Chapter Text
“So let's find a bar
So dark we forget who we are
But all the scars from the nevers and maybes die”
- Rent (2005)
Seongwu doesn’t remember how they got there. He remembers agreeing to tag along Jisung and Hyunbin to this new joint in Hongdae. He doesn’t remember agreeing to crash a Halloween party at a semi-exclusive club in Itaewon. He doesn’t even want to know how they got in.
He admits that he does like to party every now and then. But hangovers don’t exactly help pay the bills, so he gradually shifted to a lifestyle of less partying. But this week has really been extra draining to him, mentally and physically. His dad chose the wrong week to move some of their old things—photo albums, old tapes, tattered sepia photos enclosed in broken picture frames—to the storage room of their vintage video rental shop in Dongdaemun.
Seongwu doesn’t even question whether they’re still making money from the rental shop. He doubts that anybody would even come to their shop looking for copies of old films, anyways. But he never comments on it, opting to respect the rental shop’s faded burgundy walls, and the bittersweet sentiment they bring.
Sometimes, people would want to find things. I want to be one of those people they can come to to find those things, his old man would say.
Seongwu wonders briefly what his dad would say when he finds out how his son is spending his Friday night. Seongwu badly needs to let out some steam so there’s really no better way than to drink his worries away, even just for a night.
Everyone in the club, including Jisung and Hyunbin, is wearing masks to conceal their identities.
Everyone except Seongwu.
He went for the police officer look because he saw a police hat on his cabinet, which he must have brought home by mistake on one of the many Halloween parties he went to, back when he was in college. Nobody seemed to care that he didn’t wear a mask. It might have been due to the fact that everyone was already shitfaced or that they simply didn’t care.
Regardless, Seongwu likes the thrill.
He likes the thrill in having to dance with strangers who he may or may not ever have the chance of seeing again. He kind of regrets not having a mask to conceal his identity, but right now, in the middle of the swaying bodies and blaring EDM blasting from the club’s speakers, he’s satisfied.
He doesn’t remember how many drinks he’s had for him to end up in the middle of the crowd, half-popping, half-grinding his way to euphoria. He trusts that Jisung and Hyunbin are not as drunk as him. He trusts Jisung, at least.
The music switches to something with a deeper bass, something infectious, something sensual.
He’s starting to drown deeper, getting lost in the sensation of being surrounded with strangers who are as drunk as him.
That’s when his drunk self stumbles on his feet and almost collides with a person, a stranger who immediately holds him by his wrists, avoiding any possible fall. Seongwu wants to laugh at himself for almost falling flat on his gorgeous face, but he resists, reveling in the firmness of the grip on the stranger’s wrists.
When Seongwu looks up, it feels like he’s seeing double at first, until it dawns on him that the person, the guy that caught him is actually talking to him. He sees the guy’s lips move, but Seongwu can’t really hear him, entranced by those lips moving in slow motion.
The guy notices this and inches forward, his grip on Seongwu’s wrists becoming slightly firmer. “I said, you should be more careful next time, officer.”
Seongwu blinks slower and tries to focus on the guy’s face, which seems to be smiling at him. The man, too, was wearing a mask like everyone else. Seongwu wants to comment on how the masked stranger hasn’t taken his hands off him yet, but instead he slurs, “I’m off-duty.”
Masked stranger laughs at that. The mask only covers the guy’s eyes, and yet Seongwu feels like he could almost picture the stranger’s eyes crinkling to match the smooth, easy laughter. That’s when he notices that the masked stranger is about a head taller than him. Seongwu frowns; he’s already taller than the average guy, and he doesn’t really like the thought that there are other people who can make him feel smaller.
“You’re not so bad yourself, you know,” comments the stranger.
Seongwu wants to protest because apparently, said stranger can read his mind.
“No, I can’t. You’re just thinking things out loud right now.” Seongwu is too mesmerized by the giddy tone in the stranger’s voice, too caught up in the almost non-existent space between them.
Suddenly, everything feels hotter.
The stranger’s soft grip on his wrists, bordering on soft caresses, burns on his skin. But again, Seongwu makes no move of breaking free and instead tries to move closer to the stranger, seeking his warmth. He wraps his hands around the stranger’s neck and finds those masked eyes grow darker, hungrier, needier. He turns to look at the stranger’s lips, and fuck , was it a wrong idea.
“I’m really… really drunk right now,” Seongwu slurs, but he hopes the stranger is still hearing him out. He’s looking at the stranger’s lips as he tries to put his thoughts into coherent sentences. The stranger’s lips are so pretty, and Seongwu just wants to find out if they taste as good as they look.
“Permission to kiss a drunk officer?” whispers the stranger.
Seongwu nods absentmindedly, too fixated on the stranger’s breath tickling his neck.
He has no idea who closes the gap first, but soon, he’s met with a seemingly not-so-experienced pair of lips. But the effort makes up for the slight sloppiness. And besides, Seongwu has always been a generous kisser. So he kisses back with equal fervor and a bit more control. He grabs hold of the stranger’s soft blonde locks and moans wantonly onto the stranger’s mouth.
The kiss gets better, deeper, and hotter. Suddenly, he just wants to take all of this somewhere else.
Seongwu pulls back, and he feels the frown forming on the stranger’s lips still dangling a few inches from his. How cute , he thinks.
“This is cute, but do you want to take this somewhere else?” Seongwu enunciates his words carefully, giving the stranger a chance to retreat.
“Uhm, can we go to your place?”
Something in Seongwu instantly softens at the stranger’s tone. He takes the stranger’s hand in his and tries to lead them out of the throng of bodies on the dance floor. As the cold midnight air hits his skin, he feels the stranger’s fingers intertwine with his. On instinct, he huddles closer and leans his head on the stranger’s shoulder.
The stranger never lets go until they hail a cab. Everything passes by in a blur. Seongwu is a giggling mess, and he finds himself constantly playing with the fingers of the equally giggly stranger.
Once they arrive at his house, he struggles with his keys but eventually manages to make them work after a couple of tries. Seongwu can’t even remember how they manage to climb upstairs to his room, but once his back hits the wall of his bedroom and feels eager lips on his neck, he thinks that his Friday night wasn’t so bad after all.
