Chapter Text
Izuku procrastinates by sitting at his bedroom window. It’s fairly large and overlooks the street below.
Normally Izuku keeps the curtains drawn, but since it’s 8am on a Saturday, he has them wide open, letting the sunlight stream in.
Izuku closes his eyes and takes a deep breath. The sunlight feels nice. Tenya always did say that he needed more Vitamin D. Izuku takes in his pale arms and overall pasty appearance and snorts. Tenya was always right.
“Izuku!” Mom shouts up the stairs. “If you’re not down here in the next minute I’m unplugging the router!” Izuku has been testing her patience for the last twenty minutes.
“I still have a headache,” Izuku calls back. There’s a pause, and Izuku thinks that she’s giving up on the idea of making him go outside.
“I don't care if you have a concussion,” She pauses. Probably from guilt. “Get down these stairs in the next minute or else you can kiss your internet goodbye!” Even though her voice wavers, Izuku can tell that she’s serious.
He relents. Izuku huffs and stands. That’s when he sees him . Katsuki.
He’s stomping around the yard in front of his house looking quite angry, but then again, that was how Katsuki always looked. Izuku wonders what’s he doing up so early, but then he sees a dog waddle from behind a tree. Oh.
As much as he tries Izuku can’t seem to bring his gaze away from him. He gives up on trying to make it downstairs on time and is more than content with watching Katsuki run after the evasive little dog.
And just when he catches it, Katsuki looks up… directly at him. Izuku freezes. Should he smile? Wave? Do both? How do you greet someone you hadn’t spoken to in four years? Izuku feels like an idiot.
It’s awkward. Katsuki had often been in Izuku’s thoughts, but he surely didn’t think he’d see him again. At least not until he recovered from... this illness.
Yeah, right.
The dog under Katsuki’s arm is adorable. It must be new because Izuku has never seen it around before. And Izuku has basically mastered the art of lurking.
Suddenly, the dog wiggles and Katsuki’s drops it. He drops the dog .
Even though Izuku wants to know if the pup is okay, Katsuki is distracted, so he takes this time to slip away.
Down the stairs he goes to his imminent doom.
…
Mom’s got a nervous smile plastered on her face. She tosses her keys from hand to hand trying to seem nonchalant, but Izuku can tell that she’s just as nervous as he is.
But hey, at least his internet connection lives to see another day!
“Got your things?” Mom asks, her voice a bit higher than usual.
Izuku opens his bag for the fifth time this morning to check its contents.
- Phone to call for help in case they get mugged or in another accident occurs.
- Earbuds to drown out the sound of people if there’s a crowd.
- A bottle of water for when the panic hits and his throat gets dry.
- Tissues for crying, sneezing and/or drooling.
- And finally, a brown, paper bag to breathe into or vomit in in Izuku’s case.
Izuku nods because his lips are so dry that they’re glued together. They haven’t even made it out the door and it’s already started.
“Are you ready?” Mom asks. Izuku can barely manage another nod.
Mom’s forehead is creased and she looks so much older than what she really is. All because of him.
Izuku knows that this is just as painful for her as it is for him which is why he can’t help but think that it’d be easier for him to just stay indoors. Dr. Yagi always says not to think like that, but Izuku just can’t help but do it when he’s in situations like the one he’s in.
Mom nods back and takes Izuku’s hand, laces her fingers with his.
She starts to chant even though it never helps. “Just keep breathing, in through your nose out through your mouth. Breathe .”
Easy for her to say. Izuku feels like he’s breathing in glass shards. His throat is getting drier by the second.
Izuku keeps his eyes fixed on his red boots because seeing the wide space around will surely finish him off. When the ground morphs into mud, Izuku starts to panic even more. His feet sink in further and further with every step.
“Mom.” Izuku clutches her arm to his chest like it’s a lifeline.
“You’re okay, sweetie. We’re almost there.”
Bugs are crawling over his skin. There’s a rock in his throat trying to choke him. Izuku’s steps are slowing, his knees folding. At this rate he’d never make it.
“Keep breathing, just keep breathing.” Mom wraps her other arm around his shoulders and squeezes. She’s almost carrying him, which is good because his legs have turned into jelly.
The edges of his vision are going black. “Izuku.” He can barely hear Mom what with the bees swarming in his head and ears. Then his feet stop working and gravity bears down on him.
He’s shutting down. “Izuku!”
