Chapter Text
“I don’t know, it’s just all so much, a lot of the time.” Dr. Eve sat across from Ten at a table in a small, rather unremarkable coffee shop, somewhere in Michigan. There’d been a lot of going back and forth within the safe house about if Ten should go, or not. Texts were exchanged, agreements made, arrangements, and in the end, the consensus was that Ten could visit with the researcher they’d gotten along with in the past, provided Xavier and one of the Diannas were present. The pair were respectful enough to sit out of earshot, but they were watching very intently. Ten may have trusted Eve, and all memories of her pointed to her being genuinely kind, but there were still risks. Besides that, Ten’s judgment was still suspect.
“Well, yes, Janus. A lot happened, and a lot of it was bad. It’s not unusual to feel overwhelmed,” there was some awkwardness hanging in the air. They both knew what had gone down, or, Ten was pretty sure Eve had some idea, they weren’t sure how much her wife divulged. They were certain she knew of the breach, and pretty sure she knew about the Sparks situation, at least somewhat. If nothing else, she knew Ten had resigned, which she would know was not something they would have done, if everything was fine. Neither of them wanted to address all of that.
Ten didn’t want to criticize the Foundation, either. Both because they still could not internalize that not everything was their own doing, and because it would be monumentally unwise to do so, here. That wasn’t what they’d hoped to get out of this meeting, anyway. “I haven’t spoken openly with anyone in a very long time, Eve,” they swallowed, looking around. Damn near a century of paranoia doesn’t fade easily, “I wouldn’t even know where to start.”
“Janus,” Eve’s voice was gentle, friendly, a bit softer than Ten remembered it being, during other exchanges, but then again, this was a very different kind of interaction. Ten’s practiced apathy and neutral face had been abandoned, this she could tell, and she could tell Ten was anxious, “No one is here to judge you, or take you out for saying the wrong thing, first of all. And second, you don’t have to tell them everything right out of the gate. Most therapists will understand if you need time to open up.”
“I want to get it right, though.”
Eve sighed, had Ten really been hiding this sort of thing this whole time? That was certainly not healthy, “There is no right or wrong. Not with that.” There was something jarring about seeing Ten like that, vulnerable and afraid. Still, she wanted to help. Ten wasn’t always the nicest person, their actions weren’t always the most agreeable, but they deserved to heal, and she’d been friendly with them.
That didn’t make a lot of sense, to Ten. They were still so used to lists of regulations, rules, and requirements. To forms, and formalities, everything having a place, and an order. They weren’t going to argue, though. Eve knew more about this, she was probably right.
“You should start with whatever you feel is most pressing right now. Start with whatever’s at the forefront of your thoughts.”
They nodded. They could do that, they’d have to.