Work Text:
6/2/97 11:51 AM
ugh
daisys making me do this
where the hell are you
12:08 PM
she said nobodys seen you since yesterday
i dont care but like
your mom does
obviously
1:30 PM
can you at least text your mom or whatever so daisy stops asking me to play hide and seek with you
im not ten anymore
6/3/97 10:11 AM
what the hell dude
you aren’t even in your fancy ass champions quarters?
did you run away or something?
get back here dumbass youve got a region to run
i dont care but you cant just dip when youre the champion
or have you forgotten lol
6/6/97 12:04 AM
red?
red.
red where the hell are you
are you awake wherever you are?
you better text back asshole
i hate hearing your mom coming over and being upset so hurry up.
6/10/97 2:34 PM
did you know that you’ve officially been declared missing?
so you’ve got seven years before you’re technically dead
daisy stopped asking me to text you so i probably will
but if you could reply thatd make like, everyones life easier
3:04 PM
you dont have to tell me your location just be like
yea asshole im fine, or something
idrc just for your moms sake lol
7/5/97 5:25 PM
lance offered me the spot at viridian city gym
they had some elite four guy handling it while they tried to find someone new and who else but the former league champion
yknow the one that didnt vanish
(me)
2:04 AM
lance actually offered me the champion’s position first.
i said no.
thats not my position until i beat you for it
reply so i can fulfill my dreams or whatever
do you want me to say the magic word or something? lol
4:04 AM
please
1/1/98 12:00 AM
happy new year
2/27/98 7:30 AM
happy birthday
youd be turning 12 in case you forgot
arent phone numbers supposed to be disabled or something when shit like this happens?
thats why i bet youre alive
if you are alive, youre the biggest asshole ive ever met
3/1/98 3:12 AM
i dont want to get up and go to the gym
i cant sleep.
im gonna be tired as hell.
5:01 AM
it shouldve been you
im no good at this.
2/27/99 12:00 AM
happy 13th birthday
you’re now officially a teenager
officially a teenager and missing for almost 3 years
yknow they call it golden years for a reason dumbass
its cause you arent supposed to waste them
5/2/99 4:45 PM
this shift is so fucking long.
look i changed my mind, dont reply to me
ive said so much embarrassing shit already
just text your mom instead
shes the one who actually misses you
6/2/99 2:11 PM
yknow a normal asshole wouldve forgotten about you by now
everyone else has, actually
but here i am
texting you on my break
even though you’ll never reply
i guess
7/16/99 6:10 PM
me and leaf are good friends now
i had lunch with her today
you used to be her best friend
look im trying to make you jealous so you come back
because she misses you a lot i can tell
so text back
for leaf’s sake i mean
1/1/00 12:02 AM
woohoo it’s the 2000s
and none of the pokeballs broke like everyone said they would
if you know shit about coding its obvious
2:52 AM
i beat a kid today in the gym and he cried
what am i supposed to do in that situation???
and why the hell am i asking someone who will never reply?
3:00 AM
new years resolution: im not texting you all year
im just getting a diary like a normal person
1/1/01 4:55 AM
there, i did it.
did you hear about the new johto champion?
he turned 10 in december and absolutely swept through the gyms like it was nothing
rumor has it he’s coming after the kanto circuit
you should fight him at some point.
1/14/01 3:05 PM
he fucking OBLITERATED me.
holy shit.
1/16/01 9:34 AM
really long story, but gold’s staying at my place
cause there’s a hurricane and he’s missing his ship home
dont ask why he came to ME.
he’s a weird kid
10:52 AM
red, he reminds me of you.
he’s got the whole ‘gotta do it’ look to him
and he carries a noctowl around on his shoulder
difference: he never shuts up.
2/2/01 4:31 AM
im just
sorry
im sorry.
im sorry red
im sorry for everything
now please just tell me youre not dead
2/5/01 1:11 AM
is it because of me?
am i the reason you left?
1:57 AM
did you kill yourself?
thats the reason everyone seems to be settling on.
if im the reason behind that
you realize thats gonna fuck me up right
so tell me it isnt.
2:03 AM
please.
what do you want from me
are you trying to teach me a lesson?
seems like the kind of thing you’d do
but for five years???
you better just be a huge asshole dragging on the world’s worst joke
so i can punch you when i see you again
2:33 AM
you notice how i keep texting you late?
here’s the big fun reason why:
i keep having weird dreams
are you haunting my dreams asshole.
4:53 AM
i miss you. (! Not Delivered)
2/7/01 10:42 PM
i met some of gold’s friends today
he has one named silver (didnt catch his real name) whos kind of like me but more edgy
he has a sister too named lyra, trainer name’s crystal
gold’s real name is ethan but he hates it
they’re good kids
leaf said that i treat gold weirdly nice, considering im
me.
11:20 PM
it’s cause gold is my second try.
2/27/01 6:30 AM
happy 15th birthday.
