Work Text:
Jeongguk watched quietly as Yoongi shoved the last bits in his backpack, the rest of his room devoid of life, faded markings on the wall showing where posters and pictures used to be, the largest items all that remained. An ache settled in his chest at the sight of the empty desk – the new homeowner had wanted to keep it –, Yoongi’s laptop already packed away along with his notebooks and pens. Even the bed wasn’t the same, no longer covered by the admittedly uncomfortable mattress, which was one of the few things Yoongi was taking with him for inexplicable reasons.
The sun caught Yoongi’s hair and made it look more brown than black. Jeongguk swallowed at the sight. He was being silly, he knew: this wasn’t the end of the world. Yet it felt like it. Yoongi was going to Osaka, as his dad had found a new job there and the entire Min family was moving over to Japan. Yoongi had promised to visit during the holidays, and he had already made Jeongguk swear he would come over as soon as possible so he could show him around.
But it wouldn’t be the same.
Yoongi’s family had moved to Busan when Yoongi had been thirteen years old, Jeongguk having just turned twelve. Their fathers were colleagues and the families had met up frequently, with Yoongi and Jeongguk quickly becoming friends. Then best friends. They had had sleepovers later on and even just last night they had watched some Marvel movies on Yoongi’s laptop, curled up on top of a pile of blankets and pretending they weren’t surrounded by boxes and empty cupboards and drawers, pretending it was the same as any other weekend, when they’d stay up all night to play videogames or just talk, because Yoongi always had so much to say, especially when it was just the two of them.
Although Jeongguk had known they wouldn’t live near each other forever (in fact, had Yoongi not made this move, he would have been packing up for Seoul to go to college there), he still wasn’t ready. This was Yoongi, who had always treated him as something precious, who had always looked after him almost better than Jeongguk’s own brother did. He recalled the time his mother had cut his hair slightly too short and the other kids had made fun of him, until Yoongi had stepped in with his sharp tongue and shut them up, treating Jeongguk to ice cream later and assuring him he looked ‘just fine, honestly, Kookie, they’re not worth your time’. Or the time a distressed Yoongi had sat right there at that desk, wringing his hands, his eyes shifty, when he had confessed to Jeongguk that he liked a boy and he really hoped this wouldn’t affect the way Jeongguk looked at him. It hadn’t, of course, and at some point he had even taught a nervous Jeongguk how to kiss when the younger had lied about someone making fun of his skills (a lie because he had never kissed anyone before).
He had considered telling Yoongi, but had ultimately decided against it. What good would that knowledge do? It wasn’t as though Yoongi could cancel his plans if he felt the same way, and if he didn’t, it would only ease the process of drifting apart, something he was terrified of happening as it were. It was an unnecessary burden. Of course he could regret not saying anything, and he knew very well that long distance was a possibility, but... He heard Yoongi mumble under his breath as he seemed to be ticking off a mental list, his lips pursed into that pout he’d often get, eyebrows furrowed pensively, his long, thin fingers drumming on the desk.
It just wasn’t worth it.
Perhaps one day he’d see Yoongi in his new home and he’d tell him then, blurt out all his feelings, and perhaps Yoongi wouldn’t have met someone else by then and would even accept and return his love. Perhaps he could apply for college in Osaka, or perhaps Yoongi would return to Korea and, if not to Busan, he’d go to Seoul and they’d at least be in the same country. Perhaps one day they could make things work. One day. Some day.
A sigh broke through his thoughts and he looked up to see Yoongi stretching his back, his bag now closed and bulging. Quickly, he scrambled up from the floor, his heart pounding and his head feeling woozy at the realisation that this was it. In a few moments, they’d walk down the stairs (he remembered how they had once slid down them on Yoongi’s mattress – only once, as they’d miscalculated and Yoongi had hit the wall and broken his arm; Jeongguk didn’t think he’d ever been that terrified in his life, except right now), out the front door (which he had slammed behind him after a ridiculous fight years ago, Yoongi soon showing up on his doorstep to apologise, never asking for an apology in return), and then they’d get in the car and head off to the airport. Jeongguk had wanted to come along, but their parents had agreed it would be too chaotic and it was honestly better to just say their goodbyes at home. If you asked Jeongguk, they should never say goodbye, but he had begrudgingly agreed in the end.
