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Clarke
A single word and Bellamy’s life is forever changed. His heart stops and he’s sure he’s not really there, that he’s somehow dreaming.
“Clarke’s alive?” He chokes, his heart starting again, but this time at what feels like a million beats per second.
Clarke’s alive. She’s alive.
“Yes and she’s in trouble, we have to go. I’ll explain on the way.” Madi grabs his hand and he’s still not sure this is happening. Clarke’s alive.
He couldn’t breathe.
Madi explains that nightblood saved her. Clarke was living for months alone and unsure if she was going to make it. Bellamy feels his chest actually tighten and he’s certain, no pain could amount to this. He left her behind. He left her alone.
She survived but she was alone. It was too much. He felt like he was suffocating.
It doesn’t take long to get to where Clarke is. He doesn’t see her, not yet. Just people around with guns. For a moment, he stills, too scared to move, to breathe. Too scared that he’s too late, that for a second time, he’s lost her. It almost breaks him completely.
“Madi, no.” He puts his hand in front of her as she reaches for her gun and tries to exit the rover. He couldn’t let that happen. Clarke wouldn’t.
“I won’t let anything bad happen to Clarke. I promise.” And it’s a promise that he intends to keep for the rest of his life.
He sees her and it’s like coming back up for air after years of drowning. She’s alive. Clarke is alive. He wants to cry, to laugh, to just run up to her and wrap himself around her, to make to sure she’s really there, make sure she’s real.
She looks up, her eyes shining from the rover’s headlights. There’s a collar around her neck and she’s clearly in pain, but she too, looked like she could finally breathe again. Somehow, seeing each other again restored their hope, their faith, their love. It’s like they were whole again.
He steps forward, holding out a mug from their ship. He threatens their people, knowing it's his only move. The woman in front of him falters and he knows he's won. At least for now.
“Two hundred and eighty-three lives for one?” Bellamy blinks, unmoving. “She must be pretty important to you.”
It's not a question. Anyone with eyes and a working brain could see Clarke was important to Bellamy. There was no use trying to hide it anymore, not when he had lost her the first time without telling her. He needed her to know. He needed Clarke to know that no matter what, no amount of time, had changed the way he felt about her. He needed her to know that he loved her, that he always had and always would.
He looks directly at Clarke, his voice breaking slightly. “She is.”
She is. Of course, she is. It’s almost ridiculous to him because this is Clarke. The same Clarke he loved six years ago, the same Clarke he loves now. The same Clarke he would do anything for. So, of course, she is.
“Get her up.” The woman orders to the others. Bellamy flinches as they pick up Clarke. She doesn’t take her eyes off of him and neither does he.
“Follow me.” He doesn’t have to be told twice. Clarke is in danger. He’d follow these people to his death if it meant Clarke would be safe.
It’s dark, with only candle lights illuminating the small space they enter. It looks like it was apart of a village. He wondered if this was where Clarke lived.
“Your people for mine, it’s that simple.” Bellamy finally speaks. Clarke looks up from where she’s tied up to a chair. Her eyes are still wide with shock as she looks at him, probably not believing she’s seeing him after all these years.
“What exactly is your plan?” The woman crosses her arm as she steps up near him. He thinks he hears Clarke gasp, but he’s not sure. He’s still not even sure this is all real.
“You leave my people alone, I leave yours alive. We live in peace. It doesn’t have to be hard.” She laughs and the others follow.
“Peace? If you wanted peace you shouldn't have murdered my men when we landed.” Bellamy looks to Clarke, she shrugs slightly. If this were any other situation he would’ve laughed at her casual gesture.
“Maybe he’s right. There doesn’t have to be more killing.”
“Now is not the time, Shaw.” She holds up her hand sighing.
“Let her go and no harm will come to your people.” He’s using this head and Clarke feels a sense of pride.
“I’ll untie her but for now, you two aren’t going anywhere. Not yet.” She looks around the room, surveying the reactions of her people. “Everyone outside, now.” She barks. They rush out of the room, slightly scared expression on their faces. She’s their leader, that much is obvious.
Everyone leaves the room and Bellamy holds his breath. Clarke is right in front of him.
“Now, you two have a little time to catch up while I decide whether or not I should just kill you both where you stand.” She smirks as she unties Clarke and Bellamy realizes this woman is dangerous. She doesn’t seem to care about the lives she takes, she’s unforgiving and ruthless. It frightens him.
“Clarke.” He finally breathes once they’re alone. She doesn’t move, only looks at him. Something in her eyes he doesn’t recognize.
“Madi? Is she-”
“She’s safe.” Clarke breathes out at his words, relief evident on her face.
“You came back.” Her voice is raspy and soft, he barely hears it, but as soon as he does he breaks down. Tears flow down his face as he crouches next to her, finally taking in that yes, she’s alive and she’s here, right in front of him.
“I thought you were dead.” She’s crying too and it’s all too much. This doesn’t feel real but at the same time, it’s the most real thing he has felt in six years.
Clarke takes his face in her hands and looks deeply into his eyes. It’s intoxicating. Her blue eyes are the same ones he missed for years. He had almost forgotten what they looked like and seeing them now was overwhelming.
