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"Biology lab... where is it..." The preppy student searched the deserted corridors, desperately trying to get to his class on time.
Yes, it was Kihyun's first day of school in his new school. He used to go to a high school in Anyang, it was very different compared to the school he's currently in. He liked it there, even though he was stereotyped as a nerd, practically a nobody. He had a few close friends, but they all drifted away. Yoongi, his best friend he knew since he was 8 left him for another boy, Jimin, the thought of them being best friends disgusted him, he couldn't even bear seeing the two together. Mark, his quiet neighbour, he was around 2 months older than kihyun.
Mark often came over to help Kihyun with his school work, not that Kihyun was bad at school, he was just slacking off in maths, and Mark happened to be the smartest in the year level. As time passed, the two grew closer, not close enough to be best friends, but close enough for that silence to become comforting. Somehow he lost him too, one day Mark just stopped coming to his flat, stopped hanging out with him after school, instead they had short, awkward conversations at school, all because of Jackson, Mark's boyfriend who thought the innocent Kihyunnie was trying to snatch his man.
Then there was his younger brother, Lim Changkyun. He adored Kihyun and kihyun adored him equally, if not, more. Changkyun was 2 years younger than Kihyun, but he never felt like he was older than Changkyun. Changkyun was extremely intelligent and mature for his age, often babbling about atoms that Kihyun never understood. He missed his Kkukkungie the most.
To be honest, Kihyun didn't know what he was doing in Seoul, all he knew was that he was sent to this fancy private school. He misses his dear family, but it's time for him to move on, time for him to make his family proud.
Kihyun entered the toilet, splattered some water on his face, then looked in the mirror and as his small fists pumped in the air, he whispered "Yoo Kihyun, you can do this, hwaiting!"
~
"Remind me why am I here," Shownu thought as he lied on the desk, staring at the window with clear skys, already craving for his holiday's arrival.
"Hyung yah!" A high pitched voice yelled loudly and Shownu immediately knew who it was. Minhyuk. Shownu's half brother. Who would have predicted that Shownu's snobbish appa will end up with Minhyuk's wealthy eomma? Oh wait, everyone did! Despite being raised by parents with a cold heart that only cared about their business, Minhyuk was a sun, his presence brightens up everyone's day, he is the mood maker.
"Minhyuk ah! what's up?"
"There's a new kid coming today, " adding a squeal, "I heard he's from Anyang and he's very cute! I can't wait to meet him, oh, do you think he'll like hamsters? do you..."
Shownu eventually stopped listening to Minhyuk babbling, as much as Shownu loved his brother, he sometimes spoke way to much (He got told of 6 times today for speaking to much and their classes haven't even started).
Soon the bell rang, indicating that they have 3 minutes to get to class. Shownu sped through the corridors thinking "chemistry lab, where are you..." As he sped walk to the lab, he couldn't help but notice a small figure with bright coral red hair looking like a lost hamster, as if silently asking for help.
He was about to approach the cute looking man for help, but another boy approached him first, Jinyoung, he recalled. The way the red hair's eyes shone when Jinyoung talked to him just made Shownu's heart swell up, wishing for him to look at him like that.
Shownu then turned away abruptly, trying to erase the red hair boy's image from his brain.
~
As weeks passed by, Kihyun grew closer and closer with Jinyoung, who was surprisingly younger than Kihyun by a year and Jinyoung always teases Kihyun about his age. ("Yah, Park Jinyoung fuck off! I'm just 10 months older, I'm not that old -_-") Despite their petty arguments, they always had lunch together with Jinyoung's boyfriend, Jaebum, a chic boy.
Throughout these few weeks, he also noticed that there were quite a few homosexual couples, which he was grateful for. Kihyun had only came out a few months ago to his parents and his brother, luckily, his family were very open about it and they accepted him with open arms. Yes, Kihyun realised he was gay when he found himself staring at the actor from a particular drama, fantasizing about things that are never going to happen.
More often, he found himself staring at a particular boy, a boy with defined back muscles and sun kissed skin. The feature that caught Kihyun's attention the most was his lips, his thick, rouge pink lips. 'I wonder how soft his lips will be...' Kihyun zoned out, imagining his lips pressed against the older's lips.
'Awww Jaebum, look at Kihyun's heart eyes, Kihyun's totally crushing on Shownu, look at him shooting lasers to his back! ' Jinyoung gasped, 'Our Kihyunie is finally growing up. Remember what I taught you Kihyun ah, don't forget me...' Jinyoung then proceeds to dramatically clutch his heart and use it as an excuse to scoot even closer to his lover. Seeing those two lovers fawn over each other made him realise how Lonely he felt deep down, but he brushed away that thought as the sound of the bell rang through the Cafeteria, signalling it was the end of school. Just as he was about to get out of this shit hole, he realised that he had signed up for an extra session to complete his photography project. Kihyun groaned as he straightened his uniform, and slapped on a fake smile and said goodbye to the two boys.
~
'Shownu hyung, someone was shooting heart eyes at you...' Jooheon, his favourite dongsaeng said, contemplating if he should keep talking.
'Yeah!' His dance buddy Wonho chimed in, nudging Shownu with his elbow as he wiggled his eyebrows, 'he's quite cute too!'
'Where you talking about the red haired boy? Hun, he was looking like a full course meal, okay?' said Minhyuk with a blinding grin plastered on his face, 'Do you know him, Hyungwon ssi?'
