Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

1.

“How do we continue to fight Thanos?”

“We don’t.”

Everyone looked at Loki in shock but he just shrugged still looking out of the window. For him, it was a fairly simple concept, just one difficult to accomplish. They didn’t exactly have the resources to do such a thing, and even with his knowledge, it was impossible, not without a power source, something to stabilize them.

“I beg your pardon, Merlin?” Stark snarled, already angry.

Loki could understand, the man had just lost his son, and that death had left him shaken and devastated. He had been quick to explode, snarky and nearly impossible to talk to, and Loki had definitely noticed the tension between him and Captain Rogers. It wasn’t his problem or business, but they all needed to work together fairly well.

“Captain Rogers asked how can we continue, which implies a future. My response and the truth is, that there is no future in front of us. Truly, there is absolutely nothing we can do now, to continue fighting as we are,” Loki explained patiently and raised a hand when they tried to talk. “Future does not lay in our interests. The past, however…”

Thor lit up and sent Loki a sharp look.

“You referring to what we talked about,” he realized and shrugged when others looked at them questioningly. “Loki believes, well, we both believe that we need to go back, to actually achieve something.”

Stark raised an eyebrow and Loki could swear something started to clear in his eyes.

“We don’t have the Time Stone,” Rogers mentioned, resigned and angry.

His anger was dangerous because he suffered in silence, boiling inside and Loki didn’t feel like trusting him, not even a little. Well, he didn’t trust anyone aside from Thor, but he wasn’t willing to give him an important task, even though it would probably come to it. Rogers was...valuable, but too unpredictable as of late.

“An astute observation, Captain Rogers,” Loki snarled, making Thor scoff at him. “If we had a Time Stone there would be no problem. I know how to use it, and it would be easy to turn the time back, to before Thanos had gotten the first Stone. I trust you can understand why we are even talking about this. We do not have any Stones and it is quite impossible to get any of them, not now.”

Therein laid the problem. Yes, he and Thor had talked about the Time Stone, but it had always been a lost cause. There was no real way of getting their hands on it, not when Thanos had all of them. They were stuck in a conundrum because there was no way of getting the Time Stone from Thanos, but going back in time was the only way of stopping him. “But we can't get the Stone, so we're back in the beginning,” Romanoff noticed, making Loki sigh deeply, deflating slightly.

There was a spell, one capable of sending the user back in time, but it wouldn't work for him and no one else knew it or had enough power to actually use it. This was a closed circle and Loki hated it. Hated how he'd come such a long way to come back to Thor, only to be stopped by their inability to move forward. Or back, in their case.

“Maybe I can help,” Stark said suddenly, making everyone look at him and causing Loki to perk up. “Back in the day, I was…looking for a way to stop myself from making some of the mistakes I've made in the past. I have something, not much, but something that theoretically would be capable of taking is back in time.”

Loki raised an eyebrow and Shuri slid a bit closer, a curious fire suddenly appearing in her eyes. She looked more alive, almost vibrating with excitement and Loki could sort of understand that. He was better at hiding it, but he was equally as excited.

“Why didn't you say anything before?” Rogers snarled, eyes angry and wide.

Loki stood up before he could do anything and stepped in front of Stark, keeping his eyes on the Captain. The man was getting more and more dangerous and unpredictable and Loki didn't like it one bit. From the corner of his eye, he could see Thor straightening himself, clearly seeing the same. A warrior's grief was powerful and it could overwhelm some, making them willing to do anything to bring their loved ones back. It was dangerous.

“Calm down, Captain,” Loki ordered quietly, his voice cold and hard. “I do not know what you lost to Thanos, but I can assure you that you were not the only one. There is nothing special about your situation and there is no explanation why you're attacking a person who may be capable of getting us where we want to be.”

It was crazy, really, how he actually cared enough to get up, but there was something about Rogers rubbing him the wrong way. It was easy to notice the tension between him and Stark, but Loki wasn't willing to allow it to destroy their mission. Rogers had no reason to act in such ways and Loki wouldn't allow that anymore.

