't I? " Ohno chuckled so softly and gently Nino thought he might have seen his sadness through his not so flawless mask.
Nino smiled even though Ohno might have seen through him, he smiled as widely as he could and waved good bye from the door. After all, he had something to look forward too now. Ohno will come back again and make him forget about his problems for an hour or so, making him live in his own dream again.
~*~*~*~*~
Nino had just finished his dinner and was now waiting to get sleepy and go to bed. He had nothing else to do while he was alone.
Well, of course he could read or listen to music anything, but he had never liked to entertain himself like that. While he was alone he liked to just think and be with himself. He could do all the other things while his grandparents were home, for their sake, so that they wouldn't think they had failed him.
But just as he sat on the bed in his room, he heard the doorbell. Twice. Who could it be, Nino thought puzzled and a little alarmed. He couldn't have two gusts two days in a row, or Ohno to visit him two days in a row either, he wasn't that lucky, Nino thought to himself, going slowly to the door. What if it was a murder this time aa he had spent all his luck yesterday when he met Ohno. That was ridiculous, Nino thought smiling to himself.
He unlocked the door and when he cracked the door open he could feel Ohno's scent again, a gush of wind bringing it to his nose and making his smile turn wider, happier.
Ohno entered the house and Nino locked the door behind them. As Ohno walked a few steps in the hallway, Nino could hear the rustle of a plastic bag again.
"You brought me something again? " he asked happily and Ohno handed him the plastic bag.
Nino brought the bag to the kitchen again with Ohno following behind.
"Hagendazs! " Nino exclaimed happily after touching the two small plastic cups of ice cream.
He couldn't mistake that, Nino thought, it was quite a distinct package. He then took some spoons from a cupboard and gave one to Ohno, or better said he put it on the table in front of the chair he heard Ohno pull back.
"So good! " Nino said putting in his mouth a spoonfull of ice cream.
Ohno giggled. "You're such a kid! " he said.
"Umm, so good! " Ohno exclaimed too making Nino laugh and throwing back at him:
"You're such a kid too. "
"That's what Matsujun always tells me, so it must be true after all. " Ohno replied.
"Hmm? Matsujun? " Nino asked intrigued but bothered more by the flavour of his ice-cream he started playing with it.
It had been a bit of a bad luck that he had chosen the chocolate one and Nino was greatly mortified by it, but he had no way of knowing what flavours Ohno bought without eating or asking Ohno and he was determined to keep this charade for a little longer, so that was a no-no, Nino thought to himself while melting the ice-cream with his spoon.
"My producer. " Ohno answered.
"Do you want to switch? " Nino asked suddenly, hesitating a little.
He really didn't think he could put in his mouth another spoonful of ice-cream and feign delight while being disgusted. So after thinking for a while this was the only excuse he could come up with.
"So we can taste both. " he added to make his words more convincing.
"Ok. " Ohno accepted readily. "Oh, but you barely touched yours. I ate more from mine. Sorry. " Ohno said concerned. Such a small thing to be concerned about, Nino thought. This man must be really kind.
"That's ok, I'm full anyway. " Nino said smiling.
"So why are you here so late? Do you intend to spend the night again? " Nino laughed. He was now ready to listen to Ohno's stories; now that he had gotten rid of that chocolate ice-cream.
"Oh, no. I promised mom, I'll go home tonight. It's just that it was really hot today and I was craving an ice cream when I found myself walking back to your house. " Ohno said.
Was this supposed to be a joke Nino thought. How should he react to this he wondered. Even though the words said were somewhat like a joke the tone in which they were said was devoid of any humor. And the fact that he couldn't see Ohno's face made all the more difficult to adopt a reaction.
Now that he was thinking about it, why was Ohno here again, Nino wondered. Was what he said true ot just an excuse? Had Ohno realized he couldn't see and he felt bad for him? Nino couldn't understand anything anymore so he just settled on a small smile and hoped it didn't look like a grimace instead. He also decided to disregard Ohno's words and change the subject.
"Do you want a coffee? " he asked.
"No, thanks. I have to wake up early in the morning, tomorrow so I'd like to sleep well tonight. " Ohno said.
"Then maybe you should go home. " the man replied. "Soon there won't be any trains. "
"I'll just take a taxi. Do you mind if I stay a little longer?" Ohno said with a beseeching tone.
"I don't mind... '' Nino whispered.
Neither of them said anything else for a long time, Nino falling back to his dark thoughts of what if Ohno knew already and even if he didn't know now, what would he do when he found out. Would he get shocked? run away? Throw him some formal words of I'm sorry, that's so sad, you're so young and all the other things people say behind his back and never come back again.
Probably that's how it's going to be, so you shouldn't expect a happy ending for you, Nino talked himself into it like every night. There was no need for him to hope only to be left alone again with a broken heart.
After Ohno left that night, Nino went back to his bed, pulled the covers over his head and cried in his pillow.
It had been a long time since he last cried and it was intense, the tears flowing down wetting the pillow and the sobbing scratching his ears. He was well aware why he was crying even though he preferred to feign ignorance. But they were his own feelings and he knew them best.
He knew how much he still hoped, hoped that someday someone will come and see Nino beyond his blindness, that someone will like him enough to come back, even if just as a friend.