He misses the part where the stranger takes off his mask. In the morning, Seongwu will only remember how his breath’s just taken away but right now, he reaches out to touch the stranger’s face, tracing his eyes, his cheeks, his lips. The stranger responds by kissing his hand, trailing kisses along his arm, leading up to a kiss to his neck. The stranger’s kisses are soft and deliberate, and Seongwu is left reeling, reveling in everything that the stranger is giving him.
And as he lies on his bed, stripped of all his clothes with the stranger taking off his own set of clothes, Seongwu stops thinking. He can turn his mind on again tomorrow. For tonight, as he feels hands and lips all over him, he succumbs to bliss.
Seongwu’s head throbs.
He has the vaguest of ideas why they’re having breakfast at 8 am, when he could still be sleeping away his hangover from the night prior. He can barely keep up with the energy of his older sister, who is going and on and on about a possible funding that their upcoming exhibit might be receiving.
Wow. If he managed to catch that, perhaps he isn’t too hung over after all.
“Earth to Seongwu! Can you function like a normal adult for a moment and actually answer me?”
Jinah slides the cinnamon tea in Seongwu’s direction, the scent of it filling his nose just enough to give way to a calming sensation. Exactly what he needs after a very wild Friday night.
“Now are you here with us?” Jinah jokingly points her teaspoon to his direction. “Dad and I were just talking about rules on, well, the people you take home with you. More so, the people you take with you to your bed!”
Seongwu’s dad lets out a laugh while sipping his own cup of coffee.
His older sister has always been this straightforward. Seongwu guesses it must really run in the family.
Two can play the straightforward game.
“This isn’t the first time I brought people home without warning, though?” Seongwu challenges.
His sister scoffs.
Their dad keeps on reading the paper as if his two children aren’t casually talking about his son’s bedroom activities.
“I’m saying a heads up would have been nice?” Jinah says. “Like, ‘Hello sister dearest, I’m at a party right now and I might be taking a guy back with me and may sleep with him?’”
Seongwu laughs. His sister can be unbelievable sometimes.
Jinah continues,“You should have seen him! Poor guy was so ashamed to have his face seen and just kept bowing, mumbling apologies to me when he almost bumped into me earlier.”
“Maybe you scared him. Frankly, I wouldn’t be surprised.”
There’s a look of disbelief on his sister’s face. Their dad keeps letting out giggles from behind the paper he’s reading.
“Besides, what do you expect him to do?” Seongwu adds. “Stay over for breakfast?”
“Well, you could have at least offered. That would have been the gentleman thing to do.”
“I didn’t even bat an eyelash when he got up from my bed. What happens on Friday night stays on Friday night, people included.”
“Even if they’re, say, a centimeter taller than you and has broader shoulders than you?”
Seongwu almost chokes on his tea. “That’s not fair.”
“What’s not fair is you not talking about how nice he was in bed,” Jinah says.
Their dad coughs, gets up with his cup and places it on the sink.
“Spill.” Jinah inches closer from her side of the table, waggling her eyebrows.
“Let’s just say I won’t be walking straight for the next few days,” Seongwu says.
His sister gives him an approving smile.
Seongwu smiles to himself, mind wandering to thoughts of soft caresses and shy, smiling eyes.
Seongwu hates Mondays.
He dreads showing up at the office, knowing full well that a pile of work is waiting for him. He’s back to churning out trailer after trailer in between attending occasional meetings with the demanding and snotty producers. He misses the weekend already.
“Hey did you hear?” Gunhee from Marketing asks.
“Hear what? The day just started.”
Gunhee sips from his coffee and huddles a seat closer to Seongwu. It’s not even his seat. It’s Dalja’s.
Dalja has been working in the agency for as long as Seongwu remembers. She has always been extremely chatty with him and with everyone in general. Seongwu just learned to go with the flow, since some of her stories do seem pretty interesting. Her spiels somehow serve as helpful distraction from when he’s finishing deadline after deadline.
While Dalja works on trailers for romances and romantic comedies, Seongwu powers through massive slews of trailers for horror flicks and psychological thrillers. Everyone in the office thinks they’re an unlikely pair, and yet, Seongwu likes to think otherwise.
“Dalja has found true love,” Gunhee says.
“What?” Seongwu says. “Then we should congratulate her? Right?”
“Well it turns out true love wants to take her on a trip around the world.”
“Wait isn’t that an even better news? Where is she anyways? I should congratulate her.”
“She’s with Boss,” Gunhee reveals.
Seongwu waits for the catch.
“She’s resigning effective today,” Gunhee explains. “She’s saying something about living in the moment and following her heart.”
It takes a while for his brain to catch up to that, but then it all clicks.
“Are we hiring another person who will cover her workload?” Seongwu exclaims.
Gunhee gives him a shrug and gets up, walks away, presumably back to his side of the office, as if he didn’t just drop a bomb.
Seongwu really hates Mondays.
“I can’t believe you didn’t tell me. Me, of all people here in the office?” Seongwu’s got a stapler in his hand and proceeds to threaten Dalja with it.
“Sorry Seongwu-ah,” Dalja says. “I still can’t believe I’m going through with this.”
“Yeah, it’s pretty bold of you to do so. You could have just requested for an extended leave or something. So you know, you’ll still have an actual work waiting for you when you get back from your tour around the world.”
Seongwu continues on and assumes Dalja’s still listening,“Where do you plan to get work when you come back?”
Dalja shakes her head. “I actually have no idea yet but Hyunwoo started helping me with my portfolio. He says I have enough material to try and work for a tv station or something.”
“Ah, so that’s the fella’s name.”
Throughout to he whole time Dalja is emptying her drawers, she keeps this vibrant smile on her face. Dalja has always been a cheerful presence in the office, but today she has been extra smiley.
True love must really be working wonders for her.
“Actually, yes,” Dalja says to him, face practically beaming.
“Crap,” Seongwu mutters. “I gotta stop speaking my mind out loud.”
Dalja laughs as she closes the last of her boxes. “I really didn’t mean to dump my pending deadlines on you. If it makes you feel any better, the producers for my deadlines are all really nice ones, all nice enough to treat me to a latte or two.”
“I don’t know if any amount of latte can help me survive the wild, wild world of romantic comedies.”
