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Not Quite Impartial

Summary:

In which Jeremy and Christine do a little research.

Notes:

yoo hey hi. I tried to write this last month, but it wasn't very good, so i decided to let it sit so that I'd be able to rewrite it better, but then school happened, and then I got distracted by other fics.

anyway here we are. it's the end of the Not Quite series. Can you believe it? I can't. We've been at this for like three months.

this is dedicated to FantasyQueer (hi hi) since this is the last of this series and because I'm still like 90 percent sure they are what got me into writing nonbinary Jeremy.

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Work Text:

It was a summer day spent in Jeremy’s room when Michael brought up something interesting. “Hey… hey Jer,” he said, reaching out and poking their shoulder. Jeremy looked over at him with a sligihtly bemused expression. “Since you’re not a boy… does that mean you’re not straight?”

Jeremy blinked at him and Christine also turned to look at him. “Are you stoned?” Jeremy asked as Christine asked, “Did you smoke before you got here?”

“It’s a sincere, curious question,” Michael insisted. “For me, it’s easy, because I’m a guy, and I like other dudes, so I’m really gay. And you like girls, but you’re not a boy or a girl, so….” Michael trailed off in silent confusion.

“I… guess I never thought of it?” Jeremy admitted. “Huh…” They stood and took their laptop from their desk, returning to sit back down next to Christine. They opened it and opened a web browser.

“Oh, are we researching?” Christine asked, bouncing slightly and clapping her hands in a somewhat excited manner. She enjoyed learning about these sorts of things. She found it interesting.

Jeremy flashed her a quick smile. “Yep.” They typed something out in the search bar, after humming to themselves and deciding on a few choice words.

The room was silent for a few moments as the results of the search loaded on the screen before Michael said, “Yeah, I think I’m stoned.”

Jeremy rolled their eyes good-naturedly. “Go take a nap, it’ll wear off,” they said, smiling slightly. They barely paid attention as Michael made himself more comfortable on the bed he’d been hanging off and closed his eyes. Jeremy hummed and clicked a link. “Oh, here’s a list of terms.”

Christine read over their shoulder as they scrolled through the list. “Cisgender?” she questioned, the word catching her eye.

“Yeah, like you.” Jeremy paused their scrolling to let her read the word.

Christine couldn’t help but feel a little unsettled to be regarded as such. It wasn’t offense she was feeling, like those people online who would get offended for not being referred to as “normal”. She wasn’t sure what it was but something felt off. She hesitated.

“Are you okay?”

“I… don’t know,” she said honestly. She stared at the screen in thought.

After a few moments of silence Jeremy leaned back and asked, though not very seriously, “Is nobody in this room cis?” It was an offhand question, and they weren’t actually asking for an answer, but they looked slightly surprised when Christine replied.

“Guess not.”

Jeremy sat up and glanced at her. “W – well, what works best for you, then?”

Christine looked up from staring at the screen. “Well, I’m not a boy for sure,” she said.

Jeremy couldn’t help but smile a little, remembering that when they were questioning their own gender they had said that they definitely weren’t a girl. They settled their laptop comfortably on their lap and started scrolling through the list of terms again. “Okay, what about any sort of masculinity at all?”

Christine hummed in thought. “No,” she decided, shaking her head.

“Not transmasculine, then,” they murmured, still scrolling.  “Genderfluid? It’s where your gender kind of.. changes from time to time. And not necessarily just between boy and girl.”

“I don’t think that’s me, either.”

“Agender? That’s sort of… a lack of gender, is the best way I can explain it.”

“It feels better, but not exactly the right one.” Christine sighed softly and leaned against Jeremy’s shoulder, eyes skimming the screen.

“Genderqueer.”

“No.”

“So I guess not nonbinary either? Since they are very close to being the same thing.”

“Not that either,” she agreed.

Jeremy scrolled down some more. “Oh, well,” they said. “There’s the word I was looking for me.” They read it to themselves: ‘gynesexual – primarily attracted to women or femininity’. They nodded quietly to themselves and continued scrolling after a few moments of absorbing the word.

When the two of them finished skimming that list, Jeremy tried the search again. They clicked another result, of another list of terms.

“Gender’s fucking confusing,” Christine mumbled after realizing they had been looking for ten minutes.

Jeremy made a gasp and looked at her. “Christine!”

She pouted. “I can swear too.”

“You’re too…” Jeremy waved their hands about. “Innocent.”

Christine raised an eyebrow and laughed. “Innocent? I’m in theater.”

Jeremy looked like they wanted to say something else, but then relented. “Yeah, I guess you have a point there,” they allowed. They looked back at the screen after shaking their head and hummed softly. “Demigirl?”

“What’s that?” Christine asked, glancing at the screen. Her attention had wandered as it usually does.

“It’s more of a partial thing,” Jeremy explained. “Demigirls partially, not wholly, identify with being a girl, or associating with femininity. Does that make sense?”

“That makes sense.” Christine nodded slowly and stared at the screen. A small smile appeared on her face. “Yeah, that makes sense,” she repeated, but her tone was more positive, more bright.

Jeremy smiled at seeing her face light up. “Demigirl, then?”

Christine nodded and clapped, which ended up waking Michael. “What’d I miss?” he asked, rubbing the sleep from his eyes, or trying to, since he hadn’t taken off his glasses when he fell asleep.

Jeremy looked at Christine. Christine nodded. They looked back at Michael and said with a grin, “Nobody in this room is cis.”

Michael blinked for a few moments, processing. Then he started to laugh. “That’s fucking great.”

Notes:

i got the idea of demigirl Christine from a series called meremine fics! go ahead and check them out, it's neat. I'm trying to write my own meremine fic!

Also i sort of wanted to end this as I had started it, with someone discovering their identity. Thought it would be nice.

I hope you all enjoyed reading this series as much as I enjoyed writing it! It's been fun.

come yell at me on tumblr: esperinkdraws

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