Hyungwon, the paper doll paused for a second, then his eyes widened as he replied with a small smile , 'Ah you guys mean Kihyun? He's in my biology class... I swear that kid has the whole textbook memorised, he knows every answer to the teacher's question!'
'Do you think he ate his textbook to become so smart?' Asked Jooheon, who seemed completely serious about his question.
Shownu rolled his eyes at his question and walked away from the idiots who continued to investigate what Kihyun was made of, even planning on kidnapping him for a disection...
He entered the dance studio, his favourite place in the whole world. If anyone ever asked Shownu why he liked dancing so much, he would just say, "because it's an escape", then redirect the conversation as soon as he answered. He clicked play on his phone, and the powerful song boomed through the studio.
[You are by my side
There’s nothing that shines more than you yeah
I’m lost now
Like a child who’s lost his way]
~
Kihyun dragged his body across the quiet corridor, murmuring the fact that he was tired as fuck. As he got closer to the art studio, he heard music from the dance studio filling up the corridors, waking him up from his current state. Kihyun slowly crept to the door of the dance studio, peeking in the window on the door. Then he saw him. Shownu. The giant teddy bear inside the studio was dancing as if that's what he's born to do. Kihyun was mesmerized by the way shownu's body moved, how it flowed to the music perfectly, how there wasn't a mask hiding his emotions away (for once).
As soon as the music ended, Kihyun dashed straight back to the art studio, and slammed his rucksack on the desk. He took out his photography file from the wooden drawer, images ranging from nature to buildings, animals to portraits were harshly pulled out. The red hair stared at the pictures blankly, tears gathering in his eyes.
'What the fuck is this shit? Why does it look so crappy" Kihyun muttered to himself, desperately searching for a picture that deemed as a decent photograph in his opinion. After 10 minutes of searching, he gave up. He swiped all the items from the desk to the floor, tears rolling down his cheeks.
'Why am I so fucking useless…' Shouted Kihyun as dropped to his knees, staring down at the floor, distracted in his own thoughts. He didn't care how he looked, nobody was here anyways, and his sobs eventually turned into cries.
Suddenly, the door bashed open, and a concerned Shownu came running in. He dashed to the floor, kneeling in front of a crying hamster. He would say Kihyun looked beautiful if it wasn't for the situation they were in. Shownu engulfed Kihyun in a (one-sided) hug, encouraging Kihyun to let it all out. Kihyun cried even harder against shownu's chest, and after some time he finally grew the courage to look the older in the eye.
'Shownu hyung, why am I so shit at everything I do... I look in the mirror and I see a worthless piece of trash staring back. I'm not handsome, I'm not talented, I'm not even close to average. I'm a disappointment to my family…' said Kihyun, followed by a humorless chuckle.
'Everyone who was ever close to me all left me, am I really that bad of a person? I can't do any of this shit, why the fuck am I even alive, I'd be better off dead...'
'Kihyun-ssi, even though we're not close, I can you this fact. You are not shit, you're the opposite that. You are handsome, you are one of the most talented person I've ever seen. Those pictures scattered on the floor aren't shit, they show me how you feel, they show the sorrow behind beauty. Kihyun-ssi, don't cry, I'll help you get through this. We'll get through this together. ' Shownu said without any hesitation.
Kihyun shyly wiped his tears from his eyes, then flashed Shownu the most sincere smile he can muster,
'Really? Promise me you won't leave me.' Kihyun whispered.
'I promise.'
~
A few Weeks after that incident, the two were practically inseparable, as if they've known each other since birth. Over the course of these few weeks, they also discovered how perfectly they compliment each other, and how they were secretly falling for each other a bit more everyday.
'ahhh!' Kihyun squealed, as he turned his face to see who back hugged him. A blush crept up his face when he saw the one and only Shownu giving him his cutest eye smile, greeting him.
Shownu then proceeded to take the younger's hands, leading him to the art studio.
'Yah hyung, where are we going?' Kihyun asked curiously.
'Its a secret Kihyunie!' says kihyun whilst poking his tongue out.
They entered the art studio, Shownu guiding kihyun as if he was glass, vulnerable to thin air. Kihyun wanted to cry every time he saw the master pieces stuck on the walls, but not today. The room seemed different. Kihyun walked closer to the walls, letting go of Shownu's hand, observing the images on the walls. For the second time in 3 weeks, tears gathered up in his eyes, but not because of sadness, but because of adoration. The walls were filled with pictures Kihyun took, as well as pictures of Kihyun.
'Shownu yah!' Kihyun turned around, seeing his crush holding a red rose on one knee, looking straight into his eyes lovingly. Kihyun gasped as the tears finally over flow from his eyes.
'Kihyunie, I still remembered the first time we talked. How we stayed up the whole night talking about everything and anything, how your eyes were puffy from crying, how your cheeks puffed up when you laughed, how beautiful your voice is. Kihyunie, you are an amazing human being, and I'd be damned if I ever let you go. So will I have the honour of being your boyfriend?'
'Yes! Oh my gosh, am I dreaming? Yes!' Kihyun leaned forward and captured Shownu in a sweet kiss, it was not filled with lust, but filled with love and care. As soon as they parted, Shownu held Kihyun protectively, whispering, 'From now on, I'll be there when you're in trouble or in doubt, to remind you how great you truly are. I'll be by your side, so you won't be alone. '