“Sure it will! And you’ll never know if someone will come waltzing in your life and sweep you of your feet,” she says as she gives Seongwu a pat on his shoulder. “Then you’ll end up breezing through all the deadlines, even the really sappy ones, because you’re just that in love,” she finishes, hand squeezing Seongwu’s shoulder before retreating.
“Is that what happened to you?” he asks her genuinely.
She nods once—and really, that says it all.
“Oh, before I almost forget, here’s the folder of my pending projects.” She places a long brown folder with different colored-flags on his desk. “I have the summaries printed out and even the notes from the producers on what they want to see on the final product.”
“Is there any chance there might be some sort of footage in here that ends in murder or something?”
Dalja laughs. “See you around, Seongwu-ssi!”
Dalja extends her hand out for a handshake, but Seongwu’s in a sappy mood. So he stands up from his chair and gives Dalja a weak hug.
“Ah, how good must it be to be young and in love,” Seongwu says.
“You’re halfway there, you know? You just need to work on the in love part.”
It’s Seongwu’s turn to laugh. The anxiety of his additional deadlines are starting to creep in, and yet, as he bids his co-worker goodbye, he can’t help but feel happy for her.
He wonders if it will ever be the same case for him.
“So I guess we’ll be hearing from you, say, next week?”
“After you send me the footage of course.”
“Yes, of course.”
Seongwu seals it with a firm handshake. He’s still working on the pending deadlines Dalja left behind, but their Boss insists he meet the producer, since this is a big budget romcom that will span two more installments within the next three to five years. He’s surprised that even romance films are into the whole trilogy thing.
“As long as we stay right under CJ & EM’s nose, we’ll always have blockbuster offers from them” is what their Boss would say.
He wonders if he’ll get a bit of a raise, with his workload somehow doubling. He could call his Boss right now, inform him of the result of the meeting and casually ask about a possible raise, but then his Boss would know that the meeting already ended.
He spots the restroom in the far corner of the floor and decides he doesn’t want to go back to the office just yet.
He remembers asking security earlier at the first floor, and them answering that guests are discouraged from using restrooms apart from the ones meant for guests, a.k.a. those at the first and second floors. He’s currently at the sixth floor, and is in the mood to break some rules.
Upon entering the room, he hears a knock from one of the cubicles. He doesn’t dare speak and instead walks slowly towards the sinks.
“Hello, is anybody there?” a voice says.
Seongwu stays silent, hoping that turning on the faucet won’t make any sound.
“I can tell you’re hesitating to open the faucet in case I hear you.”
Damn , Seongwu thinks and coughs before responding, “Yes, I can hear you. Do you need help?”
“This is really embarrassing, but would you mind handing me some tissue from over there?”
Seongwu obliges and takes a hefty roll of tissue paper from beside the sink and gives it through the gap below the cubicle door and the floor. As soon as he hears the toilet flushing, he goes to the other cubicle to do his business.
No way is he going to get caught simply because he chose to use the urinal over the toilet. He doesn’t plan on getting caught breaking the simple restroom rule for guests.
“Hey, thank you. I owe you one,” the stranger says.
“No problem, dude.”
“I’m going now.”
Seongwu doesn’t understand why Restroom Guy needs to announce his leave. Once he hears the door closing, he steps out of the cubicle. To his surprise, the guy is still here and is about to take more tissue paper.
“I forgot the hand dryer’s not working,” the man says.
Seongwu really doesn’t understand why Restroom Guy is too chatty with him. He pays the guy no mind and turns on the faucet on the farthest right to avoid further contact and conversation.
“Hey, that one’s not working,” Restroom Guy says. “Try this one in the middle.”
“O-kay.”
Seongwu continues ignoring the nagging feeling that the guy is actually looking at him while he’s washing his hands. He’s been told he’s just paranoid most of the time, but he can’t help it—he makes the mistake of looking up.
Seongwu’s met with soft, crinkling eyes which he swears are strikingly too familiar.
“Hey, you look awfully familiar. How long have you been working here?” Restroom Guy says.
“Just started last week actually.” Seongwu doesn’t know how he can lie through his teeth right now.
“What department?”
“Uhhh—” Seongwu’s cut off by the vibrating phone in his pocket.
It’s his sister calling him. He’d kiss his sister later for literally saving his ass at the right moment.
“Hey, I need to take this call. So, I gotta go?”
“Oh sure. See you around, I guess?”
Seongwu nods briefly and strides quickly out of the restroom. He answers the call from his sister while heading for the nearest elevator.
“Hey!” Seongwu exclaims. “You have no idea how you just saved me just now. You are the best sister anyone can ask for!”
“What are you so happy about?” Jinah says. “I just called to tell you that Mr. Friday Night left you a note with his number. I can’t believe you missed telling me this part.”
“What?” Seongwu slows down as he spots the elevator.
“Yeah, I think he left it by your bedside table but I saw it lying on the floor. Must be you and your silly, unorganized lifestyle.”
“Well, I doubt it’s a working number anyways. You can throw it in the trash.”
“This guy is really funny, though. Wait I’ll send you a pic of his note. He signed it as if it’s an autograph.”
“Okay. I can’t believe you called me for this. I gotta put the phone down now.” Just as he switches the call off as he’s stepping inside the elevator, he sees Restroom Guy spotting him and approaching the elevator as well.
Seongwu wants to keep his pride and his job. He’s never pressed anything this fast in his life as he presses the close sign. But somehow, Seongwu still catches the strange look of recognition in the eyes of Restroom Guy.
As he’s stepping out of the revolving glass doors of the CJ E&M building, Seongwu tries to remember if he knows Restroom Guy from somewhere, but figures that the guy’s just got a common kind of face.
He stops thinking about it as he reaches the bus stop and waits for the next bus. He didn’t bring his car with him because parking within the CJ E&M vicinity is extra challenging, and he’d rather not be stressed about it.
An old woman waiting beside him drops her handkerchief, and Seongwu bends down to pick it up. He then notices the ad for Hite on the bus stop.
Strange.
Restroom Guy really does have that common of a face.
But Seongwu wouldn’t be surprised if Restroom Guy is a celebrity. He did bump into the guy inside the CJ E&M building.
He checks his phone to check on messages he need to reply to. He opens one from his sister, the one with the attachment of the note that Mr. Friday Night apparently left for him.
His eyes widen as he sees the signature in the picture, and he quickly turns to the Hite ad just beside him.