“I advise you to calm down and stop acting without thinking Captain, or there will be consequences. We need to work together and I will do anything to make sure that happens.”

For a moment, the whole room was almost crackling with tension before Rogers deflated and nodded quietly. It was strange, seeing the man so docile and quiet but Loki knew he could cut an intimidating figure when he wished to. It seemed like he was the one calling the shots now.

Loki allowed himself a small smirk, satisfied with how things were proceeding before he turned back to Stark and raised an eyebrow.

“I need to look at this device, whatever it is, along with all of the schemes and equations. I need everything,” he stressed and the King stood up, her eyes still full of curiosity and fire.

“Bring it here,” she ordered hotly. “We have technology so advanced it should be easy to improve it.”

Loki smirked at the excited, but trying to cover it, girl and nodded. It was a good plan and if he could find a way to thread his seiðr into it… This could actually work, but he had no way of knowing until he actually saw the device and plans.

“Looks like we're visiting New York,” Stark announced, sending Loki knowing look.

The god only smirked and nodded. This was exciting.

2.

The tower was different from what Loki remembered, but its been 6 years. A lot of things could change in 6 years, he knew that well. He looked around with curiosity but didn't stop to admire anything, they didn't have time. Or maybe, they had all the time in the world. Thor was trailing him the whole time, staying close enough that they brushed against each other from time to time. Loki didn't say anything, just stepped a bit closer and smiled at him from time to time. Thor was clearly still shaken and it surprised Loki, the depth of the feelings his brother had for him. To grieve so much and he so broken… He glanced at his brother and gently poked him, making Thor smile. It was ridiculous but Loki couldn't stop.

Finally, they entered the workshop and he took everything with wide eyes. Through the years, Loki had seen his fair share of labs and workshops, some of them made by variously amazingly advanced races, but it was still amazing. Stark didn't have much to work with, but he was clearly a few decades ahead of Earth's technology. It was actually impressive.

He looked around carefully, sending his seiðr to sense the whole place and it was obvious that Stark was creating great things there. Loki could feel a faint echo of an Infinity Stone there but it was long gone. Something had probably happened there a few years ago, but now it didn't matter.

“These are the plans,” Stark said pulling up a hologram of numbers and schemes. Loki walked closer and focused on it as Stark set up to search for the device itself. It had potential, he could see it, but there were many things missing. Stark was ahead of his race but it wasn't quite enough for what he was trying to accomplish. Though, Loki suspected that if he had appropriate resources and knowledge, his idea had a chance of coming true. Loki only hoped that Wakanda and his magic would be enough.

“We need time, but I suspect that with Wakanda’s technology, my magic and knowledge and your ideas we should be able to accomplish this,” Loki announced and Stark allowed himself a little smile.

Thor walked closer and pressed himself against Loki again, a wide smile on his face.

“I don't doubt you can make it, brother,” he said with pride in his voice.

Thor’s faith in him was…maybe not humbling but certainly gave Loki a bust. There was a lot of work and failed attempts in front of them, but they had a chance. Though Loki knew that even if they managed to get back in time the fight would only begin but for the first time since Thanos killed his people, Loki felt hopeful.

“Now we only need to get back to Wakanda with this thing,” Stark muttered, looking at the device.

Loki glanced at it and twitched his fingers, making the whole thing disappear in a hue of green seiðr. Stark flinched and looked at him but he only smirked.

“Work smarter, not harder, Stark.”

3.

Thor was waiting for him when Loki walked down the halls, to where Shuri’s lab was. He was prepared to be quite amazed, especially by the young girl that he couldn't help but feel protective over. His head was already brimming with ideas and seeing Thor made him stop in place.

His brother was smiling at him hesitantly so Loki came closer. As he did, Thor laid a gentle, strong hand on his neck, the gesture so familiar, and pulled them closer. Loki raised an eyebrow but complain, allowing the contact, one of his hands coming up to rest on Thor’s bicep, the other on his waist.

