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She couldn’t bring herself to sleep. There she was, wide awake in the middle of the night, on a dark cabin aboard her ship, if it was just like all the other times, she would just roll to her side and close her eyes. But this wasn’t the case, this time Daenerys Targaryen wasn’t alone. She looked down at the man laying on her belly with his body between her legs, his wild black curls were spread around his head. His eyes were close, and his mouth was partially open, she could swear she heard some light snoring indicating he was on a deep sleep. The little smile that formed on her lips at the sight was inevitable. Dany gently caressed his back, strong and soft, while admiring his naked body tangled on hers like they were meant to be together. Everything about it seemed so right.
For the first time since Jon Snow knocked on her door, she let herself think. It felt right, but it wasn’t, not if she was thinking straight. Dany could almost hear Tyrion’s voice. Jon Snow was named King in the North, yet, he bend the knee. She knew the northern men had a reputation of being stubborn and her being the Mad King’s daughter and all those other things people called her didn’t exactly helped it. The last thing she, or any of them, needed was for the foreign whore being caught sharing a bed with their leader. The list was long, she herself even made up a few of the items since she met Jon all those months ago. A way to convince herself to not feel the things she was feeling. It was foolish of her- Dany couldn’t control her feelings, not this time, not for this man. She tried hard thought, of that no one could blame her for. All the times she used her queenly voice to cover up her fears and insecurities. The times she pretended she didn’t care about him. It got harder and harder with time, her imagination never helped, she was a woman after all and a woman who hadn’t been with a man in so long. At night, alone, her mind and fingers betrayed any logical thought about Jon Snow and the fantasies and feelings took place in an instance. But nothing could ever prepare her for the reality.
He wasn’t just another lover she had taken to her bed. He wasn’t Daario, he was quite the opposite, really. And he sure as hell wasn’t like her first husband. Jon Snow was…. Dany still couldn’t put into words. She looked at his face again, still in the same position, lips parted and on a deep sleep, trying to figure out what words to use to describe him was hard. He was indeed very handsome. But it wasn’t that…. She had noticed his prettiness on their first meeting but back them there was still a part of her that considered introducing him to her children- and not in a good way. His body was pretty damn good looking too, even with the scars- that she didn’t dare to ask him about it, not yet at least. Even though she kissed each one of them just a few hours ago words weren’t exchanged about it, she would let him tell her in his time. It wasn’t any of that, it was his heart. He was a good one, there wasn’t one inch of evil inside of him. He was so pure that sometimes Dany thought she wasn’t worth of him- all the things she did even if it was for the greater good. But Jon is here with her anyway, maybe one day they can talk about their past with all the honesty in the world, she will love that very much.
Daenerys thoughts were interrupted when Jon changed positions, well, he changed the side of his head that was laying on her belly. He looked so much younger, almost like a child seeking confront. She knew Jon’s childhood was far from perfect, just like hers. The sudden urge of somehow changing that and doing right by him emerged on her chest, imagining him being mistreat as a little boy made her angry and sad at the same time. He had been broken since the start, doomed because of his birth, again, just like her. The similarities in their lives was countless. They lived their lives until that moment so far apart from each other, but their paths were almost the same. Daenerys never believed in any goods, but if destiny had indeed brought Jon Snow to her, maybe that was the reason. Maybe they were made for each other, to find happiness and love among all the darkness they had to endure. Love. When was the last time that word really meant something to her? She couldn’t remember now… Was with her brother? With the Khal? Neither of them felt right to compare. Just because she thought as love back then doesn’t mean it was love. All of that was necessity. With Jon it was different. She just knew.
Looking around her room, all the mess they had made, their clothes all over the place. It was good, so good. He did things to her she never knew it was possible. He made her feel things she never knew she could feel. It was everything she imagined it to be and more. Dany knew he imagined it too, Jon Snow was a man of few words but every time he whispered sweet nothings to her and screamed her name, it all sounded like the most beautiful song in the world. But now here they are, the realization of facing the reality filled her eyes with tears. She would talk to him in the morning. But what if he regrets it? What if that was just lust and nothing more? What if… No. That wasn’t Jon. Daenerys quickly took her mind of those lame questions. The way he looked at her said it all, still there are so many other problems that this… Relationship? Whatever it was- would cause. That was a matter for later, now she would just….
“Dany?” She turned her head in the direction of his soft voice and her heart was full of love. Jon Snow, looking at her with his puppy eyes that could melt her body in the second, his head still in contact with her skin like it was the world’s best pillow.
“Yes?” Dany almost whispered, while her right hand found his curls to caress.
“Where were you? Your eyes felt so distant, is everything alright?”
“Yes, everything is perfect.” And like it was the most frequently thing to do, Jon Snow smiled at her, kissed her hand, closed his eyes and went back to sleep.
In that very moment Daenerys realized all her fears were nothing but that. It was indeed right, everything will be alright.