His mouth is numb as the darkness takes over his vision.
…
Izuku blinks. He’s surprised yet relieved to see the ceiling overhead and not the wide open sky. How’d he get back here?
Izuku sits up, looks around. He’s on the couch in the living area, still fully clothed. “Izuku!”
Mom dashes in from the kitchen and wraps him in a warm hug. Izuku hugs back. She always did give the best hugs.
“Are you okay, sweetie? I was so scared when you fell, I thought you’d hit your head!”
“No.” Izuku runs a hand over his face. “I’m fine. How did you get me inside?”
“Oh! I had to get help, I couldn’t do it all on my own. The boy next door was walking his dog and ran over as soon as you collapsed. He helped me get you in.”
Mom smiles but Izuku, on the other hand, is speechless. Katsuki had been watching him? And then he carried him in? Izuku’s embarrassed. Who would want someone watching them have a panic attack? Not to mention fainting.
“What was his name again? He’s your friend, right?”
Izuku wants to pass out again.
He was out with Mom one day. She drove. He was in the passenger seat. He told a joke and they both laughed, he doubled over from giggling so hard. They didn’t see the car coming.
Smash. Glass flying through the air. Neck snapping forward. Pain.
They couldn’t get him out for an hour, which made the experience all the more horrifying .
Mom suffered minor injuries, cuts and burns as well as an inflated insurance rate. Izuku took the brunt of the pain. It made sense since the truck smashed into them on his side of the car. A broken leg, a sprained neck, and a broken arm.
Izuku was in the hospital for a week and a half before the doctor decided he could go home. He was basically paralyzed, leg in a cast, his neck in a brace, and his arm in a sling.
Mom felt guilty, she’d made sure he knew it every minute of the day. ‘I’m sorry’ was all that seemed to come from her mouth.
Tenya and Ochako came by some days to help and keep him company. And pretty soon, Mom had nursed him back to health.
When he could walk again Izuku made a promise, a vow to himself. Under no circumstances would he be inside a car again. And so, public transportation became his friend. Until one day he read an article about a fatal train crash that killed some folks.
That was ruined, but it was perfectly fine because he could walk to school. It was only a few blocks away anyways.
At the intersection across from the school, Izuku had his first panic attack.
Of course, he didn’t know what was happening, he thought he was dying. Heart pounding and out-of-control breathing.
But from that day on Izuku knew that that was a sign that he couldn't be near the street, or the outdoors ever again.
And so he started taking his classes online in the comfort, the security of his home.
It was fine. He was fine.
He is safe.
Dr. Yagi calls later that day since he didn’t make it to the appointment. Izuku’s relieved. Phone conversations he could handle. Car rides, not so much.
Mom apologizes a million times, and Izuku is quite sure that Dr. Yagi’s telling her there’s no need for it. He’s that humble.
Mom hands him the phone after a hushed conversation (probably about his panic attack) and scuttles off to another room. Izuku takes a deep breath and brings the phone to his ear.
“Hi.”
“What happened?” Dr. Yagi says instead. So much for manners.
Izuku sighs. “I couldn’t do it.” He’s glad that Dr. Yagi isn’t there because he knows that he wouldn’t be able to look him in the eye. “I’m sorry. I… It was, I just…”
Dr. Yagi exhales. He doesn’t like it when Izuku apologizes. “Let’s talk about why.”
“It’s stupid.”
“It’s not stupid if it makes you feel afraid. Tell me what was going through your head when you were outside.”
Izuku takes in a deep breath and exhales through his mouth. Just like Mom’s chant. “I kept thinking that something bad would happen.
“Something bad like what?”
Izuku swallows. “I don’t want to say it.” And he really, really doesn’t.
“Izuku, this is just you and me talking.” A pause. “You can tell me.” His voice is low, kind of hypnotic, teasing the answer from Izuku’s throat.
“I was watching the news yesterday and…”
Dr. Yagi sighs. “I thought we agreed that you’d stop doing that.”
Izuku takes in a shaky breath. “We did. And I was trying to…”
And he was. Truly he was. A few weeks back they’d talked about staying away from things he couldn’t handle until he learned to process better. But the news is difficult to avoid when you’re permanently shackled to your house. It’s practically impossible.
“There was this headline on sinkholes… and an evacuation was put into place. The ground was shaking and the people were scared. Then, this one family, in the hysteria of evacuating, lost their kid.” Izuku twists the fingers on his free hand into his hair. He’s sweating as he tries to imagine what must’ve been going through the heads of those poor people.