7:30 AM
this is awkward and out of the blue but
arent i supposed to like get crushes at this age?
i cannot BELIEVE i am asking you of all people but
girls are just the same old girls to me
dont really see the hype, to be honest.
3/15/01 2:01 PM
i guess i have a crush on leaf
because i like hanging out with her and the idea of her going to unova kind of scares the crap out of me
yeah, she’s going to unova to study abroad
but how do i tell between friend and crush?
like, going out to lunch with her is basically the only thing that makes me happy
but the idea of like…kissing her…
that’s weird as hell!
i dont WANT to do that
so then i just want to be her friend, right???
how the hell am i supposed to know?
3/16/01 3:11 AM
this is embarrassing
im scared for her to leave like im a little kid or something
red if she leaves i have NO FRIENDS
if she leaves its just me and this screen full of my own texts looking back at me
gold’s back in johto
you’re who knows where
fuck.
is it bad that i cant do this alone
am i the biggest wuss for being afraid of the dark or what.
3:31 AM
it just hit me that i referred to you as a friend despite not seeing you since 1997.
thats when i know i’ve hit rock bottom lmao
3:34 AM
dude if anyone sees these texts i’ll literally DIE of embarrassment.
3/25/01 8:45 PM
red iid id ssomethng realy stupid
imf ucking BLEEIDNG
holy shitttt
imsjtu gonna sit her and bleeed out stil my phone battery dies!!!!
3/26/01 9:00 AM
sorry for that debacle.
if you happen to be alive and reading this and deathly concerned for the asshole who bullied you your whole life
im fine
physically
i just did something stupid is all.
too bad springs coming up and i gotta wear long sleeves all the fuckin time now
im so stupid.
4/19/01 4:51 PM
leaf found out.
shes here on spring vacation
we went out for lunch
gave me some bullshit about trying to read my palm like she learned in unova before pulling my sleeve down.
i dont know what to do.
i really, really dont know what to do.
shes gonna treat me like a nutcase now.
she started crying and everything.
i haven’t seen leaf cry since we were kids
and it was a little terrifying.
11/5/01 7:21 PM
so
long story short.
started seeing a therapist or whatever
im not gonna be stupid and prideful and say i dont need one when i know their job is to help but
i still feel embarrassed.
basically
they connected my parents leaving and leaf leaving and
you
leaving
yeah red apparently im fucked up over you
is it okay to tell you that?
i feel like its not okay to tell someone that.
who knows if its even true or not, its just what my therapist told me.
i just dont mean to make you feel guilty.
8:04 PM
who am i kidding.
you’re dead.
8:11 PM
i told her about these texts, kind of because i had nothing else to say
her meaning my therapist i mean.
and she JUMPED on this
coping mechanisms and shit
she didnt ask to read them but i feel like she will
i just told her i use you as like a diary
im NOT showing her these by the way
i dont remember half the shit i said in here but i bet its not pretty.
1/1/02 1:01 AM
red.
new years resolution + therapists advice: think about something about myself that makes me uncomfortable
thats obviously not what she told me to do, just what i heard it as.
yknow something Deep.
okay, well its kind of arbitrary but im still wondering why i dont have crushes
on girls.
the problem is that
i might have crushes
on people
who are
NOT girls
1:21 AM
even knowing you’re not going to reply i still flinch every time i open the text app.
okay, finishing that thought
i may have crushes on people who are
guys
1:25
how are you supposed to KNOW?
like, i always read that if you’re gay you Just Know.
but i DONT Just Know.
i dont want to talk to anyone else about this, even if i had someone other than leaf or my therapist.
i want to hear your opinion.
i ALWAYS want to hear your opinion.
i didnt back then but now i just wish i could hear what you think of all this
you were the right one all along, weren’t you???
but i cant.
because you’re probably dead.
2:11
oh god, it just hit me.
what if like, you’re alive and you just LOST YOUR PHONE??
how come i’ve NEVER thought this??
what if someone finds your phone and sees this?
like, this is shallow as hell but these texts getting leaked would NOT be good for me.
2:17
see this is why i want you here
you never gave a shit about publicity.
actually, maybe your phone’s dead?
well, you’ve got pikachu to charge it.
maybe youre just dead and im a wishfully thinking asshole.
like always.
2/27/02, 12:10 AM
happy 16th birthday
i have a crush on you.
there.
had.
i have had a crush on you probably since we met.
and i miss you.
im getting a new phone soon so if you reply and i dont see it i will rethink my crush
12:45 AM
you know how i knew?
even though the evidence overwhelmingly points to you being dead
and if you WEREN’T dead, you would be being silent to me basically pouring my whole gay heart out for you
which would make you a huge dick
even despite all that i text you anyway.
and even though i’ve had other friends over my journey i’ve lost contact with
you’re the only one i cant get out of my head.
you’re the one it all comes back to.
you’re the one that i think of when i want to go home.
12:51
did i really just type that?
12:59
red, i love you. please, just this once, respond.
2/28/02, 7:00 AM
From: Red
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