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Devon carries another box to the front of the store. He’s been helping Killian out but he’s not sure what to do about a more permanent job. He has quite a bit of caps saved, he sold a lot of looted equipment during his travels. The casino and guard provide the most jobs. But he really doesn’t want to be a guard. Maybe he could be a dealer at the casino...
Devon doesn’t pay the customers much attention, that’s what Killian’s good at. They both like people but Devon’s still kind of a stranger, Killian is of course well known. But when he hears his name, he looks up.
“That’s him,” Killian says and points.
A young woman approaches him while holding something out. “I got a letter from Tandi of Shady Sands.”
“Oh. Thanks. They’re not in trouble, are they?”
“Not that I’m aware of. Now where’s the nearest bar?”
He tips her a few caps then walks over to the counter with his letter. “I really hope the raiders haven’t come back.”
“Maybe it’s good news,” Killian says. “Fingers crossed.”
Devon opens it and reads out loud for his boyfriend. “Dear Devon, a group of ten people wearing vault suits just showed up in town. They’re looking for you, said the whole vault knows what the overseer did, and so they decided to leave too. I told them you were down south with your boyfriend. I also told them I’d send you a letter so you could come get them. Figured it was best not to send such fresh blood out into the wasteland. See you soon.” He looks at Killian. “I have to go. She’s right, they’ll die out here on their own.”
“Are you leaving today? You could go with the caravans tomorrow.”
“Yeah, that’s probably for the best. It times out nicely. Let me write a letter and give it to that courier before she leaves.” He goes to the back in search of a paper and pencil. Killian sells envelopes among a million other things, then he runs to the bar.
“Are you going back to Shady Sands?”
“When I’m finished drinking.”
He pays her and gives her the letter. He returns to the general store and sits down behind the counter.
“Wanna talk about it?”
Devon looks around, a couple stray customers are around. “I just...can’t believe they left. The first time I went back, they asked every question under the sun. They know how hard it is out here, it’s nothing like vault life.”
“They saw what Jacoren did was wrong. You came out alone and persevered, they probably thought they’d be safe in a group. They were able to make it to Shady Sands.”
“Yeah, people will be less likely to mess with them. Radscorpions are quick but they could outrun them.” He sighs. “I’ll have to teach them how to fight.”
“Are there guns in the vault?”
“Yes, but they’re guarded and locked up when not in use. There are classes on proper gun handling and target practice. I don’t know if they brought any. I really hope they didn’t have to wander into town completely unarmed. Uh, is there room in the Crash House? They have no money but I do.”
“You don’t have to pay.”
“I want to. Even with three to a room, that’s still almost four rooms for an indefinite amount of time.”
“Then we’ll work out a discount.”
He nods. That’s fine. Does he have to worry about jobs for everyone now? How old is the oldest, how young the youngest? Is his...is his grandma with them? He doubts it. She’s turning eighty-eight in a couple months. She can’t make the journey on foot and nobody’s going to push a wheelchair through mountains and desert. At least she knows he didn’t die out here. Would her heart even be able to handle such pain?
“You look troubled.”
“Just thinking about my grandma,” he murmurs. He knows Devon’s story. He knows Devon’s grandma isn’t biologically related to him. He comes from strange circumstances. His birth parents left the vault willingly when he was a baby. They’re probably either dead now or jet addicts. His grandma doesn’t like talking poorly about them but he’s gotten the story from others. They caused trouble from early on, when they were adults they had a baby they didn’t want. They didn’t even bother naming him. So a younger Jacoren gave him to Liena Lo, the woman who wanted him. The woman without kids of her own. Devon’s grandma.
His heart grows heavy as he thinks about how he’ll never see her again. An arm wraps around him and he leans against Killian. He has a few people in mind that he thinks left the vault and he hopes his best friend is among them. He has a lot of questions but they’ll be answered in a few days.