“What is it, brother?” he asked quietly, staring at Thor, who had his eyes closed. It was quite obvious that something was bothering Thor and Loki absolutely hated not knowing. Especially as Thor’s emotions had proved to be quite explosive. Yet, this time it seemed as if that wasn't the case.

“I'm reluctant to let you out of my sight,” Thor admitted, his voice a mere whisper, shy and hesitant. “I'm aware it's illogical but I can't… I'm afraid.”

Loki could see how much that admission cost his brother and he sighed quietly, pulling Thor into his body. He allowed his seiðr to envelop them both, warm and soothing, the same he had used back when they'd been children and Thor couldn't sleep. It was an instinct, to soothe his brother, once Loki let himself really care. Astonishing, how much changed just because he allowed himself that freedom.

“Maybe you are right to fear, in the light of recent events, and everything that has happened between us. But if you cannot trust yourself, trust me and my ability to keep myself safe,” Loki said, his voice uncharacteristically gentle. “Trust my promise. It will be here forever.”

Thor pulled away to look him in the eyes, the love in them almost overwhelming Loki, so he smirked and kissed him. His brother quickly wrapped him in his arms and they stood there, kissing quietly, assuring each other that it was real, finally. They were both scarred and a bit broken but Loki felt as if there was nowhere he'd rather be. And his promise to Thor didn't have an expiration date.

He pulled away slowly, unhappy yet aware that he had things to do.

“Go now, brother and teach the mortals some manners. They've been awfully rude,” Loki snickered, making Thor roll his eyes but leave.

He watched his back for a moment, before continuing to the lab, where Shuri and Stark were already waiting. Loki nodded at them and immediately walked to the table where the schemes and plans were displayed in a hologram.

“We need a solid control system,” Loki announced, his mind already spinning all the possibilities. “The idea is good but we need more, we need something more stable and predictable. If it goes wrong, we'll end up squashed by the sheer fibre of the universe.”

Both of the scientists nodded and glanced at the plans.

“What about a power source?” Stark asked suddenly and Shuri immediately picked that thought up.

“Exactly! We need something to power it up and well, even Stark’s reactor won't be enough,” she noticed, treating the older man as her coworker. Loki really liked her.

“I'll be the power source,” he announced, making them both snort. “We don't actually have the technology to create both the steering system and an easily controlled power source. It's one thing or another and I'm strong enough to carry it out.”

It would require an astonishing amount of power, Loki knew and he'd have to take most of what the Stone gave him, to thread it with his own seiðr. There was a reason why no one really tried to travel back in time without the Stone. It was incredibly hard.

“It'll exhaust me, most probably, but I'm counting on having one of the Stones back in the past. I'll use it to back myself up.”

They hadn't talked about when they were travelling to, but Loki suspected they all agreed. It had all started with his ‘invasion’ on Earth and it was the best moment. They had two of the Stones then, and Thanos had none. That was their chance.

“You'll have to explain that one, but we'll cross that bridge once we encounter it,” Stark sighed, dejected. It couldn't be easy, accepting that there was more than science to the world and Loki took great delight in reminding Stark that. But that wasn't the time to dwell on that, they had a lot of work to do.

And, contrary to any logic, not a lot of time.

4.

Loki was exhausted when he entered his and Thor’s rooms. It's been almost 2 weeks and they were making progress, but it was slow. No one had really tried to make a time machine before so they were all running on their own ideas, with nothing to back them up. It was a beautiful hybrid of technology and magic, but it wasn't easy to create something that complicated with no real way of testing or checking.

Thor was already inside, laying on the bed, clearly fresh from the shower. Loki let his eyes wander over his strong, scarred body but he was too tired and tense to even think anything of it. He undressed on his way to the shower and only under the water did he allow himself to relax a bit.

He wasn't sure why there was this weird tension in the air, the desperate desire to finish as soon as possible. The universe had already ended, as weird as said end hand been, and it felt a bit as if there was nothing to be done. Yet, the universe was calling to Loki, rushing him, rushing them all and he could tell that Shuri and Stark felt it too. It was irking him, truly, because he didn't know why there was this tension. It'd didn't make any sense.

