Chapter Text
It seemed inherently against your nature to be acknowledged or recognized on a grand scale; not only because of your uncommon profession, but also because you simply wouldn’t put up with it. Attention and admiration brought chaos and disorder to a carefully organized life, and thus, you truly enjoyed your position aboard the Enterprise.
As the head of the education department, you still had an exceptionally active career. You taught classes, of course, and were required to attend some diplomatic events. Not only that, you were considered an expert in your field, and were sometimes recruited to assist other planets’ governments in their education programs during the Enterprise’s stay. However, the majority of the crew never gave much of a thought to the education program, and your work was always conducted in the background of more exciting conflicts and mysteries. You were glad for this, because, after all, acknowledgement rather frightened you, and you enjoyed being left out of the spotlight.
It wasn’t as though you were totally isolated, though. Being a literature professor, Counselor Troi had taken an interest in your work, and she had quickly become a trusted friend. This gave you an ‘in’ to the higher officials on the Enterprise, as well as Dr. Crusher’s favorable opinion for you and everything that you’d taught her son. For the most part, you enjoyed spending time with them, although Captain Picard had always intimidated you. Regardless, the crew seemed to hold reasonable respect for you and your work.
No, you were never truly recognized until that fateful night in the bar, when your life changed for good.
It was a Friday night, and the top Enterprise officials had gathered in the bar to celebrate, as was tradition. Counselor Troi, or Deanna, as she allowed you to call her, had invited you along, and although part of you wanted nothing more than to remain in your room and read, you realized that isolation could be taken to an unhealthy extreme, and forced yourself to accept.
You and Deanna sat at a table beside the windows, earnestly discussing the Jane Austen book that you’d recommended to her. “I must say, you never steer me wrong, y/n,” Deanna admitted, turning the book over in her hands and smiling down at it. “I’m afraid I’ve become hooked.”
“Good,” you said sincerely, excited at her enthusiasm. “My mission is to make everyone on board addicted to reading, after all. Jane Austen seemed like your type of author.”
“I think it’s interesting how accurately you personalize your suggestions,” Deanna said with admiration, looking up at you and smiling gently.
“That’s why I’m thinking of starting a new program with my students. I want to do private interviews with each of them, and then be able to have a unique book recommendation prepared for them. One kid who hates Jane Austen might love Kurt Vonnegut, and one kid who hates Vonnegut might love Dickens. Literature is too diverse to condemn all of it based on one author they might dislike,” you gushed. You’d been developing the idea for quite a while, and already had an extensive list of students’ names with book titles next to them.
“That’s a wonderful idea,” Deanna said encouragingly. “I think that whenever you have the time, you-“
“Counselor? Sorry to interrupt.” You looked up to see Geordi standing politely next to your table, his hands tucked behind his back. You were relieved to see Geordi; you’d gotten along fairly well with him in the past, and, unlike Picard or Riker, he was openly friendly and had never intimidated you before. “Captain Picard wants to see you on the bridge.”
“Of course. I’ll see you later, y/n,” Deanna called over her shoulder as she stood to leave.
“Sorry, y/n, I couldn’t help but overhear what you were talking about. I think it’s perfect,” Geordi said, smiling kindly.
You returned his smile, then, your manners returning to you, you indicated the chair across from you. “Would you like to sit down?”
“Thanks, y/n, I’ve been on my feet all day.” Geordi sat down with his drink, and you tried your hand at small talk, asking him how his day had gone and receiving a full report of all the various chaos that had occurred in the engineering room. Even though Deanna was gone, you were thankful for Geordi for making you feel welcome among all the high-ranking officers, and fortunately, Dr. Crusher walked by and gave you a friendly greeting, also serving to boost your confidence.
As you and Geordi swapped anecdotes, the automatic doors opened to allow a certain android into the room. Lieutenant Commander Data, Geordi’s best friend, remained an absolute enigma to you. He didn’t quite intimidate you, the way Picard and Riker did, but he didn’t exactly make you feel comfortable either, not like Deanna or Geordi or Dr. Crusher. You’d had a fair share of interactions with the android, and you had a respect for him that you hadn’t anticipated having. You enjoyed your discussions with him, but you hadn’t spent enough time around him to truly form an opinion. It was odd to see him at the bar, as he rarely ever came, but you supposed he was there for Geordi. Indeed, he made a direct beeline to your table, clear purpose reflected in his intelligent yellow eyes.
“Hello, Data,” Geordi greeted his friend cheerfully. You smiled up at him, not wanting to come off as unfriendly.
“Hello, Geordi. I do not intend to intrude upon your conversation, but I must consult with Miss y/l/n in private,” Data stated calmly, glancing over at you. Your heart plummeted and your stomach was sick with worry. Were you going to be in trouble? What if you were being fired, or demoted? Then again, you’d done nothing wrong, and you hadn’t broken any rules. You attempted to calm yourself and took a deep breath to try to reduce your heart rate.