“I should pack a bag so I’m ready to leave tomorrow.” Killian squeezes his shoulder lightly before he stands. A customer comes to the counter so he leaves. Packing for a small trip to Shady Sands won’t take long. But it’ll give him some time to think in a quiet environment.
People left the vault in search of him. His exile probably caused more to leave than if Jacoren would’ve just let him say goodbye. The small petty side of him enjoys that fact but the rest of him just wants to get them safely to Junktown.
~~~~~
Devon feels relieved when Shady Sand’s walls are in sight. Traveling with this caravan will earn him a few spare caps, but he’s eager to see everyone. Once they’re at the entrance and he’s paid, Devon breaks from the group. He practically runs to the inn.
Tandi’s the first to see him and waves. He waves back and looks around, more than ten vault dwellers are here. But they all turn and stand in a hurry. Devon smiles wide when the first person to run right at him is indeed his best friend.
“Javier,” he whispers. Javier is hugging him tightly.
“Bitch, I fucking missed you!”
“I missed you too.” He and Devon used to talk every day. Since December, they’ve only seen each other twice. Being so alone for much of this time has been hard. When they finally pull back, he takes a look at everyone. “Tandi, this is more than ten.”
“More came!” she calls from the back.
“Some of us were torn, scared,” a woman, Natalie, explains. “We didn’t leave with the first group. But a few of us decided this was the right choice and we left too.”
“Jacoren can’t be happy about this.”
“That old geezer was pissed!” Javier exclaims. “He tried his hardest to keep us in but he couldn’t.”
“He...didn’t use threats, did he?”
“No, no, just tried to scare us. Told us it’d be a death trap out here but that only made us angry. How could he justify throwing you out here then? A good portion of the guards kind of agreed with us. Not enough to leave but to let us go.”
Devon takes a deep breath. This is a lot to take in.
“Oh! And before I forget!”
He watches Javier run to one of the tables then run back and hand him an envelope.
“From your grandma.”
Devon rips it open right there.
Devon,
As much as I want to see you, I’m afraid these old bones just can’t make such a journey. I trust that the others will find you well. You’ve saved not only this vault, but so many other lives. How could I possibly be any more proud of you? I wish I could hug you one last time but I know Javier will deliver this letter to you safely. I’m glad you’ll have him, and the others. Stay as safe as you can out there.
With all my love,
Grandma
There’s one other thing in the envelope. A garnet ring. The one she always wears. The one her mother owned before the war. He clasps it tightly in his hand. The tears come and he doesn't hold them back. He misses his grandma so much.
Javier’s arms wrap around him again. This can’t be it. This letter can’t be the final bit of communication between them. He has to let her know that he’s truly okay. He pulls back from his friend. “I have to go back. I have to try and see her. We can’t go to Junktown yet.” He looks at Tandi. “I’m gonna need these guys to stay a little longer.”
“That can be done.”
“At least take a minute to eat something,” someone says.
He nods. He is hungry. Everyone sits down and he asks for a chain or string or anything he can use for a necklace. Once he’s scarfing down food, Tandi hands him a small chain. It feels sturdy enough. He thanks her and puts his grandma’s ring on it, then tucks it under his clothing. He promises to come back as fast as he’s able, everyone understands his choice. They’ll be fine, they’re safe in town. Right now, his biggest priority is seeing his grandma.
Traveling through the mountains is a lonely journey. This is his third trip along this path. He should’ve tried harder last time, should’ve demanded to see his family and friends. Should’ve threatened.
Devon kicks a small rock.
He wouldn’t threaten the overseer. But he does wish he would’ve been a little firmer. He was just in so much shock. He won’t make that mistake twice.
When he finally reaches the cave, a small radscorpion crawls around the entrance. It darts towards him but doesn’t stand a chance against his shotgun. He’s a bit surprised no other scorpions roam the cave. The rats are still here but they leave him alone so he returns the favor.
The vault door taunts him. He stares at it before connecting his pip-boy to the intercom. “I’m back.”
“Devon?! Uh, uh, why? Did something happen to the others?”
