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Droplets fell from his hair. The black mass clung to his head. His shirt and shorts were an antagonizing, wet weight on his limbs but he couldn’t find it in him to take them off.
Breathe in, one-two-three, out, one-two-three. Breathe in, one-two-three…
Tamaki’s breath came out more like a shudder. The water had long since gotten cold but he couldn’t leave. He felt like he was drowning. He focused on the steady stream of water on his head and back like it was a life preserver.
You’re alright. Stop this.
He couldn’t stop the panicked breathing. He needed quiet. Every noise, every single thing compounded, overwhelming his nerves.
You’re experiencing hypersensitivity. Big word for something so annoying.
He hiccupped. A fresh onslaught of warm tears fell down his cheeks before mixing with the water of the shower.
You’re no hero, you can’t even function properly. What would happen if the world saw you like this? They’d lose faith in you. Fat Gum would fire such a useless hero.
No, Fat Gum knows about my issues.
If he saw what you were really like, Kirishima would lose all respect.
Kirishima and I have been through so much together.
You’re hiding in a cold shower, in the dark, trying to stop crying. What if Mirio sees you and realizes you’re too much work?
Mirio has known me since we were kids. He knows and loves me.
What if it becomes resentment?
Tamaki slammed a hand against the wall. Mirio wasn’t like that. They were partners. They relied on each other for support, so much now that it probably counted as an unhealthy codependency. Tamaki would take it, though, if it meant that Mirio would never leave.
“Tamaki?”
He must have been out of it if he didn’t hear Mirio arrive. The other man was never particularly quiet when he got home.
The bathroom door opened, letting in light. Tamaki blinked and lifted his head. Water flowed into his eyes and he blinked furiously, wiping his hands across them.
Mirio appeared, peering around the shower curtain. He didn’t say anything, merely undressed and stepped into the stall with Tamaki. “It’s freezing!” He turned off the water and sat behind Tamaki. He threw his arms around the smaller man and pulled him close.
Tamaki knew he was being pathetic, but he couldn’t stop shaking. Luckily, Mirio seemed to think it was from the cold water. Tamaki felt Mirio’s hands rubbing along his arms in an attempt to warm him. He let the affectionate touches act as a balm for his nerves.
“Do you want to talk about it?” Mirio murmured, his mouth pressing kisses to Tamaki’s shoulder.
Shaking his head, Tamaki replied, “you’ll think it’s stupid.”
Mirio continued to nuzzle against his lover. “If it’s bothering you, it isn’t stupid.”
Tamaki choked down a sob. Mirio really was too good for him.
“Can I ask what set this attack off?”
Tamaki shook his head, not in denial, but in frustration. “I don’t know. Nothing. I was just thinking about watching a movie with you later and—I just,” he hiccupped. “I felt scared. My vision tunneled, and every little sound felt too loud. I just started panicking. Why am I like this? Why would you want to be with this?”
Mirio put his chin on the slender shoulder in front of him. “I want to be with you because I’ve loved you since we were kids.”
Tamaki scoffed. He couldn’t believe Mirio sometimes. But he was starting to come down. The tears weren’t threatening to fall anymore. He could almost breathe properly.
“I’m going to marry you someday, you know that?” Mirio mumbled against his neck. Tamaki’s heart resumed its panicked race as his body stiffened. “Not now,” he clarified. “We’re too busy; things are too stressful with both our work. But soon.” He held Tamaki just a little tighter. It wasn’t suffocating though; Tamaki felt like he was in a warm cocoon. “I’m going to buy you a ring. It’ll be simple, because you don’t like big, flashy things. And when it’s just the two of us, I’ll get down on one knee and ask you to stay with me forever. No crowds, no paparazzi. Just us.”
Tamaki nodded. That sounded wonderful. “I’ll say yes when you do.”
He felt the blond’s smile against his neck. “Good,” Mirio responded. “I have to stake my claim before someone steals you away from me.”
Tamaki laughed. It was a short bark of laughter, but it was genuine. As if anyone could lead him away from this man.
“You laugh, but I have my own insecurities,” Mirio admitted. Tamaki knew them; they had talked several times before about all their hopes and fears. Mirio was afraid that, without his quirk, he wasn’t enough to stand by Tamaki’s side. What Mirio failed to internalize, though Tamaki had assured him every time, was that without him, Tamaki couldn’t stand at all. To remove Mirio from his life would be akin to removing a vital piece of his own body.
Tamaki turned his head enough to touch his forehead to Mirio’s. He loved him so much.
“Can I dry you off now?” Mirio whispered against his lips.
Tamaki nodded. Mirio shot up and helped him stand. His legs felt numb.
Still naked, Mirio left the shower to find the fluffiest towel. He returned as Tamaki stripped off his shirt and began trying to peel his pants off. Thanks to the water soaked in to them, adhering them to his legs, it was easier said than done. As soon as he had kicked them and his underwear off and onto the shower floor, Mirio threw the towel over his head and started drying his hair.
“I can do that on my own,” Tamaki muttered gruffly, but his cheeks were pink, and his mouth twisted in a small smile.
“Yes, you can,” Mirio agreed as he started drying along Tamaki’s shoulders and arms. However, he didn’t relinquish the towel.
Tamaki knew better than to fight it, not that he wanted to. He allowed Mirio to pamper him. Mirio, who promised to always be there. He’d kept his word so far and, if he were honest, Tamaki trusted him to continue for the rest of their lives.
“There’s your smile.” Mirio wrapped the now-damp towel around Tamaki’s shoulders and beamed at him, bright like the sun. He leaned down and kissed Tamaki’s lips. His hands seared like flames on Tamaki’s skin.
Tamaki could face the day. With Mirio by his side, supporting and loving him, he could take anything the world threw at him. Mirio, who may not be a hero to the rest of the world, would always be his.