“That’s everything, I think,” Yoongi murmured, eyes flickering across the room, the look in them both fond and pained and Jeongguk wondered what was going through his mind. Was he, too, reminiscing about the time Yoongi had been grounded and Jeongguk had snuck in through the window to see him, or the time they had gotten ready for a friend’s Halloween party here (Jeongguk had been a bunny, Yoongi a cat – he wasn’t sure he had ever been entirely forgiven for making Yoongi wear the costume, but he had looked adorable so Jeongguk didn’t even care), or the first time they had tried alcohol, Jeongguk giggling his ass off and Yoongi shushing him continuously? Incidentally, that had been his second kiss, though neither of them had ever brought it up afterwards and Jeongguk wasn’t even sure Yoongi remembered.
Jeongguk nodded, throat feeling too tight to speak. He shoved his hands in his pockets in a semblance of nonchalance and swallowed again, hard, reminding himself that he couldn’t possibly let Yoongi leave without even speaking. “If there’s still anything at mine…”
“It can stay there until I come see you.” Yoongi offered him a soft smile. “Okay?”
Jeongguk nodded, suddenly desperately hoping Yoongi had indeed forgotten something, that he’d left a little part of himself, however insignificant, with Jeongguk. Silly, silly, silly. They had phones, webcams on their laptops, and tonight Yoongi would message him and take him on a virtual tour of his new room, his new home, complain about the long journey and how he needed to unpack. And maybe about how much he missed Jeongguk and wished they could go explore together. This wasn’t the end of anything.
Slowly, scowling, Yoongi picked up his bag and shoved his arms through the straps, looking positively tiny with the giant thing on his back. Jeongguk couldn’t help but grin, even when Yoongi pointed at him with a warning glare.
“’m gonna miss you,” Jeongguk suddenly blurted out, keeping in everything else. He flushed, but kept his eyes on Yoongi’s stubbornly, seeing them soften.
“I’ll miss you too, Kookie. It will be weird, not having you around all the time.” He hesitated, as though he wanted to say something more, but instead he awkwardly placed his bag on the floor once more and shuffled closer. “Can’t give you a proper hug otherwise,” he explained with a shrug, even though Jeongguk hadn’t asked. He glanced down at Jeongguk’s chest as he held his arms open, raising an eyebrow when Jeongguk didn’t promptly move as if to say ‘well?’, and how could Jeongguk not comply?
He melted into his friend’s arms, feeling them squeeze his waist, his own arms draping over Yoongi’s shoulders. Despite the awkward angle, he buried his face in Yoongi’s neck and inhaled deeply, his eyes closed, trying to memorise Yoongi’s earthy scent, the sound of his breathing, the warmth of his body. He had no idea how long they had simply stood there by the time Yoongi’s parents called up to them to hurry, as they needed to leave. All he knew was that it hadn’t been long enough and it was with great reluctance that he let go.
Yoongi’s gaze was tender, his smile sweet. “I’ll see you again soon, alright?” he promised.
Jeongguk nodded, to which Yoongi turned away to grab his backpack again, groaning at its weight. He followed him out the room, that ache returning as he realised that this would be his last time here, that soon someone else would be living here, would decorate this room until it would look as though Min Yoongi had never even set a foot inside. So lost in his thoughts, he nearly bumped into his friend when he unexpectedly stopped walking.
Jeongguk blinked when Yoongi turned around. “Hyung?”
Yoongi licked his lips and looked into Jeongguk’s eyes. “Forgot something.”
Jeongguk was about to step aside when he felt a hand curl around the back of his neck and tug him down, followed by soft, familiar lips against his own. After the initial shock and unsure what was actually happening right now and oh god, shouldn’t they talk about this, Jeongguk kissed back eagerly, Yoongi making a noise that could be a chuckle or a groan, or maybe both. He clutched at Yoongi’s shirt, confused yet wanting more, and licked at Yoongi’s lips carefully, moaning softly when their tongues touched.
Another shout from downstairs made them break the kiss, though they remained close enough for Yoongi’s breath to hit his face. Slightly dizzy, Jeongguk stared into Yoongi’s dark eyes, even darker now. “I…”
“Maybe… we could continue this next time?” Yoongi suggested, his voice a fraction deeper than usual and making a shudder run down Jeongguk’s spine. “When we see each other again? If you want?”
Aware that his eyes must be the widest they’d ever been, Jeongguk opened and closed his mouth several times. “Wait, what just happened?” he finally asked, still dazed. What did this mean?
“I think you know, bun,” Yoongi murmured, tugging on Jeongguk’s hair gently before letting go and stepping back, reluctance clear in every movement that took him further away. “I know the timing’s off, but we could make this work, right? We could talk tonight? Figure it out?”
“I don’t know if I want to punch you or kiss you,” Jeongguk admitted before he could stop himself. God, this wasn’t just bad timing, this was the worst timing ever, and he couldn’t believe-
He couldn’t believe how happy he nonetheless was.