“No, they’re safe in town. I need to speak to Jacoren. Tell him I want to see my grandma.”
“Yes, of course! Hold on.”
He’s not sure if he’s actually left waiting a long time or if it just feels that way. Nobody says another word but the door begins to open. He’s tense.
“You’re allowed in.”
He is surprised by that. He expected Jacoren to come out instead, expected an argument. He walks inside and listens to the door shut behind him. A guard and two engineers are in the control room. A couple empty chairs sit nearby.
“The overseer says he’s bringing Liena here.”
“I’m surprised he isn’t putting up a fight.”
“Us too...”
Jacoren lying is a possibility that crosses his mind but it’s unlikely. He wouldn’t be standing in this vault otherwise. His foot taps against the floor until the elevator opens. Sure enough, Jacoren walks out with his grandma. He ignores the overseer but rushes over. “Grandma!” Feeling her arms wrap around him is the best thing in the world.
Her wrinkled hands cup his face, she’s smiling wide. “I’ve missed you so much. It’s so good to see you.”
“I’ve missed you too.” He looks at Jacoren.
“We’ll leave you two alone.”
He retreats to the elevator, the other three behind. As Devon and his grandma sit down, he pulls the ring out and lets it hang on its chain.
“I see you found Javier and the others.”
“Yes, they’re in a town not far away. It’s called Shady Sands. The leader’s daughter is a friend and she sent me a letter telling me they arrived. Almost twenty people.”
“They were fed up. Everyone was outraged. Jacoren tried to spin it but...the people stationed here knew you came back. It wasn’t long until the entire vault found out.”
“I was so mad and just stunned. I still can’t believe he did what he did.”
“He said you wanted to leave anyways.”
“That’s...true. I’ve seen a lot, too much to return to vault life. I don't know if I can help on the surface. All I’m really good at is blowing stuff up. But I have a boyfriend. My plan was to say goodbye to everyone here then go back to Junktown. I knew it wouldn’t be easy but the overseer made it so much worse.”
She places a hand on his knee. “Tell me more about this boyfriend of yours.”
“His name is Killian. He owns a general store but he’s also the mayor of Junktown. Uh, that’s the town I live in now. It’s down south. His grandfather founded it after the war.” He tells the story of how they met--the assassin, Gizmo, the shootout. “I was still a bit new to the surface, still overwhelmed, but he was real good to me. I think I fell for him then but I had to move on. The vault needed water. I stopped to visit when I could. Once the cathedral and military base were taken care of...I took my time traveling back here. But by the time I reached Junktown and was with Killian...I knew the choice I had to make.” He suddenly bursts into tears. “I’m sorry,” he cries. “I chose to leave you. I’m sorry, Grandma. I’m so sorry-”
She stands and is hugging him and he’s sobbing against her vault suit. “Shh. Devon, baby, it’s okay. I was so scared when you were chosen to leave the vault, I’m still going to worry. Of course I’m going to miss you. But I’m not mad, I don’t blame you for your decision. If this is what you want, then I support you.”
He’s still crying. “I’m gonna miss you too.”
“I feel better hearing directly from you that you have somewhere to go.” Once she’s sure he’s calmed down a little, she sits back down.
“I care about Killian a lot. He’s a good man. I’m gonna see what work needs doing in town, I’d like to work in the casino.”
“You could be a bartender. You’re good with people.”
“That or a dealer. I...don’t know what’s going to happen with the others. I’m bringing them to Junktown, they can stay in the Crash House.”
“It’ll work itself out. Some of them might want to travel.”
“I could help them with that too. They won’t be just roaming the wasteland like I did.” He tells her everything that’s happened since his last visit, which is a lot. He knows she’ll spread word to the rest of the vault. They’ll finally have the full story, and they’ll know that he’s truly alright and the others will be too. Devon’s unsure how long they talk but he doesn’t want it to end. But eventually it has to.
