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You woke up that morning with a strange feeling. Somewhere between excited and terrified, which you did sometimes feel after having a crazy dream. It took a few moments, but your mind began to replay the image:
There was you, and Spencer…kissing? Your stomach did a flip, and you felt your face flush. You were aware that you had a small crush on her, and she was very pretty, but began to wonder if maybe these feelings were more deeply rooted than you thought.
You tried to shake it off, and went downstairs for coffee, which you smelled upon opening your bedroom door. Emily had stayed over, and she almost always woke before you did.
“Morning sleepy head!” She called to you, bringing two fresh cups to the couch.
“Thanks Em…hey, can I ask you about something?”
“Sure, what’s up?”
“Well…I-I had this dream last night, and I’m not sure if it means more than just a silly dream.” Emily paused for a moment, a small smile on her face.
“Waaas… it about Spencer?” You felt your cheeks grow hot at the mention of her name.
“How did you know that?” You were almost frightened to find out. Was it that obvious how you felt about her?
“You said her name in your sleep. A couple times.” Emily shrugged. In your head, you couldn’t understand why she was being so calm about this. It was driving you crazy!
“Um, yeah…we were kissing? And sometimes, while I’m awake I mean, I…think about her…” You weren’t entirely sure how to explain it.
“Trust me, I get it. I used to get the same way about Ali, before I even knew I was gay.”
“But I-” You quickly interrupted.
“Relax, it doesn’t mean you are, it’s okay to have a crush on a girl sometimes. It only has to mean something if you want it too.” Emily’s words were calming. You weren’t sure about labels, but you did know that being around Spencer made you feel the good kind of fuzzy inside, and until now you never thought twice about it.
“Oh, by the way, I invited her over.” Emily’s gentle expression turned into one of sly deviance.
“You did WHAT?” Emily laughed at your adorable panic. Right on schedule, Spencer’s car pulled in.
“I thought I’d do you a favor. You were dying to see her in your sleep, you know!” You shot a good-natured death stare at Emily, and quickly pulled yourself together. When Spencer walked in, you shot up to your feet.
“Hey guys! Ooh, coffee!” Typical Spence, straight for the caffeine. “So what are you guys up to today?” Ah, a simple question. Yet, your mouth forgot how to make words.
“Uh, we were, just…going to…”
“We were gonna grab lunch, thought you’d want to come?” Emily, always there to save your skin.
Spencer nodded, her cheeks bulging with a mouthful of coffee. You made brief eye contact that suddenly made you feel under dressed, standing there in a thin tank-top and sweat pants.
“Uh, I’m gonna go change!” You announced, and ran up the stairs a bit too quickly, almost tripping on a step.
Spencer grinned at Emily, “Is she okay? Why is (Y/N) so jumpy?” Emily tried as best she could to contain her laughter.
“She had a weird dream last night, shook her up a bit.” Spencer looked concerned concerned enough to set down her coffee cup.
“Aw, is she having nightmares? I knew telling her about all this A business would shake her up, but I could tell she started feeling left out when we’d all get together. She needed to know.” Emily nodded along.
“I agree, but it’s…not that.”
“What is it?”
“I’m sure you’ll be able to find out.” Emily winked to end their little talk as you came back down the stairs. Spencer had no idea what was going on, but hoped you were feeling okay.
“I’m going to do my hair before we go,” Emily said, exaggerating each word and looking at you like she had a plan. Your eyes pleaded for her not to leave you and Spencer alone, but of course this only encouraged her.
It was silent for a moment when Em left the room, and you tried not to look too stiff in your own home.
Spencer spoke first, to your relief. “Hey, Emily told me you had a dream last night-”
“She did? What did she say?” Your heart began to pound in your ears.
“She just said that’s why you were acting so jumpy, that’s all. Do you want to talk about it?” You shook your head and Spencer went on talking about how she’s had mornings like that too, but it’s best to shake it off. You didn’t hear a word she was saying, though.
“Spencer?”
“Yeah, (Y/N), what’s wrong?” You sighed and plopped onto the couch, Spencer followed. Face in your hands, you began to explain.
“I had a dream about someone and we kissed, and now I just feel…weird.” A partial admission was not a lie. Spencer smiled and patted your leg.
“I’ve had dreams like that too! Once I dreamt that I kissed Lucas! How weird is that? But it was only a dream, it doesn’t mean anything real.”
“But what if it does?” You looked Spencer dead in the eye, your complete seriousness making her even more worried. She set her cup down on the coffee table.
“(Y/N), hey, what is this about? You can tell me.” You were mixed with nerves and humiliation yet the stupid fuzzy feeling wouldn’t go away, and you just wanted to smile at her. Instead you stared into your lap.
“It- the- the dream was…” deep breath, “it was about you…” now the tips of your ears grew hot and you didn’t dare look at her expression. “I understand if you think it’s weird or gross, but I do have a bit of a crush on you, I have for a while now and I’m so sorry if this makes you feel different around me, or like you don’t want to-”
“Hey, hey now, come here…” Spencer wrapped her arms around you in a comforting hug, and rocked you slightly. She was like a mother to everyone she cared about. “I think that’s very sweet, and I’m glad you told me. I don’t want you to feel weird around me, keeping that to yourself.” You pulled away, still afraid to look her in the eye.
“There’s something I need to tell you, too, but first you have to look at me…” you couldn’t refuse, especially when she asked in such a gentle tone. You melted when she did that.
Spencer’s eyes were soft, and her hand was placed against your cheek. She smiled at you, the way that you loved, and just when you thought you were dreaming again, she leaned in and gave you the softest and most loving kiss you’d ever had.
Your smile spread from ear to ear.
“S-Spence…I…”
“Shh, it’s okay. Now come on, I’m starving!” She jumped from the couch, holding your hand in hers. You did’t know what this meant for the two of you, but if Spencer was going to treat you like this from now on, you didn’t care.
Emily hung in the stairway, watching the whole thing. She had a proud grin on her face the rest of the day for having such a brilliant plan.