“Okay.” Dr. Yagi says softly. “Relax. You’re not near any sinkholes right now.”
So he says. Izuku clearly remembers how his feet were sinking earlier when he was having an attack. Or maybe that was just the anxiety scrambling his memory?
“I know it’s irrational.” Izuku says. And he does know that. It’s just hard to get his stupid brain and mind to cooperate at times. All the time, actually.
Dr. Yagi reminds him that fear and rational thought are enemies. Yada, yada. Izuku’s heard it a million times and it never changes anything.
To conclude, Dr. Yagi makes a follow-up appointment. Izuku suggests Monday at the same time. Dr. Yagi says Tuesday in the afternoon. He likes mixing up the dates to keep Izuku from relying on a routine.
Izuku’s already trying to invent an excuse as to why he can’t leave the house next week.
…
The next day Tenya and Ochako drop by. It’s rare that they visit because of school and all of the extracurricular activities that they’re in, but when they do, Izuku is elated.
Normally they watch movies or cartoons and talk about anything but Izuku’s condition , but today, today is different.
Izuku’s in the middle of a heated match of Mario Kart against Tenya when Ochako says, “Bakugou-kun asked about you at lunch today, Deku-kun.”
Izuku promptly drives Baby Daisy off the road letting Iggy zip by and pass the finish line. Tenya cheers. Shit.
But had he heard correctly? Katsuki was asking about him? Izuku, or more preferably Deku, the housebound, fainting reject?
It seems so far-fetched that Izuku laughs. He sets the controller on the table and moves to sit on the sofa. “Yeah, right. And I’m leaving the house tomorrow.” Izuku says. “You can’t be serious.”
Ochako tilts her head to the side and stares at him for a bit. It would be weird to anyone else, but Izuku’s gotten used to her little quirks.
“Yes.” She picks up the controller on the table and closes the software.
“Pardon me!” Tenya says from the floor. Ochako ignores him.
“I am serious. He wanted to know why you weren’t at school anymore.”
Izuku stops breathing. This is… unexpected. Did Katsuki seriously not know what happened? Had he really not noticed that Izuku hadn’t been attending school for the last four years?
“And what…” Izuku scratches at the flaky patch of skin on his wrist. “What did you tell him?”
Tenya speaks for her. “I began to tell him about your condition, but Uraraka-kun pulled me away and told him to mind his business.”
Ochako nods firmly and then gets up to change the game. “It wasn’t! And besides, it wasn’t our place to tell him that. If he wants to know, he should come and ask you himself, Deku-kun.”
Izuku cringes at the thought. Verbal interaction with Katsuki? He’d rather stay inside his whole life. Izuku scratches a bit too roughly and then his wrist starts to bleed. Ouch.
“I… I’m going to get some water.” And then he jumps off the couch and scuttles out the room.
The blood starts to drain down his wrist, Izuku wipes it away with his sweater. He’d have to wash it later.
Izuku hears Mom talking before he makes it to the kitchen.
“Can’t you send Saeko? Or what about Misa?” She’s on the phone at the table with her back turned. She sounds so worried that Izuku is immediately concerned.
“Things are a little tricky with Izuku and I’m not sure if I can leave him now.” Her shoulders sink with every word.
Mom’s a seamstress. She does most of her work from home, but every once in a while she gets called away for a big job, like making dresses for an entire wedding party.
She’s good at what she does, the best that her employers have, so Izuku can’t help but feel entirely guilty for keeping her stuck with him.
“I’ll be there.” She says. Izuku takes this as the cue to sit down. Mom doesn’t even stir when he plops down next to her. She hangs up and winces at Izuku. “Sneaking up on me?”
“How’d you know I was here?”
She pats his freckled cheek. “You’re my child, I always know where you are.”
Izuku stays quiet because his stupid brain is searching for any validity in her statement. She mistakes his silence for anxiety.
“I should have applied for that nine-to-five gig at the shoe store.” Mom rubs her face, pulls down her cheeks to reveal the pink under her eyes.
“But you love your job.”
“I do. But I hate leaving you here alone.”
“I’ll be fine.” Izuku says. His fingers find their way back to his wrist. He picks until it stings. It must be bleeding again.
“Maybe I could call in sick? Misa can probably handle this one on her own.” She’s not listening. She never does when things like this happen.