Fuck , Seongwu thinks to himself.
As a bus arrives, his heart rate goes faster.
Because there, on the exterior of the bus, obnoxiously plastered and offensively staring at him in the face, is an ad of Kang Daniel holding a bottle of Hite with a million-watt smile.
And beside Seongwu is a larger version of the signature, just on a smaller ad on the bus stop, which also happens to be a clearer and albeit more legible version of the one on the picture his sister just texted him.
As he boards the bus and walks to an empty seat, Seongwu thinks of the odds.
The odds that restroom guy is Kang Daniel. And that Mr. Friday Night is also Kang Daniel.
Seongwu thinks that life is truly funny at times. Or maybe it’s just his.
“I can’t believe my dad is paying you to just stand around here and do nothing,” Seongwu comments pointedly at Jaehwan, his best friend, who is currently manning the cash register, but is mostly busy, possibly writing new lyrics for his new songs. Initially, Seongwu’s dad insisted on looking after the shop by himself, but since Jaehwan offered to bring his guitar whenever he’d visit, his dad, who’s always wanted the store to become a bit more lively, eventually gave in. Now, he even jams with Jaehwan from time to time with his own tambourine. Jaehwan says Seongwu’s dad is the coolest dad he knows.
“Hey! People do tend to come by,” Jaehwan says. “Tourists, mostly. They try to find foreign titles but then I let them discover on their own that alas, we mostly have Korean classics of course!”
It’s Friday afternoon and Seongwu got permission from his Boss to work from home. Their vintage video rental shop in Dongdaemun is not necessarily his home, but Seongwu’s working on a deadline about lovers reuniting after years of separation. He doesn’t know if he’s doing an okay job in capturing the tone that the producer wants, but he supposes that being around tapes of old Korean films may be just the inspiration he needs to finish this trailer.
From inside, he can sense that there’s some sort of commotion outside, but Seongwu really would rather finish piecing this project together so he can start on his other pending projects.
So much for a relaxing weekend.
Jaehwan briefly looks up from his lyrics and looks outside. “I heard there’s some sort of filming outside. Must be some big celebrities then.”
Seongwu gives a non-committal hum. His laptop is freezing every now and then, and he really just wants to finish cutting the scenes he needs.
“For someone who works in the biz, you sure seem like you’re unfazed by everything.”
“I don’t really interact directly with these celebrities. I mostly talk to producers who got the money you know.”
Jaehwan makes a appalled expression before shrugging and stepping outside to witness the commotion.
Seongwu remains unfazed and carries on with editing. In the middle of dragging the scene he trimmed to his final cut, the door opens.
Kang Daniel enters in his blonde glory.
He spots Seongwu immediately and approaches his table. Alarmingly, there is that look of recognition in the other man’s eyes, and Seongwu wants to run away at that very instant.
The odds really aren’t going in Seongwu’s favor.
“Funny seeing you here,” Daniel says. “I want to ask your name but can I use your restroom first?”
Seongwu doesn’t know how he manages to respond; it’s like his mouth has a mind of its own.
“Use of our restroom is for paying customers only,” Seongwu lets out.
Kang Daniel laughs. Seongwu can feel his resolve on the verge of crumbling. He points to the direction of the restroom.
What is it with them and restrooms, anyways? Seongwu thinks.
The door to the shop opens again, and in comes a really ecstatic Jaehwan.
“You won’t believe who just asked me if he could use our restroom!” Jaehwan exclaims.
“Humor me.” Seongwu’s pulling on his hair because now is not the right time for his Mr. Friday Night to come swooping in with his radiant eye smiles.
He hears the flushing of the toilet, and Seongwu can feel himself flushing—he doesn’t want to have this conversation right now.
“Hey what are you so stressed about?” Jaehwan says. “Is your laptop failing you again? Do you want me to buy you a new one?”
Seongwu scoffs. Jaehwan can’t even afford a new showerhead.
Daniel decides to make an appearance then. “I’m sorry, I must have come at a bad time,” he says. “But thanks for letting me use your restroom.”
“Don’t mention it,” Seongwu replies shortly, still trying to look at his laptop and not at the towering bundle of smiles in front of him.
“Do you two know each other?” Jaehwan asks curiously.
“Well we met, bumped into each other again in a restroom. It’s our third time seeing each other but I still don’t know his name,” Daniel answers.
“Seongwu-yah, tell Kang Daniel your name,” Jaehwan insists.
Seongwu really hates his best friend sometimes.
He looks up to a waiting Kang Daniel who’s scratching his neck awkwardly, looking like he’s actually waiting for Seongwu to properly introduce himself. He sighs in defeat and stands up from his seat. “Ong Seongwu. My dad owns this shop.”
“So did you lie about working at CJ E&M?” Daniel says.
“Well, not exactly.”
“He makes trailers for a living. He’s a really cool person,” answers Jaehwan, who’s looking like a proud parent showing off his child.
“Kim Jaehwan.” Seongwu’s about to say something more, but Kang Daniel cuts him off.
“I agree though. He really seems like a cool person. It’s nice to meet you Seongwu-ssi. I’m Kang Daniel.”
Seongwu, on instinct, accepts the hand that Daniel gives him. The handshake momentarily brings back memories of urgent, burning touches under neon lights, slow and soft caresses under the white sheets of his bed. Seongwu immediately squashes those thoughts.
Daniel stands a little timidly than before and avoids eye contact before continuing to speak.
“I’m sorry I just left like that. I left you a note but I don’t think you saw it. Or maybe you did but decided to throw it away?”
Seongwu doesn’t know how to react to the fact that Daniel got most of it right, and the fact that Daniel rambling and acting all small and shy despite his towering height is doing strange things to him.
“Hey, uh, Daniel-ssi, I think they’re looking for you,” says Jaehwan, pointing to the wandering people outside equipped with headsets and walkie talkies.
“Oh,” says Daniel, who seems to have finally realized that he’s been gone for a long time and needs to be somewhere else. He brings out his phone and hastily types a text, presumably to the crew outside the rental shop.
Come to think of it, Seongwu realizes that the celebrity has a name plate pinned on his red hoodie.
“I have to go,” Daniel announces, looking at Seongwu and then to his phone. When he gets no response, he smiles weakly at Seongwu and then to Jaehwan before heading out for the door.