This solitude had been unbearable for the past 20 years and Ohno had showed him just how nice it is to have someone to laugh with. Nino simply didn't know how he'll pretend he's alright all by himself from now on.
~*~*~*~*~
Nino woke up really early the next day, the rays of the sun filtering through his white curtain and the chirping of the birds a faraway song to his ears.
He didn't really feel like getting up, but his eyes hurt and felt crusty from crying last night, so he thought some cold water was necessary.
After splashing some cold water on his red eyes he finally felt better and as he was already up he decided to change and make some breakfast too.
His breakfast was usually only coffee, but his grandmother had left him bread to toast and butter to spread on it, so he made that, ate and realized it must be still early and nothing else to do.
As he was contemplating practicing piano he heard the two rings of the bell. Nino froze.
Ok, so Ohno probably hadn't realized Nino's little secret and had gotten back, but Nino didn't know how to feel about that. Ohno was making him feel things he had burried deep inside and thought were better not brought to daylight again.
Every time Ohno came Nino felt a little more vulnerable, a little more bare to Ohno's eyes and that made him adopt the only measure he knew, avoiding him.
But after a moment of deliberation with himself he stood up and went to the door to open it thinking he couldn't let Ohno out there waiting for him, not in a million years. He was weak to Ohno's silent charms, but he had accepted that already. Last night was proof of that.
But that didn't mean he had to show Ohno all his weaknesses, Nino thought as he unlocked the door. They just stayed there face to face, Nino trying his hardest to protect himself, to guard his expression, to put on an emotionless mask.
Nino really wanted at this moment to be able to see Ohno's expression. Was he confused by Nino's little display of indifference, was he upset, annoyed?
Even so Nino gestured for him to enter and when the door was safely closed Nino asked.
"Why are you here again? " the dryness in his voice was cutting and Nino himself winced at his words.
"I missed you. " Ohno blurted out. It seemed to be spoken carelessly and unadorned. Plain, truthfull words that made Nino frown. That's what disarmed Nino of his indifference, this plain words Ohno seemed to be able to say without getting embarrassed. But Nino wasn't one to fall without a fight.
"Let's try that again, ok? Why are you here? " he again dry and impassive.
Ohno didn't reply for a long moment and Nino started regreting being so indifferent to this man that had only showed him kindness.
"I really wanted to draw you? Can I? " Ohno blurted out then making Nino bewildered. He hadn't expected anything like that and muttered quickly, agitated.
"What? Why? "
"I like your face.... '' Ohno replied again much like he did before, unaffected, unadorned, things that seemed so honest in Nino's ears and made him hope all over again.
"You like my face? " Nino asked half confused, half delighted and laughed. No one had told him that before and so he couldn't restrain the big grin appearing on his face.
"What did you bring? " amused when Ohno rustled the plastic bag.
"Oh, just lunch. Cold noodles. " he said and Nino laughed.
"You intend to stay here the whole day? "
"If you let me? "
"I can't just throw you out now, can I? " Nino laughed. Ohno had this unnerving way of making Nino laugh even when he didn't feel like it.
Nino brought two cups of coffee from the kitchen and put them both on the coffee table in the living room downstairs. He then plopped down on the sofa behind the coffee table, took a cup and started sipping at it. Nino thought that just because Ohno had come didn't mean he had to change his routine.
He liked spending his morning lazily with a cup of coffee and maybe sometimes listening to some CD, if Ohno liked his face and wanted to draw him then he had to do it just like that, because Nino wouldn't pose for him, Nino was thinking to himself with a small smile hidden in his cup of coffee. But when he heard the distinct sound of a pen on paper, Nino brought his face up and asked:
"Are you drawing me? "
"Unn... ' Ohno hummed for an answer. "Hey, do you think you can look down again? " Ohno asked him after a while when Nino finished his coffee and was keeping his head straight ahead.
"Like this? " Nino asked bowing his head down.
"Yeah, thanks. " Ohno said scratching furiously on the paper again.
He told himself he won't pose for Ohno and here he was head a little bowed for Ohno to draw him, Nino thought annoyed.
"Hey... ' Ohno started again.
Nino groaned. "My neck hurts. I can't keep it down anymore. "
"Oh, no it's fine, I'm almost finished. I was just wondering if you'd tell me your name. You never introduced yourself and I don't want to call you hey all the time.''
Nino laughed. Here it comes again, Ohno's attempt at getting his name, Nino thought amused.
"I don't mind! " he said with a lilt to his voice laughing. This game was getting funnier and funnier, Nino thought to himself and wanted to drag it out aa much as he could. He wanted to see Ohno's reaction at being played with.
"What? " Ohno said confused. Nino stood up and went to the music room. He felt like playing the piano that morning, but maybe the guitar would be better, Nino thought to himself with a smirk.
He felt Ohno following behind him and smiled satisfied. It would be fun to play some more, Nino thought while Ohno whined:
"But I mind...It's not fair that you know who I am, but I don't know who you are. " Ohno said stopping behind the Nino who was just opening the door to the music room.
"And who are you again? " the Nino giggled entering the enormous room, a tone of mischief in his voice.
"What's this? " Ohno asked changing the subject. The surprise was quite obvious from his voice, though Nino couldn't deny that the room would make anyone surprised.