“Mom.”
“Yes?”
“I’ll be okay.”
She sighs. “Izuku…”
“I just need groceries. I promise I can do the rest on my own. Really, I’ll be fine.”
Izuku’s oversimplifying things. But only to make Mom feel better about going. She shouldn’t have to waste her life waiting on him hand and foot. It’s just not fair.
“Hmm…” Mom says and gets up from the table. “Guess I better start packing.”
Izuku remembers when he first realized that something was wrong with him. His brain, that is. Tenya, being the observant guy he was, was the one who brought it up.
He’d come over one day after school to check on him. “Would you like to go to the library with Todoroki-kun and me?” He asked.
Tenya had always had a huge crush on Shouto.
Izuku smiled and replied with “Maybe next time.”
Tenya pushed his glasses up his nose and brought a hand to his chin. As he did every time he was about to spew some life-changing information.
“Midoriya-kun, you look very pale. I believe your Vitamin D intake is low. Perhaps we should go for a walk.”
Izuku flinched at that and he shook his head feverishly, wrapped himself in his jacket tighter. “I don’t know Iida-kun.”
Tenya was very, very persistent. Izuku wished that he’d stayed in his room instead of feeling adventurous and moving to the living room.
Tenya waved a hand at him wildly. “It is very unhealthy for you to be inside all day like this.” And Izuku was livid.
“It’s not like I want to be this way,” Izuku snapped. “But I—” His bottom lip started to quiver, and he couldn’t even finish his sentence because the tears came. Snot came running out his nose and fat tears were rolling down his freckled cheeks. Izuku had always been an ugly crier.
“Midoriya-kun!” Tenya grabbed the tissue box off the table and sat on the sofa next to him. “What’s wrong? Are you ill?” He laid a hand against Izuku’s forehead.
Izuku pushed it away. “N-no… I just…!” He spluttered between breaths. His chest heaved and he felt like his heart was going to pound out his chest, the beginnings of a panic attack.
Tenya noticed this and helped him to get his breathing under control. Then he rushed to the kitchen to make them some tea. Izuku was grateful.
When he came back he held Izuku’s hand until he calmed down some more. “I can’t… go…” He spoke slowly and softly, fragile even.
“I can’t explain it… but I know that… if I leave…” Izuku trailed off. He couldn’t bring himself to say it out loud. He knew that he would die if he left the house. It was a fact.
Tenya seemed to know what he was alluding to, though. He nodded and pushed his glasses up his nose again. “I’m terribly sorry, Midoriya-kun, I did not know that you felt this way.” And then he released Izuku’s hand and hopped up so fast that he almost spilled his tea.
“Please accept my sincere apologies!” Tenya said a bit too loudly before he bending at the waist into a ninety-degree bow.
Izuku smiled, fanned a hand at Tenya. “It’s fine. It feels a lot better to get that off my chest.” He patted the spot next to him, gesturing for Tenya to sit.
They finished their tea together in a comfortable silence.
It’s Sunday. Mom comes down the stairs lugging her bags at her sides. She’s struggling to carry them both, so Izuku runs up and grabs one. He almost topples over with from the weight.
“Whoa! What’d you pack, Mom? Bricks?”
Mom snorts. “Very funny. It’s actually my sewing equipment.”
Oh.
They reach the bottom of the stairs and Mom shakes her head. “I can’t believe I’m doing this to you.”
This again. Izuku wants to sigh, but that wouldn’t be very polite now would it?
“It’s fine, Mom. It’s only for two days—”
“Less, if I can leave sooner,” She interjects. Then she digs into her purse and pulls out a compact. She dabs under her eyes and around the corners, trying to mask the wrinkles, probably.
Makeup days for Mom are pretty much nonexistent now. She stopped wearing it when he got sick and couldn’t leave the house as much. Guilt bubbles in Izuku’s stomach.
Mom needs these trips away. To be with grownups every now and then. To be social and not secluded. Izuku secretly hopes that she’ll finally ask Misa-san out to dinner. Mom’s crush on that lady was blatantly obvious.
“Okay.” She closes her compact. “Hotel, cell, num—”
“Are all pinned on the fridge.”
She nods and smiles. “I’ll call—”
“Before bed and when you wake up. I know, Mom. Stop worrying, go have fun.”
Mom gives a closed mouth smile before she tugs him down and kisses his forehead. She’s at the door when she whirls around and says, “Oh! Meals on Wheels is delivering tonight at six.”