Loki towelled himself dry, his mind spinning in circles and exited the bathroom clad only in his underwear. He collapsed on the bed gracefully, pushing himself closer to Thor’s warmth and sighed deeply, relaxing when his brother wrapped an arm around him.

“How is the progress?” Thor asked, actually curious for once.

“Slow. Unsure. Too slow.”

“You also feel that push,” his brother concluded and Loki wasn't even surprised.

There was something heavy in the air and he didn't like it one bit. Something was coming, something bad, even worse than what had already happened and that was a bad sign in itself.

“I cannot really explain it,” Loki huffed, irritated. “Yet I am constantly pushed to be quicker, to finish faster. It's maddening.”

“Yes, you don't like being kept in the dark,” Thor chuckled, though it lacked its usual humour.

“And you do?” Loki raised an eyebrow, raising himself on his elbow.

Laying on Thor’s chest was comfortable and warm, but it seemed as if they both wanted to talk a bit. He didn't mind, not when Thor was looking up at him with wide blue eyes, one hand on his hip.

“There are so many unknowns in this situation, we cannot control most of them. I dislike being in such state.”

Thor hummed and turned his head to press a small kiss to Loki’s shoulder breathing in his scent. They were both still getting used to this closeness and being open to each other, but Loki thought they were doing remarkably well. With their track record, he had been expecting more awkwardness and hiding away, instead of talking in bed quietly. He didn't mind, though, not one bit.

“There is something in the air, I can also tell. I hate to push you, but we are running out of time, ironically. We are not strong enough to face a powerful enemy now,” Thor remarked, once again reminding Loki how much his brother had grown up.

“I'm aware and we are working as fast as we can. It isn't easy but I love a good challenge. Just…in less dire situation.”

He was good at working under pressure but this one was a bit suffocating. His companions also left it but neither of them could explain it, as they didn't have such connection to the tissue of the universe as Loki did. They were getting more and more stressed but progress was being made.

“How soon until you finish?” Thor asked and for once his voice wasn't irritated or annoyed, just worried.

“Maybe a week and maybe a month,” Loki sighed, dejected. He wasn't easily discouraged but everything was going slowly, too slowly for him. “There aren't many spells about time, it's not something sorcerers are willing to do. The price is too high.”

Thor looked at him in understanding and Loki slid back down, curling on his brother's chest. The low sound of his heartbeat was soothing and when Thor started to run his hand up and down his back, Loki finally relaxed. He wasn't ready to sleep yet, but he could enjoy this quiet moment.

“Do you have a plan?” Thor asked suddenly. “For when we're back in the past… Do you have anything planned?”

If someone else had asked, Loki would certainly say that he did, with a wicked smirk and mysterious eyes. But this was Thor and Loki…Loki actually trusted him. Maybe not fully, not yet, but it was easier with every passing day, to actually rely on his brother.

“I don't,” he admitted with a heavy heart, closing his eyes. “There are so many unknown and I've never actually gone back in time, nor do I know anyone that had. This isn't…This isn't just a little change like Thanos or the Stonekeeper had used before. We cannot be sure of anything.”

“We need the stones,” Thor stated and Loki stopped himself from snorting. If only it was this easy. “And say we get the stones, all of them. What then?”

Good question. He wasn't sure, didn't have a firm plan, any real vision. They couldn't go back to their own time with them, at least he didn't think so. The universe probably wouldn't survive it.

“We'll need to change everything,” Loki said with a heavy sigh. “For now, my plan is to get the Stones, find Thanos, kill him, hide the Stones somewhere only we know, and let everything play out. Go back to our own time, find out what had been changed, find the Stones and keep them safe.”

It was more of a wish than a plan, but better that than nothing. Loki really didn't have any way to predict what may happen and it infuriated him. He had always been the one to control what was happening, spin his world, and now it was all unknown. They were all hoping for the best.

“We're at the point, where almost everything is better than what happened.”

Thor only hummed in reply and squeezed him closer.

“Who will go? Aside from you and me, I mean.”

