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Peter Goes To Japan

Summary:

The Griffins go on a special trip and end up meeting some familiar faces.

Work Text:

It was a normal day in Quahog, Peter was talking to Lois about his newest obsession, anime. " Lois, I'm telling you we should go to Japan! That place is amazing from all the shows I've seen! And I've seen like 10. "

" I don't know Peta, this doesn't sound very affordable. "

Peter gets mad, because he loves anime and Japan. and it's his all-time dream since last week to visit. So Peter runs out of the house and breaks into Quagmire's, stealing all of his safe-money.

Peter runs back.

" See Lois? I won the lottery! "

" Well I guess that means we can go! Ni-hao! "

The griffins are on the flight from USA to Japan. Chris is so excited, he loves Ni-Hao Kai-Lan, it's his favorite show. Meg is excited to meet all the cute Japanese boys, so is Stewie.

The griffins finally arrive in Japan. They call a taxi, and ask to go to a Ramen Shop. But the driver doesn't speak english, and thinks they want to be taken to UA academy. So the taxi driver slams his breaks once they arrive and throws the griffins out of the car. Japan was neat.

Deku is walking to school, excited for another day, when he sees 5 strange foreigners and their dog. He does his best English. " Excuse him what no you doing at here? "

" What the heck is he saying? " Peter asks

" I don't know! " Lois yells back.

They hear a laugh in the distance.

" FEAR NOT, CITIZENS! " a Japanese man with a perfect American accent speaks. " I have these potions that help break language barriers " the man explains. He says some gook shit to the boy and he drinks it.

" Hello " Deku says now, and it doesn't sound like nails on a chalkboard.

" Wow! " Brian says in amazement, " that really worked! How did you invent that? " he questions.

The man laughs once again and Peter was getting jealous, he was the only one allowed with an iconic laugh here.

" My good friend and coworker Aizawa made this! You can find him in the teachers lounge if you'd like to speak with him! "

Brian wags his tail and follows the handsome blonde man's directions into the school.

" What do we do? " Meg questioned.

" You guys can tour around the school as well, why not? "

Peter laughs to assert his dominance over the other man.

" Before we go, what's your name? " Chris asks

" All Might! " he said as they handed them extra potions.

The Griffins go explore the school.

Mineta is watching Hentai in the hallways as he sees the Griffins walk in. He notices a sexy foreign lady. He smirks and puts on his best English.

" hello echexy ladee "

" what now? " Meg questions, but takes it as a compliment, she never gets those.

She handed him the potion, thinking it was a bottle of liquid viagra, Mineta took it and downed it in an instant.

" Talk again. " Meg explained

" You have very nice tits "

Meg blushed. Could this be the one? She smiled, and held her hand out.

" Let's take this to the bathroom. "

Stewie starts exploring away from the family, observing other places. He walks into a classroom and a sexy boy with bleach blonde hair is standing over him. The boy grunts in Japanese. Then starts mumbling some Japanese stuff that sounded very very rude.

Stewie smirks, he sees how it is. He's playing hard to get. Stewie pins the man down and forces him to drink the potion.

" HOW DID YOU EVEN PIN ME DOWN?! YOU'RE A BABY! "

" If the age is on the clock he's ready for the cock. "

" Heh? "

" Ugh, we'll flirt later, for now allow me to show you my weapons collection. " Stewie explains

Bakugou likes the idea of these weapons, maybe he can use something against Deku. He swallows his pride and follows the baby.

Brian was finding the teachers lounge, when he finally found the door, he opened it, and saw a very homeless looking man.

" Are you Aizawa? "

" Heh? " The man questions and Brian hands him the potion. The man realizes why Brian is here and takes it.

" Where did you get this from? " he questions.

" Some man in the streets he sounded really confident. "

Aizawa grimaces and mumbles. " All mighto... "

Peter is roaming the school, looking for a place to diarrhea. he seems a room titled 1-A " finally a goddamn bathroom! " he bursts open the door and sees like 20 kids sitting before him. The students watch in horror as the fat man walks in and starts to unbuckle his pants.