“Oh- of course, Data.” Geordi stood, puzzled, and allowed Data to take his chair. “I’ll see you around, y/n.”
“Bye, Geordi,” you said, smiling briefly at him before he disappeared back into the crowd. You returned your attention to Data, who had settled himself across from you, a notebook on the table in front of him. “What can I do for you, Data?” you asked, fighting to keep your voice calm. Why else would he ask to speak to you unless there was some sort of issue? Your nervousness invaded your thinking again.
Data seemed to gather himself, tilting his head curiously to consider you. It was a rather endearing habit of his, to tilt his head to the side inquiringly at his conversation partner. “Miss y/l/n-“
“You can call me y/n, Data,” you reassured him quietly, wishing he would get to the point.
“Y/n,” he corrected himself. “Do you recall the incident with my brother, Lore, and the range of emotions he demonstrated throughout his residence aboard the Enterprise?”
It wasn’t an incident that you were actively involved in, but you had caught the occasional glimpse of Lore, and you’d heard Wesley whispering to his friends in class about what had happened. You had a relatively good knowledge base on Lore, so you nodded.
“I would like to preface my proposal by assuring you that I am fully aware of the flaws that Lore possessed and the dangers that his emotions caused, and I have accepted the possibility that if the experiment fails, then I, too, may commit acts of violence-“
“Data,” you said gently, even though you were desperately confused. “What are you proposing?”
Data raised his eyebrows, tilting his head again. “I suppose I am informing you that I have selected you as the exemplary human being that I would like to model myself after.”
Your breath caught in your throat. Inexplicable anxiety clawed at you once more. “Data, what in the seven heavens…”
“Surely, you are aware of my ongoing mission to, essentially, become as human as my programming will allow me to be. For countless years, I have observed emotions and distinctly human traditions that fascinate me and have instilled a desire to experience them as humans have. Deceit, for example, insecurities, anxiety, such as you are displaying even now.” You blushed slightly, looking down at the table. “Suffering, sarcasm, violence, bitterness… all traditionally considered unpleasant, and yet, provoking such extreme reactions from every being they touch. I desire to be a part of that. I am undertaking a dangerous- and potentially impossible- experiment to attempt to achieve cultivation of such emotion.”
It all sounded rather convoluted to you, but you admired his mission, and, ultimately, felt sympathy for him. He wanted something so badly, something he would never have, and yet he held out hope that someday, he could achieve it. As a literature professor, you couldn’t imagine living without emotions, reading without having the emotional perspective that you’d always had inherently. You supported Data in his experiment, but you were still confused.
“I understand what you’re saying, Data, but why involve me?” you asked curiously.
Data tilted his head to the side again, his fingertips tapping on the notebook in front of him. “I would very much appreciate if you would allow me to conduct research on you, y/n- and better yet, if you would supervise and guide me in my various attempts. I cannot do this successfully without a human’s assistance.”
“Data, of course I’ll help you, but…” You were still so desperately confused. “Why me? Why not Geordi? I don’t understand.”
“I had expected that response. I made my decision based on the various human ideals that you seemed to meet and exceed throughout your interactions. Your profession, after all, is deeply rooted in emotion and humanity. Your appreciation of literature above other subjects is indicative of an interest and proficiency in emotional expression, and your success at becoming the head of the education program reveals a steady ambition and a passion for teaching. Despite the numerous advancements and papers that you have produced in your field, you are content with little recognition and possess a humility that I have observed through your reluctance to discuss your accomplishments. Your kindness is an extreme attribute, as is your polite conduct and-“
“Oh, Data, for heaven’s sake…” You quickly covered your face, feeling yourself blushing deeply. “I’m not… perfect, or anything…”
“Of course not. It is only human nature to have flaws. I was not implying that you possess absolute perfection. Simply put, you are perfect for my purposes.” Something about this sentence made your heart skip a beat, and your blush deepened. Data picked up the notebook, opening the cover. “I have compiled a list of attributes that you would contribute to my experiment, if you chose to. If you still have objections, I might suggest that you look through these.”
“No,” you said nervously, doubting you could handle that. “Data, of course I’ll help you. You’ve been so kind to me and you’ve said so many nice things. If you truly think that I’m… what is it you said?”
“You are perfect for my purposes.”
“Yes, thank you.” You hadn’t truly forgotten, you’d simply wanted to hear it again; it may have been vain, but you really did feel a delighted shiver up your spine when you heard these words. “What’s our first step?”
Data stood. “We will meet tomorrow for the interview. I have an extensive set of initial questions I would like to pose before we truly begin.”
“Right. Well, I suppose I’ll see you then, Data.”
The android nodded politely at you, turning to leave the bar. You watched him go until the doors closed behind him, then gazed out the window, the conversation fueling your thoughts.