"The music room. " Nino replied taking a guitar. He then slumped down on the carpeted floor according his guitar.
"My grandma loves music. She can play the piano like a pro. "
"You too? " Ohno asked sitting down near Nino, close enough that Nino could feel his knee slightly touching his own
"Me too. So you were saying.... ? "
"That I want you to tell me your name... ' Ohno mumbled too while Nino was strumming his guitar
"Why would I? You're the stranger in here who comes to sleep in my house. " Nino said teasingly. He was enjoying bullying and teasing Ohno and liked playing this game.
"That's not quite true. " Ohno mumbled again. "I'm not a stranger, you know who I am, right? I told you before. " Ohno said making Nino want to tease him even more.
"Did you, really? I have no idea. " Nino said smiling.
At first he just stroke the chords of his guitar lazily, but then he started playing one of Ohno's songs that he liked the most. He had planned this from the beginning and now he could barely restrain from laughing out loud.
"You really do know me you lying brat! That's my song! " Ohno said and Nino really burst out laughing.
"I'll tell you who I am if you sing this for me. " Nino said not stopping his stroking.
Ohno sang the song for him and when it was finished Nino put the guitar aside and stood up walking to the door.
Well he had said he'll tell him his name if Ohno sang and he had enjoyed listening to his voice so close, but that was no reason to not keep up to his game for a little longer or maybe for as long as he could get away with it.
At least like this he'll keep Ohno curious and coming back to elucidate the mystery, Nino thought. Unfortunately for him, the mystery was just the gruesome reality, there was no fantasy to be found here.
"Where are you going? " Ohno said waking Nino up from his internal debates.
"It's lunch time. I'm hungry. " Nino said leaving the door open certain that Ohno would follow soon.
Indeed Ohno stood up and followed behind to the kitchen. Nino was unwrapping the two bento boxes and then started making a salad.
"You said you'd tell me your name. " Ohno said in a sulking tone when he got to the kitchen.
Nino laughed and thought that Ohno must be pouting right now and it must be charming, just like his grandmother had told him when they were watching his tv shows.
He put the bowl of salad on the table and invited Ohno to sit and eat with him. They ate in silence with slight interruptions from Ohno exclaiming 'delicious' or 'good' from time to time.
After having lunch Ohno started again to pester the man about his name. The latter only laughed and padded lazily around the house.
Nino kind of liked having his company all day long, he decided and he didn't think he could get back to his solitude filled days ever again.
Now they were lounging around on the porch, Nino had his eyes closed enjoying the afternoon breeze while Ohno sat near him.
"You promised. " Ohno started again.
"I didn't promise. " Nino said laughing.
He didn't think Ohno could be this stubborn, but he enjoyed his nagging, it only made Nino think he was cute and endearing, like a puppy.
"But you said so. I sang, so you have to tell me your name. "
"I lied, so what? " Nino laughed.
"You little brat... ' Ohno mumbled. "I'm never coming back here. " he said and it was obvious that he had said it as a joke, but the words stroke a bad chord in Nino's chest.
It was something he had expected Ohno to say at every moment and if Ohno realized his situation, even more so. Who would want to lose their time on someone like him.
Nino opened his eyes and said in a flat tone.
"My name is Ninomiya Kazunari. Happy now? "
"Are you upset with me? "
"Why should I be? "
"I don't know. You seem upset and I don't know why. You know I'd come back even if you'd tell me not to. After all I haven't thanked your granparents yet. " Ohno said.
Nino understood that Ohno must be confused of his behavior, and trying to appease him, to go back to their peaceful afternoon, but he couldn't help feeling hurt by those words.
"Ninomiya-kun, why is the name plate on your door Yoshida? " Ohno asked and Nino could see he was trying to change the subject, but that was ok, he wanted nothing more than stay in this dream for a little longer.
Nino laughed. "You're an idiot, aren't you? Isn't that obvious? It's because it's my granparents house. My mom, their daughter got married with this Ninomiya guy, my father, so of course I'm Ninomiya too. "
"Ohh, I see. " Ohno replied making Nino giggled.
Ohno was really an airhead, wasn't he, but Nino liked that too. There was nothing he could hate about this man, Nino thought with a heavy heart. It would be so hard for him when Ohno won't come back, but he was ready to risk that for Ohno.
"Hey, Ninomiya-kun, want to go somewhere, in town? " Ohno asked after almost an hour was spent in complete silence, both of them immersed in their own thoughts.
"I can't go out. " Nino said frowning.
"Why not? " Ohno asked.
Nino smiled teasingly, another great, but mischievous idea on his mind.
"I have this skin disease that doesn't let me go out in the sun. " He said.
"You're lying, right? " Ohno asked suspicious. Nino laughed amused.
He didn't want to ruin the tranquil atmosphere of the moment with a heavy confession. Besides Ohno didn't have to know at all.
He won't come here forever, so at least now that he was here it was ok if he didn't know, Nino thought to himself. It was ok for now to play some more and pretend a little more that nothing was wrong. So his next words were full of teasing too.
"Well, if you don't believe me that's your problem, but I can't tell you anything else. I told you too much already. "
Ohno laughed and didn't say anything more, thing that made Nino all the happier. He was a mischievous imp usually, but he had his limits as well and if Ohno nagged him like before, this moment could turn out sour in a beat.