He then sees their shocked faces, and realizes this isnt some weird foreign japanese bathroom where everybody looks at each other. He pulls up his pants and decides the diarrhea has settled.

Peter drinks a potion and speaks. " Hello class, sorry for the misunderstanding, I had diarrhea. "

Iida does one of those stupid exaggerated hand movements. " It is okay sir! If you would like, I, as class rep, can show you to our bathrooms! "

" Nah I think it settled. "

" So today, " Peter explains. " I am here to teach you all English. "

Ojiro raises his hand. " Excuse me but I did not hear about this in the weekly lesson plan. "

" Shut up furry! " Peter snaps back. " We're learning English. "

Ochako grimaces. " What a scary teacher. "

" To learn English, we will watch funny American comedy movie, White Chicks "

Peter puts his copy he takes everywhere into the DVD player and the movie starts.

The kids are very confused. They cant understand anything and the fact these black men are dressing up as white girls is the only thing they can take from the plot.

" Has anybody seen Mineta and Bakugou? " Deku asked as the movie played.

" SHUT UP! NO TALKING DURING THE MOVIE! " peter scolded.

Shoto passed him a note that said " I think they called in sick "

Stewie was showing Bakugou his weapons collection, Bakugou loved all of Stewie's diverse weaponry. He took Stewie's death ray and smirked. This would definentely work to defeat Deku. " Thanks little man " he grinned and shot the wall, evilly laughing.

" You're lucky you're cute or I would have put a big warrenty on that wall. "

Meg was currently losing her virginity in the school bathroom.

Meanwhile Chris was giggling and running around in circles, Japan was so exciting! He climbed onto a pole and started spinning around on it. " WEEE! " he accidently pulled it down with his weight and crashed into the school.

Class A-1 was about to finish " White Chicks " as a fat blonde foreign man and a 10 foot pole fell right behind them into the classroom.

The class mumbled amongst themselves about this crazy day as Peter speaks up.

" Pay no mind to my son, Chris, kids. He's a bit special heheheehe. "

" I'M SPECIAL! " Chris giggled happily and ran out of the classroom.

" Sooo " Peter started, " did you guys learn any English today. "

" No. " The class replied in unison. Just as they said that the bell rang, it was time to go home.

" Finally! I can shit! " Peter said happily.

" Wait! Peter Sensei! I think you are a very dilligant teacher and I learned many things from watching funny american movie White Chicks! " Iida praised.

" Thank you young man! Now I must go release my bowels! "

The kids wait outside school for their parents to drive them home.

" Hey honey! " Deku's mom greets, " How was school? "

" We watched this weird American film about black men in the FBI "

" Sounds fun! "

" I guess it was "

" I'VE FINALLY GOT YOU CORNERED DEKU! " a voice screeches, it belonged to none other than Bakugou. Deku looked up and saw the boy holding a weird device. " NOW YOU WILL NEVER DEFEAT ME! " he shot the gun at Deku, but All Might blocked it. And Peter came out of the clasroom as well with a glowing Katana.

" There will be no fighting on school grounds, young men. " Peter explained

So Bakugou dragged Deku across the street and continued trying to shoot him. Peter smiled. " Well I see nothing wrong here! Let us go home family! "

" Sure " Stewie said. " but I'm taking my ray gun back. it wasnt even worth it, he didnt even suck my dick in return. "

Stewie used his remote to pull the ray gun back. Bakugou screams at the top of his lungs.

The family uses stewie's teleporter to head back to Quahog

Meg was crying, the only boy who would ever love her was all the way in Japan.

" That was the best trip ever! I love that playground! " Chris yelled.

" Well that's good " Peter says. " BECAUSE WE'RE GOING BACK SPRING BREAK! "

the family jumps in joy and the frame freezes

END