“Got it. Tonight at six.” Izuku taps his forehead.
“Should I write it down for you?”
“Mom. Go.”
Izuku stays at the door while she loads the car. He’s trying so hard to step outside onto the porch that he almost misses Mom honk the horn and back out of the driveway. He waves and watches her drive away. Then she’s gone.
Izuku looks down at his sock-clad feet. He can do it. Get one foot out. Slowly, he lifts his left leg and holds it out. He lowers it down slowly and then it’s touching the cold concrete.
He closes his eyes and stays like this for a while. This isn't so bad. He’s about to attempt the other foot when he hears rustling. And when he looks up, he sees Katsuki across the yard. He’s staring back at him.
Eep!
Izuku retracts his foot, jumps back in, and slams the door, locking and deadbolting it in record time.
That was close.
He’s full of nervous energy after that, so he decides to put it to use by studying. Izuku doesn’t have to study over the weekend, but his grades could be better since they’d started to decline in the past week. It’s probably due to his nervousness about Mom leaving.
The day goes by pretty quickly after that. He studies, eats, watches cartoons, plays on his Nintendo Switch , repeat. It gets really monotonous after a few hours, but what else can he do? Go for a walk? Ha!
Izuku’s playing a ranked match on ARMS when there’s a knock at the door. He looks at the clock on the wall. It’s 5:43. It has to be Meals on Wheels, but they’re seventeen minutes early. Seventeen whole minutes .
He loses the match when Spring Man lands a solid hit on Twintelle. Down she goes, right along with his rank level. Bleh.
Izuku can’t find the time to be upset about that when danger is lurking right around the corner. Or in this case, the front door. He turns the television off and starts to creep towards the door. He’s just reached the door when there’s another knock.
He peeps through the window and sure enough, there’s a blond-haired lady out there right along with his groceries. Shit.
Quickly, Izuku formulates a lie because if there was one thing he hated more than going outside, it was talking to strangers.
She knocks again, this time harder. She must be getting irritated.
Izuku fakes a loud cough. And then a sneeze. “I-I have the flu.” Another cough. “Just leave them at the door, please!”
He hears a sigh and then a voice says, “Okay, but you have to sign for them. It’s a policy.”
Ugh. Izuku paces while he thinks of what to do next. Absentmindedly, he twirls a hand into his hair and tugs. “Uhm…”
The seconds tick by and Izuku’s almost certain that the woman’s left by now until he hears papers flipping. Huh?
“Look here, sir.” She says in a tone that Izuku can only describe as bitchy. “I don’t have all day to waste here with you, I’ve got a job to do.” Her voice gets shrill. “I’ve signed these damn papers for you, but if I lose my job, it’s going to be your ass!”
Sheeh. Who spit in her cereal?
Izuku hears retreating footsteps and when he peeks out the window again, he sees the lady hop in her car and drive off. Phew. Crisis averted!
He opens the door to grab the bags, but they’re not there. That’s when he sees them sitting down the steps on the concrete walkway. Fuck.
Izuku starts to pace again, twisting his fingers into his hair trying to figure out how in the heck he was gonna get those groceries.
Maybe he could call Dr. Yagi? He did give Izuku his number, but only for emergencies. But this is an emergency! Isn’t it?
Izuku decides against that one. Since it involved too much of an explanation.
Then, it hits him. Izuku runs to grab the broom from the kitchen and dashes back to the door.
Just like fishing Izuku thinks. Then he realizes that he’s never been fishing so he wouldn't even know what it’s like. Oh, well.
Izuku twists the lock, pushes the door open with careful precision. He reaches out with the broom, down the steps, and he thinks, this is way too easy.
Izuku slides the broom handle through the bag handles. Yes! He starts to lift them slowly. They’re just up the steps when one starts to slide. Hmm. Izuku readjusts his grip, and tries to move faster, but then the others soon follow suit and the bags hit the steps and tumble back down. No!
Someone coughs. Izuku freezes. And sure enough when he looks up a person is there. Katsuki .
Izuku’s first thought is that this guy spends way too much time outside, and then that he looks surprisingly… calm. Izuku isn’t sure what to make of it.
It’s silent as Katsuki stares him down. Izuku can’t even bring himself to make eye contact with him. His gaze is too intense.
“Do you need these?” Izuku looks up to see Katsuki gesture to items at his feet. The groceries.