But he was sure of a thing and that was that he couldn't tell Ohno of his impairment. He was too much of a coward for that.
The rest of the afternoon was spent in comfortable silence and when the dark fell they moved inside again. They ate dinner that Nino prepared in silence and then Nino returned to the living room slumping again on the sofa.
Ohno seemed to imitate his every move following him around the house, sitting down at the kitchen table and eating whatever Nino had been cooking and finally slumping down close to him on the sofa their bodies touching everywhere.
Even though, Ohno wasn't an eloquent company his presence only soothed Nino soul of his perpetual loneliness. Now he felt completely at ease, but dreading going back to his lonely days the next day.
"You're really staying all day? Not going home to sleep? " Nino asked wondering how much nore time will he have with Ohno.
"I can't come tomorrow as I have work all day, so I thought I'd spend my whole day off here with you. " Ohno said on a childish innocent tone making Nino smile a little.
"So can I stay the night? " Ohno continued.
"It's not like it would be the first time. At least now you're not drunk. " Ninomiya said smiling happily.
Those words made him really happy. That Ohno would rather spent his whole day with him just because he couldn't visit the next day made him unbelievable happy, even though he knew he'd miss him tomorrow.
In just two days Ohno had managed to crawl his way in Nino's meager existence so well that Nino thought he knew him for a life time, truth be he really knew him from before, even though only from tv shows and magazine interviews. But that was ok, Nino thought, Ohno was here with him now and that was all that matter.
"So what do we do? " Ohno asked excited.
"Nothing. " Nino laughed.
"Can I watch TV at least? " Ohno asked confused.
Nino nodded and Ohno switched on the TV to a fishing show and started telling Nino how much he would like to go fishing, but his manager didn't let him because he'd get more tanned than he already was.
Nino was well familiar with this topic, Ohno seemed to like to tell ot rather often on tv and to lament his short time off. Nino, on the other hand was immensely happy that his manager didn't let him go fishing so he could come here as soon as he got a day off.
Nino laughed at some of Ohno's stories from work and without realizing he let his head fall down in Ohno's lap and fell asleep. It was damn comfortable and he never wanted to wake up again, Nino thought last as he fell asleep on Ohno's lap.
~*~*~*~*~
Nino woke up at the same time he woke up every day, at sunrise, but in a completely different place than he would usually sleep.
He woke up curled up on Ohno's chest on the sofa. It was warm and so comfortable, Nino felt like he had never slept so went before, but he also knew that he shouldn't indulge himself too much in this temporary warmth and blissful feeling.
Soon it will all be over, Nino thought as he stood up carefully and took a blanket from his bedroom to put it gently on Ohno's sleeping form. He then padded slowly and barefoot to the kitchen where he prepared some coffee and then sat at the table thinking about what would come next.
His grandparents would come home tomorrow and if Ohno came to thank them it would be difficult to avoid talking about him. And if it came to that they would surely tell Ohno that he's blind that is if Ohno wouldn't realize it before.
And then Ohno would probably be mad that he had hid the truth from him, or would pity him when hearing about it and then slowly but surely he'll distance himself from Nino, and Nino would just go back to his usual lonely days.
Actually, it's just what was supposed to happen from the beginning, there's just no happy ending for someone like me, Nino thought. But in the next second his dark and angsty thoughts were cut by Ohno's voice. He was probably talking on the phone, more like mumbling, Nino thought, he must be still sleepy.
He didn't hear much, but he understood that probably Ohno had to leave for work. When his voice couldn't be heard anymore Nino realized Ohno must come look for him. Even so he couldn't focus on the sound of Ohno's footsteps, his mind mulling over what to do when his grandparents got home.
Soon he realized Ohno must have found him as there were no more sounds around the house so when Ohno said:
"I have to go. My manager's coming to take me from the station. " Nino kept his blank, impassive face.
"Ok. Don't come tomorrow, please. I have some things to do. " Nino said apathetic.
That was the best he could do for now, stalling to avoid a moment that would come for sure sooner or later.
"Ok. " Ohno said at last. "Then I'll see you again next week.' Ohno said.
"Yeah, see you then. Thanks. " Nino said ignoring Ohno's cheerful tone.
He wasn't in the mood at all and didn't try to hide his reticence to talk. He didn't stood up from the kitchen table and when finally Ohno left he slumped in his chair with his head in his folded arms on the table.
~*~*~*~*~
Nino didn't know what to do with himself the rest of the day. He had spent it all on the porch hearing the birds chirping in the distance, but not listening to anything at all, his mind preoccupied with what to do the next day when his grandparents would come home.
For a while he entertained the idea of asking his grandmother's help. He could tell her everything and probably even convince her thought he's not lying to Ohno, but that it's his own misunderstanding. But for sure his grandmother would see through him.
Would see clearly that he had done nothing to clarify the misunderstanding, because he's craving attention and not pity, craving normalcy.
Then he started thinking that it's better if he didn't do anything, didn't say anything to neither of them. It's not his fault Ohno is an airhead, is it? He hadn't lied about anything after all.
And what if Ohno wouldn't come back, what if he was angry or felt pity, it was bound to happen in the end, Nino thought as he prepared for bed.
