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Emotions. How difficult it was to decipher what a real emotion meant. People were always easy to read, but Shikishima Ritsu still had many things to learn about his own feelings. The memories of his past were all scrambled up. Distorted, one could even say, but even if the happiness that he felt on this world was mostly made up, the bonds and relationships that he had created were the most real thing in this tiny world.
Even so, he feared. He feared how little did he truly knew about himself. What were his old ideals? What were his old truths? What if the person that he used to be disgusted himself so much that he forced himself to forget everything? All the theories were plausible, but the stigma on his own ideas tried to drag him down again.
Fear was relative, after all. Everyone feared something, everyone in the Mobius got hurt by something but… his case was different.
It was easy to fake a smile, to tell his friends that he was okay was something that even them used to do with him. But it seemed like one person always noticed when he got lost on his own thoughts.
"Are you okay? You seemed a little pale" a deep voice asked, and its owner was staring directly at Ritsu. Without notice, the dark haired philosopher had started taking deep breaths, probably thanks to the same anxiety that had started invading him. "I-It’s… alright" he answered, trying to compose himself once again, surrounding himself with his own arms in a hug. Even so, the touch of a reassuring hand on his shoulder seemed to help even more.
Shogo Satake wasn’t good with emotions, just like Ritsu, but the main difference is that even if the emotions hurt him, he accepted them. The good, the bad, even the worse feelings just seemed to remind him about a fact that was still hard to accept: he was alive. And even if he didn’t liked them, the emotions were his own reminder about the mistake he made.
Still… he knew how much his own thoughts could hurt.
A loud sigh escaped from his lips. The sight of his own friend suffering like that made his stomach squirm in a weird kind of pain. He was used to watch his other companions battle with their own demons before… but why was it so painful to watch Ritsu suffer like that? Without thinking too much about it, Shogo cut out the distance between them and embraced the other one in a tight hug. It was… awkward, of course, Shogo was already regretting his “stupid” decision but… then he felt something else. The distance between them was shortened more when Ritsu pressed his body towards him, while his arms hugged him too, corresponding the gesture. A gentle smile was now placed on Ritsu’s lips, while his eyes looked right at the other man. "Thank you… Many people say that a hug always helps when you feel sad, but usually those so called embraces never happen. In this case… It was a nice surprise" he said shortly with a little laugh.
Hopefully, the blush on Shogo’s face after hearing his words wasn’t as visible as he thought. And hopefully… Ritsu doubted it a little bit, but maybe the smile he had on his own face was actually as real.
Maybe as real as that small happiness that both of them shared in that moment.