The bell to the opening door is about to make a sound when Seongwu finally decides to say something:
“I didn’t throw away your note!” he shouts.
Daniel stops and looks back at him, eyes glimmering with what seems like hope.
“I didn’t throw away your note,” Seongwu repeats.
Daniel remains quiet, but Seongwu’s combusting, somehow, unsure of where this is headed.
“Now go back to filming your show, superstar.”
Daniel visibly blushes and says nothing, but he smiles sweetly at Seongwu before finally heading out.
“What the hell was that Ong Seongwu?” asked Jaehwan with utter fascination.
Seongwu laughs, because he doesn’t’ really know where that came from either.
“ I didn’t throw your note. Now go back to filming your show, superstar” quotes Jaehwan, dramatically waving his hands in the air while going back to the register.
“Stop it. I’ll explain after I finish my deadline okay. Go back to quietly writing your songs!”
Jaehwan, of course, doesn’t stay quiet all afternoon and keeps on bugging him endlessly. Seongwu, however, only responds with a cheeky smile at each jab. He tries not to think too much of boyish smiles and shy glances.
He’s looking over his next set of deadlines for the upcoming weeks as he’s drying his hair. He managed to upload his submission on time, and he got a message shortly after from the assistant producer that the tentative release is two weeks from now upon approval of their executive producers.
He hears a slight rap on his door before it’s opening with his sister barging in with the laundry basket.
Seongwu groans. “Ah, you really don’t know how knocking works do you?”
“Shut your face, little brother. I’m doing laundry tonight instead of tomorrow since I have to meet with additional sponsors for the upcoming exhibit.”
He’s still idly scrolling down on his phone when his sister mindlessly inspects the pockets of Seongwu’s discarded pants.
“I can’t believe you still have this.”
He looks up from his phone and looks at the note with Daniel’s autograph and number. Alarm bells go off in Seongwu’s head. He hasn’t told his sister yet, and he doesn’t know if he really wants to tell her or not. So he grabs the paper, avoiding the questioning look of his sister.
“My pants, my business.”
“Frankly, I don’t know if you’re talking about the note or something else, little brother.” His sister gives him a knowing smile coupled with wiggling eyebrows before leaving his room with the basket full of laundry.
It’s a couple of minutes before midnight. Seongwu figures the idol must be asleep already but he goes on and keys in the number from the note and types, “ Hey, superstar. :)) ”.
He hits the send button right away before remembering he hadn’t introduce himself.
He types another message saying, “ This is restroom guy, Ong Seongwu btw ”, and sends it before his battery dies.
He reaches out for his charger and plugs it to the outlet beside his bed. He wonders if he should just leave his phone switched off for the rest of the night, or maybe he should charge it and turn it on. Just in case.
Just in case loses as Seongwu stands up to switch off his lights.
Just in case is probably asleep anyways, Seongwu figures as he starts drifting off to dreamland.
It turns out that Seongwu was wrong.
Daniel was pretty much awake when Seongwu sent his text.
Seongwu is still half asleep as he scrolls through the five consecutive texts that Daniel sent him.
The fifth one has a different timestamp from the first four texts. It was sent at 3:20 am, and Seongwu doesn’t think he’s in any position to ask yet why the heck Daniel was still awake at such an ungodly hour.
Hey sorry my phone died last night, Seongwu replies. Only saw your texts now dw I’m not ded. :3
Before he can even put on his slippers and get up from his bed, his phone vibrates, showing a new text from the idol.
Sorry about the mini spam. Hope we can hang out sometime, soon? If I’m cool enough for you I guess? >.<
You’re cool enough in my book, superstar. See you soon! ;)
He puts down his phone and starts preparing for his day, decidedly ignoring the implications of the winky face he just sent.
Seongwu is by no means a fan of constant texting. Sure, he uses SNS to flirt his way to dates with free drinks, and at times casual makeouts. But apart from his group of friends, his sister and his Dad, he doesn’t really make an effort to extend text conversations.
The credit really belongs to Daniel, for the most part.
A dozen of winky faces and other questionable emojis later, Seongwu gets a text from Daniel asking if he can drop by the video rental shop anytime during the coming week.
Seongwu casually replies, asking why Daniel can have so much free time in his hands, given how hectic his schedule is. He really has no clue how the idol life works but he’s pretty sure that dropping by a shabby video rental shop in Dongdaemun is far from the usual activities of a trending It Boy.
It’s not shabby! The restroom was A Class! !! ! >__<
Seongwu lets out a giggle while reading Daniel’s reply. What is it with them and restrooms?
The idol has been abusing his cringey emoji privileges and Seongwu can’t help but feel like he’s just talking to an old college friend, given how candid they are with each other.
“Did you get yourself a boyfriend, hyung?”
Seongwu is startled by an inquisitive look from Jihoon who’s standing behind him, practically a breath away from his neck, trying to take a peek at Seongwu’s phone.
“Hey, since when have you been concerned with my relationships?” Seongwu says.
“What relationships? You mean the poor lads you dump after an almost-hookup or two?”
“You make it sound like I’m some sort of a heartbreaker, Jihoon.”
“Well, aren’t you? Anyways, I don’t think I recall you texting anyone before with that face.”
“What face? This handsome face?” Seongwu asks as he nonchalantly gestures to his face.
Jihoon makes an affronted look and hands him a clipboard instead.
Jihoon is currently one thesis film away from completing his film degree. And although Seongwu is pretty much determined into cutting off any links to his abandoned childhood dream, he keeps in touch with most of his classmates and juniors including Jihoon.
“We’re done with some of the sequences, but we’re still lacking some of the key shots especially those towards the end. Daehwi’s still in the middle of revising the lines for the last scenes. Woojin sent me the last batch of scenes he was able to edit this morning before the funeral.”
“How’s he holding up?”
“Still shocked. His uncle was practically his hero and the reason why he took Film.”
After a few beats, Seongwu asks Jihoon while tapping away on his laptop, cutting scenes that Jihoon and his team shot earlier this week, “How are you holding up?”
Jihoon sits down beside Seongwu and takes the clipboard, browsing through the pages. “We still have a long way to go but it’ll be fine. I’ll be fine. Besides, you’re already helping a lot by editing for us. If we could award you the Best Senior award, we totally would.” Jihoon offers Seongwu a sad albeit genuine smile. Seongwu reciprocates.