It was early, but his mind was tired. He wanted not to think anymore, not to care anymore, but he knew he couldn't lie to himself. He still cared and still hurt as he fell asleep with his face buried in his pillow.
At least he didn't cry himself to sleep again, Nino thought the next morning. He woke up really early, partly because he had slept too early the night before, partly because his grandparents would come back early that day and wanted to be up to greet them.
He did his morning routine quickly and brewed some fresh coffee when his grandmother called to tell him they're in a taxi on the way home.
They arrived home faster then Nino had imagined and then was gone in a flash of hugs, of Kazu, look what I brought you! which were mostly clothes, perfume and fragrances, audiobooks and more clothes, that Nino knew he would never use.
In the end his grandmother let him go to prepare lunch and Nino went back to think about Ohno. Would he come back next week? Or maybe Nino is worried for nothing and he wouldn't even come back.
Either way after he discovers the truth, Ohno will surely end his visits, but that's ok, he has had time to prepare himself for that as he decided last night that he wouldn't say anything to anyone.
What will come, will come, Nino thought as he slumped on the couch strumming his guitar.
At lunch it was a noisy affair as his grandparents were telling him how fun it had been in Okinawa, from time to time bickering about some things or others. Nino only watched them smiling while eating slowly his teriyaki.
Soon he forgot all about Ohno Satoshi as his grandfather took him to try some of his newer perfume creations in his study and then went to practice his piano.
He was so engrossed in his practice that he didn't hear when the doorbell was rang twice one after another.
But then he heard voices from the hallway as he did a small break. His grandmother was talking with someone and Nino knew this voice so very well. He slowly stood up and opened the door of the music room.
The voices could be heard from the kitchen now and Nino made small steps nearing the place, the voices louder in his ears and his heart beating harder in his chest with each small step he took closer. He could hear his grandmother saying:
"Oh, Kazu-kun loves these. "
"So why are you here? "
And then Ohno's voice reply:
"Oh, the first time I wanted to thank your husband for not leaving me sleep in a ditch. But now I just came to see Ninomiya-kun, is he at home? "
"So you met him already, right? "
"Yeah, I'd like to think we became friends... ''
Friends, Nino thought to himself on the verge of tears. This is where their friendship would end though.
He listened further though as he had no courage to go out in the open now.
"Really? That's wonderful! My poor grandson hasn't had any friends since that awful day. "
"What... why? "
"You know, because he's.... ''
And this was where his grandmother would say it out loud, like it was nothing, like Nino's heart wouldn't broke when Ohno would hear that and decide he didn't want to have anything to do with him anymore.
Nino just couldn't stay here and let that happen, he just couldn't be witness to that, so on an impulse he went to the kitchen saying in a broken voice:
"No! Gradma, please don't tell him! "
"Kazu, dear.... '' his grandmother said hugging him.
"He doesn't know? " she asked Nino and he shook his head.
"I think you should talk to him. That's the right thing to do, Kazu. " his grandmother told him soothingly and Nino knew she was right, it was time to tell Ohno what he had been hiding this past week.
He owed Ohno that, who had been nothing but kind, even though after this he wouldn't want to come see him again.
"Yeah, I think it's time to put an end to this. " Nino said steeling himself for what was about to come.
He went out of the kitchen and back to the music room, sure that Ohno would follow him.
Even though they were both there and Nino thought that he had prepared himself for this, it was still so hard to make the words get out of his mouth. And what should he say first? I'm sorry... ? As Nino was still thinking what to say he heard Ohno saying:
"Can I call you Kazu too? "
What a silly question to ask now, Nino thought. Ohno was such a simple man, but he loved that about him Nino realized as a smile threatened to show on his lips.
But it wasn't the time for that now. Ohno had probably just said that because he wanted to lift the heavy mood, but there was no way to get back the easy atmosphere from before, now.
"You do whatever you want anyway. I told you not to come today and you still came'' Nino said upset that he had made this all the harder for him.
"But I wanted to see you. And I couldn't come tomorrow. "
So simple, it was so simple for Ohno, Nino thought mortified. Ohno just came when he wanted to, because he wanted to. Nino was vexed.
"Then just come the day after tomorrow! " Nino said chagrined.
"I couldn't wait that much. I had to see you now. " Ohno said pitifully.
Was there more to his simple mind? Nino wondered.
"Why? "
"If I tell you why, will you tell me what you're hiding? " Ohno said determined.
"But no more lying like last time ok? "Ohno said in a joking tone trying to light up the mood.
There was no way to light up the mood no matter how much Ohno tried Nino thought. But he was right, no more lies, Nino thought as he took a sit on the piano stool and nodded his head. Ohno pulled a chair in front of him and started talking.
"You see, I've had this bad dream in which I came to see you, but the house was in ruins and there was no one here. You were no where to be seen even though, I looked for you everywhere. "
Nino was confused by this story. Was that why he came here now? Because of a bad dream? If he had told him, he missed him or wanted to see him, it still would have made Nino happy, but a bad dream.... ?
"That was all? " he asked.
"Yeah, you can laugh if you want to, but it felt real and dreading.''
"You're really an idiot. " Nino said laughing mirthlessly.
"Now it's your turn. " Ohno said and Nino knew he just had to let it go.