Izuku nods vigorously.
He stoops down, grabs the few bags in his arms. Izuku scuttles back on his hands, makes room for Katsuki to deposit them on the floor. It occurs to him then that, for the first time in forever, a stranger is standing in his home.
Izuku hops up from the floor, bounces on the balls of his feet. God, he must look pretty silly right now.
But as he finally meets Katsuki’s eyes, he sees not a hint of confusion. Just pensiveness.
Izuku clears his throat, mumbles, “Thanks for the help,” and gives a sheepish grin. Maybe Katsuki would overlook the fact that he was fishing for his groceries with a broom?
“The hell were you doin’ in the first place?” Katsuki asks.
Nope. His act of oddity could not, or rather, would not be overlooked. Typical. Izuku decides to use the same lie as before.
“Um, I— I have a cold,” He gives a meek cough into his shirt. “I didn’t wanna step out.”
“Hm.” Katsuki seems to contemplate this, and then, “Whatever, Deku.”
It should catch Izuku off guard, the nickname that is, because Katsuki is the one who gave it to him after all. But something about it seems so familiar and innate that he just bites back a smile.
“Nice seeing you… Again. What’re the odds!”
Except then, he stared through a window and across a yard. Not in person. And Izuku certainly does not remember Katsuki being this good-looking. Izuku would’ve definitely remembered this. Four years changed a guy, for sure.
“Hell must’ve froze over,” Katsuki says. “That’s my bet, anyway.”
Maybe so.
…
Izuku wakes in the morning to the sounds of buzzing and birds chirping. He rolls over and sticks a long arm out of his warm cocoon of blankets to retrieve his cellular device. Mom’s caller ID flashes on the screen. It’s early, only 6:07, so what could she possibly want? Regardless, Izuku answers it.
“Izuku, sweetie?” Mom’s voice is soft and sweet, but immediately, Izuku can tell that something is off. Something has gone terribly wrong.
“Mom,” Izuku sits up in the bed, “What’s wrong?”
“Did you get some sleep?” She’s answering a question with a question, another sign that something bad has happened.
“Yes.” Izuku lies, she didn’t need to know that he’d only gone to bed three hours ago.
“That’s good.”
It goes silent. Izuku counts the seconds that tick by. Seventeen. Seventeen , that evil number that taunted him the evening before. This further confirms that a tragedy has occurred. He just doesn’t know what it is yet.
Izuku takes a shaky breath. “Mom. Did something happen?”
“Don’t be alarmed.” That’s all it takes for Izuku to lose it. His chest starts to heave, his breathing gets shallow, and he breaks out in a cold sweat. His free hand has the bedsheets balled into his fist.
“Hey now, don’t do that,” Mom’s sweet, gentle tone is now backed with steel reinforcement. “Take some deep breaths or you’re going to pass out.”
“Tell me what’s wrong.”
“Sweetie, you’re talking to me now, so it can’t be too bad, right?”
“Mom.”
“Everything is fine, I promise you.”
“Mom!”
“There was a small collision.”
Izuku stops breathing. The first thing in his mind is the accident before. The accident that put him in the situation that he’s in now.
“Izuku, listen to me.”
He can’t.
Mom is saying things, but all Izuku can hear is the sound of squealing brakes and crunching metal. Death. “Are you—” Izuku cuts her off while she’s mid-rant about some stupid driver who ran a stoplight and plowed into the side of her car. “Are you okay?”
He kicks the blankets away because they were fricking suffocating. Then he moves to get out the bed and pace because pacing seemed to be the only that calmed him these days.
“Just a few scratches, but the doctors are doing a great job taking care of me.”
“You’re in the hospital?”
Hospitals were for sick people. Hospitals are for sick people. Mom is not making sense. How is she okay if she’s in a hospital ? Izuku doesn’t believe her. Not one bit. Mom was most certainly not okay.
His legs feel like jelly. Izuku takes one more step before they decide to give out and he collides with the floor face first. Ouch.
Mom must’ve heard the thud because then she says, “Izuku, what was that? Please. Talk to me.”
Izuku cradles his stinging face and ignores Mom’s tinny, little voice coming from the phone. He just can’t find it in him to speak to her at this moment. Not when she couldn’t even tell him that she wasn’t okay. Lies.
“Sweetheart, listen to me.” Mom’s voice is firm, the soft tone from before long gone. “I. Am. Fine. I’m going to be okay.”