“I wish I could help you during weekdays,” Seongwu says. “Shoots are better than being cramped up in my desk finishing trailers for the cheesiest romcoms ever.”
“Then why aren’t you shooting rather than editing for other people? Why aren’t you making movies, hyung?”
Seongwu doesn’t reply. Instead, he drags the scenes he needs onto the timeline panel of his video editing software and stays quiet.
Jihoon says, “I’m sorry. I know it’s the last question you want to hear.”
Seongwu briefly looks at Jihoon, who then offers him an apologetic smile.
They suddenly hear a phone ringing, and for a heart-stopping moment, Seongwu mistakes it for his. But then Jihoon is getting up from his seat, phone to his ear, offering Seongwu a small smile before heading away from the table.
Seongwu’s own phone then vibrates on the table and he immediately opens the message.
I thought of a funny joke. Do you wanna hear it? : D
He replies a short Try me , before going back to dragging the scenes in order, following the shot list that Jihoon gave. Maybe being textmates with Daniel wasn’t a bad idea after all.
“Dalja’s last trailers were not perfect but Seongwu…” His Boss pauses, seemingly thinking of how to phrase his next words.
“The producers are all asking for revisions on the trailers you submitted...” Another pause. “I already sweet-talked them into reconsidering, especially for the ones that will be behind schedule if they don’t release their tv spot trailers on-time.” He pauses again, contemplative gaze set on Seongwu. “I hope you can work extra hard on your next ones, Seongwu.”
Seongwu’s Boss, Kim Junmyeon, is a very straightforward man. He was two years his senior in film school and was basically the beacon of hope when Seongwu was going through the woes of a young unemployed film school graduate.
Junmyeon is nice and formal most of the time, to the point that it scares Seongwu since he’s always just waiting for a tipping point. Everyone in their office is. They even have bets on which of them will bring out their Boss’ nasty side. Fortunately, that hasn’t happened. Yet .
But if anything, they are all betting that it would be a one-on-one experience with their Boss, in the confines of the four gray walls of his office. The very office that Seongwu is in, at the very moment.
Junmyeon’s massaging his temple with an unreadable expression on his face.
“I don’t know what to suggest, but if dating brought out Dalja’s best albeit it led to her resignation, I hope you start dating around too? I don’t believe in meddling in my employees’ personal lives. But if it helps improve the quality of your work, I think I can make an exception. You get me?”
“You’re not meddling, Boss. You’re actually not the only person who’s insisting I date around again. But I’ve been told that I break hearts.”
“Ah, so we have a cynic.” Junmyeon laughs briefly. “So the guy I pay to make trailers for movies about love is a person who doesn’t believe in it?”
Seongwu offers Junmyeon an awkward smile.
“Tell you what, let’s give it a few more time, maybe you’ll find your muse and start being a patron saint for romance movies. You’re in for a raise if you play your cards right. You know that don’t you?”
Seongwu nods and Junmyeon gestures that he can go.
Just as he’s about to pull the glass door of his Boss’ office, Junmyeon says to him, “You don’t even have to date you know, you just need to find your muse. That’s it.”
“Noted, Boss.”
As he’s walking back to his desk, Seongwu takes his phone from his pocket to check for any new messages. He tries not to feel disappointed when there’s none.
Seongwu adamantly refused for a Friday night out tonight but as he’s stuck between Gunhee and Yoojung challenging each one on their table to take a shot, he decides to just go with the flow. He made them promise him, however, to keep him in check since he brought his car and would like to drive home in one piece, thank you very much.
By some sort of miracle, Junmyeon had urged everyone to get off work on-time and offered to treat them at a posh bar at Cheongdamdong. Junmyeon had nothing but high praises on the quality of whiskies and cocktails that this bar had to offer. Seongwu has little interest on these things but he does appreciate how cozy and contemporary the basement bar is. On top of the chic interior with a welter of handblown glass chandeliers on the ceiling, there’s a live band performing a jazz rendition of an English pop song. Seongwu does frequent a couple of bars, but not so much around Cheongdamdong or anywhere in Gangnam, especially speakeasy bars like this one.
It’s only been an hour since they arrived and Seongwu swears he’s seen some familiar faces pass by, from actors to models to some news anchors. He tries not to think of the possibilities of stumbling upon Daniel in this discreet jazz joint.
He didn’t agree to any plans of meeting up again and turned down all of Daniel’s offers to meet up, including all of Daniel’s insistent offers to show up at the video rental shop and hang out. Seongwu can’t have whatever it is he has with Daniel be witnessed by a snooping Jaehwan. He hasn’t even explained to his best friend about the whole Daniel thing from weeks ago.
Seongwu doesn’t even know if they can be called friends or just really friendly textmates.
He briefly hears all the girls in the table cheering as their Boss gulps down a very suspicious looking drink in one go. Seongwu tries to squash any thoughts on this Daniel thing and focuses on not drinking himself to death. He checks his phone for a moment and finds no new messages. Now that the alcohol has kicked in, the disappointment he feels becomes much stronger.
“I wonder who got our heartbreaker feeling down and lonely,” Doyeon mockingly says. Everyone’s heads are suddenly turning towards Seongwu, and he doesn’t know if he’s in the mood to indulge them or just brush them off.
“He’s been texting non-stop for these past couple of days. It’s actually scary.” Gunhee sounds like he’s not that drunk yet so Seongwu figures he might as well play safe, seeing as their resident gossiper is still capable of remembering anything that will be said tonight.
“If you must know, I am in fact, seeing someone,” Seongwu says. “And all of you will freak out when you find out who he is.”
“Kang Daniel?” Gunhee asks with exclamation.
Seongwu gulps as everyone else turns their attention to Gunhee, who’s got this deer in the headlights look on his face, index finger dramatically pointing towards something—
Or someone?
He squints further and sees a group of extremely attractive young men dressed in casual clothing entering the bar.
Fuck , Seongwu thinks as he sees none other than Kang Daniel in his blonde glory, donning an unbuttoned red-and-black checkered plaid shirt, with a black v-neck shirt underneath.
It’s suddenly gotten hotter, and Seongwu needs some space to think. Or rather, some space to run away to.
It’s not on his agenda for the night to bump into the very person he’s sort of trying to avoid. So he slowly gets up from his seat and finds his way towards the restrooms.