"I'm blind. " he said dully head bowed down. He didn't want Ohno to see his face rright now.
"Kazu-kun, we agreed you wouldn't lie again. " Ohno said and Nino felt at the end of his strength.
"I'm not, I really am blind, I can't see you. " Nino said in a high pitched voice trying with all his might not to scream.
"But... but... ' Ohno stuttered. "You just walk around like....'' Such a simpleton, Nino thought.
"Of course I can walk around normally. I know this house since I was 6. I learned by heart every nook and corner. The carpets are bolted to the floor, there's nothing here that would make me as much as stumble. "
"But you do everything by yourself.... ' Ohno continued and Nino understood that Ohno didn't want to let go either, didn't want this to be real either, hoping that Nino was just lying.
But it just wasn't a lie, it was the crueltruth, a truth that Nino lived for more than 20 years and didn't need Ohno to make it harder for him.
"I'm blind not invalid! " Nino threw back irritated.
"But you knew who I was..... " It seemed Ohno wasn't one to give up so easily, Nino realized and it was a pity he had to shatter his hopes, but this had to end.
"By your voice. And I knew the cookies after I ate them. Also, you didn't realize it, but I knew the ice-cream by it's package. I couldn't know the flavors so I picked the chocolate one. I hate chocolate. " Nino said scrunching his nose in disgust. "But then I made you switch with me. " he smiled sadly. "You seem to be an airhead, right? " he added with a giggle that sounded wrong to his own ears too.
"So that's why you don't go out? " Ohno asked after a short silent pause.
"I hate it outside. People treat you like an invalid, they're talking behind your back, pitying you. Besides, the noises scare me, it's frightening not to know where you're going... ' Ninomiya said remembering the first days after the accident, the voices of the people in the hospital, the scary sounds of the traffic once he was discharged. He couldn't stop two twin tears falling from his eyes at the same time.
All of a sudden Nino felt something touching his hand, someone touching his hand, Ohno's hand so warm on his Nino thought unable to believe Ohno had really touched him, but it felt so strange now after rejecting other people's touch that he couldn't help from jerking away. Unfortunately, Nino realized, he was just scared that Ohno would be just like the others. After all Ohno was people too.
"I'm sorry... can I? " Ohno asked before lightly touching Nino's fingers again
"It's ok... ' Nino said and Ohno squeezed his fingers tightly.
So what was the meaning of this, Nino thought while he felt Ohno's fingers on his skin for the first time. It felt strange and and alien somehow. What was Ohno trying to convey? His pity? His regret? His sympathy?
"So why are you still here? " Nino asked tired of this charade of feelings. "Now you know. You must feel the same pity the others feel when they see me. I understand, so you can just go. "
"You don't understand a thing. I want to stay here with you. I want to see more of Kazu-kun's mischievous smiles and hear more of Kazu-kun playing my songs. " Ohno said in a strong voice immediately pulling Nino in his arms.
Nino didn't know how things ended up like this. He wanted to argue more, to tell Ohno that things couldn't be so simple as he made them, but he was so tired and he wanted so badly to believe in him that he made no move to get out of Ohno's warm, strong arms. He didn't know when he started crying either, but it felt good to just let hus sorrows flow with his tears while Ohno shushed him gently.
"Hey, Kazu-kun, is it ok for me to ask why you can't see? " Ohno asked after some time of talking about small nothings, mostly Ohno promising he'll come everyday, trying to make Nino laugh. And he actually did laugh through his tears, snuggled in Ohno's arms on the floor. It felt heavenly, Nino thought and hoped Ohno wouldn't never let him go again.
"I guess.... I had a car accident with my parents when I was 6. They both died and it seems I hit my head really hard. The doctors said there was nothing wrong with my eyes, but because of the head trauma I won't be able to see for an indefinite period of time, but that it would maybe heal. I took all the medicine they said, but it's been more than 20 years and I'm still blind. " Ninomiya said tears streaming down his cheeks at the memory of the millions of nights he spent praying he'll heal soon. Ohno wiped his tears with the back of his hands and kept him close.
"So now that you know, you'll come again? " Nino asked not quiteable to believe Ohno. .
"I'll come tomorrow. " Ohno said quickly.
"But you said you can't come tomorrow. "
"I had a fishing trip planned, but that can wait. " Ohno said making Nino laugh. He then felt Ohno's chest rise and fall in a sigh. Nino wondered what that meant. Was Ohno disappointed after all?
"Hmm? " he asked hoping Ohno would not be disappointed with the situation.
"I'm happy that after everything we're still here and we can still laugh together. " Ohno said and Nino taken by surprise with such a sweet cheesy line, ducked his head feeling his face getting red.
"Kazu-kun is so cute! " Ohno said suddenly making Nino raise his head quickly in wonder, forgeting that his face must show his flush and embarrassment.
Fortunately in that moment, Ninomiya's grandmother knocked on their door and told them that dinner was ready and they should come quickly before it gets cold. Both of them rushed to their feet a little embarrassed and more than happy to oblige.
~*~*~*~*~
One week later
Ohno and Ninomiya were lazying around on the porch just like always. It was a hot summer so the days they could spend together were spent almost always there.
"Hey, Kazu-kun? " Nino heard Ohno saying and interrupting his flying thoughts.