When he does respond she keeps talking. “I’m alright, you’re alright, we’re alright.” She pauses. “Say it with me, Izuku. I’m alright, you’re alright, we’re alright.”
She repeats a few times before Izuku can find the strength to say it with her. They say it for a while longer together. It calms him a bit, but it still doesn’t stop the terrible sounds of car horns and sirens from playing in his head.
“Yes, sweetheart, that’s good.” Izuku can practically hear the smile in her voice. “We are going to be fine.” She takes a breath. “Dr. Yagi is coming over today to check on you. You are not alone, Izuku. We would never leave you alone.”
Izuku wants desperately to believe her. “Okay…” He says hoarsely.
Mom tells him that she loves him a few hundred times and that she’ll call again today and then she hangs up. Izuku curls into the fetal position on the floor and squeezes his eyes shut. The sounds of death from before still persist.
It’s times like this when Izuku wishes that his stupid, defective brain had an off switch.
…
Around twelve, Izuku slowly makes his way out of the stifling heat of his bedroom. He stumbles down the steps to the kitchen in search of comestibles.
Izuku settles for crackers and peanut butter since it doesn’t require extreme brain power to prepare. Izuku doesn’t think that he could even boil water in this frame of mind.
He sits on the floor in the den with his snack. He’s slowly coming back to himself when there’s a knock at the door. Izuku looks at the clock on the wall. It’s 12:20, Tenya and Ochako aren’t out of school yet, so who could it be?
Maybe it was Dr. Yagi?
Izuku creeps to the door, and then the floor creaks, so he throws himself to the floor and crawls the rest of the way. Stealthy.
He peeks out the window and gasps. It's not Dr. Yagi, instead, it’s… Katsuki.
But why? How? Shouldn’t he be at school?
Then Izuku’s mind does that stupid thing when it makes stories that are so fabricated and dumb that he believes them.
He can’t open the door, what if it isn’t Katsuki but Katsuki’s long lost twin? Or maybe it’s Katsuki from another dimension. Or maybe he—
There’s pounding on the door. “Open the damn door, Deku, I know you’re in there. Where the fuck else’re you gonna go?”
Izuku blinks at the harshness, yet truthfulness of that statement. Definitely Katsuki.
Hesitantly, Izuku reaches up and unlatches the lock and deadbolt, leaving himself vulnerable to whatever attack the evil Katsuki twin wanted to unleash.
The knobs twists and the door flings open to reveal a peeved-looking Katsuki. Oops.
Katsuki stomps in and kicks the door shut behind him. It leaves a scuff on the paint that Izuku would have to scrub off later. Izuku silently wonders what Katsuki’s own front door looked like.
Izuku clears his throat. “Why aren’t you at school?” And then he realizes that that might have come off as a bit rude, and that was the last thing he wanted to be to Katsuki. “Ah, I-I mean, did they release early or…?” Izuku picks at his nail beds nervously. He must sound like a complete fool.
Katsuki scowls and turns his nose up. Very classy. “I tested out of math and science, so I don’t have to take those.”
Whoa. Izuku always knew Katsuki was smart, but not that smart.
Even Tenya hadn’t tested out. He said that he needed to be at school for the full seven hours. A load of BS.
That still doesn’t answer why he’s here. Izuku decides to cut to the chase and ask. Politely .
“So… is there a reason for you stopping by?”
Katsuki frowns and folds his arms over his chest. Izuku hopes that he hadn’t pushed a button. “Your ma called. She told me to check on you because she was worried.”
Izuku is speechless. Mom talked to Katsuki? Somehow Izuku just can’t imagine the two speaking to one another. Leave it to Mom to do make the impossible possible.
How did the conversation even go? Hello, young boy whom my son hasn’t seen in four years, would you mind checking on my anxious, housebound child? Weird.
Katsuki clears his throat. Izuku looks back up. He really had to stop zoning out.
“So. Do you... need anything? Help or something?” Katsuki’s cheeks look kind of pinkish. Wait. Is he blushing?
Izuku swallows. “No, no. I’m fine. Thank you for coming over. The company was nice.”
Katsuki scratches the back of his neck. “Whatever, I’m going now.” He promptly turns on his heel and runs smack dab into the door.
Izuku can’t hold in his giggles. It was, dare he say it, cute.
Katsuki curses and fumbles around with the door before he throws it open and dashes out and across the yard to his house.