“Wait here,” she says. “I’ll be back in a few minutes.”
It’s while she’s gone that he realizes saying goodbye to his grandma forever is going to be the hardest thing he’s ever done and will ever do. He doesn’t want to but he has to. The vault is no longer his home.
The elevator opens and he half-expects Jacoren to come toss him out. But it’s his grandma and she’s holding a small bag.
“Sorry that took longer than I meant. A few small things.”
He opens it and the first thing he finds is a picture frame. He grins. It’s a picture of them when he was twelve. They’re both holding up hats--it was the first one Devon knitted by himself. There’s knitting needles and different colored yarn, a teddy bear he’s had since he was a baby.
“I’m still angry at Jacoren for the way he handled things,” she admits. “Everyone is. I gave Javier the ring but I knew you’d come back.” She places a hand over her heart. “I felt it here.” It’s finally her turn to tear up. “I’m so proud of you. You being placed in my care was the greatest gift I could ever get. I love you.”
“I love you too. I’m sorry-”
“Don’t be. No one on this earth could ever replace you but I won’t be alone. I still have a vault full of friends.”
He knows that’s true. Her personality has always been warm and inviting, the vault residents have always flocked to her. He feels like he should say more and it’s not often he’s lost for words. But what else can he say besides how much he loves her? How lucky he is that she’s his grandma, how he’ll be okay out on the surface. Not only does he have Killian but now Javier and the others. Nothing can take away the pain in the knowledge that this is likely the final time they’ll see each other. His heart breaks as they hug and he promises to take care of himself. He goes to the intercom to let the others know they can come back. He can’t help but glare when Jacoren arrives.
“I’ll walk you out.”
Devon looks at his grandma. “Come with us.”
The walk to the cave feels longer than usual. They step out into the darkness and this is Liena’s first time stepping outside since her mother brought her to Vault 13 in 2077. She has vague memories of a bright blue sky and a tall shady tree. He wishes she could see the sky again and the mountains, feel the sun on her face.
“Before I go, I have a question.” It’s aimed at Jacoren.
“What is it?”
“Why did you let my birth parents leave?” It’s a question he’s never cared to have answered, but this is his last opportunity to ask.
“Because I thought they’d only cause more trouble. They were...not suited for vault life. They stole, bullied, and I feared their behavior would only grow more severe. I thought the other residents would be safer and better off without them so when they came to me and said they wanted to go and that they’d hurt me if I disagreed, I let them. It was an easy choice.”
“Did you ever hear from them again?”
“No, I did not.”
That answer is satisfactory. They’re probably dead by now and if they aren’t, he has no interest in them. He tucks the ring back under his clothes, vowing to protect it. He frowns at his grandma and hugs her again, trying to think if there’s anything at all he still needs to tell her. But there’s nothing he hasn’t already said.
She cups his face again. “I love you. Stay happy out here. And tell your boyfriend I say hello.”
He nods, trying hard to keep himself together. Looking in her eyes, he can tell she’s trying to do the same. He can barely manage anything above a whisper. “I will. I love you too.” They hug a final time and it’s so difficult to pull away. “Guess I should get back to the others. I wasn’t in town even an hour before I left again. Bye.”
“Bye, baby.”
His eyes flit over to Jacoren. “See ya.”
“Goodbye, Devon.”
His grandma kisses his cheek and then he has to walk away. When he hears the door closing, he spins around not knowing what he’s hoping to see. It shuts, the residents are barred from the outside world once again.
He’s alone.
But he won’t be for long. He may no longer be able to see or talk to his grandma, but he’ll always carry her love--and the ring, a symbol of that love--with him always. He still has Javier and Killian.
He got to say goodbye. It hurts but he’s glad he had the chance. Not seeing her would’ve only hurt more.
Devon doesn’t camp inside the cave this time. He walks outside and stares up at the sky, the same sky his grandma looked at so many years ago. It’s going to be a long trip back to Junktown but at least this time, he doesn’t have to do it alone.