He was beating a rhythm with his fingers on the wooden floor of the porch, but he was doing it almost unconsciously, a simple habit for him to make music out of noise.
"Hmm? "
"Would you go out with me? " Ohno asked and Nino stiffened visibly. Why would Ohno want to take him out when Nino already told him he hated it outside?
"Please... ' Ohno continued. "I'll take care of you. Trust me, you'll be safe with me. " Ohno pleaded and Nino couldn't just refuse this adorable man, especially if he took care of him.
Nino liked to be taken care of after all, Nino laughed at the image in his head of Ohno taking care of him.
"And where do you want to take me? "
"It's a secret. " Ohno said and Nino couldn't help the smile that appeared on his face.
Ohno was so obvious, Nino thought fond feew a finger touching the corner of his mouth.
"That means you're taking me to the sea. " Nino said laughing taking Ohno's finger in his hand and playing with it.
Ohno laughed too, the sound Nino liked the most lately, more than his singing voice, Nino decided.
"Then tomorrow. " Ohno said and Nino pulled at his finger until Ohno relented his whole hand for him to play with.
He must look like a child right now playing with Ohno's fingers like this, but Nino enjoyed the increasing liberty Ohno gave him to touch.
After Ohno's leave, Nino went inside and to his music room. This moment they shared right now and Ohno's words made Nino hope he can become a normal man and just because of that he wanted to give Ohno something back too.
He sat down in front of his piano, determined to compose Ohno the song he had been nagging him about lately.
The next day Nino woke up too early for his liking. He was too nervous about their outing, anything could happen that would make him panic and that would scare or put Ohno off.
He didn't know if Ohno realized it yet, but he was still a blind man. Even if he could do anything he wanted here perfectly well, outside was another story.
Sighing heavily he went to the bathroom to prepare for the day and then to the kitchen where he poured himself a cup of coffee.
His grandmother had to leave a little earlier so she had probably made the coffee, Nino thought sitting at the kitchen table with his cup of coffee.
After maybe an hour of silence he spent frownig at his coffee, his stomach tightened by the nerves that he only took a sip and then discarded it, he heard the doorbell ring.
He didn't move though, he wanted to postpone the moment as much as possible.
He soon heard his grandfather open the door and laughing. Probably at Ohno and probably because of the cookies he took to bring every time.
If he ate more than this, he'll probably develop intolerance to them Nino thought to himself wrily.
"More cookies? " Nino asked the question he heard his grandfather say only to embarrass Ohno more.
"You have to tell me what else you like. Your grandpa embarrassed me just now for buying a stock of them. " Ohno said pitiful making Nino laugh a little. But then his nerves came back tenfold and went back to frowning.
"Are you worried? I promise I'll take good care of you. " Ohno said. Probably his expression was really obvious, but Nino couldn't help not worry.
"It's not you I don't trust, but the other people. " Ninomiya said.
"Oh, you don't have to worry about that. There aren't many people where I'm going to take you. "
"Really? " Nino asked a little relieved and happy to feel Ohno hand taking his.
"Yeah, as a celebrity I can't go out carelessly in the middle of the masses, you know. So I'm taking you to a private spot Matsumoto told me about. "
Nino supposed Ohno had said that to make him laugh and succeeded, finding his haughty tone really funny.
"You're not even that popular. " Nino laughed teasing him.
"Well, but you knew me... '' Ohno said making nq blush.
"Are you ready? " Ohno asked pulling on Nino's hand.
He groaned feigning to be displeased, but actually being happy for Ohno fawning over him like that.
Ohno called for a taxi to drive them to his 'private' beach in Chiba, Ubara beach.
It was indeed a little secluded and there were no people.
"So just like I thought, the beach huh? " Nino said and Ohno giggled.
"Yeah..... ''
Then Nino felt Ohno undoing his shoelaces and attempting to take of his shoes. Nino groaned displeased, he didn't really like sand on his skin, but if Ohno wanted him to feel then he accepted in the end.
But when Ohno pushed him gently down making him squeal Nino glowered at him. It seems though that it had no effect on Ohno anymore, he must have gotten to knowq him a little too well, Nino thought.
"Better now. " Ohno said sighing happily.
Nino was still a little moody, though, a little frustrated at thw situation. If Ohno had come here with anyone else, he could have played right now, or share impressions about how beautiful it was. With him Ohno can't do anything beaide stay on the towel.
"Don't you like it, Kazu-kun? The way the sun warms your skin and the breeze blows through your hair? " Ohno said pushing back a strand of hair from Nino's face taking Nino by surprise.
He hadn't thought about it like that. Even if he can't see the landscape, he can still feel the nature around them and appreciate it more than people who can see.
"Besides, there's no one here, just me and you and the sound of the waves. " Ohno continued when Ninomiya just mummbled his assent.
"Also, I brought you something. " Ohno added and put the hagendazs ice-cream in Nino's hand.
"You should bring real food next time. " Nino said a little grumpy but uncapped his ice-cream and started scooping spoonfuls into his mouth.
"Unn, vanilla! " Nino moaned in pleasure.
"I asked your grandma what flavor you like. " Ohno said.
After they ate their ice-creams bickering like kids over their favorite flavors, they soon fell in complete silence, a normal phase for them.