“We need Stark,” Loki answered immediately. “He's smart and fast and he'll be the one to convince 2012 Stark to help us. Aside from that, Romanoff would be useful, but I'm still unsure how many people I can safely take there and get back.”

Loki was also thinking of Rogers. The man was infuriating and arrogant, but he was useful in making others do what he wanted. The charm of the national celebrity, Loki guessed.

They stayed silent after that, but it was easy to tell that Thor wanted to say something. His hands tightened just a bit on Loki’s body and he only smiled, letting his brother talk.

“Why not earlier?” he asked finally. “Why not go back to before my cursed coronation, tell your other self who he really is, avoid this whole mess, suffering?”

Thor’s voice cracked at the end and Loki pushed himself up again with a sigh. Firmly, he grabbed his brother's chin and made the man look at him, his own emerald eyes blazing.

“I'm touched that you want to spare me everything that had happened, but I'm afraid it's not wise for several reasons,” Loki muttered, his thumb caressing Thor’s jaw. “Besides the fact that our past shaped us into who we are now, the time of my infamous invasion is the best to act. There are two Infinity Stones on Earth, both of which are in my possession, Thanos is half the universe away from Earth and the Power Stone is still safely hidden in the ruins. This is our best chance.”

Loki had thought how it would be, to exist without those terrible memories, to sleep undisturbed by nightmares of his time with Thanos, but it wasn't practical. They could change too much because he didn't want to destroy who they were as people.

“We'll change a lot anyway, but there are limits, that I do not want to cross. Even if the price is my suffering.”

Thor made a small, wounded sound and curled up around him, his big body almost squishing Loki. He only chuckled and let his brother do as he wished, actually warm and quite comfortable.

“I hate myself for being so blind and stupid,” Thor muttered until his neck, nor yet crying but close. “For not seeing what had been so obvious. For hurting you like that.”

He let out a long sigh and carefully pet his brother's short hair, thinking it over.

“I hated you for a while, because of that,” Loki said bluntly and Thor let out another broken whimper. “That does not mean I didn't love you, but I also hated you. You were stupid and blind, that is true but you were willing to even forgive me, while not knowing it wasn't really me. I knew, even then, that you loved me back, even if your pride and limited view made you insufferable.”

That wasn't maybe the best speech to make Thor feel better but it was honest,  more honest than Loki had been in a while and that was what counted. He let his brother slowly calm down, even though he wasn't crying and continued to pet his hair, his seiðr following his moves.

“I shall shake my younger self awake,” Thor decided angrily. “I shall tell him what a blind moron he was being, what his mistakes will cost him. I will make a difference, brother.”

Loki nodded silently before smirking, deciding to lighten the mood. He grabbed Thor’s him in his fingers and raised his face so that they were looking at each other.

“This is the beauty of this plan, brother. We can go there and show those stupid, young boys what they're missing because of their pride and blindness. We can do anything,” he whispered mischievously, eyes jumping.

Thor slowly started to smile, before he too was beaming at him, his eyes full of mirth that Loki was proud of.

“Does that mean you will not mind if I show you affection with others present?” he asked, already excited and Loki nodded.

“Please, be my guest. It would be no good if I was the only affectionate one.”

Maybe everything wasn't alright and they still didn't know what exactly they were going to do, but it was easier to fall asleep with Thor’s laughter still echoing in Loki’s ears.

5.

Thor watched with worry, as his brother grew more and more restless, coming back to their rooms later into the night as the days went by. He could understand the hurry, as he also felt that invading pressure, but that didn’t mean he liked seeing Loki so stressed and tired. They were gods, therefore it wasn’t very noticeable, but Thor knew his brother and he could tell what it meant when he grew snappy and easily annoyed.

He didn't take it personally, knowing that Loki absolutely hated it when someone was hurrying him in a complicated task and dealing with time was no easy matter. Instead, Thor held Loki close when he finally came to sleep, made sure he ate and visited him in the lab from time to time, also to give the mortals a breather.