As he turns on the faucet, he feels his phone vibrate continuously.
Fuck, fuck, fuck, This better not be —
Seongwu’s eyes go wide as he sees Daniel’s caller ID, and he wonders whether he should just ignore it. He lets it vibrate until the call stops.
He thinks of excuses he can say to his workmates so he can leave early and eliminate any chances of having to possibly converse with Daniel.
When Seongwu comes back to their table, he tells them, “My sister called me, urgently asking for my help for her upcoming exhibit.”
“On a freaking Friday night?” Doyeon questions, already sounding half-drunk.
“You know how my sister is. When she doesn’t get what she wants, it gets really ugly so… yeah. I better get home.”
Junmyeon looks like he’s contemplating something but gives him a brief nod.
“Take care on your way home then,” Junmyeon finally says.
He receives pouts and sleepy glares from his co-workers. Seongwu doubts they’ll even remember him leaving like this. Most of them already looks buzzed.
He feels his phone vibrating again and decides that it really is his cue to leave.
“Hey, your heart’s lighting up dude.” Gunhee points out drunkenly towards Seongwu’s breast pocket, his phone lighting up inside.
Seongwu gives them one last wry smile and takes his jacket from his seat. He feels his strides lengthen as he walks away from their table. He calls it a win as he reaches the entrance without any hitch.
His phone stops ringing and he’s about to get the keys from his pocket when he feels a tap on his shoulder.
Seongwu turns around on instinct, thinking it’s just Gunhee or any of his co-workers trying to coerce him into staying longer.
“Hey.” Daniel grins at him. “Bailing already?”
Seongwu’s brain temporarily fries at how blinding Daniel’s smile is.
“Mind if I tag along? Or are you heading home?”
Even Daniel’s eye smiles are blinding , Seongwu thinks. Heck, everything about Daniel is blinding.
“Gosh, I’m sorry if I’m imposing.” Daniel visibly deflates. “I just thought that maybe I can surprise you and I’ve been calling you trying to figure out if you were the person I saw earlier when the guys and I walked in and I—”
“Hey, hey, hey, calm down, superstar,” Seongwu finally manages to say.
Daniel gives him a warm smile and Seongwu feels the urge to keep that smile on Daniel’s face.
“I’m heading out but we can hang, I guess,” Seongwu says. “But aren’t you with your group members?”
“I told them I suddenly have plans and my manager agreed as long as I get home in one piece and not mauled by fans on my way home.”
“Well, I can be your ride home.”
Daniel visibly blushes and Seongwu realizes the implications of his simple offer. He can’t help but giggle at the situation. Everything feels like a repeat performance of another, albeit wilder Friday night from a few weeks ago.
A willing and radiant Daniel basking in the glow of the moonlight.
An impulsive decision to escape with the city lights and the cold night air as their witness.
The difference though is that this time, Seongwu is completely sober, and he may or may not be a little charmed.
“Now, where shall I take you, superstar?”
Daniel couldn’t have picked a better destination for the both of them.
“You said you needed to watch something romantic for your work,” Daniel elaborates as he tries to check if they will be able to reach the cinema in time for the last full show screening of The Shape of Water.
“It’s an American fantasy drama film about a mute cleaner falling in love with a human-like amphibian creature.” Daniel animatedly explains to him while fiddling with his seatbelt. The idol is beaming and Seongwu simply can’t rain on his parade and say that yes, Seongwu is perfectly aware of what the film is about. Movies are his life, after all.
But an animated Daniel is a cute Daniel, and so Seongwu doesn’t say anything.
Instead, Seongwu agrees to Daniel’s movie pick and says he’s excited for the human-like amphibian creature bit and the fact that it’s a film by Guillermo Del Toro.
“He’s the person behind Pacific Rim, right? I loved Pacific Rim!” Daniel proclaims to him, his satoori seeping through his deceiving Seoul accent.
Seongwu finds it cute that Daniel also knows a thing or two about movies. The satoori may or may not have made everything even cuter, made him even cuter.
“We have to pay separately okay? Or you can pay first but I will pay you later but then you have to accept it,” Seongwu says to Daniel as he rolls his window up after getting a parking ticket.
Seongwu doesn’t want to give Daniel the wrong idea that he’s here for a free movie. Seongwu’s here because he’s intrigued as to how it’d be like having Daniel for company, but he’s a working adult, fully capable of paying for his movies, thank you very much.
Daniel only gives him a toothy grin before getting out of Seongwu’s car to buy their tickets.
He’s about to call Daniel and ask if he’s already bought their tickets when he hears his name.
He looks up and sees Daniel grinning and waving at him, looking snazzy and comfortable in the black hoodie Seongwu lent him. Daniel needs to stay under radar after all, and Seongwu’s hoodie is their only option.
“I still can’t believe you’re making me watch a fantasy romance film with you. Love is already some kind of fantasy on its own. Putting the two together is like double jeopardy.”
Daniel giggles at that as he gives Seongwu his ticket. They start walking towards the cinema written on their tickets.
“The movie hasn’t even begun yet and you’re already tearing it to shreds. You’re such a cynic.”
“It’s not the movie I’m tearing apart. I just think love is a propaganda. And movies, or well, any form of art or popular media, loves capitalizing on it since it speaks to most people.”
“Except you, apparently.” Seongwu can hear a snort in Daniel’s reply.
“I said most, not all. I’m not a special case. Just not part of the majority.”
“Too cool to fall in love?”
Seongwu is taken aback and looks at Daniel who has this strange look in his face, a look that Seongwu can’t decipher.
“It’s like you’re becoming cooler and cooler every second I’m with you, I don’t think I can catch up.”
Daniel’s gaze is piercing right through him. Seongwu’s insides are suddenly feeling weak.
“Hey, that’s hyung to you, you brat.” Yep, Seongwu’s favorite defense mechanism is his mouth.
Daniel slows down, turns to Seongwu with his eyebrow raised.
“Did we ever talk about who’s older?”
Seongwu doesn’t want to come up with excuses. “I… I might have looked up your birthday once.” Jaehwan randomly read some trivia online about Daniel, including his birthdate, blood type and ideal type. “Seniority is important to me,” he says half-jokingly.
Daniel, the brat, is still smiling at him smugly, and somehow Seongwu feels more caught.