"Thank you. " Nino said after long moments of tranquility. "I haven't been anywhere, except the hospital since I was a child. " he said and Ohno took his hand and squeezing his fingers making Nino compelled to continue.
"It's nice here. I can feel the nature around us and I can imagine there's just us, the beach, the sea and the sky. No people, no problems. "
"It's just like you imagine it Kazu-kun. Here it's just you and me. The sand... ' Ohno said pulling Nino to his feet and prompting him to walk.
"The sea... ' Ohno said when they reached the spot where the waves rolled on the beach, sweeping by their legs.
"And the breeze. " Ohno said again pulling Nino's hand and making him run along.
"I can't anymore! " Nino screamed gasping for air, while Ohno was laughing and pulling him forward. In the end they both fell in a heap, laughing.
"It's been a while since I last ran. " Ninom said defending his lack of breath.
"I think it's time to go home. " Nino said when the afternoon sun became unbearably hot on his skin.
He knew his pale skin would burn fron overexposure and wanted to avoid that.
Ohno hummed and started picking up their things and tidying the place.
"Ne, Kazu-kun... ' Ohno started shily.
"Would you like to go out with me again.... like... you know.... ' Ohno stuttered.
When no other sound came out of Ohno's voice, Nino frowned. He wondered what was Ohno trying to tell him that was so hard to say out loud.
"Why are you shy all of a sudden? I liked it today. Maybe we could come again. " Ninos miled thinking that it will prompt Ohno to go ahead. Instead Ohno just mumbled some more.
"But.... I mean... what I want... ' Nino sighed hard so that Ohno would hear him.
"Just tell me, ok. I can accept more than you think. " Nino giggled.
"Really? Can you accept that I want to date you? " Ohno asked grave.
Nino couldn't deny he wasn't expecting that, but it wasn't something unpleasant for him at all. If Ohno wanted to date him then all the better, because Nino thought, he could have never confess to Ohno himself.
Then he smirked and reached his hand out for Ohno to take, which Ohno squeezed immediately.
"I guess I can. I've liked you for longer than you know me, so I guess I can accept you dating me. "
Nino knew Ohno must be surprised and maybe confused, he hadn't told Ohno anything about how he got to know him before meeting him after all, but he didn't want to tell him right now, right here. So he pulled on Ohno's hand to take him home.
"Tell me! " Ohno pleaded for the nth time on their way home. Once they got out of the taxi, Ohno pulled him quickly in the music room and stood with his back on the door.
"I'm not letting you go, until you tell me everything. " Ohno said making Nino feel shy all of a sudden.
"It's not much to tell. You already know I knew you from before. I heard you singing on radio one day when I went to the hospital for a check up and since then I asked my grandma to buy your albums for me. I thought you have the most beautiful voice I have ever heard... on radio. " Nino giggled.
Even though telling this story made him shy he still wanted to tease Ohno a little, and Ohno hit his shoulder in retaliation.
"Sorry, sorry... ' Ninosaid and continued.
"And then when grandpa brought you home drunk, at first I didn't believe him when he said it's you. Grandpa doesn't really listen to music nor watches tv, but grandma said it really was you so I believed her in the end. That night I went to the room where you were sleeping and touched your face. I thought I'd never have the chance and I really wanted to know how you look like. You have chubby cheeks and a small round face....I thought you're cute, you must be popular. " Nino said feeling his face getting hot at remembering that night.
"Not really. " Ohno replied leaning forward and putting a chaste kiss on Nino's lips. "But if Kazu-kun thinks I'm cute it's more than enough for me. "
It had all been so fast Nino hadn't even had the time to process the touch, nor to enjoy it. Did this airhead know that it had been Nino first kiss? How could he make it this casually? But maybe it had been better, otherwise it would have made him feel too self conscious, Nino thought.
"You're cute too, Kazu-kun and I like you a lot. " Ohno said meanwhile and Nino knew there was no way he wouldn't feel self conscious or embarrassed with Ohno saying these things to someone like him with no romantic experience.
Nino just didn't know what to say or what to do, feeling flustered and shy before Ohno, but soon he felt Ohno pulling him into his arms and hugging him tightly.
It felt so nice to be in Ohno's arms like this surrounded by his smell and warmth and really wanted to show Ohno how much he appreciated and liked him so he slowly and clumsy raised his arms and put them around Ohno's frame too.
He didn't know if this is love or not, but for now he just wanted to show Ohno how much he needed him and how much he appreciated all he had done for him until now.
And if Ohno would someday say ''I love you'' instead of ''I like you'' Nino would be more than happy to respond to his feelings.
Nino then pulled apart and took Ohno's hand intertwining their fingers together.
"Hungry? Sleepy? " he asked leading Ohno to the kitchen.
"Both! " Ohno laughed squeezing Nino's fingers. "Cook dinner for me? " he asked.
Nino's grandparents had gone out to eat with some friends, so they were by themselves, like their first days together.
But Nino didn't need to pretend or to hide anything, Ohno liked him the way he was and that thought only made him feel light like a feather and so content and peaceful as he had never been before.
"Stay the night again? " Nino asked starting already to boil the pasta. There was no answer, but the kiss he was given on his cheek made Nino happier than any words o could have said.
The end