Thor had to remind his brother many times that even if his companions were almost as brilliant as he was, they were still mortals and required more rest and food. Loki usually just smiled broadly at him and told him all about what they were doing as his friends went to get some food. Each time Thor listened with great interest, even if he wouldn't understand most of what  Loki was saying. It didn’t matter though, not when his brother looked delighted to tell him and have him actually listening.

Then Thor would go back to whatever he had been doing before going to see his brother and wonder just how awful he used to be if Loki seemed so happy just to have him listening with a smile. His throat clogged usually and he became quiet as he thought back to how he used to be, how ignorant and self-centered even if he himself hadn’t thought so. Thor knew he hadn’t been a bad man. Just...an ignorant and blind one, content to life in a world of black and white. Easily ignoring Loki when his brother would tell him something of his magic, too wrapped up in his glory to even care.

Each and every time Loki would come back to bed and kiss him soundly, berating his brother for being so sentimental, for allowing the past to haunt him. Thor only smiled sheepishly and watched over his brother as he slept, vowing not never again take Loki for granted. And each time that exact thing happened, his resolve only strengthened.

As usual, Thor was laying in bed, not yet asleep but close to it, waiting for Loki as usual. It was late, well into the night, but it was normal for his brother to come back at such time, too caught up in their work to notice the passing hours. Thor yawned and turned to his stomach, eyes slipping shut as he buried his face in Loki’s pillow breathing in his scent. He was so close to falling asleep, when the door opened and Loki came in, almost running.

“Thor! Wake up, you oaf!” his brother called almost breathless.

His eyes snapped open and Thor scrambled to sit, not yet panicked but a bit alarmed. Loki was staying near the bed, his emerald eyes alight with fire, a slightly mad grin dancing on his thin lips.

“We did it,” Loki announced with pride, still smiling widely, his seiðr cracking around his fingers in excitement.

It felt as if a great weight had been simultaneously taken from his shoulders and put on his heart. Thor breathed deeply and jumped from the bed, gathering Loki into his eyes and pulling him into a passionate kiss.

His brother was grinning still, his hands tangling in Thor’s short hair, tugging, and petting. When they finally broke apart, Thor simply looked at Loki proudly, still keeping him close with his arms around his waist.

“I knew you could do it,” Thor breathed, not a single sign of lies coming through. “That's amazing, Loki!”

The God of Chaos simply grinned and kissed him again and again, until they both toppled unto the bed, grinning into each other's mouths. It wasn't much, the whole problem was just starting, but it still felt like a victory they had desperately needed after Thanos. This was a start.

Chapter Text

Hello everyone!

As you can see, it's unfortunately not a chapter, and I am so so sorry about that. I promised myself I won't do it again, but life just got overwhelming very quickly.

Now, as an explanation and further promises:

This type of story isn't easy to write for me. I do love the plot and I have so many ideas, but this type of Time Travel is tricky and difficult to write. I really want to keep everyone in character, so it takes time to write a scene where they finally meet their past selves. I also still hadn't decided who will go with Thor and Loki, so if you have suggestions, please leave some! 

It's also hard to write when my life is such a mess. I had my academic session and it was very difficult, things didn't go the way I wanted them to, I had to retake an exam, I failed it as well. It's...much. I don't feel very good mentally and it's hard to write something that isn't smutty stress relief. I am working on chapter 2 and 3, but I ask you to be patient. I know how shitty that is of me, I'm a reader too, but I don't want to give you half-assed chapters wrote just to post something.

I want this work to be good, to be at the same level as the whole series and it's not as easy as I thought it would be. It's slow and I have to rewrite certain scenes a few times, add some parts and it's really really slow. I apologize for that.

Things are slowly looking better for me, and I'm really working on chapter 2. I hope to publish it soon enough. I'm really really sorry for how things look with this work, I didn't want it to happen and I always hate it when authors pull something like this off. I'm sorry. I'll try to do better.

Thank you for whoever is still waiting and reading this story! I really want to and will continue it, so thank you for all the kudos and comments. They really keep me up and motivated! Thank you for patience.