“I thought I could use the Hyung card at a perfect moment.”
“So is this the perfect moment, hyung ?” Daniel asks, turning to look at Seongwu again.
Honestly, Seongwu’s walking on pins and needles trying not to get affected by all the attention Daniel’s giving him. The hyung part makes it worse.
“Maybe so.” Seongwu hates how his mouth’s just moving on its own, responding quickly to anything Daniel’s saying or asking. Seongwu doesn’t even remember what Daniel was asking in the first place.
“I’ll make sure it stays that way then, hyung,” Daniel says.
He then gives him a blinding grin before strolling forward to the entrance of the theater. And Seongwu just follows, his mind on high alert, his heart beating erratically.
It’s about an hour into the movie when he notices the mixture of disgust and repulsion on Daniel’s face. It’s during a slightly disturbing scene, and if Seongwu inches closer, he’s guessing he can see some actual tears forming under Daniel’s eyes.
The greens and blues from the screen are reflecting on Daniel’s features and no matter how absurd his expressions are, somehow Seongwu is charmed. He keeps his glances to a minimum but he still gets caught by Daniel, who instantly offers him a toothy grin for every time he catches Seongwu looking.
The highlight of the entire date, however, if they can call it that, is when the leads made love.
It was a poignant scene, beautifully shot and scored, but Seongwu’s attention is elsewhere.
Because for the most part, he’s just looking at Daniel, whose entire face is blushing to the tips of his ears. A clear effervescent pink.
Seongwu is fucking charmed and just wants to call it a night, but he tucks the image of a blushing Daniel somewhere underneath the depths of his mind.
Seongwu has always loved the cinema, always loved movies. But at that very moment, nothing is more fascinating than Daniel.
“You weren’t kidding when you said you live around the area,” Seongwu says.
Daniel laughs while taking off his seatbelt. Seongwu doesn’t know why he has this urge to talk some more.
Seongwu feels like Cinderella, but in reverse; he’s the one trying to keep Prince Charming from disappearing back into his world.
Suddenly, he has an idea.
“Before you go, can I show you something I’ve been working on? I mean, something I’ve worked on, worked on as in something that needs revising according to the producer.”
Daniel stays still, expectant and eager.
Seongwu’s suddenly nervous. He’s never the type to personally show people his trailers. He’d link them to his friends, sure, but he never makes them watch his babies while he’s with them. He’s not sure he can take the scrutiny.
And yet.
He gulps as he hands his phone over to Daniel. It has always been his habit to have copies of his trailers with him. From experience, ideas often come to him at the most random of times and places.
“Please be gentle with my baby.”
Daniel beams at him before he proceeds to press play. Seongwu just wants to die.
The trailer he made for this movie runs for about two minutes and eleven seconds. Every second is excruciating as he’s watching the light from his phone illuminate Daniel’s face.
He’s trying to take in the minute changes in Daniel’s expression. He hears the audio cues from his trailer and tries to note in which parts Daniel reacted the most. Daniel’s “oooohhh’s” and “aaaahhhh’s” don’t help in steadying Seongwu’s rattling heartbeat.
It truly is the longest two minutes and eleven seconds of his life.
Daniel finally speaks up, “That was interesting, hyung.”
Seongwu looks at him dumbfoundedly as he gets his phone back. He feels a little dejected because interesting definitely doesn’t mean amazing, but it doesn’t mean disastrous either.
It must have been evident on his face that Daniel’s suddenly flapping his arms, looking worried that he might have said something wrong.
“Be honest. What did you think?” Seongwu means business and no matter how cute Daniel is acting at that instant, he genuinely wants to hear what Daniel has to say. “Come on, I won’t be hurt. I’m a professional.”
Daniel takes a deep breath. “I…think your approach could have been lighter.”
Daniel looks at him and looks like he’s seemingly careful of his every word. “I don’t know how the movie ends but you made it seem—” he visibly backpedals. “I mean the trailer made it seem that they’re really not getting back together. And I, well, I’m not saying you should mislead people into thinking they end up back together but I think you should still give some sort of hope that they will.”
Daniel stills, as if he’s having a voila moment. “That’s it, hyung! Hope!” The younger shifts in his seat, inching closer to Seongwu. “You could use a little bit of hope.”
Daniel pauses as if he’s waiting for any reaction from Seongwu before he can continue. “I have no idea if people out there deliberately watch movies that they know will make them sad but I think they’d be okay if the journey to that ending is worth it.”
Seongwu lets out a light laugh. “It’s funny you mention the ending. I don’t even have the final footage with me yet but yeah, I’ve always thought they won’t end up back together. I guess it really shows how much I hate romances.”
Seongwu’s still laughing but Daniel has this sad look on his face.
“How even more ironic is it that we went to see one just now huh?” Seongwu adds. “I can’t even process what I feel about the ending. I should just resign honestly. I think this really means I’m not cut out for romances. I’m really heartless, aren’t I?”
“No, no. I don’t think you are.”
Seongwu stills and just looks at Daniel.
“I think it just means you look at endings as something final,” Daniel says. “I don’t watch a lot of romances either. I’m happy with my Marvel movies, thank you very much.”
Seongwu laughs, much more genuine this time.
“You’re not heartless, hyung,” Daniel insists. “Maybe your heart just got rusty and just needs some fine tuning.”
The moment he arrives home, Seongwu opens his laptop and runs his editing software. He creates a new file and decides to start from scratch.
The producer mentioned his take was dry and uninspiring. Daniel thinks his approach could have been lighter. With a bit of hope.
Seongwu selects a couple of scenes with either of the characters smiling, and even scenes with wishful longing stares of the leads without the other looking back. He adds them onto the cut, edits them to the beat of a nostalgic Alexandre Desplat-sounding instrumental that Jaehwan gave him from a few weeks back.
In a matter of two hours and two cups of coffee later, he plays the entire thing, smiling to himself because wow , he thinks he sort of understands the selling point of the film now, even with the incomplete footage the producers gave him.
Seongwu finally understands what Daniel meant.
He still has a lot of other pending revisions he need to submit, but he’s not worried. He really isn’t.
When he goes to sleep at 5 am, he somehow dreams of a clusterfuck of blues and greens, amphibians, dimly lit car rides, and a certain blonde boy and his blinding smile.