“Bellamy, you came back.” She smiles and pulls him into a soul-crushing hug and he finally has a sense of home. It was always Clarke.
They stay like that for what feels like hours. Crying in each other's arms, both of them not fully understanding what they mean to each other but knowing it transcends that of friendship, somehow even of love. It’s something more and something real. It brings them back to life.
Bellamy doesn’t want to let go. He feels if he does, she’ll slip from his grasp once again and he can’t ever let that happen. That pain, that loss, it was something that even he couldn’t understand or take. For years he wondered what it’d be like to hold her again, to even just see her once more time. Now that he had her, he was never letting her out of his sight.
“I radioed you,” Clarke whispers into his neck. He pulls back to study her face. There’s a shy look in her eyes and a slight blush on her cheeks.
“What?” He’s not sure what she means. There wasn’t a way to contact them from the ground.
“Everyday for two thousand, one-hundred and ninety-nine days, I talked to you on this broken radio I fixed. For a while, it was the only thing I had. I thought that maybe, if I talked to you, if I pretended that you could somehow hear me, that everything would be okay.”
He was speechless. His mouth hung open with a silent gasp. She spoke to him for six years. She held on to hope that he’d come back for that long while he had lost hope she was even alive. It broke him.
“I’m so sorry, Clarke.” She furrowed her eyebrows and grabbed his hands.
“There is nothing to apologize for, Bellamy. You did what had to be done. I’m proud of you.” There was so much conviction in her voice that Bellamy let himself believe it for a moment.
“I left you behind, Clarke.” His voice broke once more and Bellamy couldn’t remember a time where his chest had felt so tight and his tears came so easy.
“No,” She shook her head, blinking up as more tears fell from her eyes. “Listen to me, if you had stayed, you would be dead.” He wanted to tell her that dying beside her was an easy choice when he meant he wouldn’t have to live without her.
No words come out. He just stares at her hoping all the love and relief is reflected in his eyes. He hasn’t stopped crying since he laid eyes on her and he would’ve been embarrassed if this wasn’t Clarke Griffin. He had opened up to her time and time again, cried on her shoulder, and let her take care of him an endless amount of times. She was his best friend and that’s why he didn’t care. She had seen him at his worst and at his best. She made him his best.
“I’ve wanted to tell you for so long. I’ve dreamt of nights where I would just hold you and whisper to you how much you mean to me. That’s what it was like up there without you. I just spent my time missing you. Every single day, Clarke. Your memory stayed with me.” He was sitting next to her now, staring into her eyes as he spoke. She continues to search his face, taking in every little detail. She was taking in that he was really there and alive. He was doing the same thing.
“Bellamy.” She choked. Clarke didn’t know what to say. She had practiced the moment she’d see Bellamy again and what she’d say to him in her head a thousand times but she was speechless right now.
“You don’t have to say anything.” He said quickly. He knew it was a lot. Bellamy realized that he was a stranger to her. They hadn’t seen each other in six years. She didn’t know him.
“No.” She shook her head, wiping the tears from her eyes. “I was just going to say,” Clarke took a deep breath before continuing, not realizing how hard this actually was for her. “I missed you, Bellamy. Every single day. I-I thought you were dead, you know? I wasn’t sure if I had done it and I wasn’t sure if you were dead or not because of me.”
“You still radioed me every day.” He whispered.
“Yeah, I did.” She laughed lightly and it was the greatest sound in the world to Bellamy. “I had hope, I was still breathing, so I had hope.”
“You remembered that?”
“Every word.” She smiles. And she did, every word, every sentence, and every moment she had ever shared with Bellamy was ingrained in her memory, things she's never forgotten.
Once again, Bellamy was speechless because of Clarke.
“I love you.” He blurts out, only for a second regretting it. Clarke’s eyes widen and she leans back slightly in shock.
“What?” She chokes. She wants to scream, to cry, to laugh.
“I love you, Clarke. Apart of me always knew but was afraid to say it. I was certain though when you never came back that day. I had finally admitted to myself that I was in love with you and it was too late.” She was crying, as was he. Six years of lost time, yet somehow, nothing had changed, at least not their feelings for one another. That remained exactly the same.
“I don’t know what to say.” She laughed shyly, tucking her shorter hair behind her ears and smiling brightly. He had never seen her smile like that, it was absolutely breathtaking.
Apart of her was scared to say it. She had lost everyone she loved and Bellamy wasn’t someone she could handle losing, especially not a second time.
“You don’t have to say anything.” Bellamy smiled, squeezing her hand, he hadn’t let go since they hugged. He wasn’t sure he could ever. “I know what it’s like to say it. It always sounds like a goodbye. It’s hard for us. I know that.”
“Bellamy.” She sighs.
“Clarke, you don’t have to say anything.”
So, she didn’t.
“I know.” She grabbed his head in her hands and their lips finally met and it really was like coming home. Every single moment they ever shared was being replayed in their minds as they kissed. It was flashbacks of every memory that led up to this moment. It was the most beautiful thing either of them had ever witnessed and when they pulled away, the look in their eyes was unexplainable.
Nothing in the world could ever amount to that look. It was a look of pure longing, admiration, love, hope. It was everything and more. They were finally home.