Archive of Our Own ^beta

There were many things to be said about growing up in an abusive situation. No one needed to point out that this sort of childhood left scars, or that it would affect the child in question forever. But sometimes Daken wondered if people truly understood just how deep these things went and what kind of twisted worldview came with the level of trauma that he had suffered. It was moments like these when he questioned it but more so, he questioned if he himself underestimated the extend to which trauma could be healed.

Bobby was lying in his arms, contently playing on his 3DS and completely unconcerned with being so vulnerable and open with someone who could kill him in the blink of an eye. That either made this man incredibly brave or stupid. Or both. Or neither. Because in reality Daken would never be able to harm him and Bobby just knew. They never said the three words, they never named what they had but Bobby knew.

It was so simple to be with Bobby. Daken had expected it to be the most complicated thing he had ever attempted.

“Oh shit!” Bobby groaned and shook his head, “RNGesus has abandoned me!” With a loud click he closed the 3DS and looked back at Daken, “So cheap, so freaking cheap! How is that even possible? I’ve been grinding for hours and that boss just one shotted me!”

His expression softened and Daken brushed some of these curls back behind Bobby’s ear, “Life's never fair, Snowflake.”

Life isn’t fair. The hell are you going on about? Daken almost rolled his eyes at himself. That was a true statement but the kind that was so obvious that making it seemed redundant. Despite the cheerfulness of his partner, Daken was stuck in a kind of mood that made his thoughts circle around negativity.

“This isn’t life though! This is a stupid game. There are rules and expectations and this game just shit all over me.” Bobby rolled over and looked into those gorgeous deep blue eyes, “It’s killing me.”

“Hm.” Reaching out he took Bobby’s hand and turned it, kissing the pulse point. “No, you are most certainly still alive. Your heart is beating.” It was. The soft thud, thud, thud of it was something Daken savored whenever he was close to Bobby. He could hear the heartbeat and it was often what lured him to sleep at night. A lullaby just for him.

“You’re taking it way too literally.” Though he was chidding Daken Bobby was also blushing and pressing close, “It’s killing my soul.”

“Well, what do you want me to do about that?” Daken arched a brow and looked at the gaming device. Bobby loved that sleek, silver thing and practically seemed to carry it wherever he went. Daken found no joy in handhelds even if he could see the appeal of a round of Mario Kart on the big screen. “Shall I stab the evil thing? I’m good at stabbing things.”

“You can’t stab it! Then I’ll lose all my save data.” With a sigh he shoved the thing under the pillows and then wrapped his arms around Daken’s neck, “You don’t want to make me cry do you?”

His hands settled around Bobby’s waist and he looked at his partner for a long moment before whispering, “Never.” It would be easy, simple, to make Bobby cry. Daken knew enough about him for that but there was no urge to do it whatsoever. In fact the idea of hurting Bobby, in any way, scared him.

“So serious.” The look on Bobby’s face was one of concern and care. He shook his head and then leaned forward a little till their noses touched. “You’re not gonna hurt me. I know that. The only sort of tears you’re gonna make me cry are happy ones.”

“Too trusting.” Shaking his head he reached up and traced that full bottom lip with his thumb, “How have you survived so long, trusting people like me?” Don’t trust me, you childish fool.

“Daken, I don’t make a habit of trusting ‘people like you’.” Finger kisses followed. Bobby loved kissing on Daken, every part of him he could get his lips on in fact. “You aren’t a fluffy puppy. I know you’re not perfect. You’re a cat, you’re sweet and cuddly but you still kill birds and play with them.”

That did pull him out of his thoughts a little and Daken chuckled, “And then I bring them home to you because I think you’re a bad, bad hunter.” Nuzzling in he kissed over Bobby’s cheek and then down his neck.

“See, you’re a good kitty.” Bobby tilted his head to give Daken better access. “Not a bad guy, just a misunderstood cat. You had a bad, rough start -” Bobby moaned as Daken continued kissing on him, “- blossoming into a good house kitty now.”

“I swear one day you’ll ruin my reputation with calling me Kitten and Kitty.” Another kiss and then he set into leaving a mark on that already bruised neck. Daken liked to leave little reminders on Bobby’s skin that no one but him could have Bobby.

“Oh no! People will think you’re nice!” The words came out a great deal more breathy and desperate than Bobby had meant them to.

“You think you’re so funny.” His hands slid up and snuck under Bobby’s deep red shirt, gentle fingers tracing over warm skin. “But what if someone actually expects me to be nice and kind to them? What then, hu? I’m horrible!”

With a large, shit eating grin on his face Bobby said, “Life isn’t fair, now is it Kitten?”

Daken blinked, once, twice and then he groaned in defeat. “I hate you so much, Snowflake! So much.”

That always made him chuckle. Bobby leaned in and kissed Daken warmly. As they pulled away he looked right into those beautiful eyes and said with feeling, “I hate you too Kitten.”

There was a long pause as Daken looked up at Bobby and studied the man’s expression. The silence felt heavy but not uncomfortable and when he broke it, his voice was barely a whisper, “Daisuki.”

The word was understood, that was more than clear from the joyous expression on Bobby’s face. He nodded and hugged Daken tighter, “Daisuki.”