Archive of Our Own

Flaxen as a melting Icarus, Edward's eyes burned into the ceiling above. It was as though, despite the layers of lath and plaster, the telescopes on his face were focusing into space. Winry has seen his eyes light with the same flame before, but it could only be triggered by one muse: scientific enlightenment. Even with his alchemic abilities absent, Edward's brain was still running at one-hundred miles a minute -- assessing the materials around him, calculating how much to move, communicating his energy with the earth below. Whether or not he could use alchemy, Edward Elric was, is, and always will be an alchemist, this life and on.

"Infinitum alchemy."

Winry gave Ed a funny look. "What alchemy?"

"Infinitum," he answered in confidence. "The Xerxian word for Infinity. It's just a branch of philosophical alchemy. It's all theory for now, and Al and I are still working on the name, of course." 

An arm pillowing under Winry's head as they lied on her bed, Edward scratched the side of his neck, wearing one of his signature grins.

His mouth lost the grin. "In our encounter with Truth, Al and I realized that expectations can always be exceeded. Science isn't just a rigid set of laws; we all know this after centuries of building on it, finding new theories and discovering what our ancestors could have never imagined." His free hand went limp over his bangs, splayed over his nose and the sides of his face. "I'm not sayin' Truth is God, but Truth is proof of possibility that something bigger may exist. Souls. Dimensions. Other universes. Other worlds. Maybe, say, deities."

Winry was shocked to hear anything god-related come from Edward's mouth. She always assumed he was a straight atheist; it seemed his ideas have loosened a little.

"While I was in Creta, I discovered something in one of their libraries. There was an old book on astronomy. It said that the celestial bodies, the planets, work and operate like living organisms. Earthquakes. Volcanic eruptions. The atmosphere. Earth is constantly changing, aging, breathing, like life. Astronomers came to the conclusion that Earth is one massive, super-organism. This clicked because, during that Promised crap, the bearded-bastard said something about the planet having memories, which he foolishly figured could unlock the knowledge of a god. He used the planet's gateway, on that day."

Edward paused in recollection, then continued, "If we thought life limits to us, we were sorely mistaken. We're just microorganisms on a much bigger-bodied living thing. Another example of overturning equivalent exchange."

The corners of his lips tugged upward. "Now, I can't wait to collaborate with Al on his research of the East. I know how different their concepts are, especially with alkahestry."

When his eyes came back to Earth, he paused to glance at Winry. Body turned to his side, her rounded blue eyes stared loyally, like a child intaking new information, though he couldn't be sure if she was just keeping her eyes open out of courtesy or truly listening. 

His lips pressed into a thin line. "Sorry, I'm rambling about my alchemy-stuff again."

Winry finally blinked. Shaking her head, she placed it on his rising chest and replied, "No, I like hearing about your alchemy-stuff. Besides, now I have ammo to tell you all about my automail-stuff."

Ed turned his head away, tongue sticking out in ill-mannered disinterest. Winry stiffled out a chuckle and slapped his chest. 

"Oh, hush. You like hearing about it. The engineering part, at least," she uttered. "Anyway, didn't you find more on - what's it called? - astrology?"

Ed answered, "Astronomy. But it's a dead science. There was only mild interest for it in the years of the Xerxes empire. Because of that, there isn't much research fulfilled, and as for modern research, it's non-existent."

For Winry, the answer was simple. "Then research it yourself."

"That's what I planned to do," he explained. "All of the sciences are incorporated with alchemy—hell, it's astrology-based—so why not astronomy? When I go back again, I'm going to do just that."

"Wait," Winry interjected, eyebrows pulling together. "You're saying you haven't finished your research? And you came back home?"

To Ed's wide-eyed cowardice, she began to sit up. "You can't just leave yourself on a cliffhanger like that!" she exclaimed.

"It'll be years before I finish that research anyway!" he barked back. He joined her in sitting up. "And I came back because I missed my family."

Family. The fact that Edward admitted her and Granny as his family still made her feel warm at her core. 

The young woman locked gazes with him, intense as their staring contests usually were. She won this one, staring long after he broke her gaze with his back to her, sitting over the edge of the bed. 

"And..." came out of the broad-backed man, voice lower. "...I came back for... a, uh, 'nother reason."

She kept her eyebrows high and her ears open. Winry didn't bother asking, hoping the explanation would come out on its own, though she was on the edge of doing so when it took him a while to elaborate. Again, his mind was working one-hundred miles a minute.

Ed started speaking with rough, choked out words, which gradually silkened. "Remember, at the train station? What I said about equivalent exchange...?"

Winry gave him a half-nod; like he could even see it. Bracing herself, she swallowed down the excess saliva that swam over her tongue. Ed had just gotten back that day, vanishing into thin air without a phone call or warning letter (in typical Edward fashion), and not once had he mentioned their "exchange" when she saw him off at the station six months before. 

Finally, a hiss seeped through her teeth, "Yes."

Hand on his automail knee, he faced her, wearing an expression weighted with much more seriousness. 

"I want to start that..." he said. "...Now."

The look on Winry's face made Edward want to eat his words. Surprise was evident in her features, and the longer she said nothing, the more anxious he became. 

"I-I mean," he started, with a knife to the silence. His hand went to the back of his neck, nervously rubbing over the skin. "I-I see no point in waiting, I know we're young, but... we both know what we want. You're my best friend and the only family I can see myself having is with you." 

His eyes wandered off to the side. "I just love you, you know?"

They have professed to themselves that they loved the other, they have even known that they loved each other, confessing it through metaphors and actions, but this was the first time Ed has ever said the word "love" for Winry out loud.

The next thing he knew, the backside of a hard cover book was clashing with his cranium. 

"Shit, woman!" Ed near-screamed. "Are you trying to give me brain damage?!"

After that, he found himself nearly tipping off the bed with Winry's forced weight hitting his body. Her arms swung aroung his neck, face pressed into his shoulder.

"How long before you have to continue your research?" she asked, just above a whisper.

Edward released his initial shock to think on that. Then, he answered, "I don't have any set date."

A smile lit her up, but was hidden by the rough cloth of his coat over his shoulder. "Then, I'd say... a month or two. To get our affairs in order. I can't give you eighty-five percent until I have your last name, right?"

Afterward, she released him to lie partially on her back, looking up at him. He seemed taken aback that she accepted. Her arms opened up for him, grabbing hold of his tough forearms.

"Come here. Tell me about your alchemy-stuff again." She knew that calmed his nerves—when he was able to explain scientific principles. It was like reading a bedtime story to himself.

He gladly accepted. Letting his arms drape loosely around her waist, he said,

"The same force that moves the planets, also moves us. All of these energies are inside of us. The Gate gives us access to those energies—that's what permits alchemy."

Even when her eyes were closed, she was still listening. She could hear the words drumming, "...The most important concept to understand about sect is the balance between 'showing forth' and 'appearance'. 'Showing forth' means expressing the true nature of a thing with no guile or deception. 'Appearance', on the other hand, is just the opposite, because looks can be deceiving. The more diurnal a planet is, the more it 'shows forth', and the more nocturnal a planet is, the more it 'appears'..."